[Darkness. Then the camera fades in, you are inside the locker room of RCW National Champion - "Mr. Excitement" Alex Extreme, who is busy preparing for his match. As he starts to lace up his boots, the locker room to his door swings open to reveal a familiar face.] Alex Extreme: (pointing a finger of warning) "Get the hell out of here - NOW!" [A laughing Eric Vanguard shakes his head and tosses his duffel bag down on a bench opposite Extreme. He is wearing a pair of black dress slacks, a dark blue button down shirt, and a straight leather jacket that hangs down past his waist. With a look of contentment on his face, he raises his hands and pulls his black shades down off his nose.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Don't go giving me that attitude, Al - because quite frankly I am as pissed off about this situation as you are. But after War Cry the other night, I sat and did some thinking - and I came to a realization. Of course you want me as your partner - after all, I think it was ME that handed you the belt on a silver platter in the first place." Alex Extreme: That's like saying Al Gore didn't really win Florida. You're full of crap Vanguard. I'd have won whether you and the Upstarts caused trouble or not. It was my time--not yours or anyone else's. "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "You believe what you want - but the fact of the matter is this. If I want to get my shot at The RCW National Title later tonight, we have to win that tag match. Alex Extreme and Eric Vanguard have to work as a te-" [Suddenly Extreme hops up from his seat and raises a hand to silence Vanguard.] Alex Extreme: Excuse me? YOUR shot? I picked you as my partner as a punishment for you parading around with that belt of mine - claiming to be The RCW National Champion! That means you don't get a chance to be champion you prick. [A grin soon appears on the unshaven face of the former prison guard.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Oh yeah? Didn't Jimmy tell you? He added a stipulation that if *I* get the pin, then I get a shot at your belt. Which I happen to have with me right here..." [Vanguard pulls back the zipper on the gym bag and pulls out a manila envelope, sliding it under his arm - as he looks for The RCW National Title. He finally finds the belt and tosses it across the room to Alex Extreme.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "I'd really appreciate it if you shined it up real nice. Because it's coming back home in this bag again tonight!" [You can practically see the smoke coming out of Alex Extreme's ears, as Vanguard picks the bag up and leaves - closing the door behind him. Suddenly your screen fills with static, and the familiar S-KAM logo appears.] LVK: "Here we go again!" [As the static disappears, the view switches to the hallway just outside the locker room of Alex Extreme. "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard wanders out to find RCW President Jim Catanzaro waiting for him. The President of RCW extends a hand to Vanguard...] Jim Catanzaro: "Okay, you got your stipulation on the match - now give me the pictures!" [Eric Vanguard nods his head and pulls the envelope out from underneath his arm. As Jim Catanzaro reaches to take it from him, Vanguard snaps it away saying...] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Woah Jimbo! Not so quick! You'll get the pictures when I'm good and ready!" Jim Catanzaro: "For the love of God Eric, I've done everything! I've demanded the four way! I gave you a first blood match! AND now I am giving you a shot at the RCW National Title should your team win! What do you want me to do, hand you the damn belt on a silver platter?" "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Basically. Oh, and if I *don't* walk out here as RCW National Champion tonight - I am going to expose your little secret to the WORLD!" [Vanguard smiles and tucks the envelope back under his arm and turns to leave, walking in the general direction of the camera. Suddenly he freezes and pulls his retractable nightstick out of his pocket.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Oh and Jimmy, one more thing!" [Catanzaro turns on his heels, worried about what Vanguard is going to say.] "Excessive Force: Eric Vanguard: "Tell Vlad to get rid of these damn cameras!" [In one swift motion, Vanguard spins around and brings the nightstick smashing against the lens of the camera - shattering it to a thousand pieces as the scene immediately cuts back to Extreme who throws on his wrestling gear, puts on his shades, and heads out of the locker room like a man possessed.] [Fade to black.] [The mellow, sad instrumental beginning of "In the Shadow of the Valley of Death" by Marilyn Manson begins to play as the screen fades up again into black and white footage of "Mr Excitement" Alex Extreme. He nails "The Extreme" on an opponent; stands in the ring and looks at a crowd with a look of determination on his face; pins Chris Hopper at Total Impact: Battle for the Gold to become the first National Heavyweight champion.] #We have no future Heaven wasn't made for me We burn ourselves to hell As fast as it can be# [Extreme punches Bryce Jordan; argues with RCW President Jim Catanzaro, and holds up the belt after beating Hopper.] #I wish I could be the king Then I'd know that I am not alone# [The last image freezes - Extreme with the belt high above his head, his face a mixture of exhaustion and pure adrenaline. The atmospheric acoustic music continues in the background, but at a low volume, as a deep voice comes in over the top.] VO: From the moment Alex Extreme became RCW's inaugural National Heavyweight Champion, all eyes have been on him. All eyes, and all target-sights, because with the most prestigious title in independent wrestling strapped firmly around his waist, the man they call "Mr Excitement" has become "Mr Hunted". [The image unfreezes, and we get more short black and white clips of Extreme, all with the National title belt. Still the eerie music continues.] VO: Top of the list of hunters stand three men...... ....A long-time nemesis.... [Black and white image of Chris Hopper, smiling and slapping hands with the fans as he makes his way to the ring.] VO: A young pretender to the throne.... [Black and white image of Bryce Jordan, standing mid-ring and smiling arrogantly at the fans, who are booing him.] VO: ....and the proverbial wolf in sheep's clothing.....a thief in the guise of authority.... [Black and white image of Eric Vanguard with the National title belt, which he of course stole from Extreme and paraded around with.] VO: Two of the three have been granted their chance to dethrone the king, while the third has been thrust into the role of reluctant comrade-at-arms for the champion. [Four-way split screen of the four men, this time in colour.] VO: Their battles have been the stuff of legend - bloody, hard-fought and thrill-packed. But when the four collide in one ring, a suitable venue of battle must be chosen. That is why tonight River City Wrestling has chosen the ultimate battlefield..... [The image of a steel cage suddenly appears over the four-way split with a loud and echoing "clank".] VO: Only one structure can hold all of this emotion, all of this rage..... [Next we get a shot of the Rage in the Cage structure, with the ring inside, as the camera swings in a full aerial circle around it, taking in all angles. There's no crowd or anything - just the cage and the ring.] VO: 20 feet high....a roof and door preventing escape....nothing but intense, contained hell. Nothing....but.... ___ _ / __\__ _ __ _ ___ __| | / / / _` |/ _` |/ _ \/ _` | / /__| (_| | (_| | __/ (_| | \____/\__,_|\__, |\___|\__,_| |___/ ____ / __ \ __ _ __ _ ___ | \/ // _` |/ _` |/ _ \ | __ \ (_| | (_| | __/ |_| \ \__,_|\__, |\___| \_\ |___/ [After the Caged Rage logo explodes onto the screen amidst a fiery explosion, the heavy funk/rap/metal of "Waiting to Die" by Hed(PE) starts to blare, and rapid-fire clips of RCW wrestling action flash on the screen....] #I don't give a f#$k I'm a Hitman, I'm a Stalker I'm a Soldier, I'm a Street Walker# [Tripp Shade and Vic Valiant nail The Gorilla with the Double Feature; Vlad Stukovski nearly decapitates an opponent with his Russian Sickle lariat.] #F#$k you You don't know me, I'm a freak Never slow down, never sleep# [Mr Honeydew II nails Johnny Axis with the Dew Point II kick to the groin; Jason Blake executes the Blindsider on Sean Cage.] #I get so high Don't play with me See me, stay away from me# [Cyn Garibaldi smiles seductively for the camera; Carson Nash nails JD Laredo with a vicious chairshot.] #Just let me ride No you can't fade me I ain't trying to hear S$!t that you're saying to me# [Chris Hopper sends Bryce Jordan through a hole in the scaffold, down through stacks of tables, in their scaffold match; Team Canada walk out of the entranceway, huge grins on their faces.] #Everybody dies..... Everybody dies...... Everybody dies...... Just let me# [Raya Oscura leaps off the top of a school bus, onto Erik Jorgensen; Jim Lewis jr and Michael White trade punches.] #There is nothing wrong with me I'm not trying to see things your way! I'm not lost I'm not drowning I'm not lost....# [Eric Vanguard and Bryce Jordan go crashing off a raised forklift platform onto the floor below.] #I'm just waiting.....waiting to die!# [KA-BOOM!!!! A burst of bright red pyro greets us as the camera reopens on the inside of a packed-out Savvis Arena. The pyro lights up the entire ring area, and brings a HUGE POP from the excited fans. Immediately apparent is the large metal structure hanging over the ring like a gruesome metallic black cloud.] LVK: WELCOME TO ST LOUIS, MISSOURI!!!! WELCOME TO THE SAVVIS CENTER.....WELCOME TO RIVER CITY WRESTLING..... .......AND WELCOME ONE AND ALL TO......CAGED RAGE!!!!!! [The camera pans through the excited crowd, as pyro starts to shoot into the air from the entranceway stage, above and behind which the RiverTron kicks into life, featuring the words "RCW Total Impact: CAGED RAGE" in black writing on a background of fire. The entranceway is comprised of a black metallic stage standing some 10 feet above the arena floor, with a black and silver ramp leading down from it to the aisleway, which is bordered by black iron-pipe ring railings on either side. The center of the entranceway is a black cloth curtain, with the RCW logo on it in red. And of course the RiverTron looms above all of this. And above all of this is suspended a huge, wide wooden platform, with criss-crossing iron supports leading to the ground below. The ring features a white mat with a blue RCW logo and red Fox Sports logo, dark blue ringropes, and light blue turnbuckle pads. From the ring apron to the floor hangs a dark blue apron-skirt, which bears the word "Total Impact" in white handwriting-type writing. The ringside floor is covered in a thin dark blue matting, and the same metal ring railing as was just seen in the aisleway circles the ringside area. Then one of the ringside cameras pans up to show the Rage in the Cage structure hanging above the ring. The lights dim, and a series of spotlights flash over it, giving the steel monstrosity an ominous presence.] LVK: There, hanging high above the ring, is the structure into which four of wrestling's brightest stars will step tonight, in the very first Rage in the Cage match sanctioned by RCW. The National Heavyweight Championship will be on the line, but once the door closes on that cage, all thoughts of championship glory will quickly fade, as the four gladiators aim for something much more vital....survival. [Finally the camera comes to rest on the ringside table where our esteemed presenters, Larry Van Keel and Rick "Precious" Perle are sitting. Larry has on a black suit jacket, and a light blue polo shirt. Rick has his long black hair tied back in a ponytail and is wearing a pompous grin on his weathered face. He has on a faded leather jacket, and white shirt. Their names flash at the bottom of the screen. Both men are looking past the camera, their necks craned upwards as they take in the hanging cage.] RP: Van Keel, in my long and successful career I fought in a lot of matches, and many of those were bloody and brutal. But I can say that none of them compared to what we can expect tonight when Hopper, Jordan, Extreme and Vanguard go to war in that cage. LVK: It indeed promises to be a memorable night Rick. It was just over two months ago that RCW's first supercard mega-event was held here at the Savvis Center, and of course on that occasion we saw Alex Extreme survive an eight-man one-night tournament to walk away as the very first National champion. He has held onto that belt ever since, but tonight will be by far his greatest test to date. RP: No question. Extreme has held onto the belt, but he hasn't had to defend it against two men at once before, and that's exactly what he faces tonight against Chris Hopper and Bryce Jordan, two men who he shares no lack of hatred for. LVK: Throw into that equation the fact that Extreme has to tag with Eric Vanguard, another of his most hated rivals, and the National champion faces a tough time holding onto his belt. However, as we just saw, Vanguard and Extreme now have a common interest in winning, so Hopper and Jordan have quite a battle on their hands. RP: So it's Vanguard who's been blackmailing Jim Catanzaro all these weeks? LVK: That's sure what it looked like. Vanguard seems to have some sort of photographs in his possession - photographs which Mr Catanzaro seems to want to get back real bad. I don't think I like the idea of a creep like Vanguard holding something over the RCW President. RP: Vanguard's only going after what he deserves. If he helps Extreme win tonight, then they have to go at it right afterwards, and Vanguard walks away with the belt. No problem. LVK: We'll see about that. On top of the Rage in the Cage match, we'll also be seeing every other RCW championship title on the line tonight. Light-Heavyweight champion Raya Oscura takes on Erik Jorgensen, Vlad Stukovski defends the Gateway title against two members of The Outfit, Vincenzo Sandora and Jason Blake, in a three-way match, and National tagteam champions the American Idols take on Team Canada and The Leading Men in another three-way match. There's also much more action..... RP: Yeah, like the Desert Death Match from Hell! That's the one I can't wait to see! LVK: Indeed. Two rugged southerners - Carson Nash and JD Laredo - will battle in a ring surrounded by barbwire, with cacti attached to the turnbuckles, and with a bullrope tied between the two of them. Add all of that together and you get one blood-filled massacre. RP: Great ain't it? LVK: Also in action tonight are Johnny Axis, Mr Honeydew II, Wildcat Jim Lewis jr, Chris Gotham, Michael White and many more. But right now, I'm being told that Alex Extreme is on his way to Jim Catanzaro's office, no doubt to discuss the revelation that Eric Vanguard will get a title shot tonight if he and Extreme win! Let's take a look.... [The camera opens to Jim Catanzaro's office. The door flies open and two security guards fall to the floor. Storming in behind them breathing fire is the RCW National Champion Alex Extreme. Catanzaro looks surprised, and tries to scamper away, as Extreme grabs him by the collar.] AE: Where the fk do you think you're going? JC: Extreme, if you so much as... AE: So much as what? Hurt you? Jimmy, I should do worse than hurt you right now. Unlike all the other nutcases here in RCW, I let you try to do your job and this is how you repay me? Defending the title twice in one night? I swear to God if I lose the title somehow tonight, you're gonna wish you never had a penis! [POP from the crowd in the arena, watching on the RiverTron.] AE: You think The Leading Men hurt you? Look at me Jimmy! I'm Alex Extreme - one of the most hardcore wrestlers in all the world. I can hurt you far worse than they can dream. Oh and Jimmy, suprise or no suprise, next Impact I'm gonna deal with you once and for all. Enjoy your last night among the living Mister President. [Extreme throws Catanzaro to the floor and storms out. POP!] [Cut back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: Well...the champion certainly doesn't appear too happy about Mr Catanzaro's constant changing of match stipulations. RP: Come on Van Keel, just say it. He's pissed off with Catanzaro's "games". That punkhead has been playing games since the day he started as RCW President. *You* know it, *I* know it, every damn one knows it. LVK: Well, I'll agree that Mr Catanzaro has seemed very eratic in his decision-making lately, but who can blame him if he is being manipulated by Eric Vanguard? This whole situation is very cloudly. Hopefully we'll see it all cleared up tonight. Well fans, it's time for the first match of Caged Rage! It pits Steve Douglas and Sean Cage against everybody's least favorite sports agent, Jerry Sneak, and his personal bodyguard Karl "Grizzly" Gammond. Before we cross to the ring, let's take a look at some of the background which led to this match..... [Cut to video package] [First we see comments made by Jerry Sneak - a medium sized man with big "Buddy Holly" style glasses and a walking stick - when he was first interviewed in the RCW ring during Impact on January 8.....] Jerry Sneak: I can't believe the utter trash I'm seeing. This place is filled with morons running around hitting each other with chairs and half naked women parading around like tramps. This is worse than Jerry Springer! [splice] Jerry Sneak: What annoys me the most is how these "wrestlers" parade around as if they're genuine "tough guys". Hell I bet none of them would last five minutes in a real fight. Any amateur boxer could wipe the floor with these losers. [splice] Jerry Sneak: None of these men in RCW are *real* athletes - most of them would never last 10 minutes on a football field or a basketball court. [Then it cuts into footage from the following Impact, on January 15.....] ["Death Rattle Shakes" by Pantera plays as Steve Douglas climbs into the ring for the first time in RCW.] LVK: STEVE DOUGLAS!! STEVE DOUGLAS is here in RCW!!! [Douglas points to his RCW T-shirt, as Sneak looks annoyed.] Steve Douglas: In case you can’t make it out… it says R...C...W!!! And in case you didn’t know, but you most likely do, the man behind this shirt is STEVE DOUGLAS!!! [splice] Steve Douglas: You say wrestlers aren’t athletes? Well a lot of guys backstage could outlast any football player in any activity you could name. [Next we cut to footage of the following week - January 22 - on Impact.] [Jerry Sneak stands in the ring with his bodyguard Karl "Grizzly" Gammond, a microphone in his hand.] JS: ...welcome the only man in the locker room EVER to play in a recognised professional organization and the newest addition to Team Sneak... .... "SUPERSTAR" SEAN CAGE!!! [Cut to Cage standing in the ring with Sneak. Cage also has a mic.] Cage: Mr. Sneak, let's get this straight. I never signed my name to anything. We never had a deal... [splice] Cage: ...from this point on I consider myself a free agent. Bidding begins NOW! [splice] JS: HEY! DON'T YOU DARE TURN YOUR BACK ON ME!!! [splice] LVK: Jerry Sneak's back up...AND HE HITS CAGE OVER THE HEAD WITH HIS WALKING STICK!!!! Cage goes down and Sneak and Gammond take full advantage of the situation!! [Sneak and Grizzly Gammond start kicking the fallen Cage, and boos echo around the arena until a figure runs towards the ring...] LVK: STEVE DOUGLAS!!!! STEVE DOUGLAS IS ON HIS WAY TO THE RING!!! [FACE POP as Douglas enters the ring and immediately Jerry Sneak and Grizzly Gammond high tail it out of there. The crowd continues to cheer as Douglas helps Cage to his feet. Sneak and Gammond stare at the two men in the ring as they cowardly make their way to the back.] [End video package] [Cut back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: That's the situation which led to this match, and I'm now being told that there's some sort of disturbance backstage which could affect this match! Let's take a look! [The shot reopens on a door, which has a sign reading "Sean Cage" on it. The door is slightly ajar, and a hand - presumably that of the cameraman - reaches out and pushes it open. The camera moves inside, immediately coming to focus on Cage, lying facedown on the cold concrete floor.] LVK: What's this? Somebody has laid out Sean Cage in his dressing room! RP: Ha ha! Good job! [As the camera moves in closer, we see the remnants of a broken cane lying across the top of Cage's back, as Cage remains unmoving.] LVK: Hey, that cane! That's exactly like the one Jerry Sneak uses! Sneak attacked Cage to keep him out of the match! RP: Well done Scooby Doo. [The screen fades back to ringside, and Larry and Rick.] LVK: I guess we should have known that Jerry Sneak would not want this tagteam match to go off as planned. He couldn't face having to step into the ring with two great wrestlers like Cage and Steve Douglas.... [The Fox Sports Net theme starts to play over the PA, and the crowd bursts into a pretty decent heel pop.] RP: Looks like the Sneak himself is on his way out.... [Cut to the ring.] __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / "Field of Extremes" tagteam match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ "Sports Guy" Jerry Sneak and Karl "Grizzly" Gammond TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ "Superstar" Sean Cage and Steve Douglas \________________________________________________________________ written by: Mark S RA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a Field of Extremes tagteam weapons match! [pop] [The camera pans around the ring, showing four plain black bags hanging from hooks on poles above the four corners.] RA: Hanging above the ring are four bags, each bag containing equipment from a different sport. If any competitor gets hold of the bag, he may use the equipment contained within. [The boos get louder as "The Sports Guy" Jerry Sneak appears at the entrance. He is dressed in a bright yellow amateur-style wrestling outfit, complete with yellow ear-guards, and clutches his infamous walking stick in the other. His trademark black "Buddy Holly"-style glasses adorn his face. Behind stands the hulking figure of Grizzly Gammond. Gammond is dressed in dark green wrestling tights and a University of Missouri football jersey.] RA: Introducing first, the team of..... ....JERRY SNEAK AND KARL "GRIZZLY" GAMMOND!!!!! LVK: Finally we get to see Jerry Sneak wrestle, or at least attempt to. RP: Tonight he's going to pay for all of the comments he made about wrestling and RCW. [Gammond holds open the ropes for Sneak, who climbs in. Both men stand center ring, Sneak with an indignant look on his face, and Gammond in a staunch bodyguard pose. Suddenly the lights begin to dim and “Death Rattle Shakes” by Pantera blasts over the speakers. A sudden barrage of red, black, blue and green strobe lights begin to flash through the arena.] #Numbing Rumble, Countless Medicines# #Depleted From - Years Of Abuse# #Death Rattle Shaking# #And There's No Faking, Undertaking# #Pressure Point, Rigor Mortis# #Inducing - Grasp Of Poison Hands# #Death Rattle Shaking# #From Years Of Compulsive Mistaking# RA: And their opponents...... .......STEVE DOUGLAS AND "SUPERSTAR" SEAN CAGE!!!! [Out of the entranceway walks Steve Douglas, wearing black tights with a white cobra on the backside, and a long leather trenchcoat.] #Death Rattle Shakes!!!!# #Death Rattle Shakes!!!!# #Disease Of Eyes, The Addict Blindfold# #Reduced To - The Realms Of Death# #Death Rattle Shaking# #Accumulating Life It's Taking# #Death Rattle Shakes# #Death Rattle Shakes# LVK: Well, it looks like Douglas is coming out by himself, which means that Sean Cage is obviously too injured to fight. Damn Sneak! [Douglas climbs into the ring, points at Sneak and offers a few unheard comments, and then turns and thrusts one fist in the air, getting a good pop from the fans.] RP: But hang on a minute Van Keel. Gammond is a green rookie, and Sneak couldn't fight his way out of a kindergarten, so maybe this match is actually pretty even now. *DING DING DING* LVK: Douglas and Gammond to start off....big surprise. [Douglas and Gammond step to the middle of the ring and are face to face. They glare at each other momentarily before locking up. Douglas is able to muscle Gammond into the corner. Douglas nails a knee to the gut followed by an elbow to the side of the head. Douglas grabs Gammond by the arm and whips him into the corner, the bag on top of the corner's pole shakes from the impact...] LVK: I can't WAIT until they get into those goodies.... RP: Goodies? They aren't pinatas....they hold instruments of pain. LVK: Exactly! I love a good bloodbath! [Douglas runs full speed towards Gammond but Gammond dives out of the way....a little too early...] RP: Douglas stops short! LVK: But he didn't make a grab! [Douglas is waiting for Gammond to get back to his feet. Gammond does so and slowly turns around....right into a big clothesline from Douglas that knocks him down to the mat. Douglas drops an elbow to the sternum, gets to his feet and drops another....] RP: Douglas knocks the former University of Missouri lineman down.....no easy task. LVK: Is it just me....or is every single wrestler a former football player? [Douglas rolls to his feet and begins walking towards the turnbuckle and more importantly, towards the bag of weapons. Gammond is slowly getting back to his feet however...] RP: Gammond is not an easy man to keep on the mat... [Gammond back on his feet now. Douglas is on the top turnbuckle. Gammond grabs Douglas by the tights but is met with a swift kick to the face that knocks him backwards. Douglas turns his attention back towards the bag of weapons and doesn't see Jerry Sneak running along the apron.....] RP: What's that little weasel doing? LVK: Obviously something...SNEAK-y. [Sneak runs full steam towards Douglas and hits a running....uhm....push that sends Douglas FLYING off the top rope and to the concrete. The momentum carries Douglas rolling hard into the guardrail...] RP: Damn it! That's just not fair! LVK: All's fair in love and wrestling. [Gammond gets back to his feet and rolls out of the ring. He picks up Douglas and sends him careening once again into the guardrail. Gammond peels Douglas off the guardrail and turns him around. Gammond picks Douglas up with relative ease and bodyslams him onto the hard concrete.] RP: Bodyslam onto that unforgiving concrete! [Gammond climbs back onto the apron and begins to scale the turnbuckle. Douglas slowly gets to a knee. Gammond is trying to scale the pole but is having quite a difficult time. Douglas is on his feet now, he sees Gammond nearing the bag of weapons and it seems to give him a slight surge of energy. Douglas gets onto the apron and is climbing up behind Gammond. Gammond reacts by swinging at Douglas with a punch but that only serves to weaken his grip on the pole and give Douglas the chance he needs to push Gammond off the pole to the mat....] LVK: Gammond was so close to the goody bag! RP: But Douglas made quick work of that....now Douglas is going for that bag of weapons once again.... [Jerry Sneak begins to run once again towards Douglas.....] LVK: Don't go to the well too many times Jerry! [This time Douglas turns before Sneak can get to him and Sneak stops running so quickly that his feet slide out from under him and he falls backfirst onto the apron and to the concrete. A large roar of laughter comes from the crowd. As Douglas nears towards the sack of weapons, the crowd begins to get behind him and start cheering him on. Douglas is able to grab the bag and the crowd pops in approval. Douglas drops to the top turnbuckle and empties the contents of the bag onto the mat....] RP: IT'S THE _FOOTBALL_ BAG!! [A football helmet, pads, and kicking tee drop to the mat. Douglas drops down to the mat.....] LVK: Think about it Rick....Grizzly is the guy who KNOWS how to use that equipment! RP: It's not a football game Larry....we're not going to see any punts or shotgun formations! [Douglas picks up the football helmet, just as Gammond gets to his feet. Douglas lifts up the football helmet, looking to take Gammond's head off but Sneak reachs in from the apron and grabs the football helmet. Douglas turns around and they begin a tug-of-war until Douglas smiles and lets go of the helmet, sending Sneak backwards off the apron and to the concrete. Douglas' smile doesn't last long however as Gammond grabs him from behind and nails a belly-to-back suplex....RIGHT ONTO THE FOOTBALL PADS!!] RP: Ouch! Those pads are NOT a soft landing place.....even though they may look like it. They are hardened plastic.. LVK: In reality....Douglas just landed from about 6 feet up onto a couple of big rocks. That's going to play havoc with his spinal alignment. RP: Spinal alignment? LVK: Spinal alignment. [Douglas rolls around the ring in pain. Gammond seems pleased with himself, he lifts Douglas to his feet and whips him to the ropes. Douglas rebounds and Gammond catchs him in a massive powerslam, pancaking Douglas to the mat. Gammond picks him up once again and this time Gammond runs towards the ropes......] RP: Grizzly Gammond showing his immense strength.... LVK: The guy is built like a brick sh- RP: Shouldertackle!! [Gammond with a move right out of his days of football as he throws his entire bodyweight into a flying shouldertackle to the chest of Douglas. Gammond stays on the ground and covers Douglas..... RP: There's a cover!! One............ Two............. Douglas kicks out! [Gammond gets back to his feet and walks over to the corner.....] LVK: Gammond ain't no cruiserweight.... RP: And that can only mean he is going up top for another bag of weapons! LVK: Douglas ain't getting up any time soon.... [Gammond slowly scales the pole to the bag of weapons and grabs it. Sliding back down the pole and than hopping off the top turnbuckle, Gammond opens up the bag, looks in and smiles....] LVK: What's he so happy about? [Gammond turns the bag upside down and out drop a hockey stick, goalie's mask, skates and a puck!] RP: THE _HOCKEY_ BAG!!! LVK: This is going to start getting interesting VERY soon!! [Gammond picks up the hockey stick and is about to get himself a slashing penalty but suddenly sees Jerry Sneak motioning that he wants to get tagged in....] RP: What an opportunist.... [Gammond tags out to Sneak, much to the crowd's dismay. Before exiting, Gammond attempts to hand Sneak the hockey stick but Sneak waves it off, holding up the football helmet that is still in his hand. Gammond shrugs his shoulders, drops the stick and exits the ring....] LVK: The "Sports Guy" is gonna do this his way! [Sneak drops the helmet and picks up the football pads....] RP: You've gotta be kidding me... [...and puts them on!] LVK: Haha!! Genius! Douglas can't hurt Sneak when he has football pads.... [Sneak picks up the football helmet and puts it on as well....] LVK: ...AND a football helmet on!! [Sneak walks over to Douglas' prone body and starts to stomp on him. They don't seem to serve much effect other than waking Douglas up, as he begins to get to his feet. Sneak stomps Douglas harder but Douglas continues to get up, as if he doesn't even feel the kicks.] RP: Sneak....isn't very strong. LVK: Good thing he is decked out in that football gear! [Douglas gets to his feet. Sneak hits the panic button and quickly grabs the hockey stick off the ground. Douglas turns around. Sneak takes a swing at him but Douglas catchs the stick in his hand before it hits him. With a quick flick of the wrist, Douglas yanks the stick from Sneak's hand....] LVK: Uh oh... [Sneak turns to run towards Gammond but Douglas simpily sticks the curved edge of the stick around in front of Sneak's legs. Sneak doesn't notice and begins to run, he trips and falls flat on his face causing the crowd to burst into laughter. The football helmet seems to shield Sneak's face as he quickly crawls over to his corner and tags in Gammond....] RP: Somehow I get the feeling Sneak isn't going to be wrestling much tonight. [Gammond gets into the ring and noticing Douglas with the hockey stick, decides to get a weapon of his own and picks up one of the hockey skates!] LVK: Those blades look like they were just sharpened.... RP: Very dangerous weapons.... [Gammond and Douglas slowly approach each other. Gammond makes the first move and swings with the skate, blade first, at Douglas. Douglas blocks it with the hockey stick, causing a few splinters of wood to fly out from the stick. Gammond swings again but Douglas blocks once again. This time the blade gets lodged partially in the stick and Gammond loses his grip on it. Douglas drops the hockey stick and lands a quick punch on Gammond. Douglas whips Gammond to the ropes and lands a swift kick to the gut....] LVK: Now was there a penalty there or not? [Douglas moves the doubled over Gammond until his back is facing the corner, he scissors the head into a powerbomb/piledriver position and lifts him up....] RP: There's no place to land!! [...and powerbombs him into the corner!!] LVK: Ouch! That had to hurt.... [Douglas leaves Gammond slumped in the corner and moves to the center of the ring. Douglas runs at Gammond and hits a running knee to the gut. Gammond slumps down in the corner. Douglas begins to climb up the pole, very politely using Gammond's head as a stepping stone.....] RP: Douglas is going for another bag of weapons...as if we didn't have enough already!! LVK: This just keeps getting better! [Douglas grabs the bag of weapons just as Gammond is getting to his feet. Douglas drops down to the top turnbuckle, and sees Gammond on his feet in the middle of the ring. Douglas reachs into the bag and pulls out....] RP: A BASKETBALL! [Douglas drops the bag to the mat, takes aim...and promptly beans Gammond in the head with the basketball, causing the crowd once again to burst out in laughter, and causing Gammond to stumble forward into the opposite turnbuckle. Sneak can be seen going over to the corner and handing something to Gammond as Douglas has his back turned, climbing down the turnbuckle. Sneak retreats as Douglas turns around....] RP: Douglas didn't see Sneak hand Gammond whatever it is he handed to him.... LVK: They don't call him Sneak for nothing.... [Douglas reachs into the bag he dropped and pulls out the basketball hoop.....] RP: That hoop may look funny as a weapon but you are talking about galvanized steel! LVK: Yes...and we all know galvanized steel is no laughing matter, professor. RP: Shut up Larry. [Douglas walks over to Gammond and grabs him by the shoulder with one hand, but Gammond spins around, swinging at Douglas. Douglas instinctively throws the basketball hoop up to protect himself, lucky he did as Gammond was swinging with the pointed end of the kicking tee, from the football bag....] RP: My god! Gammond could have killed Douglas! That spike is NOT a blunt object! LVK: Thank the lord for galvanized steel! RP: .... [The impact causes Gammond to drop the tee and allows Douglas to put the hoop around Gammond's neck. Douglas yanks on the hoop and throws Gammond over in a hip-toss like fashion. Douglas eyes the kicking tee and an evil gleam crosses his eyes. Douglas picks up the kicking tee, looks at Gammond and a sadistic smile crosses his face.....] LVK: Steve Douglas is about to do something evil...very very evil.... RP: I have to agree with you...and if Gammond is still conscious he would be very smart to RUN! [Douglas lifts Gammond into a sitting position, stands behind him and with his free hand cradles his chin, tilting his head up slightly. Douglas lifts the kicking tee up above his head....] Crowd: OOHHH!!!!! RP: GOOD GOD!!!! [....and brings it down HARD, point first into Gammond's head. Gammond yells out in pain but Douglas doesn't let him go, instead he brings the kicking tee above his head once again and drives it into Gammond's head once more. Gammond flails his legs wildly but Douglas STILL doesn't let him go! Douglas drives the kicking tee into Gammond's head once more before letting him go. Gammond rolls around the ring in pain, a crimson mask quickly developing over his face....] LVK: We have the first blood shed here tonight! RP: Somehow...I don't think it's going to be the last....Douglas is SICK! [Douglas lifts the bloodied Gammond, and Douglas runs to the ropes but Sneak, grabbing onto the top rope, drops down, causing Douglas to flip over to the concrete....] RP: Sneak lowbridged Douglas! LVK: That was all Douglas' fault...he ran towards Sneak and Sneak acted in self defense! RP: Right.... [Douglas clutchs his ribs, which took the brunt of the impact. Sneak runs into the ring and helps him up....Sneak points to the last bag of weapons, Gammond nods his head and walks towards the turnbuckle. Pausing to wipe some blood from his eyes, Gammond proceeds to climb up the turnbuckles and than up the pole....] RP: By process of elimination...that bag is full of BASEBALL equipment and you know what that means.... LVK: Double header? RP: NO! BASEBALL BAT!!! [Douglas is on his feet now and he sees Gammond, who has just grabbed onto the sack of weapons. Douglas rolls into the ring, causing Sneak to promptly get the hell out of Dodge, sliding out the opposite side of the ring. Douglas grabs the basketball hoop and quickly climbs up behind Gammond. Gammond feels him climbing and tries to turn around but before he can, Douglas wraps the basketball hoop around his neck once again. Douglas turns so he is back to back with Gammond, still holding onto the basketball hoop....] RP: No way.... [HUGE crowd pop as Douglas leaps off the top rope, and hits a neckbreaker using the basketball hoop!!] RP: HOLY GOOD LORD IN HEAVEN!!! A NECKBREAKER OFF THE TOP ROPE USING THAT BASKETBALL HOOP!!! [Douglas throws the basketball hoop away, crawls over Gammond and hooks a leg....] RP: THIS HAS TO BE OVER!!!! ONE...................... TWO...................... THREE?!!?!? NNOOO!!! GAMMOND JUST BARELY KICKED OUT IN TIME!!! LVK: That was _CLOSE_! [Douglas can't believe that didn't put Gammond away but he gets back to his feet and picks up the baseball bag. Douglas turns it upside down, spilling the contents out onto the mat; a baseball bat, a catcher's mask and a base. He doesn't see however, Gammond slowly rolling to his knees....] RP: Douglas better pay attention to his opponent.... [Gammond grabs another hockey skate. Douglas picks up the baseball bat just as Sneak climbs up onto the apron and gets Douglas' attention. Douglas grabs Sneak by the neck and holds the baseball bat up to his head in a threatening manner....] LVK: Gammond is up and he has that hockey skate in his hands!!! [Douglas decides to spare Sneak's life and tosses him off the apron. Gammond raises the skate, blade facing Douglas, above his head...waiting for him to turn around. Douglas does so.....] RP: JESUS!! LVK: What football coach taught him THAT move?!!? [Gammond drives the skate edge first into Douglas' forehead, dropping him to the mat. Amazingly, this does not draw blood which seems to be Gammond's plan as he grabs Douglas by the head and begins grinding the skate's blade into his forehead!!] RP: THIS IS DISGUSTING!!! LVK: NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL _BLADING!!!_ [Indeed, as Douglas is now busted wide open. Gammond stops grinding the blade against Douglas' forehead. Gammond picks up the goalie masks, puts it on Douglas' face and nails a huge stomp onto the mask...] LVK: Douglas might need some plastic surgery after that! RP: I'm amazed Gammond isn't PARALYZED after that neckbreaker from the top rope....that was an amazing move. [Sneak is now yelling for Gammond to tag him in once again, as Gammond takes the goalie mask off of Douglas...] RP: Sneak wants in now that Douglas is down! Big surprise there!! LVK: He is a genius! It's called psychological warfare!! [Gammond stands up and tags Sneak in. Sneak gets in the ring, still in full football gear and grabs the baseball bat out of Douglas' hand. Douglas begins to slowly get to his feet and as he does, Sneak drives the baseball bat into his gut, doubling him over. Sneak drops the baseball bat and scissors Douglas' head in a powerbomb position....] RP: Please don't tell me he's going to try this.... [Sneak attempts to lift Douglas, but to nobody's surprise it doesn't work. He tries again but still no dice. 3rd time....it's not a charm. Douglas backbody drops Sneak over the top rope....right into the waiting arms of Gammond!!] LVK: Gammond caught his boss and saved him from getting hurt! [Gammond drops Sneak on his feet and the ref is saying that Gammond catching Sneak was a legal tag. Gammond gets into the ring, as Sneak hurriedly gets out, Douglas is still hurt from the baseball bat to the gut. Gammond grabs Douglas but Douglas spins around and NAILS Gammond in the face with the catcher's mask!!] RP: Douglas was playing possum!! LVK: I didn't even notice him grab the catcher's mask! [Gammond reels backwards, he charges Douglas only to be met with a kick to the gut. Douglas drags Gammond over to the base. Douglas scissors Gammond's head, lifts him up....and PILEDRIVER!!!!] RP: DOUGLAS PILEDRIVES GAMMOND ONTO THE BASE!! LVK: Douglas steals first! [Douglas gets up and turns towards Sneak to a huge crowd pop! But Gammond is getting up, leaving a large splatter of blood on the base...] RP: Gammond is getting up!?!? LVK: Gammond may be getting up....but I don't think he even knows what state he's in! [Gammond seems to be out on his feet and makes a weak grab on Douglas, Douglas spins around with a clothesline that takes Gammond right out of his boots. Douglas bends down, and in obvious pain, lifts Gammond back to his feet. Douglas backs Gammond to the ropes and punchs him in the head a few times to make sure he stays there.] RP: Douglas has a scheme going... [Douglas picks up the plastic goalie mask and puts it on Gammond's face. Douglas picks up the baseball bat, gets into position and does a Babe Ruth style point with the baseball bat....right at Gammond's face....] RP: Oh....MY....._GOD_!!!! LVK: NO! SOMEBODY HAS TO STOP HIM!!! SECURITY!!! RP: GAMMOND'S CAREER IS ABOUT TO BE ENDED RIGHT HERE!!!! [Sneak is screaming for Douglas not to do it, but Douglas has all his attention focussed on Gammond, who is still out on his feet. Douglas plants his feet, "adjusts" himself and than takes a MASSIVE SWING RIGHT INTO GAMMOND'S FACE!!!!] LVK: HOLY *BLEEP*!!!! HOMERUN!!!! RP: GAMMOND IS DEAD!!! HE HAS TO BE!!! [The impact from the homerun shot to Gammond's face sends Gammond right over the top rope and to the concrete. The crowd is in a frenzy as it's quite obvious Gammond will not be getting up for a long...._LONG_ time!] RP: We need some medical help out here RIGHT NOW!! [The same sadistic smile crosses the face of Steve Douglas as he turns once again towards Jerry Sneak. Still holding onto the baseball bat, Douglas grabs Sneak with one hand and yanks him over the top rope, flipping him over onto the mat. Douglas once again gets into a swinging position...] LVK: Douglas is going for two homeruns in one game!!! [All of a sudden, there is a face pop as "Superstar" Sean Cage is seen limping down towards the ring. Douglas sees him and waits for Cage to get into the ring...] LVK: What's that gimpy punkhead doing down here?! RP: He wants a piece of the action! [HUGE face pop as Cage holds his hand out towards Douglas, motioning that HE wants to take Sneak out!] RP: Cage wants to be the one to take Sneak out!! [Douglas smiles, nods and gives Cage the baseball bat. Cage takes a batter's stance and waits for Sneak to get up....] RP: Sneak is going to die! [Sneak gets to his knees....] LVK: Poor lil' Jerry! [Sneak gets to his feet....] RP: This is going to be UGLY! [Sneak turns around....] *SMACK*!!!! RP: WHAT?!?!?! LVK: NO WAY!! HAHA!!! [Cage turns around and BLASTS Douglas right in the head with the baseball bat!!! Douglas falls to the mat. Sneak slides out of the ring as Cage proceeds to beat the holy hell out of Douglas with shots to the gut from the baseball bat. Sneak slides back into the ring, briefcase in hand. Cage stops beating Douglas and turns to Sneak as he opens the briefcase to reveal....A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY!!!! Cage smiles...AND SHAKES JERRY SNEAK'S HAND!!] RP: Sean Cage has _SOLD_ _OUT!!!_ LVK: IT'S ALL ABOUT THE BENJAMINS BABY!!! [Cage turns to Douglas, picks him up and.....] LVK: THE SLAM JAM!!!! RP: As if the baseball bat wasn't enough?!? [Sneak drops down and covers Steve Douglas as the crowd is in a near riot, throwing various pieces of trash into the ring and booing like mad......] RP: This is disgusting..... ONE....................... TWO...................... THREE!!!!!! LVK: JERRY SNEAK HAS PINNED STEVE DOUGLAS!!! RA: The winners of the match...."SPORTS GUY" JERRY SNEAK AND GRIZZLY GAMMOND!!!! [The crowd is deafening with boos....] RP: I'm going to puke.... [Sneak and Cage celebrate like they've just won the Super Bowl, jumping around and thrusting their arms into the air.] LVK: We need some medical help for Steve Douglas right now, and for Karl Gammond for that matter. This was a *very* brutal match, and the night has JUST BEGUN! Let's head backstage now to Randy Blackstone..... [The camera cuts to Randy Blackstone standing next to RCW Champion Alex Extreme. Blackstone is wearing a blue denim shirt and black pants.] RB: Alex... [Extreme gives him a funny look.] AE: Um, who are you? RB: Randy Blackstone. [Extreme still looks puzzled.] AE: You work here? RB: Yeah. AE: I thought Lindsey does this? RB: We both do but I'm better. AE: Yeah? Well she's prettier and has a nicer rack. What the hell do you want? RB: Well what about what Vanguard's done? AE: Right now, I couldn't give a damn if King Kong came after me. I'm the champ and they're not. In the end, they all have to come and take it away from me and for that I wish them luck and hope they've made their funeral arrangements. [POP! Yep, the fans are watching on the RiverTron.] RB: Okay well what about what's happening with Young and Gotham? They're both your friends, yet they can't seem to get along. AE: Look, it's just a small spat. All will be fine after tonight. RB: You can't be serious. AE: No, I can't because I'm Alex Extreme so my name isn't serious. However what I am is tired of these silly ass questions. Those two have been my friends ever since Dan Kauffman trained me in Canada. I'm glad both of them are here. I just wish they'd stop fighting. RB: Any final thoughts before stepping into the Rage in the Cage tonight? AE: Yeah, no matter what Catanzaro, Vanguard, Jordan, or Hopper do, I will walk out of St. Louis still RCW champion. I don't care what little suprise Jimmy's got cooked up, nobody is leaving this building with the RCW title but me because I'm Alex Extreme and they're not. It's just.... [The crowd chants along with him.] AE: ..... _THAT_ simple. [The camera cuts to another backstage scene. "The Fantasy" Brett Young is shown drinking a bottle of water at the refreshment table. Young, wearing an open black leather jacket and midnight blue pants, is seen just looking over his "options" at the table. From a far shot, a man is shown running down the hall waving his arms yelling "BRENT! BRENT!" As he gets closer, we see him wearing a turquoise bandana, a UEW Alex Extreme shirt, and black rip offs. The man is Chris Gotham. Gotham stops to catch his breath, grabs Young's water and takes a sip before smiling and handing it back to him... ] CG: "Brent! Brent! There you are, I've been looking all over this arena for you, you look good man, is that a new tie? " [Bret has an irrated look on his face.] BY: "Chris for as old as you say you are you sure can act like a complete child sometimes. Makes me feel almost bad for what is going to happen tonight. ALMOST I said Chris. So what the hell do you want since you opened your loud mouth?" CG: Bret.. Oh yeah. Heh, I was in a stable with you what three years ago, why haven't you ever corrected me on that? Silly me. Anyway man, I was thinking over some things, and you know.. Well, since I'm a good friend of Alex, and you are a good friend of Alex, I say we put our main focus on Alex. Think about it, how selfish are we, worrying about a little pity dispute between us, Alex has to _FOCUS_ on keeping his belt, I say we go out there, and announce to the crowd we put all of this behind us, and that our match is a no contest, wacha say Bretness? BY: Look buddy, I've been looking out for Alex for 5-plus years now. I have been leading him away from bad news like you since day one. There is no way in hell I am going to let a great guy like Alex get mislead by a complete jack-off like yourself Chris. So you can get that through your head RIGHT now! CG: Hmmm, maybe later. But look, what good is a "wrestling" match? Who cares. How about we play a game of pin the tail on the donkey, whoever wins, wins? BY: You see Chris, you can talk the talk. You are DAMN good at that. However you are stepping into something you have NO clue about. Alex and I go back almost 6 years in this business. Did you hear that Chris! 6 LONG HARD YEARS! Jerk offs like you have came and gone, however our friendship stood together stronger then steel. So before you think that you are going to step in between something you have no clue about. You better think again! CG: Bret, look bud. We've been friends a long time too right? Remember? Like that one time, God it was fun. Anyway, look.. Let's put all this crap behind us, we won't say you were wrong, and we won't say that Bret was wrong, what we will say is that it's all done with. Look, I'll even trade you nicknames. You can take my cool, innovative 'The Original Bad Boy" name! I'll take your old, used up, lame "The Fantasy" name.. What do you say? [Bret gives his usual lady killer smile.] CG: Alright then! [GOTHAM STICKS OUT HIS HAND!] Young: Like you said we will leave it at that. No hand shakes nothing. Just a one on one in the ring. After that we will see where our paths take us. CG: Bret!! I mean, let it slide. There is no need for silly violence. I'm a referee, I don't wrestle! BY: Gotham I don't play your games. Like I said AFTER our one on one in the ring. Then we will see. CG: Fine Bret, Break Alex's heart, just fine! [Gotham turns around and walks away..] Young: Never trust Chris Gotham... NEVER! [Gotham turns back and attempts to nail Young with a double Ax handle, but Young turns around quickly and nails Gotham with a hard left hand, sending Gotham down hard. Bret walks away as Gotham holds his face.] [Cut back to Larry and Rick at ringside.] RP: I tell ya Van Keel, I like Gotham. He's a sneaky SOB, and I like that. LVK: Alex Extreme didn't seem too worried about the friction between his two good friends, but it must be eating him up inside. Here he is, facing one of the toughest matches of his career, and his mind is distracted by this business. RP: I think Extreme should just stay friends with whoever wins out of Young and Gotham, and disown the loser. Law of the jungle. LVK: The jungle? The place where.... [Wait for it.] LVK: .....you're gonna die? [Both men giggle.] RP: Um, yeah...like I was saying, Extreme oughta pick the winner and turn his back on the loser. LVK: That's a bit harsh Rick. Alex has been friends with both men for many years, and you can't just severe ties like that in an instant. Well fans, it's time for Gotham and Young to settle their differences in the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Singles match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ "Original Bad Boy" Chris Gotham TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ "The Fantasy" Brett Young \________________________________________________________________ written by: Dave S RA: The following match is schedule for one fall. Introducing first..... ......."ORIGINAL BAD BOY" CHRIS GOOOOOOOOOTHAAAMMM!!!!! [3 Libras by A Perfect Circle plays, as "Original Bad Boy" Chris Gotham walks out, stands at the entrance and smirks. The crowd greets the torquoise and black clad Gotham with a smattering of boos. Gotham takes a step up, and with his hand taps his fingers against his chest, and then gives a thumbs up.] LVK: This crowd showing what they think of Chris Gotham here! RP: Who cares what these punkheads think, Van Keel? [Gotham then walks down the aisle, jumps up on the apron, grabs the top rope and peaks his head underneath it. Gotham then steps through the ropes jumps up on the second turnbuckle, and waits....] LVK: We'll just see how confident Chris Gotham is when he has to- [Van Keel is interrupted, as "Hemoglobin" by Placebo begins to play over the loud speakers as the lights dim and blue and silver lights swirl slowly over the crowd. The curtains are pulled back after a moment and "The Fantasy" Brett Young steps out into the aisle way, A open black leather jacket with "THE FANTASY" in bright green on the back and midnight blue pants with silver FANTASY written down the sides.] RA: And his opponent...... ......"THE FANTASY" BRETT YOOOOOOUUUUUUNNGGGG!!!!!! [Young holds his arms out to his side about waist level looking over the crowd. He holds his head high walking towards the ring. He reaches out to slaps the fan's hands on the way to the ring. He steps into the ring and raises his arms in the air as the crowd greets him with cheers. He then turns ready for the bell.] LVK: This one should be hot, folks..and we're under way! The Battle of Alex Extreme's Friends as- [Van Keel is once again interrupted, as a voice bellows over the PA System, "You a Fan?" The crowd begins to murmer, as "Box Office" Tripp Shade appears from behind the curtain, in street clothes. "Lost at C" by Canibus echoes throughout the jam-packed arena, as Shade makes his way down to ringside.] LVK: What is HE doing here!? RP: Who cares, Van Keel! It's not often you get to be in the presence of such a fine Hollywood Superstar! LVK: It's even rarer that I get to be in the presence of someone that's more out-of-touch than you, Rick. [Young and Gotham just sorta stand around looking at Shade, as he makes his way to the announce position. Shade takes a seat next to Rick, and puts on a headset. The ref rings the bell, and the action gets under way.] LVK: Tripp Shade...what brings you out here at this time? Shouldn't you be in the back preparing for your match here tonight? TS: Ah, Larry.....it's a pleasure to talk to me, I'm sure. Hiya, Rick. I'm simply out here to add my own personal insight to this match. 'Sides....with all due respect... this announce crew is in DIRE need of someone to spice it up. Especially with THIS match. LVK: Hmm...with that said, collar-and-elbow tie up now, in the center of the ring, and this one is underway. Gotham with control. Whip into the ropes. Young coming back. Leapfrog. Young puts on the brakes. Dropkick by "The Fantasy", and down goes Gotham! [Gotham gets back to his feet quickly, and dusts himself off. He motions for Young to lock up again.] LVK: Another lock up and-OH! Rake to the eyes by Gotham! And a low blow! What is he doing? RP: What's the pro- TS: Allow me, Rick. Ya see, Van Keel, Gotham, who, by the way, I loathe, is trying to establish himself as a mat technician. It's fairly obvious to me. Right, Rick? RP: Indeedarooni! TS: Ha...I love that. LVK: Oh puleeze... I'm not sure if I'm gonna be able to make it through this match with you two. [Gotham kicks Young a few times in the kidneys, before getting admonished by the referee. Gotham holds his hands up in an "I'm completely innocent" manner. The ref turns around, and Gotham kicks Young again in the kidneys.] LVK: What is Gotham's deal here tonight? RP: He's obvi- TS: Rick..if I may. Van Keel, he's obviously turning it up a notch for "Caged Rage". Me thinks >YOU< could take a few notes from Gotham, and maybe step up YOUR performance for once. RP: Indeedaroni! LVK: Ugh.... Gotham now lifting Young to his feet. Whip into the ropes....Big powerslam by Gotham!! Hooks the leg! 1!! 2!! Thr- No! Our first pin of the contest yields a two count. Gotham really dominating in the early going. TS: Who is this Brett Young fella, anyway? LVK: He's one of the brightest shining stars in wrestling, Mr. Shade. TS: Has he ever had lunch with Emmanuel Lewis, Lar? LVK: I....I don't know. TS: I rest my case. LVK: Oh, look at Gotham now! Posing over Young-WAIT! ROLL UP BY YOUNG!! 1!!! 2!!! 3-NO!! Young with a roll-up outta no where! That woulda served Gotham right! [The near-pin by Young gets the first crowd reaction of the match, and also buys Young a few moments to get back on his feet.] TS: Young has to keep on his toes here, now, guys. It's obvious Gotham's decided he's gonna try to win by any means neccesary. He really needs to stick and move here. LVK: Whoa.... actual wrestling insight, Tripp? TS: Van Keel, when it comes to Tripp Shade, it's not all just high-priced clothing, and low-class tail. Errr...we can edit that out in post-preduction, right? LVK: We're live, Mr. Shade. TS: ....... LVK: Brett Young with a European uppercut, knocking Gotham back. And another one, and Gotham is wobbly! One more sends Gotham against the turnbuckle! [Young quickly follows Gotham in, and hops up on the second turnbuckle. He holds a fist in the air, visually asking the crowd if they want him to beat on Gotham. They reply with a hearty yell, so "The Fantasy" begins laying into Gotham's face, as the crowd counts along, happily.] LVK: Repeated punches to Gotham's face! TS: Ugh... what a blatant cheater. If I was the ref, I'd call for the bell. LVK: Oh PULEEZE! RP: He's got a point, y'know, Van Keel. LVK: Seven! Eight! Ni-OH!! GOTHAM REVERSES INTO A SPINEBOMB! [Mid-punch, Gotham puts his hands under Young's armpits, and drives him to the mat in a Spinebuster/Powerbomb, hooking the legs.] 1!!! 2!!! 3-NO!! That was close!! TS: That was pretty freakin' nift. [Gotham holds onto the legs, and gets to his feet. He crosses Young's leg over his knee, and attempts to turn him over.] LVK: Gotham now, going for a Texas Cloverleaf..... TS: Heeeeeey, that's >MY< move! LVK: Trying to...turn.....him...........over!! He's got it applied! TS: Well, hell, I'll be the first to tell you, once that move's applied...this match, unlike a certain Lizard King, is over now. I'm gonna beat the traffic. See ya, Rick. [Shade tosses down his headset, as Young reaches valiantly(no pun intended) for the ropes. Before Tripp can even leave the broadcast table, however, Young manages to reach the bottom ring rope, causing the ref to admonish Gotham to release the hold. Shade puts his headset back on.] TS: Psh... I forgot.. only >I< know how to properly lock on a Texas Cloverleaf. [Gotham, like any good heel, keeps the submission hold on up to 4.9999 of the ref's 5 count. Gotham releases the hold, and once again, holds up his hands in an "I'm innocent" manner.] LVK: Oh, he's just SO innocent. Please! TS: Your bias is REALLY a turn-off, Van Keel. Try and call this bad-boy down the middle, k? Jeezo.... LVK: .......I'll ask you not to tell me how to do my job, thank you. Gotham has really dominated thus far here tonight, against Young. TS: That's what happens when you care about the people. Especially the people here in ugh.. St. Louis. LVK: Gotham now, rolls to the outside. What's this now? [Gotham shoo's the time keeper off of his chair. Gotham picks it up, folds it, and slides back into the ring.] LVK: Wait a minute now! He can't do that! TS: Apparently he can, Lar. [Gotham rears back over his head with both hands, and begins to swing towards an unsuspecting Young....when the ref grabs the chair from Gotham.] LVK: No sir! Referee saves the day!! Gotham was gonna way lay Brett Young with that chair! [Gotham begins to give the ref a piece of his mind. Meanwhile, Young sneaks up from behind....] LVK: FANTASIZE!! TS: Waaaaaaay ahead of you. See that blonde in row 2- LVK: Huh?...No! Brett Young's Version of the Cobra Clutch applied!!! [Gotham's arms begin flailing about wildly.] LVK: This could do it!! Referee checks Gotham's arm!! [It goes up....and down!] LVK: Again!! Referee checks the a-Ooops TS: OWWWWW!!!! [As Gotham's arm falls again, Shade lets out a giant yelp of pain, as Van Keel, caught up in the excitement of the matter, spills his hot coffee on Shade's lap.] LVK: Ooops...... RP: Nice going, Van Keel. [Gotham's hand is raised again....and he manages to keep it up. He then drops on his ass, bringing Young down in an odd Ace-Crusher type manuever.] TS: Ugh...Van Keel, you've just caught my groin on fire! LVK: What a counter-eh? TS: Err......HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO ADD INSIGHT TO A MATCH, WHEN THE FLESH ON MY BATHING SUIT AREA IS ON FIRE!?! Damn you, Van Keel! [Shade tosses down the headset, and walks awkwardly to the back.] LVK: What was that about? RP: Nice going, Larry. LVK: He didn't belong out here anyway...the referee starts the manditory ten count as both men lay motionless on the mat! RP: I don't see this match continuing, Van Keel. Double countout, it HAS to be! Referee Marc Gioffre: ONE! TWO! LVK: No movement. RP: It's all over. RMG: THREE! FOUR! LVK: Young is starting to stir! RP: He's got to be on something illegal! LVK: Gotham moving as well! RMG: FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! LVK: Gotham on a knee! Young using the ropes to get to his feet! RMG: EIGHT! LVK: Gotham is up and moving towards a staggering Brett Young! [Young staggers back into the waiting arms of Chris Gotham. Gotham applies a full nelson, then drops flat, driving the back of Young's head into the mat.] LVK: Good Lord! Young's head just bounced off the mat! [Young rolls to his stomach, clutching the back of his head in pain. Gotham turns and executes a standing moonsault onto the lower back of Brett Young.] RP: Geez Van Keel, I'm not so sure Young is going to be able to walk when this is all over. LVK: That was a very insightful comment, Rick. RP: I'd say something that brings my evilness back into view, but I really can't think of anything. LVK: Intention noted. [Young gets to his hands and knees slowly, Gotham standing over him. Gotham steps back, then repeatedly fires kicks into the rib, back, and kidney areas of Brett Young.] LVK: Chris Gotham is kicking Brett Young over and over again! The brutality of this recent turn is unheard of! RP: What?! He's kicking him. Big deal! LVK: Big deal?! He's... [Young finally manages to grab the foot of Chris Gotham and trips him up. Gotham falls against referee Marc Gioffre, their heads colliding. Once again, both men lay motionless on the mat, only this time, there's no referee to count them down.] LVK: All three men are laid out in the ring! What's going to happen?! What are they going to do next?! RP: Well...they're probably going to just sort of lay there. [Chris Gotham rolls to the outside to regain his composure. Young follows him out and begins dropping forearms to the back of Gotham.] LVK: Young now has Chris Gotham by the arm and whips him hard into the ringpost. Young following in now, he has Gotham by the hair... [Gotham gives him a low blow, crumpling him to the floor.] RP: OOH, no little Brett Youngs in our lifetime, thank God. [Gotham kicks the staircase out away from the ring and drags Young over by it.] LVK: What's Gotham doing here? RP: I don't know...I don't know if I like it... [Gotham steps up onto the free-standing staircase with Brett Young, standing on the second stair with Young on the third. Gotham places him in a standing headscissors and looks around at the jeering crowd.] LVK: Oh my God, he's not going to... [Gotham lifts Young up in a piledriver position.] RP: HOLY CRAP! LVK: Someone stop this! I can't watch... [Gotham leaps up and drives Young's head into the bottom stair with a huge CLANG! The crowd stops all noise and looks on in shocked silence as Gotham clutches his lower back and Young lays, unmoving.] LVK: This is brutal! This is unnecessary! Blood is cascading down Brett Young's face! Someone PLEASE stop this match! [Gotham recovers well ahead of Young and rolls him into the ring. The official begins to stir as Gotham grabs Young's arm and watches it drop lifelessly to the mat. Referee Marc Gioffre begins to slowly rise.] LVK: Chris Gotham is just adding insult to injury now! He's crossed Young's arms behind Young's own back and has placed his knees in the wrists! RP: I'm not sure I've seen this move before. Usually I'd love this, but Brett Young is hurt too badly. [Gotham grasps Young's chin and pulls back, completeing the crossed-arm camel clutch. The official shakes his head clear while Gotham pulls back on the hold.] LVK: Mark Gioffre is checking Brett Young...he couldn't possibly respond... RP: He didn't. Gioffre's calling for the bell. [DING DING DING] RA: Your winner, CHRIS GOTHAM! [The crowd boos as Gotham starts jumping around, celebrating.] LVK: The way he acts, you'd think this had been a respectable win. RP: Well...a win IS a win. [Gotham rolls out of the ring and grabs a black bag. He climbs back into the ring with it and opens it up. He pulls out two party hats, placing one on his head and one on Young's as the official goes to check on him.. He grabs a handful of streamers and a bottle of champagne. Gotham throws the streamers everywhere as he pops the cork into the air and drinks straight from the bottle.] RP: ...OK, maybe this IS a bit much... LVK: This is disgusting... [The crowd stands and pops as Alex Extreme walks through the curtain and down to the ring. The look on his face isn't a happy one, and he keeps his eyes on Young. He makes it to the ring and climbs in. Gotham spots him and attempts to jump into his arms. Extreme simply shrugs him off and goes to check on Young. Gotham shrugs and leaves the ring, still celebrating wildly.] LVK: Alex Extreme obviously didn't appreciate that display either! He's ignored Chris Gotham to check on his friend Brett Young! Well, it's time for us to take a break, but before we do, we're heading back to Randy Blackstone again.... [Cut to backstage, where Randy Blackstone is once again standing in front of a large RCW logo. Next to him is the figure of young RCW newcomer "Devastating" Damon Knight. Knight, a handsome, muscle-bound African-American, is wearing a plain white t-shirt and jeans. He smiles arrogantly.] Blackstone: I'm here with one of the newest prospects here in RCW, Damon Knight. Now Damon, word has it that you're not the most popular guy in the lockerrooms because of some comments you made on an internet wrestling site recently..... Knight: Well, you know what? I-OOPH! [Knight's words are cut off by a swift punch to the jaw, as a third figure comes flying into shot. The buzz-cut blond hair give it away instantly - Jesse "the Avenger" Ewiak!] Blackstone: HEY! [Ewiak connects with another punch, which sends Knight crashing back into the logo, causing the large board it is attached to, to fall over and crash to the floor. This reveals a cavernous backstage area, mostly concrete with the odd table and stack of stuff. Ewiak drags Knight to his feet by his hair, and leads him off to the left, and the camera follows the action.] Blackstone: Come on! Stop this! [A soda machine, with the brandname "Splurge" on it, comes into shot, and Ewiak sends Knight crashing headfirst into the front of it.] *BA-DONK!* [Knight staggers away, but then stuns Ewiak with a punch to the face, and then sends the Avenger facefirst into a table full of RCW merchandise. He picks up a replica title belt and smashes it into Ewiak's face. He tries for a second shot, but Ewiak blocks it, and drives Knight's face into a box of merchandise, including action figures. Suddenly several security men rush in and break them up, fighting to keep the two apart.] Knight: Ewiak - you're dead meat! [Fade back to Rick and Larry.] LVK: Ewiak and Knight have had a war of words going for weeks now, and they've hooked it up in the ring a couple of times as well. But by the looks of things their animosity is far from settled. RP: I thought Knight was pretty cool, but then he went and criticised RCW on that internet website. You don't like it here? Then leave you no-talent punkhead! LVK: Exactly. We really need to take a break. Stay tuned for more CAGED RAGE!!! [Cut to commercials] [The camera returns to Rick and Larry, then does a quick pan of the crowd and ring. Suddenly the RiverTron bursts into life, with a showery blizzard of static over which lies the jagged white letters of the “SKAM” logo.] RP: Man, these things are REALLY freaking me out. LVK: You’re just afraid that Vlad will get footage of you reading the 1950 Sears Ladies’ Catalog. RP: THAT’S A DAMNED LIE! LVK: Rick. RP: It was 195*2*! [The static fuzzes as the audience’s murmurs die down to a dull roar, and we are treated to a shot of .. Vlad Stukovski? Very unusual. Either he has forgotten where he put his own spy cameras, or there’s something very fishy going on ... Vlad is talking into his ever-present cellphone.] MARXMAN: Da, da. I understand, of kourse, but ... VHY? I -ALREADY- destroyed him! Enemy of the People is fallen in ruins, da? Krumbled to dust, his idolatry no longer a threat to the proletariat, purified by blood of the vorker? Remember? It vas on Impact only a few .... [Vlad quiets down as there is a buzzing from the phone.] MARXMAN: Da. I understand, Kommissar. Please to be accepting my humble apologies. It is not my place to be asking ... but to be krushing. Da. I am unvorthy skum. Da. And ugly. Da. Da. It vill be done before an hour has elapsed, komrade. [Vlad pushes the hang-up button with an audible beep, and then his face twists into a snarl of fury.] MARXMAN: VHAT BY LENIN’S GHOST IS GOING ON?!? [He kicks a bank of lockers so hard that they dent in the middle and groan dangerously. He places hits a speedial button on his cellphone and places it to his ear as he strides out of the shot.] MARXMAN [fading]: Grosko? Preevyet. Another mission for you and your brotherhood .... [The lockers teeter and fall to the floor with a tremendous crash as the shot fades back to static, and the “SKAM” logo, which itself fades.] RP: What the hell was that all about? Did Stukovski just get orders for another "mission"? LVK: Seems that way. And if that's the case, I'm glad I'm not backstage, because who knows who he might attack. Speaking of which, we're heading backstage again, to hear comments from one of the RCW wrestlers who isn't competing tonight.... [Jesse "the Avenger" Ewiak, still visibly tired after the brawl earlier, stands in front of the RCW logo backstage, a mic in his hand.] JE: Knight. [Pause] JE: So, you think you're still too big for me? You think that you're too talented for this 'bush' league still, bud? [Ewiak is seething.] JE: Knight, I'm gonna' let you in on a little secret. You are not a star! [POP from the fans in the arena!] JE: If you ask the average fan who Damon Knight is, they'll say, who? I'm not saying I have any action figures Damon, but the fact is, you're like the 9000 never have-beens who think because they get a big paycheck, you're a big star. You wanna' know who are stars, Damon? You really wanna' know? Hardin's a star. Martinez is a star. Courtade is a star. Reed is a star. Maniac Jack is a bigger star than you are Damon! [MASSIVE POP! for the mention of the big stars from other leagues.] JE: Hell, Extreme & Hopper are bigger stars than your overpaid ass! Knight, here's the facts. The one time you were in a 'big league', you got stuck in the mid-card. This was a fed with Valentine & Ethan 'By God I Suck' Andrews! [He chuckles.] JE: So here's my challenge, buddy. You wanna' prove you're a brand name? Fine, at the next Impact, Falls Count Anywhere, sign on the dotted line buddy, and I'll have the immense pleasure of kicking your ass. And that, my friend, you can take to the damn bank! [Fade back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: Jesse Ewiak laying down the challenge to Damon Knight, and from what we saw in that brawl earlier, we can expect mayhem if they do infact have a match next week. RP: Knight has beaten Ewiak before, and he'll do it again. LVK: Well, it's time for our next match, which pits the strange masked entity known as Mr Honeydew II against the charismatic Johnny Axis. With the bad blood which has come to exist between these men in recent weeks, Jim Catanzaro decided that the only way to settle it was by scheduling an "I Quit" match. RP: Fine by me. Honeydew's got it in the bag. He doesn't talk! How is Axis going to make him say the words? LVK: Good point. And with the punishment Axis' back has taken courtesy of Goku Waru's cane in recent weeks, the odds are definitely stacked against Johnny. Fans, I'm being told that moments ago our network system intercepted another S-KAM broadcast, which was videotaped and which we can show you now, especially considering it involves one of the men in this next match! [With a flicker of static, the screen goes black and white, and the "S-KAM" logo takes a prominent place down in the lower right corner of the screen. A shout escapes the crowd as President Catanzaro is seen to round the corner of a hallway in the backstage area, followed closely by a certain young man ... hey, that's Johnny Axis! The pair stop at the doorway to a room, maybe Catanzaro's temporary office in the venue. Who can tell? The angle's wrong to read the sign on the door.] JA: Jim, can I call you Jim? I honestly feel that you are, by far, the finest human being on the face of this world or any other. Y'know, I used to be a promoter, and I know how hard the decisions you make when booking matches can be, but this move, putting Honeydew and me into an "I Quit" match? Sheer brilliance. Me, I'll take blood out of that boy by the pint. If nothing else, I'll be a hit with the goth-wannabe vampire crowd. Well, them and the Red Cross. Regardless, I think it'll be a real big hit with the fans. Great move! Catanzaro: Well, I'm glad you're happy. I always like to see my employees happy. JA: So what you think is next on the trail to stardom for the Axis-man? Ol' "Jay-Ay" can't be stuck for too long a program with a running gag like Honeydon't, after all. Me, I was thinking maybe a little something involving ... maybe the Gateway strap? Might bring a little bit of prestige to a belt like that, having it on a respectable guy like myself. Hey, y'know, I'm in that tournament next month. If I win it, and I'm representing the RCW as your champion, it could be great P.R. for this fledgling promotion. [Catanzaro's half-smile disappears, as he shakes his head in disbelief.] Catanzaro: Great, another butt-kisser looking for a handout. Just what I need... JA: Whoa, whoa Jimbo, I'm not shooting for a handout, here. Just gimme a shot. I can beat the big fat retard Russkie, trust me. The Axis-man is anything but a panhandler. Catanzaro: Look Johnny, I've got stuff to take care of. This is a big night for RCW, and there's a lot to be done. I can't stand around here shooting the breeze. JA: Okay, okay, we can talk later, man. Tell you what, I'll have my secretary get in touch with Gloria, and we'll do lunch, work some *BLEEP* out. I'm thinking my shot at the title should come somewhere around mid-March, what you think? [Catanzaro's face creases into a non-impressed frown. He leans close to Axis, almost whispering.] Catanzaro: I think you better go sit your ass down somewhere before one of boys hears you talking like that and sticks their foot in it. Understand? [Catanzaro turns and goes through the door. SLAM!] JA: Um ... damn? [Static again as the grayscale screen of the "S-Kam" ceases to be, and the arena rematerializes.] LVK: Johnny Axis certainly is a very confident character. RP: He's a suck-up, pure and simple Van Keel. And even worse, the fans seem to like him. I never can figure out the punkhead fans. They cheer a self-serving idiot like Axis, and boo a guy like Honeydew, who is a bit strange, but is a pretty decent wrestler. LVK: I thought you didn't like Honeydew? RP: It's taken me a while to get past how odd he is, but now I see that he's a damn fine wrestler, and he's got a good teacher in Gecko Weirdo. LVK: Goku Waru. RP: Yeah, the Miyagi guy. LVK: Let's head to the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / "I Quit" match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ Johnny Axis TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ Mr Honeydew II (w/ Goku Waru) \________________________________________________________________ written by: Brandon F [The shot fades to the ring announcer standing center ring with the microphone in his hand.] RA: Ladies and Gentlemen ... this next match is an "I QUIT" MATCH! [Anticipation pop from the crowd.] RA: INTRODUCING FIRST ... standing 6 feet and 5 inches tall ... weighing in at 2 hundred and 45 pounds and accompanied to the ring by Goku Waru ... here is ... MR. HONEEEEEYDEWWWWW II!!!! [HEEL POP!] [The lights go off and a still picture of Mister Honeydew II's mask on a dummy's head goes on the screen above the entrance. The crowd murmurs a bit but then begins to give a small sized boo as "1999" by Cassius starts up over the PA and a spotlight hits the entrance way just in time to catch Goku Waru coming out. Waru's dressed in a black kimono tonight, along with The Big Pocket, his walking cane, and wooden step shoes. He gives a wide, open-mouthed smile to the crowd, grips his cane, and then turns his hands towards the entrance. A red gloved hand pops out, bringing some IIWF fans to cheer... but no, it's not Creed as another red gloved hand pops out and then a masked head... Yeaup, It's Mister Honeydew II. Dew II's dressed in his proper gear, honeydropped-mask, Members Only jacket, and taped on BlueBlockers... and some nifty red gloves he found before the show. He walks down the aisle confidently as Waru tips and twirls his cane. Dew II gives a mightly thumbs down before entering the ring and going into his corner.] LVK: Honeydew looks ready for this one ... and he better be! RP: What do you mean "he better be?" He's going to kill Axis! RA: AND HIS OPPONENT ... [Another anticipation - face sort of pop.] RA: Standing 6 feet and 2 inches tall ... and weighing in at 2 hundred and 25 pounds, he is ... JOHNNYYYYYY AXISSSSSSSSS!!!! [FACE POP!] #Nothing...# #Seems to kill me...# #No matter how hard I try.# ["Blow up the Outside World" by Soundgarden cranks out over the loudspeaker as a young man explodes from the backstage area. Posing for the crowd, he thrusts his hands high up into the air, palms forward, fingers outstretched. In a grand motion, he brings his arms down to his sides, then slaps his chest with both hands. Grinning like a cheshire cat, he then continues down the aisle, stroking his mustache and chinbeard.] #Nothing's closing my eyes.# #Nothing can beat me down.# [The music continues. Axis comes to the ring, hopping up to the apron and ducking inside. He kicks the bottom rope with his Wolverine boots experimentally, causing his trendy "Dockers" cargo pants to flop about madly.] #I've given everything I could,# #to blow it to hell and gone.# #Burrow down in and blow up the outside.# #BLOW UP THE OUTSIDE!# #BLOW UP THE OUTSIDE!# #BLOW UP THE OUTSIDE!# #BLOW UP THE OUTSIDE WORLD!# [So on and so forth. And Axis awaits the opening of the match, a big grin plastered across his face.] LVK: Axis has a big grin on his face ... but, it looks as though if he's hurting a little bit. RP: If he's not hurting now, he will be pretty soon! LVK: We'll see about that. *DING*DING*DING* [As the bell rings, Honeydew and Johnny Axis, both full of high hopes charge each other. Honeydew uses his power and size advantage as he shoves Axis back into the corner.] LVK: Mr. Honeydew II showing his great power and the advantage that he has over Johnny Axis. RP: I'd run now if I were Axis. [Both men charge again, but this time Axis is kneed in the mid-section and immediately pounded down to the mat with a forearm from Honeydew II. Honeydew grins and then plants a stomp onto the back of Axis' head.] LVK: And Honeydew takes control first. [Honeydew picks Axis up and slams him back down to the ground like a doll with a bodyslam. Axis clutches his back.] LVK: Axis is clutching his back after being bodyslammed. I don't think Axis is quite one hundred percent tonight, folks. I really don't. RP: Easy pickings for Honeydew II. [Mr. Honeydew II picks Axis back up once again and sends him to the ropes ... Axis gets a boot to the midsection and Honeydew II follows it up with a Spinning Neckbreaker!] RP: That's right Honeydew ... take it right to that punkhead! LVK: Good choice of words, genius. [Honeydew isn't finished yet as he executes a picture perfect leg drop onto the neck of Axis and then immediately grabs Axis by the hair and slams his head against the mat, repeatedly.] LVK: And Honeydew is going on quite the mean streak here with a relentless, unforgiving attack on Johnny Axis! [Mr. Honeydew II looks to the crowd, only to get booed. Axis is still clutching at his back, grimacing. Mr. Honeydew II, taking advantage of the hurt back of Axis turns Axis over and applies a vicious chinlock on Axis - putting all his force and power into it!] LVK: He's noticed Axis' weakness already, and is going for Johnny's hurt back! RP: Wouldn't you? [Axis has nowehre to go, and has to suffer the pain. Honeydew II, frustrated that Johnny isn't giving up gets off of Johnny and picks him up by the hair and applies a headlock on Axis. Axis with an elbow shot to the midsection ... and another one. The crowd begins to stir! Johnny Axis with another elbow to the midsection! Axis shoots off the ropes ...] LVK: THE CROSS BODY ATTEMPT IS BLOCKED AND HONEYDEW PLANTS AXIS WITH A FALL FORWARD SLAM!! GOOD GOD THAT WAS POWERFUL! RP: Indeedarooni! [A big sigh of dissappointment comes from the crowd as Goku Waru has a cheerful grin on his face, very pleased with that counter. As Axis clutches his back, Honeydew II looks over to Waru and gets a "thumbs up" from him. Honeydew goes right back to the attack and after picking Axis up, sends him to the turnbuckle with some serious force!] LVK: GEEZ! Axis' head just about came off with that whiplash from the turnbuckle! And if that wasn't enough, Mr. Honeydew II just charged in with one hell of a clothesline! Axis is in trouble now! RP: Look at him ... grabbing his back again, like a little baby. [Honeydew II sets Axis up ... CHOP! The crowd lets off a "WHOOOOOOO" and Honeydew with another chop! "WHOOOOOOOOOO!" Honeydew with yet _ANOTHER_ chop!! "WHOOOOOO!"] RP: And Axis falls flat on his face in the center of the mat. Those chops _HAD_ to hurt! LVK: There's no doubt about it ... chops like those would take anyone out. [Honeydew II picks Axis up and drops him with a Backbreaker, followed up with a Surfboard type of submission hold!] LVK: That's a painful, yet great move - I haven't seen that Surfboard in quite some time! RP: And look at Axis writher in pain! This is great! [Honeydew II, obviously frustrated yet _AGAIN_ that Axis shows no sign of giving up, drags Axis over to the ring ropes, draping his head over the bottom rope and sitting on the back of Axis' neck. Meanwhile, Honeydew II's manager, Goku Waru is just pounding the daylights out of Johnny Axis' face with some powerful fist shots to the temples!] LVK: CHEAPSHOTS! RP: Hey ... anything goes right? All you've gotta' do is make your opponent say "I QUIT!" [Honeydew II gets off Axis and Axis rolls to the outside of the ring, and Goku continues to lay it to Axis, stomping on his neck and throat now. Honeydew II with a Baseball slide underneath the bottom rope connects! Axis is sent reeling into the guardrail! Honeydew gets out of the ring and charges Axis!] LVK: JOHNNY AXIS DUCKS!! RP: NO! LVK: AXIS USES HIS RIGHT SHOULDER TO LIFT HONEYDEW II OVER THE GUARDRAIL!! [Axis with a surge of energy charges Goku ... and plants him with a clothesline!] LVK: THE CROWD LOVES IT!! RP: Oh ... sure, attack a helpless manager! LVK: He asked for it! [Johnny Axis is working on pure adrenaline now, as he drags Mr. Honeydew II over the top of the guardrail by his hair and whips him into the steel steps!] CROWD: AXIS!! AXIS!! AXIS!! [Axis dropkicks the steel steps, which in turn *DRILLS* Mr. Honeydew II in the head! Honeydew clutches his head and groans in pain! As Axis gets up, he still looks aggravated. He turns to Goku Waru.] LVK: OH NO!! [The crowd Boos!] RP: OH ... YES!! SALT TO THE EYES!! SALT TO THE EYES!! I _LOVE_ IT! [Axis falls to the floor, clutching his eyes. Goku goes over to coach Mr. Honeydew II into getting up by motioning with his hands. Mr. Honeydew II begins to move!] LVK: Both men are on the ground ... in pain ... but, both men are moving! RP: AND HONEYDEW IS UP!! LVK: AXIS TO HIS KNEE!! RP: Honeydew II charges ... LVK: AXIS IS UP AND CHARGING!! RP: HONEYDEW II DUCKS AND AXIS COLLIDES WITH GOKU WARU!! HOLY GUACAMOLE THIS IS _INSANE_! LVK: Honeydew II rolls Axis back into the ring, and sees if Goku is okay. Goku motions for Honeydew to get into the ring and Honeydew does ... but, Axis is back up to both knees ... what a fighter! What a damn fighter! [The crowd stands at attention, watching ... waiting for what's going to happen.] RP: BOTH MEN CHARGE EACH OTHER AGAIN!! LVK: DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!! DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN! [The referee Marc Gioffre stands, watching both competitors as they both try to get to their feet.] LVK: Once again, Mr. Honeydew II and Johnny Axis are trying to get to their feet. WAIT A MINUTE!! [Goku Waru has a steel chair in hand on the outside.] RP: Goku ... is SLIDING A CHAIR INTO THE RING FOR MR. HONEYDEW II!! [Goku Waru proceeds to pound on the apron, hopeing for Honeydew II to get up!] LVK: Oh, this a nail-biter folks! Both men are on all fours, and both men have their eyes set on the steel chair that's no more than five feet from them! [Honeydew II and Axis reach out at the same time for the chair ... and Honeydew with an elbow to the face of Johnny Axis, and Johnny tries to shake it off.] LVK: MR. HONEYDEW II HAS THE STEEL CHAIR!! RP: It's on now! LVK: HONEYDEW STANDS UP ... AND SWINGS ... * C L A N K * * T H U D * LVK: OH MY GOD!! RP: YES!! YES!! LVK: A STEEL CHAIR SHOT TO THE HEAD OF JOHNNY AXIS ... AND AXIS FELL TO THE MAT IN A HEAP! HE MAY BE OUT!! RP: Well ... he's not showing any signs of movement! Hell ... he _IS_ OUT! LVK: MR. HONEYDEW II ISN'T EVEN TRYING TO MAKE AXIS QUIT!! HE WANTS TO INFLICT MORE _PAIN_! RP: How can Axis say he quits when he's out like a light? LVK: Who knows? [Honeydew II drags Johnny Axis over to the turnbuckle. Axis moves his feet a little and opens his eyes.] LVK: Is Axis playing possum? His eyes opened ... then he closed them! I don't think Honeydew saw it!! [Honeydew II positions Axis in the corner and begins his trip to the top rope.] RP: WHY IS HONEYDEW II EVEN UP THERE!? HE'S TOO DAMN BIG TO BE JUMPING FROM THE TOP ROPE!! [Honeydew II gets to the top rope.] LVK: AXIS IS UP!! AXIS IS UP!! AXIS JUMPS TO THE SECOND ROPE ... HOOKS HONEYDEW II ... NECKBREAKER!! NECKBREAKER FROM THE TOP ROPE AND HONEYDEW COLLAPSES ONTO THE STEEL CHAIR!! NOW JOHNNY AXIS IS GOING TO THE TOP!! RP: OH... God .... GOD NO! LVK: A THREE HUNDRED AND SXITY DEGREE FLIP OFF THE TURNBUCKLE ONTO MR. HONEYDEW II!! THAT'S WHAT AXIS CALLS "FALLING SKY!" [Johnny Axis, after executing that move positions the steel chair in between the legs of Mr. Honeydew II, while the steel chair is there, Axis applies a figure four leg lock! Honeydew II immediately taps out!] RP: HE _CAN'T_ SAY "I QUIT!" HONEYDEW II CAN'T EVEN TALK!! LVK: BUT, HE'S TAPPING OUT!! ISN'T THAT ENOUGH!? RP: No... that's why it's called an "I QUIT" match! [Honeydew II's back hits the mat, and he's showing no more fight to the hold. As a matter of fact, he's showing no movement at all! Goku Waru looks worried on the outside.] RP: GOKU WARU IS CLIMBING INTO THE RING!! LVK: WHAT? [Goku stomps on Axis' chest, breaking the hold. Axis stands up and gets in Goku's face!] RP: JOHNNY AXIS HAS GRABBED GOKU WARU BY THE THROAT!! LVK: HE THROWS GOKU TO THE MAT .... AND NOW HE'S APPLYING THE FIGURE FOUR LEG LOCK ON GOKU WARU!! RP: DON'T SAY IT!! DO _NOT_ SAY IT!! [Goku Waru is fighting it with all his might! He's fighting it! Fighting it!] [... "I QUITTU!!" ... "I QUITTU!" ... "I QUITTU! ...] *DING*DING*DING* RP: WAIT A MINUTE!! LVK: THE REFEREE HAS JUST CALLED FOR THE BELL! RP: WHY? [The ring announcer puts the microphone up to his mouth on the outside of the ring.] RA: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN ... YOUR WINNER ... ......JOHNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYY AXXXXXISSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! [MEGA CROWD POP!!!] RP: HOW DID HE WIN!? GOKU WARU SAID THAT HE QUIT! HONEYDEW NEVER SAID ANYTHING!! LVK: But, he's still the winner! RP: Oh, this one ain't over by a long shot! [The fans continue to cheer for Johnny Axis as he poses nearby the ropes for the crowd. Meanwhile, Mister Honeydew II starts to wake a bit, rolling from side to side as he's still in pain.] LVK: I'm still shocked at what Axis did to Goku Waru. But I guess this match called for extremely measures given that Honeydew is incapable of speaking. RP: Come on, just call him a mute, ok? Man, everything's so damned politcally correct and everyone's so damned sensative! Why can't we get back to the times when men were men and women were women... [As Rick goes off on his rant, Honeydew II finally gets back up, with some obvious pain, and is handed that walking cane of Waru's.] RP: ...when did "midget" or "little one" become such bad- LVK: Hate to interrupt [sigh] but Dew Two's up and he's got that cane again! Axis better turn around fast or he'll be in the same situation as past matches between these two! RP: That's it Axis, continue acting like a dope and pose for the fans. [Honeydew II shakes off his pain a bit and starts charging for Axis, Cane held up high, ready to crack right into the head of the victor...] LVK: AXIS DUCKED AND ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY! Axis turned around just in time to see the charging Dew II and ducked and rolled out to escape another back-breaking fate! RP: I'm surprised throughout a match like this he'd have enough steam for anything right now, let alone being aware enough to sneak out like that. LVK: It doesn't look to be over, though, as this maniac Mister Honeydew II still has the cane in hand and is creeping in on Axis. He takes one swing, but Axis leans his body back to escape that. [Mr. Honeydew II takes another swing, but Axis backs up to avoid that hit. Dew II takes a couple more swings and Axis is able to backtrack them all until he hits the ropes. Behind Axis is Waru, ready with a chair.] LVK: Axis looks to be between a rock and a hard place right now. RP: More like a fruit and an old guy, but either way it's not the place to be. LVK: Can't we get someone out here to stop this? This... thing just can't take the fact that he lost - and now he's taking it out on a man who wrestled a fine match. [Waru laughs a bit as Dew II cranks that walking cane up again, ready to smack Axis' head with it. The fans, meanwhile, are booing a good deal as they don't want to see their hero squashed here.] LVK: Damn these two! Get security! RP: No, I want to see this.... Could be good, you know? [Dew II finally brings the cane down, but just drops it half-way through the swing...] LVK: DEW POINT II! DEW POINT II! Johnny Axis used Honeydew II's favorite move against him and got out of ANOTHER sticky situation! RP: What's he doing now? LVK: I... I think he's going to rip off Dew II's mask! He's signalling to the crowd that he's going to reveal the face of this strange individual. RP: Gecko Weirdo here sure is freaking out about this. LVK: He couldn't stand having his charge talk, and now he's going to be revealed, so I'd imagine he would have problems about this. [Axis drops down and tugs at the Honeydropped mask of Mister Honeydew II. Dew II's still in pain, but he struggles a bit, trying to slap away the hands of Axis. However, it's a futile attempt as Axis yanks away at the mask once... twice.... three times....] LVK: Is that...? No, it can't be! RP: Who? Who? [A somewhat shocked crowd gasps for a moment as Perle continues to ask who it is.] LVK: It can't be him, though. He's not employed by this company! [In the ring, Johnny Axis tries to take a look at the face of the man behind the Mister Honeydew II mask, but the former Dew II covers up his face.] LVK: That's.... Mark Langseth?!? RP: What? Who's that? LVK: He's a wrestler in another place and has ties to some in RCW, but... [Waru shoves his way into the ring with a towel, furiously shouting at Axis as he puts the towel around the former Dew II's head.] RP: All I could see was a face, but it looked a little weird looking. LVK: Yeah, I couldn't spot any hair or anything and he looked a little bigger, but that was Mark Langseth's face. I remember him myself and that was his face! [Waru leads Mark Langseth out of the ring and up the aisle, making sure that the towel stays in place over the former Mister Honeydew II's head.] LVK: Mark Langseth has been wrestling in RCW all along, under a mask! Amazing! RP: Langseth eh? The guy who wrestles out west? The former World Champion out west? LVK: That's him. Wow, what a revelation! [Dew and Langseth disappear through the curtain, as the fans are still in shock. In the ring, Axis is also in disbelief.] LVK: Okay, well, it seems we've got a camera backstage following Wildcat Jim Lewis junior, who is set to wrestle Michael White in a grudge match later tonight.... [The shot cuts away from Rick and Larry to a backstage locker room, where we see a man in a white doctor’s coat standing behind a bench on which sits “Wildcat” Jim Lewis, Jr.! The fans pop when the see the Australian superstar, but his face is grave as the doctor probes gently at his neck. The doctor, a short man with an “RCW” patch on his coat wearing tinted glasses and sporting a huge gray beard, nods sagely.] DOCTOR: I think there may be some stiffness back here, young man. Worrisome, worrisome. The mandibular tendons could become completely ensnared in the afterior legigata. This could cause a flux in the twistiffira vertebrae. You’d better go down to the infirmary and get some Cortizone. This could be serious. [LVK]: Twistiffira vertebrae? I'm no doctor, but that doesn't sound right. [Lewis nods and hops off the bench, rubbing his neck with a slightly confused expression as he walks down the hall. The doctor grins behind his gray beard.] DOCTOR: You bet your life it’s serious, chumley. [He pads after Lewis, and the shot switches to one coming from a camera which is following Lewis. He opens the door to the arena infirmary and sees a big, dark man with a Paul McCartney hairdo and blue sunglasses sitting in the waiting room, with a tall, blonde ugly woman in a nurse’s cap at the receptionist’s desk. She sees Lewis come in and smiles, waving enthusiastically before speaking in a high falsetto:] RECEPTIONIST: Oh, jolly good! You’re here! Just sign the clipboard and go on in, sweetie! The doctor will be with you shortly! LEWIS: But, I just saw a doctor ... and this gentleman was in front of me ... [The receptionist leaps up and forcibly helps Lewis and the RCW cameraman through the door, slamming it shut and locking it with a loud click. Lewis hammers at the door for a second, and then turns as a shadow falls across him. He looks up -- and up -- and up ... to the bearded face of Vlad “The Marxman” Stukovski. Vlad is wearing a surgeon’s mask and a doctor’s smock, along with black gloves. He grins behind his mask.] [RP]: ARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! MARXMAN: Time to operate. [Vlad lunges forth with a big boot that catches an unprepared Lewis in the jaw, snapping his head back HARD against the metal door, dazing him. Before he can recover, Vlad grabs him and HURLS him into the steel observation table in the middle of the room. Wildcat hits it ribs-first, doubling over it, and there is a hollow *CLANG*.] [LVK]: DEAR LORD!!!! THIS WAS ALL AN ELABORATE TRAP SET BY STUKOVSKI!!!! [Vlad quickly follows and grabs his head, ramming it into the steel table, before kicking the table over sideways so its blunt edge points up in the air. Stukovski then grabs Lewis in a cobra clutch .... and LEAPS OVER THE TABLE, BULLDOGGING Lewis RIGHT across it! There is a sickening rending, crunching sound, and Lewis howls in pain as he rolls over, clutching his ribs. Vlad lays in a swift boot to his head, and then grabs him, hoisting him high over his head, and SLAMMING his back down across Vlad’s knee with a POPPING sound! Wildcat’s mouth goes wide as he rolls to the floor, now clutching his back as well. Vlad kicks the steel table flat on the floor once more, and grabs Jim Lewis off the floor, hoisting him up and OVER swiftly, POWERSLAMMING him into the metal table! Vlad stands up and glares intensely down as Lewis writhes in pain on the floor. Suddenly, there is a loud knocking at the door ... ] Muffled voice: Hey, boss! Security’s here, and we’re holdin’ ‘em off with chairs, but there’s a lot of ‘em! They want .... *oof* ... IN! VLAD: Let them kome. [Vlad strides to the door, tearing off his smock and mask, and rips the door open. The “doctor”, “receptionist”, and “Paul McCartney” all spill in, waving folding steel chairs at the wave of men in RCW security shirts who follow them. Vlad ROARS at them, parting them like the Red Sea, and he and his fellows make their exit as security personnel try to help Jim Lewis to his feet. Fade back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: What the hell is Stukovski's problem? He isn't fighting the Wildcat tonight! In fact, he beat him last week! Why would he want to attack him so viciously, or attack him at all? RP: It's the KGB Van Keel. They give the orders, and the big Ruski carries them out. LVK: The KGB doesn't *EXIST* anymore! RP: Tell Stukovski that. LVK: But whatever Russian agency is giving out Stukovski's orders is doing things very strangely. It makes no sense for Stukovski to attack the Australian superstar, and even Stukovski knows it! Remember the way he tried to argue with whoever he was on the phone with earlier, when he appeared to be receiving his "mission orders"? RP: Yeah. Stop trying to figure it all out Van Keel. All that matters is that the Wildcat got his ass handed to him. LVK: Yeah, and that's just plain not right. Well, it's time to move along, and hardcore wrestling fans, sit back and enjoy, because this next offering promises to be among the most brutal bouts ever sanctioned by RCW! RP: It's not gonna be pretty Van Keel. Not pretty at all. In Carson Nash and JD Laredo you've got two tough sumbitches. Throw in barbwire, a leather strap and cacti, and well....expect bloodshed galore. LVK: Indeed. Let's head to the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Desert Death Match from Hell |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ "Razorfists" JD Laredo TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ "Blackjack" Carson Nash \________________________________________________________________ written by: John E [The camera fades down towards the ring as ring personnel is wrapping the final strands of barbed wire around the ring ropes, in preperation for The Desert Hell Death Match. The once friendly squared circle has been almost instantly transformed into an instrument of destruction, with tall cactuses strapped to each corner and large trunks in the center of the ring.] RA: "Ladies and Gentlemen - The following contest is a special Grudge Match, and will be contested under Desert Hell Death Match Rules! There will be no count-outs, no disqualifications, and no time limit! The only way to be victorious is by pinfall or submission!" [As the ring announcers voice fades off into the rafters of The Keil Center, "Ecstacy of Gold " from The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly is cued up to the building. Almost instantly the fans leap to their feet in cheers as the curtains part and JD Laredo makes his way through, holding a ten foot bullrope high over his head. Instead of his usual wrestling garb, he is dressed in a pair of dark black denim jeans, a black Jack Daniels T-Shirt, and a vest with the State of Texas. His hands are wrapped up past the wrists with dark black athletic tape, and clutching a bottle of his favorite beverage. LVK: "Well here comes the long tall Texan, and it looks like he is read for a fight!" RP: "If it's a fight JD is looking for, I KNOW that Carson Nash is going to be more than willing oblige!" [Running his hands through his long black hair, JD Laredo surveys the scene before rolling under the bottom rope. With a loud yell, he charges across the ring - holding the bullrope over his head as the fans let out a MAJOR FACE POP! Suddenly his music comes to a screeching hault, only to be replaced by The Doors' "Riders On The Storm."] RA: "Introducing in the ring at this time, the first participant. He hails from Fort Worth, Texas and weighed in tonight at 280lbs. Here is "RAZORFISTS" JD LAREEEEEEEDO!!!!!!!!" [The fans erupt in cheers for a few more seconds, until "Blackjack" Carson Nash makes his way through the curtain, at which point the fans grow extremely hostile. Nash pays no attention to the response of the crowd as he stops for a moment, pointing a warning finger at JD Laredo. Nash has also opted for a more rugged look, choosing to hide his well sculpted physique under a white thermal shirt layered underneath an open plaid flannel shirt. His blue jeans are tucked neatly into a pair of dark black wrestling boots.] RA: "His opponent hails from Reno, Nevada! He weighed in tonight at...." [The words of the ring announcer are cut off as "Blackjack" Carson Nash breaks into a sprint - diving under the bottom rope as JD Laredo charges to meet him. Instantly the bell rings as the fans scream in anticipation of the carnage that is about to unravel.] =0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0 *** WARNING *** The following contest is a special Desert Hell Death Match. The contents of this match may possibly be very graphic in nature and thus parental discression is advised. Again, this match is not intended for the sqeamish or weak of heart. =0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0 =0 FOX Sports Net MidWest 0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0=0 RP: "What the hell was that?!?" LVK: "Legal Mumbo Jumbo. But THIS right here has all the makings to be what some out of touch announcers would call a slobberknocker!" RP: "Indeedarooni! As these two men are lacing into one another with some of the stiffest rights and lefts that I have ever seen! But aren't they supposed to be attatched by that bullrope?" LVK: "I think all rules are out the window in this one as LD Laredo goes for a haymaker, but Carson Nash manages to duck underneath! Nash now grabs the dangling left arm of the Texan and whips whips him across the ring towards the barbed wire..." [The fans take to the edges of their seat, as "Razorfists" puts on the brakes just a few short inches from making contact with the rusty barbed wire. As Laredo breathes a sigh of relief, Carson Nash shoves one of the trunks out of the way and motions for JD to bring it on again.] LVK: "Quick thinking on the part of JD Laredo, as he just narrowly avoided that barbed wire. But now the two men charge one another, and we have a collar and elbow tie-up." RP: "Laredo has the size advantage, but Nash has an edge on speed. It will be interesting to see how they come into play in tonights match-up, as it's now Laredo with a go behind. He has a waistlock, and in amature fashion, he lifts the feet of Nash off the ground and deposits him on the canvas. JD however still riding Carson Nash, as he inches his closer to the ropes!" LVK: "Laredo reaching out with his taped hand and grabs the bottom rope, trying to introduce that barbed wire to the forehead of "Blackjack," but Nash just slipped back between the legs of the Texan and into safety." [Feeling a bit cocky, Nash points to his head - signalling that he outsmarted the bigger man. Seeing this, Laredo simply charges and plants a boot in the face of the still kneeling Nash.] RP: "HOLY TONY LAMAS! Laredo just took the head of Carson Nash clear off his shoulders - and are my eyes deceiving me, or is JD sporting a set of spurs tonight!" LVK: "I think you're right Rick - and something tells me he plans on using them right about now!" [As Carson Nash tries to shake the cobwebs out, Laredo kicks a foot up on the second rope and reaches around behind his boot, unfastening his spurs. Nash soon realizes what is happening and slides out under the bottom rope to the outside of the ring.] LVK: "Nash getting the hell out of Dodge, as Laredo drops to his chest and rolls out under the bottom rope - weilding that spur as if it where a butcher knife! Nash running for his life, but this is all punishment that he has brought on himself, with these unprovoked attacks over the past couple of weeks." RP: "But it's Laredo right on the heels of Blackjack, as Nash runs around the ring and slides back under the bottom rope, being careful not to hit those rusty barbs that encase the ring ropes. Here comes Laredo right behind him!" LVK: "Nash still backing away, but Laredo seems to be narrowing the dista...." [The words of Von Keel are soon cut off by a deafening HARDCORE POP as Carson Nash drops to the ground and trips Laredo up with a drop toe hold, sending him face first into the bottom rope. The face of the Texan brushes against the barbs, before nailing the canvas - where a puddle of crimson soon starts to form.] LVK: "OH MY GOD! Did you see the way that barb just ran up and over the face of JD Laredo! He could have cut seriously injured himself there - but Nash is now relentless as he pulls on the vest of JD Laredo, trying to get it off of his body." RP: "Nash is like a shark smelling blood, as he rolls JD Laredo onto his back, in an attempt to relieve him of that leather vest. But Laredo fights back, with a long kick that catches Nash right between the eyes. Nash staggers back as JD rolls to his feet, wiping the blood from his eyes!" LVK: "Still partially blinded from the gash in his forehead, Laredo charges with a clothesline - but Nash manages to roll around behind him and lock on a waist lock. The Texan responds with a kick back, that finds the groin of Blackjack." RP: "I think Carson Nash's eyes and/or testicles are somewhere around row twelve as Laredo connected with that move! Laredo now reversing the waistlock - and shoving Carson Nash towards the ropes." [Trying to avoid contact with the barbed wire, Carson Nash ducks his head between the top two ropes - but finds the middle rope soon digging into his midsection. As he throws his head back in agony JD Laredo grabs the top rope and brings it down across the forehead of Blackjack.] LVK: "YES! YES! YEEEEESSSSS! JD Laredo is digging into the forehead of Carson Nash now with that barbed wire wrapped top rope, and opening a hole in his forehead the size of Nevada's own Grand Canyon! I guess now we know WHY that warning was given at the top of this match!" RP: "Nash is trying to get away from the rusty barbs, but Laredo has him pinned against that second rope! But quick thinking by Nash as he rolls over the second rope and to the floor of The Keil Center - leaving a little bit of that thermal shirt behind." [The camera zooms in on Carson Nash as he sits on the floor of the arena in a trance-like state as blood cascades down over his face. Back in the ring, JD Laredo scoops up the bullrope and slides to the outside, wrapping it around the wrist of Nash.] LVK: "Nash is just totally out of it, due to the loss of blood - but Laredo jerking him to his feet with the assistance of that bullrope! Nash now going along for the ride as JD shortens up the length of the rope and whips Carson gut first into the guardrail." * CLANK * RP: "Nash doubled over, over that guardrail as JD hops over the steel and into the sea of fans here in St. Louis. The Texan now charges and plants an elbow across the back of the neck of Carson Nash, who seems a bit out of place amongst the barbed wire, and the weaponry of this Desert Hell Death Match!" LVK: "The head of Blackjack now bouncing back from the impact of Laredo's elbow, as JD now takes one of the steel ringside chairs and measures it up with the head of Nash! HE SWIIIINGS...NO! Nash manages to block the shot with his hands, and is trying to wrestle the chair from the grasps of the mighty Texan!" RP: "Carson Nash finally gains control of the chair with a well placed boot to the stomach. Nash now taking the edge of that chair and running it into the throat of JD Laredo, sending him into a coughing fit." [Not giving JD much of a chance to recover, Nash brings the steel down hard across the Texas back, dropping him onto all fours.] LVK: "Nash now puts the chair behind his legs and leaps into the air, driving the chair into the back of Laredo's head with a modified Arabian Facebuster." RP: "WHATAMOVE! Nash making good use of that chair, but now turning his attention back towards the ring. He's pointing at one of those two trunks - let's see what is inside!" [As the fans explode in a MAJOR WHATS IN THE BOX POP, Carson Nash slides under the bottom rope and reaches for the lid of the trunk. Unfortunately Laredo intercepts things, but shortening up the slack in the bullrope, that is still tied aroud the wrist of Nash.] RP: "DAMMIT! Nash was just inches from unleashing one of the two secret weapons that some twisted mind back at RCW Headquarters thought up. What was his name again? Eibach or something?" LVK: "The name isn't important, what IS important is that Laredo is back up to his feet and in a tug of war of sorts with Carson Nash - that Razorfist seems to be winning as he jerks on the rope." [Overpowered by Laredo, Nash is yanked forward and runs chest first into the barbed wire wrapped ropes for the second time this evening - even more of his white thermal tearing against the barbs. Just as Nash frees himself from the prickly steel barbs, Laredo goes for a second tug - pulling him bare chested into the wire once again.] LVK: "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! Flesh and Barbed Wire do NOT make a good combination, as that is tearing right into the skin of Carson Nash! But Laredo now coming into the ring and wrapping the bullrope around the neck and throat of Nash." RP: "Laredo steps around in front of Nash, and takes him over with a modified snapmare - throwing him over by the rope instead. The Texan quickly gets back to his feet and takes Nash over for a second time with the same maneuver." LVK: "Great mixture of basic mat wrestling skills, and grotesque piercing flesh here in this Desert Hell Death Match as now JD Laredo gets his fingers between the rope and the back of Carson Nash's neck. LOOK AT THE POWER OF LAREDO!!!" [In one jerk, JD Laredo lifts the body of Carson Nash from a seated position, high into the air, before sending him crashing to the canvas - all by the neck.] RP: "Carson Nash is kicking for all it's worth, as he is trying to get some wind into his lungs. Laredo goes for it a second time, but Nash manages to brace his feet and charge backwards - forcing the back of JD Laredo into the...." LVK: "HOLY PRICKLY CACTUS THINGAMAJIGGER IN THE ASS! Carson Nash just ran JD Laredo back first into that cactus, and The Texan slumps down onto his knees. Nash now unwinding that rope from around his neck, AND taking the bullrope off his wrist as well!" RP: "Blackjack now pulling Laredo up to his feet and backing him into that cactus once again, but this time wrapping the bullrope around his waist! Nash bails out under the bottom rope as he is TYING JD LAREDO TO THE CACTUS!!!!!" LVK: "There is no way in hell, JD is getting loose either as his wrists are being bound to the ropes as well with that bullrope. This is NOT a good predicament to be in as Nash returns to the squared circle!" [Nash quickly pulls one of the trunks over in front of JD Laredo, and backs across the ring as he makes a throat slicing motion - drawing a major SOMETHING GOOD IS GONNA HAPPEN POP from the crowd.] RP: "I think I know what Nash has in mind, and here he comes!" [At full speed Carson Nash comes charging across the ring at JD Laredo. Just as he is about to leap up onto the trunk to use it as a springboard, Laredo uses his free feet to kick the trunk out of the ring causing Nash to stumble right into a...] LVK: "BIG BOOT BY JD LAREDO!!!!" RP: "SCREW THAT! LOOK!!!!!" [The camera quickly pans to the trunk that landed on the outside of the ring. The impact from the fall threw the lid open - where a nearly three foot long rattlesnake sits coiled up in a pile of sand. As the image is shown on The RiverTron, the fans erupt in a deafening HARDCORE POP!] RP: "THERE'S A SNAKE IN THE BOX!!!!" [Nash looks just as shocked as the capacity crowd as the snake seems to lash out at the camera that is filming the inside of the box. Quickly Nash scoops up the vest that he tore off of JD Laredo earlier and begins to wrap his hand in the leather.] LVK: "And Nash wastes no time in finding a make shift snake handlers glove as he rolls to the outside of the ring. He looks a little tentative to be dealing with such a deadly beast, but finally reaches in and grabs the serpent just below the head." RP: "HE'S GOT THE SNAKE!!!!!" LVK: "THIS IS NOT GOOD!!!!! I don't think JD Laredo is even aware of what is going on, as he is busy trying to free himself from that cactus! NEVERMIND - HE JUST GOT A LOOK!" [The face of JD Laredo suddenly goes pale as Carson Nash slithers under the bottom rope and points at the Laredo and then at the rattler, who's mouth is gaping open - it's dangerous fangs exposed to the world.] RP: "Nash is wasting time playing to these fans as Laredo has managed to get his hands free from the ropes and is trying to untie his waist. But here comes Blackjack with that ... that ... what the hell is going through these people's minds?!?" LVK: "Carson Nash, bringing that snake within inches of the next of JD Laredo, who lashes out and grabs the wrist of his opponent - holding him at bay. The Texan now unwrapping that rope from around his stomach with his free hand as the two men are trying to wrestle over a snake! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD THEY ARE WRESTLING OVER A SNAKE!" RP: "And it looks to me like Laredo may have the upper hand, as he is drawing the teeth of the snake ever closer to the neck of Carson Nash. But Nash is bridging backwards, as his head hits the canvas. LOOK AT THAT BRIDGE!" LVK: "LOOK AT THAT SNAKE! Nash now powering his way back up to his feet, as he wraps a leg behind Laredo's and trips him up - sending the Texan to the canvas. Nash now has full control as Laredo quickly rolls to the safety outside the ring. THANK GOD!" [Not wanting to deal with the dangerous reptile, Laredo picks up the trunk that it was found in and slides it back in under the bottom rope. Referee Gus Moxley (who is officiating this match, just in case someone wants to go for a pinfall) points to Nash, telling him to put the snake away.] RP: "Surprisingly Nash complies, tossing the rattler back into it's trunk as Laredo slips under the bottom rope." [The fans let out a WHAT A WASTE OF A GOOD PROP GROAN as JD Laredo throws a handful of sand into the eyes of Carson Nash.] LVK: "Laredo just blinded Nash, who staggers back and OH SHIT!" [The Savvis Center suddenly explodes with electricity as JD Laredo grabs the rattler bare handed and yanks it out of the box, forcing it's fangs into the neck of Carson Nash.] LVK & RP: "OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOD! THAT SNAKE HAS JUST TORN INTO THE NECK OF CARSON NASH!!!!!" [JD Laredo finally pulls the snake away from the neck of Carson Nash, where there are clearly two bite marks - holding the reptile up high for the thousands of photographing fans.] Fans: OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH RP: "OH MY GOD IS RIGHT! I can not believe what we just witnessed! JD Laredo may have just KILLED Carson Nash, who is lying motionless in the middle of the ring! Wait, I spoke too soon!!!!" [The fans gasp in shock as Carson Nash suddenly rolls to his knees, his hand covering his neck as he swings with his free hand, catching a distracted JD Laredo from behind. As Laredo spins around, Carson Nash scoops up all 280 plus pounds of the Texan and drives the back of his head into the canvas with the Emerald Fusion, that he likes to call...] LVK: "THE JACKPOT! NASH JUST HIT THE JACKPOT!!!! RP: "Carson Nash floats over and makes the cover on JD Laredo, and we have our first and quite possibly LAST count of the match!!!!" ONE! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THRE- LVK: "What the hell is Nash doing?!?!?!?!?!?!? HE JUST LET JD LAREDO UP!!!!" RP: "You're guess is as good as mine, but he obviously as something in store as he slides to the outside of the ring and undoes one of the bungee cords that holds the cactus in place!" [The Savvis Center takes to their feet once again as Carson Nash mounts the top rope, holding onto the edge of the tall cactus that is propped against the buckles. Suddenly a sea of flashbulbs explode as Carson Nash leaps off the top rope and brings the cactus crashing into the chest of a prone JD Laredo. Fans: OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD!OH MY GOD! LVK: "WHAT WON'T THESE TWO MEN DO TO ONE ANOTHER!!!!! Snakes! Cactuses! Barbed Wire! And where the hell is Nash going?!?" RP: "He's going to that other trunk! Please let it be another sn...wait, Nash just collapsed onto his knees! I think the venom of that serpent might actually be kicking in! He's.....out!" [An eerie silence falls over the crowd as Carson Nash collapses face first to the canvas - completely out cold. Referee Gus Moxley quickly calls for paramedics as JD Laredo rolls onto his stomach and notices what is happening. Irate over the officials decision, Laredo grabs Moxley by the hair and throws him to the outside of the ring. LVK: "JD just tossed the official, and is now looking in our direction?!?" JD Laredo: (towards the announcers) "You get a Referee out here with some balls, because Ah'm gonna kill this sumbitch!" RP: "I think he already may have!" LVK: "Well it looks like Nash is still breathing, but he definitely is in need of some medical attention. Laredo's giving him attention, just not the kind he needs as he reaches into the second trunk and pulls out a carpet?!? How is THAT supposed to be Hardcore?!?" RP: (laughing) "Maybe it's a MAGIC carpet - HA HA!" LVK: "Was that supposed to humorous or something Rick? Because I'm not laughing, and neither is JD Laredo as he sets that tall cactus up across those two trunks - building a bridge of sorts." RP: "This can't go on, Carson Nash could be dying for Christ's sake!" LVK: "I can't possibly imagine RCW Officials allowing such a dangerous and potentially lethal creature loose in the ring without de-venomizing it!" RP: "Well go ask Carson Nash, as JD Laredo removes a second cactus from the turnbuckle - bridging it across the trunks. He's making a cactus table!" [The Texan reaches down and grabs a handful of Carson Nash's hair trying to pick him up - but Blackjack hangs there lifeless, until suddenly.] LVK: "NASH IS SWINGING!....AND MISSING!" [The crowd looks on in shock as Nash struggles to break free from the grasp of Laredo.] RP: "Carson Nash is swinging for his life, but it is all for naught as JD scoops him up on a slam and deposits him on top of the two catcuses!" LVK: "I think the word is cacti, and they are digging into the back of The Nevada Native! But what is Laredo up to?!?" [Once again an earth shaking SUPER GIGANTIC SOMEONE IS GOING TO BE BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS POP engulfs The Savvis Center as Laredo opens the carpet underneath the cacti to reveal...] LVK: "EXPLOSIVES!!!!!!" RP: "C4! C4! C4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" [Feeling the energy emanating from the crowd, JD Laredo throws his head back and throws up "The Longhorns" to which the fans respond in like. Wasting no more time, Laredo slides out under the bottom rope and snatches a ringside chair, as he begins to climb the ropes.] LVK: "Things are NOT looking good for Carson Nash, but wait - Laredo's pants leg just got caught up in the barbed wire!" RP: "And here comes Carson Nash!!!!" [Still groggy from the effects of the snakebite, Nash rolls off the edge of the cactus and onto the canvas - crawling towards the corner.] LVK: "SWEET MOTHER MAHOOPANY! HOW IS CARSON NASH STILL FIGHTING!!!!" RP: "I DON'T KNOW! But he just inadvertently crotched Laredo on the top! I think JD is going to cross eyes come tomorrow morning." LVK: "Nash is definitely fighting on instinct now as he tries to climb up to the top....but doesn't have the energy in him, and falls back down to the canvas!" RP: "But he is RELENTLESS! He's back up to his feet, and has just draped the body of JD Laredo over his shoulder aga...NO!!!!!" LVK: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" [The weight of JD Laredo on the shoulder of the dazed Carson Nash, causes The Nevada Native to stagger backwards, sending both men through the two cacti and onto the C4 laced carpet.] ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** ******* KABOOM ******** Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! LVK: "THEY BOTH JUST FELL INTO THOSE DETONATIONS!!!!!!!" Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RP: "THEY'VE GOT TO BE DEAD!!!!!!" Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! LVK: "BOTH MEN ARE DOWN - AND REFEREE GUS MOXLEY IS JUST AS SHOCKED AS THE REST OF US!!!!! BUT NASH IS ON TOP!!!!" The official drops to make the count... ONE! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THREE!!!!! [The fans breath a sigh of relief as both men lay prone on the canvas. Suddenly Referee Gus Moxley springs to his knees and holds up two fingers.] LVK & RP: "WHAAAAAT!!!!!" [The Savvis Center returns to their feet once again as JD Laredo rolls out from underneath Carson Nash, who is starting to stir a bit as well. With a handful of hair, Laredo jerks Blackjack to his feet and picks him up in a bodyslam position.] RP: "Laredo has Carson Nash up, and charges forward with a running sit-out bodyslam! Laredo keeps the position as the official starts to count..." ONE! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THRE-Carson Nash kicks out! LVK: "How the HELL does he have it in him! He has been skewered with barbed wire, bitten by a rattlesnake, and fallen through C4 explosives and STILL kicks out from a devastating Michinoku Driver!" RP: "Not to be confused with The Texas Driver, which it looks like Laredo is going for NOW!" [The Texan picks Carson Nash and drapes him over his shoulder, so that his head is dangling over his back. Laredo reaches around and cradles the head of Nash. In one motion he leaps into the air and drives the back of Blackjack's head into a piece of cactus that is still lying in the ring.] LVK: "TEXAS DRIVER ON THE CACTUS! TEXAS DRIVER ON THE CACTUS!!!!" RP: "HE HOOKS THE LEG!" ONE! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THREE! LVK: "NO! ONLY TWO! DIE ALREADY NASH!" RP: "Um - yeah?!?" LVK: "What does this man have flowing through his veins that causes him to kick out?" RP: "My guess would be snake venom?!?" LVK: "I am starting to think that with all the blood loss, he may have bled the venom right out of his system - because he continues to come back again, and again, and again!" [Laredo pounds his fists into the canvas in a sign of frustration as he grabs the shirt of Carson Nash and starts to tear it off his back the rest of the way.] LVK: "Carson Nash is trying to get back to his feet, much to the shock of this capacity crowd - but JD Laredo is tearing his shirt into shreds and draping it over the top rope! What the hell is JD thinking?!?" RP: "I don't know, but he just went for that trusty bottle of Jack Daniels that he always carries with him and is taking a swig of it for energ...NO! Carson Nash just kicked Laredo in the groin and now snatches that bottle out of his hands!" LVK: "Nash just spit a mouthful of that JD all over well....JD! Someone once said that devious minds think alike, and this appears to be the case as Carson Nash is dousing those pieces of his shirt on the barbed wire covered ropes in Jack Daniels! This is NOT going to be pretty!!!!" RP: "As Nash spins around, he is dazed by a right hand from JD Laredo that sends the bottle crashing to the canvas, and shattering into pieces. Laredo now with another right hand that staggers Nash back into the barbed wire covered ropes!" [As Carson Nash rebounds off the ropes, Laredo catches him with a kick to the stomach - doubling him over as he locks in a standing head scissors.] LVK: "Laredo going for what looks to be a powerbomb, but first he digs into his pocket for...MATCHES!!!!" [With The Savvis Center back on their feet, JD Laredo lights the entire pack of matches and lowers it towards the alcohol covered top rope. Instantly the strand is engulfed in flames as flashbulbs explode like wildfire. RP: "You've got to be kidding me! It looks like JD Laredo is powerbomb Carson Nash right through that giant wall of flames." LVK: "Or right INTO it! Laredo has the waistlock on and hoists Nash into the aaaaiiir...NO! Nash is fighting it as he drives his knuckles into the temple of a bloodied JD Laredo!" [In one fluid motion, Carson Nash seizes the upper hand by forcing himself up and off the shoulders of JD Laredo, and grabbing a double handful of hair as Blackjack goes tumbling to the floor of The Savvis Center.] LVK: "MODIFIED FACEBUSTER/HOT SHOT COMB...." ************** WHOOOOOOSH ***************** RP: "SWEET MRS O'LEARY'S COW! JD LAREDO IS ON FIRE!!!!!!!" [The alcohol on the shirt of JD Laredo expodes into a ball of flames as a shocked Carson Nash slides under the bottom rope and grabs the legs of Razorfist, pressing his own knees into his shoulder. Referee Gus Moxley drops to make a count...] Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! ONE! Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! TWO! Fans: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LVK: "THANK GOD IT'S OVER!!!!!!" [Almost instantly, paramedics charge the ring to tend to both grapplers, as Carson Nash collapses to the canvas in relief. The fans continue to give a huge HARDCORE POP, lapping up the garbage-wrestling-type display they just witnessed.] LVK: The ring looks like a warzone right now. While both wrestlers receive medical attention, let's head backstage to Lindsey Catalano.... [Cut to a backstage "Caged Rage" logo and the subsequent people standing in front of it. To the left is RCW's own pinup girl Lindsey Catalano. In a black leather mini-skirt that is a skirt *in name only* and a tight pink halter top that, to the delight of the males in the Midwest Region, does a bad job of concealing _ANYTHING_, Miss Lindsay is dressed to the nines...if she was an exotic dancer of course. To the right is RCW's own "Cool Hand" Luke Kinsey, Syracuse's favorite son and a damn handsome man. Wearing khaki pants and a black button down shirt with his brown hair pulled back in a ponytail, Luke doesn't look like a total ingrate for once. Question is...why the hell is he here?] LC: Alright I'm here with one of RCW's newest competitors, Luke Kinsey. Luke what are your thoughts on RCW so far? [Luke hesitates for a second as he looks Lindsey over.] LK: I'd say it's pretty good. Free drinks in the back...hot women in the front... [There's a WINK! for you Lindsay, who blushes accordingly. Luke flashes a hundred watt smile at Lindsey as he continues.] LK: Yeah, I'm likin' it so far. LC: Then why did you attack Tommy Wyldside on Impact a while back? LK: Figures a blonde would think I... [Luke does the finger quote things.] LK:...attacked Tommy. I didn't attack him...I helped him. I did 'em a favor. See, first off I warded off them bassackward, inbred criminals for him, and then I gave him some exposure. I kicked his ass. 'Cause lets be honest...Tommy Wyldguy isn't gonna go real far in RCW. But _I_ am. So Tommy, consider yourself fa-Ahhhhhhhh!!! [Luke's scream comes from the appearance of Tommy Wyldside, who runs into shot and catches his brash young adversary with a forearm to the side of the head. Lindsey lets out a shrill scream as she jumps out of the way, and the two men begin trading blows.] TW: I ain't gonna go far huh? [A swift kick sends Kinsey crashing to the floor, and Wyldside follows up with a series of kicks and punches to the downed "Cool Hand" Luke.] TW: I'm goin' far enough to teach your wise ass that you should've stayed outa my business. [Kinsey lies slumped on the floor, and Wyldside stands over him, his long blond hair hanging in his face as he looks down at his rival.] TW: You punk-ass Johnny-come-latelies think you can make a name for yourself by Pearl Harboring whoever the hell you like. Well you picked the wrong victim buck-o. [With a final kick, Wyldside walks off, leaving Lindsey Catalano to look down at Kinsey with a melodramatic look of shock on her face.] [Fade to commercials] [Screen reopens to a pan of the hordes of screaming fans packed into the sold out Savvis Center in St Louis, and then the camera returns to Larry and Rick.] LVK: Welcome back fans! What a night this has been, and we've still got plenty more to come. In fact, our next match is one which wrestling pundits around the world are sure to be watching closely. In RCW the Gateway Heavyweight championship is fought over by the sport's rising stars. The two men who have held the belt so far - JD Laredo and current champion Vlad Stukovski - have shown that they are on a fast rise to the top. The same can be said for the two men who will challenge Stukovski in a few minutes - Jason Blake and Vincenzo Sandora. RP: Definitely, especially Mr Sandora. He's got the backing of The Outfit, and for back-up he has one of his henchmen, Jason Blake, to help him against the massive Ruski champ. LVK: It is true that Jason Blake is now an employee of The Outfit, but remember that he is doing so reluctantly, and is being forced to because of a stipulation of a match he lost. Let's take a look at some of the background between these three rising superstars, starting several weeks ago...... [Start video package.] [The first footage we get is Jason Blake and Amy Sparks in their lockerroom. Then we cut forward to three big burly men holding Blake up against a wall....] Goon: I believe you owe something to the Outfit. Jason Blake: (looks over at Amy) Ummm, I don't know what you're talking about. Goon: Don't play dumb with us Blake. Sandora sent us here to collect, now pay up, or pay the price. [splice] [The next week - Sandora and Blake in the ring, with Cyn Garibaldi and Amy Sparks beside them.] VS: Blake, I've waited long enough for you to pay your debts, and now I'm here to collect... [splice] VS: Hold on little man. I have a proposition for you. We have a match, right here, right now. You and Ms. Sparks against myself and the lovely Cynthia Garibaldi. If you win, your debt is paid. Jason Blake: And what if I don't? VS: (chuckles) Well then, if you lose, you become my personal servant, and a member of the Outfit. I can always use a kid with spunk to serve me. Do we have a deal? (smirk) I know you're the gambling type. [splice] [Later that night, during the mixed tag match. Ozzy Bates, Sandora's right-hand man, is in the ring and he grabs Amy Sparks.....] LVK: PILEDRIVER BY BATES ON SPARKS!!! I think he just killed Amy!!! RP: HOLY GUACAMOLE!!! LVK: She's not moving folks! Bates rolls Cyn onto Sparks as the referee turns around and sees the cover. Here is the count! O N E ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . T W O ! ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . T H R E E ! ! ! RP: YES!!! LVK: SANDORA AND CYNTHIA GARIBALDI WIN THE MATCH!!! [HUGE HEEL POP!!] LVK: Sandora wins, and that means that Jason Blake is now a member of the Outfit!! RP: Ha ha! At least now he can act like a real man! [splice] [The very last Impact - Sandora is challenging Stukovski for the Gateway title. Holding a metal chair in his hands, Blake stands on the apron. Sandora, seeing that Stukovski is about to unload more punishment upon him, desperately thrusts a thumb up into the big Russian's eyes. Stukovski roars in pain and brings his hands up to his eyes, and Sandora grabs him by the arm.....] LVK: Sandora sending Stukovski into the ropes....BUT STUKOVSKI REVERSES IT!! *CLAAAANG!!!* [HARDCORE POP!] RP: ARGH!!! BLAKE ACCIDENTLY HIT MR SANDORA WITH THE CHAIR!!! [splice] [The fans scream and shout in anticipation as Stukovski makes it to the top turnbuckle and teeters agonizingly, his right leg threatening to give out. He then lets out a trademark ROAR and leaps!] *KA-THUUUDD!!!* LVK: AIR VLAD!! A HUGE DIVING HEADBUTT FROM THE TOP ROPE BY THE 400-PLUS-POUND BEHEMOTH!!! RP: Is it safe? LVK: AND HERE'S THE COVER!! ONE!! TWO!!! THREEEEE!!!!!! STUKOVSKI WINS AGAIN AND RETAINS THE GATEWAY TITLE!!! RP: I hate to say it, but Mr Sandora's plans backfired horribly. Jason Blake turned out to be more of a hindrance than a help. [splice] [Stukovski after the match with Sandora, standing in the ring, an angry look on his rugged, bearded face.] Vlad: At big Kapitalist television event in six days, you vill both be granted shot at Gateway title. But you vill take belt from the People. No, you vill suffer most horrible punishment for your sins against the People, and by end of match you vill wish you had instead tried to take meat from mouth of hungry bear! [End video package.] [Fade back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: Stukovski challenged Blake and Sandora to a match for the title, and originally it was going to be a handicap match. But the RCW matchmakers have since changed it to a three-way dance. RP: Pssh, big deal. Call it what you want - it's still two on one. Stukovski is probably the most unstoppable force in wrestling at the moment, but even he can't beat the combined effort of Blake and Mr Sandora. LVK: I wish I could say I didn't agree with you Rick, but you're right. The Juggernaut from Vladivostok is up against it here tonight, and seems distracted by his work for the Russian authorities. Already tonight he attacked Wildcat Jim Lewis junior for no apparent reason, and he seemed frustrated in doing so. RP: Two-on-one, his mind not totally on the match - I'd say Stukovski's time as champion is about to come to an end tonight. Mr Sandora will make a great champion too. LVK: Well, without further ado, let's head to the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Gateway Heavyweight Championship triangle match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ [Title changes hands on any pinfall] \ TOTAL IMPACT \ Vlad "the Marxman" Stukovski (c) "CAGED RAGE" \ vs \ Vincenzo Sandora vs Jason "the Bandit" Blake \_______________________________________________________________ written by: Fletch RA: The following contest is a three-way dance, and is for the GATEWAY HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!! [pop] [The lights dim as "Carmina Burana" by Carl Orff begins to play bringing the crowd to its feet. A purple spotlight illuminates the curtains as Cynthia Garibaldi steps from behind the curtain. Her arms swoop up in the air to thousands of cheers. Cyn is wearing an elegant black evening gownish dress that sparkles. It has a high slit up the left leg and a large opening around the navel area, showing off a beatiful stomach with a piercing.] RP: HOT DAMN!! LVK: So you talk about *Mr* Sandora like you're scared that if you say the wrong thing, he'll take you swimming with concrete boots, but you openly oggle his main squeeze? RP: Um, well....Mr Sandora would understand that something that beautiful deserves to be admired. [The cheers quickly turn to boos when Vincenzo Sandora steps out behind Cyn, but not wearing his usual tear-away tuxedo suit. This time Sandora is sporting a riveting white sparkling robe. His hair is slicked back, and he has a toothpick in his mouth. He looks ready. With the boos roaring, Oswald Bates and Jason Blake then step out from behind the curtain. Ozzy is wearing black slacks, a black silk t-shirt halfway unbuttoned and a gold chain. Blake is wearing one of his freshly bought suits... black, with a white ruffled shirt and a white bowtie. Vincenzo puts his arms out in the air, then suddenly two streams of white fireworks shoots up about 30 feet on each side of the ramp. He then looks back at Blake, and eyes him forward. Blake takes the lead followed by Cyn, Sandora, and then Oz as they begin to walk towards the ring.] LVK: Blake is going to wrestle in that suit? RP: Apparently. Doesn't he look smart though? LVK: No, he looks like a Senior Prom reject, and it's all Sandora's fault! [Cynthia, once in the ring walks over to Sandora to remove his robe unveiling his plain green wrestling trunks and white kneepads and boots. Blake stands there in the corner, appearing to be wrestling in his suit. Jason and Vincenzo then await for Vlad's entrance.] RA: Introducing first.......accompanied by Ozzy Bates and the vivacious Cynthia Garibaldi..... ....representing The Outfit..... ....JASON "THE BANDIT" BLAKE and VINCENZO SANDOOOOOOOORRRAAA!!!!!! [The lights of the arena swiftly go out, drawing a rising tide of noise from the vast audience as lighters and laser pointers flicker on here and there like a field of stars. Suddenly, the darkness is pierced by a single red spotlight, which shines straight down into the center of the ring, illuminating the ring announcer as the opening brassy chords of “Thus Spake Zarathustra” echo across the arena, drawing some initial “Whoo!”s from the elder members of the audience] RA: Ladies and gentlemen of the proletariat, River City Wrestling is proud to bring to you ... standing nearly seven feet tall and weighing in at over 400 Russian grain-fed pounds ... he is the Last Soviet, the Champion of the People, and the RCW Gateway champion .... [...the audience splits into a roar of cheering and a deluge of boos as they see the RiverTron light up garishly, featuring a dignified, historical lithograph of the great economist, Karl Marx. As the trumpets come to a crescendo, they suddenly swoop into silence as Karl Marx’s head animates and speaks from the grave:] KARL MARX: VODOVEETCHA MYEST, KAPITALIST! [With that, a TREMENDOUS explosion rocks the head of the aisle, as a scarlet mushroom cloud of fire and smoke boils up just in front of the curtain. From out of this maelstrom strides the towering form of RCW Gateway champion as the Doors’ electric-guitar version of “From Russia With Love” explodes out of the PA. Vlad is clad in heavy black boots that go up to his knee, with red leather tights emblazoned with golden hammers and sickles. His cellphone is in a small case on his belt. Vlad wears a pair of black leather fingerless shootfighting gloves, and his upper body is bare. The many tattoos adorning his massive body gleam in the flaming red lights of the arena. The Gateway title is slung across his broad shoulder, and he pauses to throw back his arms and roar or raise his left fist in salute of certain members of the crowd as he strides down the aisle.] RA: VLAAAAAAAAAAAAD “THEEEEEE MAAAAAARRRRXMAAAAN” STUUUUUUUUKOOOOOOOVSKIIIIIIIIIIII! [Vlad strides down the aisle, declaiming to the People, before he comes up the ringside steps, stops on the apron, turns and ROARS, hoisting his belt high as all four ring posts BURST into golden flame. The house lights come softly back up as the Doors fade and the Russian madman steps over the ropes into the ring, depositing his cellphone with the timekeeper.] DING!!! [As referee Herman Gehl stands mid-ring, signalling for the men to begin, Sandora and Blake engage in a frantic conversation. Sandora points at Blake, then at Stukovski, then himself, and finally the corner. Blake looks upset about it.] LVK: This match has started, but for some reason Sandora and Blake are arguing. Let's just get on with it! RP: Might be last-minute strategy Van Keel. [Sandora firmly points towards mid-ring, where Stukovski is growing impatient, and then steps through the ropes to the apron.] LVK: It looks like Sandora is making Jason Blake start out against Stukovski. RP: This is one of *those* triangle matches? With tags and stuff? LVK: Yup. [Blake turns to face Sandora, still arguing his point. Stukovski has apparently run out of patience, because he lumbers over and nails Blake in the back with a clubbing forearm.] LVK: OH! Stukovski getting things underway! [Stukovski turns Blake around and fires a couple of chops into his chest. Whooo! He then whips the much smaller Blake across the ring, and doesn't even go for a move. Stukovski just stops his mammoth frame mid-ring, leaving Blake to rebound and crash into him....] LVK: Boom! Blake went down like a cyclist meeting the front of a truck! RP: Yeah, and now Stukovski's backing over him to make sure he did the job right! [Stukovski wrenches Blake to his feet and sends him into the ropes.....] LVK: BIG BOOT!!! Blake goes down hard again! Here's the cover!! ONE!! TWO!!! And kickout! RP: I know he's only been in there for a minute or so, but Blake *has* to make the tag! LVK: How? Sandora is at ringside chatting with Ozzy Bates! RP: Um, don't speak so soon - it looks like he's coming over here. LVK: What? He's meant to be wrestling! He needs to be there if Blake wants to tag out! [The camera shows Sandora sit down in a vacant chair next to Rick, and put on a headset.] RP: Mr Sandora, it's a privilege to have you here. You're looking great tonight. VS: When am I not, Ricky? You know I'm always lookin' my best. LVK: Why are you leaving Blake in there to do all the work? This is disgraceful? VS: Listen, you better watch your tone of voice or we'll have problems. As far as Blake goes, he works for me. He does what I say. [Stukovski drags Blake to his feet, lets out a gutteral roar and then simply grabs him by the head with one hand, and throws him. Blake hurtles backwards almost all the way across the ring, and lands hard on the back of his head and neck.] VS: C'mon Blake. Get up. The family is watching. RP: What's that big Commie doing now? [Stukovski again drags a very groggy Blake back to his feet......] LVK: SIDE RUSSIAN LEGSWEEP!! AND NOW A COVER!! ONE!! TWO!!!! TH-NO! Kickout again by Blake! [The fans cheer for the kickout.] LVK: Vincenzo, if you don't get in there, this match will be over very soon, and you won't be champion. Have you thought about that? VS: Mr. Van Keel, have you not learned anything thus far in my RCW tenure. Everything is well under control. [Stukovski gets up off the downed Blake and walks over to the ropes, looking down at Sandora with a mix of confusion and anger. He points at the Outfit leader and begins angrily yelling at him in Russian.] RP: I think he just called you a wuss, but I could be wrong. My Ruski isn't very good. VS: He's Russian. He doesn't even know what he is saying. [With Stukovski's attention momentarily taken away, Blake struggles to his feet and rushes him. He nails the big Russian with a forearm shot to the head, and spins him around. He attempts to send Stukovski into the ropes, but Vlad reverses it, sending Blake for the ride.....] LVK: Blake ducks under a Russian Sickle lariat attempt....rebounds again..... RP: SPINNING HEEL KICK!!! VS: Atta baby!! That's my little lackey. LVK: That stunned Stukovski, but didn't take him off his feet! But now Blake is climbing through the ropes.... [Blake climbs onto the apron, and then grabs the top rope with both hands....] LVK: OOOHHHHH!!! SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF STUKOVSKI'S HEAD, BUT STILL THE CHAMP IS STANDING!!! RP: Blake's climbing out again. Is he gonna do it again? LVK: It looks like it.....YES!!! ANOTHER ONE, BUT AGAIN STUKOVSKI REFUSES TO BE TAKEN OFF HIS FEET!!! [Stukovski looks very wobbly, teetering on the edge of falling to the mat. Blake points to the apron, bringing a huge face pop from the fans, and then climbs out again...] RP: Three? LVK: YEEESSS!!!! THIRD ONE IS THE CHARM!!!! STUKOVSKI GOES CRASHING TO THE MAT!!!!! VS: Bada-bing! LVK: Blake has the leg hooked!!! ONE!! TWO!!!! Shoulder up!! [POP!] [Blake quickly gets to his feet and rushes to the nearby corner, as Stukovski stays sprawled out on his back. Blake climbs the turnbuckles to the top rope, and then turns to face into the ring, and jumps....] LVK: CORKSCREW SPLASH FROM THE TOP ROPE!!!! BLAKE WITH THE COVER!! ONE!! TWO!!!! TH-But again the champ kicks out!!!! [MIXED POP!] RP: Mr Sandora, you might want to get in there before Blake steals all of your glory. VS: Blake knows who really will own that championship belt. LVK: Blake is showing why he would make a fine champion, if he wasn't shackled by a two-bit group of mobsters that is. VS: Van Keel, you will be seeing more of me tonight... probably around 1am. [Both men get back to their feet, and Blake strikes out with a kick aimed at Stukovski's head. Stukovski catches the foot in his right hand though. Blake quickly counters by jumping up and striking out with his other foot....] LVK: Enzuigiri by Blake.....but Stukovski ducked!! [Blake lands facefirst on the mat, and Stukovski steps over him and reaches down, hooking him in a waistlock from behind. He lifts him up with ease and swings him back as if going for a German suplex, but instead of throwing him over backwards, pendulums him back into the mat....] RP: HOLY CRAP!!! Blake's face was driven into the mat....HARD!!! LVK: Vlad's size advantage is allowing him to throw Jason Blake around like he was a child. Blake's only real hope is quick tagging with his partner. And who would that be? VS: Who hired this schmuck? Looks like I'll have to take care of this oaf myself. LVK: Stukovski with the cover! ONE!! TWO!!! TH-Shoulder up! [Stukovski takes a moment to roll away, and then drags Blake back to his feet. He nails Blake with a couple of European uppercuts, and then bodyslams him to the mat. Stukovski walks over to the nearest corner and climbs to the second turnbuckle, turning to face into the ring....] LVK: Could this be Air Vlad, the big man's falling headbutt! [Indeed it could. Timber!] RP: BUT NO!! Blake moved!!!! [The sound of a headset being taken off is heard as Stukovski and Blake both stay down on the mat. Sandora comes into the shot, climbing up onto the apron and going through the ropes into the ring.] LVK: Finally Sandora is actually going to take part in the match, but typically it isn't until Blake and Stukovski have both wrestled themselves to a standstill! RP: That's called smarts Van Keel. Let the other two idiots beat each other up, then move in and take the spoils! LVK: No, it's called cowardice. [Stukovski rolls to his feet, but doesn't see Sandora behind him.....] LVK: Sandora with a shoulderblock to the back of Stukovski's right knee! He's going back after the big man's legs, just like he did in their last match! RP: And this time Blake's not gonna screw it up for him! This time he's walking out of here with the belt! [Stukovski drops down to one knee, and then gets back to his feet. Sandora delivers another shoulder to the back of the knee, bringing a loud groan of pain from the Russian. A third shoulder drops Stukovski to the mat.] LVK: Down goes the champ, as Sandora continues this gameplan of going after the right knee of Stukovski! [Sandora grabs the right leg of the downed Stukovski, and drives his own kneecap into the side of the Russian's knee. Blake has gotten to his feet, and he looks down at Sandora, a sneer on his face. Sandora points to the corner, and Blake reluctantly walks towards it.] RP: Good to see Blake's following orders for once. LVK: What else is he supposed to do? He is being forced to pay his debt to The Outfit, whether he likes it or not. [Sandora drives the point of his knee into Stukovski's sore knee a couple of times, and then quickly slaps on....] LVK: FIGURE FOUR LEGLOCK BY SANDORA!!! RP: I don't think Stukovski'll tap out yet, but this move is more valuable for the damage it'll be doing to the Ruski's knee ligaments. LVK: Very true. [Stukovski writhes in pain as a portion of the fans start a "VLAD, VLAD" chant. Sandora grits his teeth and tries to get as much leverage on the hold as he can, but the determined look turns to one of panic as Stukovski starts rocking from side to side....] LVK: OH BOY! Stukovski trying to turn the move over, and reverse its effects! RP: Ah crap! LVK: Vlad fighting to turn it....fighting....YES!! [Face pop as Stukovski rolls over onto his stomach, and pushes up with his arms. Sandora screams in agony, and begins frantically signalling for Blake to help him. Blake doesn't move, and Sandora's signalling becomes even more frantic. Finally Blake casually climbs into the ring, walks over, gives Sandora an indignant look, and then kicks Stukovski in the side of his sore knee, breaking the hold.] LVK: Did you see how reluctant Jason Blake was to help his Outfit leader? Vincenzo Sandora won't be pleased about that at all! RP: And so he shouldn't be. Blake needs to do as he's friggin' told! [Blake is shooed from the ring by referee Herman Gehl, and both Stukovski and Sandora get to their feet gingerly. Sandora lashes out with another kick to Stukovski's sore knee, and the big Russian crumples to the mat like a big, bearded accordian. Sandora walks over and tags in Blake, and orders him to grab one of Stukovski's legs, while he grabs the other one himself.] LVK: What is Sandora planning here? RP: Double wishbone? [BIG POP! Stukovski wrenches his legs together, driving Sandora and Blake into each other with a nasty head clash. The two Outfit members drop to the mat.] LVK: Wow! That couldn't have gone much more wrong for Sandora and Blake! RP: It's all Blake's fault! LVK: Why? RP: Because....um....he's the lackey! [All three men stay down for a few more moments, before climbing back to their feet. Herman Gehl begins ushering Sandora out of the ring, as Blake and Stukovski lock up again. Stukovski sends Blake into the ropes, and catches him, lifting him up into a Gorilla press! But within seconds Stukovski drops Blake to the mat and falls to one knee.....] LVK: OH! Stukovski's right knee gave way under the pressure! RP: See, all the boring stuff pays off! [Blake climbs to his feet, and waits for Stukovski to get up. He grabs the champ's head and runs towards the nearest corner while holding onto it. Blake runs up the turnbuckles....] LVK: ACID DR-NOOOO!!! STUKOVSKI DUMPED BLAKE CROTCHFIRST ON THE TOP ROPE!!!! RP: Ouchie!!!! [As the fans "ooooohhhh!", Blake slumps off the rope to the mat, holding onto his crotch. Stukovski rubs at his knee for a moment, and then drags Blake up, before lifting him onto the top turnbuckle.] LVK: Looks like Stukovski is going for something big here.... [Stukovski grabs Blake in a front chancery, and then lifts him off the turnbuckle, falling back and driving Blake's head hard into the mat.] LVK: SUPER HIGH IMPACT DDT!!!! THIS COULD BE IT!!!! ONE!! TWO!!! THR-NOOOO!!! Sandora broke the count!!! [HEEL POP! Gehl ushers Sandora from the ring again, as Blake and Stukovski lay flat out on their backs, breathing heavily. Stukovski is the first to roll to his feet. He drags Blake up, and sends him into the ropes. As Blake hits the ropes, Sandora slaps him on the shoulder, and Gehl indicates that it was a legal tag.] LVK: Here comes Sandora back into the match! [Sandora runs straight at Stukovski, but straight into a chokehold. Stukovski roars, and lifts Sandora.....] RP: ARRRGGGHHHH! HE CHOKESLAMMED HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE ONTO THE FLOOR!!!! [Stukovski roars with laughter. Blake runs and bounces off the ropes, and comes flying off with a cross-bodyblock. But Stukovski catches him in mid-air. He falls to one knee, while holding Blake, and gets back to both feet with a grimace. With a grunt of effort, he hoists Blake into a military press.....] LVK: THE KNEE HOLDS OUT THIS TIME......AND BLAKE IS THROWN ONTO SANDORA!!! [HUGE FACE POP as Sandora gets to his feet in time to get Blake thrown onto him. They crumple to the floor. In the ring, Stukovski bends over, clutching at his knee, his chest heaving with breath. Referee Gehl slides from the ring to see to Sandora and Blake. With the official's attention taken away, a figure slides into the ring behind Stukovski.....] LVK: OZZY BATES WITH A CHAIR!!!!! *KLA-DANG!!!* [HEEL POP!! Stukovski falls flat on his face, and Bates slides from the ring again. Outside the ring, Sandora and Blake climb to their feet. Sandora starts admonishing his "lackey", and then points for him to climb onto the apron, while Sandora slides into the ring.] LVK: SANDORA COVERS!!! ONE!! TWO!!! RP: NEW CHAMP!! NEW CHAMP!! LVK: THREEEE!!!!! NO! NO!!! IT WAS ONLY TWO!!!! RP: How the hell did Stukovski kick out from that? [HUGE FACE POP for the kickout, which leaves Sandora stunned. He turns to the referee in disbelief and then drags the wobbly Stukovski over to the corner where Blake is standing, and props the big Russian up against the turnbuckles back first. He then signals for Blake to get into the ring to help him, before turning around to face the fans, holding his hands out arrogantly to a chorus of boos. As Sandora is facing away, Blake grabs Stukovski's hand and holds it up, and slaps it with his own. Referee Gehl signals at the tag is made.] RP: What's Blake doing? Tagging himself in? LVK: That's what it looks like, because he's getting into the ring. RP: I don't think Sandora saw the tag! [Sandora begins talking to Blake, and then the two of them drag Stukovski up to his feet. They leave him standing mid-ring, and both run and rebound off the ropes on opposite sides of the ring. They come running back towards Stukovski, and Blake drops down and nails a sweep kick to the back of Stukovski's legs, as Sandora simultaneously hits the Russian champ with a jumping lariat. HUGE POP!] LVK: WHAT A MOVE!!! BLAKE AND SANDORA WITH A LARIAT-LEGSWEEP COMBO AND STUKOVSKI IS DOWN AND OUT!!!! RP: PIN HIM MR SANDORA, PIN HIM!!! [But instead of going for the kill immediately, Sandora walks over to the ropes and holds his arms out with the hands turned upwards, revelling in the boos. Behind him, Blake breaks out in a huge grin, and then moves in behind Sandora.....] RP: WHAT?!?! LVK: HIGHWAY ROBBERY!!!! BLAKE HIT HIS SPINNING HEEL KICK TO THE BACK OF SANDORA'S HEAD!!!! [GIANT FACE POP!!!!] RP: NOOOO!!!!!! LVK: BLAKE HAS TURNED HIS BACK ON THE OUTFIT!!!! RP: Cyn's getting up on the apron!!! [HUGE POP!] LVK: BUT HERE COMES AMY SPARKS!!!! [The pop continues as Amy drags Cyn off the apron and slaps the taste out of her mouth. Cyn goes down like a sinking rock, and Amy jumps on her and grabs her by the hair, wrenching her about.] RP: Chick fight - which I would normally be loving, but....Blake turned against Mr Sandora!!!! LVK: Sandora didn't know that *Blake* is the legal man, not Stukovski!! And now BLAKE IS HEADING TO THE TOP ROPE!!!! [ANTICIPATION POP as Blake reaches the top, turns to face into the ring, thrusts his arms out and then leaps.....] LVK: BLINDSIIIIIIDDDDEEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLINDSIDER ON VINCENZO SANDORA!!!! [DEAFENING FACE POP!!] RP: NO! NO! NO!!! LVK: BLAKE HOOKS THE LEG!!! ONE!!! TWO!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! BLAKE WINS!!!! BLAKE IS THE NEW CHAMPION!!!!!! [DEAFENING POP! The fans are on their feet and cheering like crazy, as Blake rolls off of Sandora, and Amy Sparks jumps into the ring to congratulate him. She climbs on top of Blake and begins peppering his sweaty and tired face with kisses.] RP: DAMN! Now *that* is better than any damn title! [Stukovski, too late to break the count, rolls from the ring, a look of disappointment on his face. He grabs his cellphone, pushes a few buttons, and listens....] LVK: Stukovski can't believe he lost. He lost the title, even though he wasn't pinned, which has to be very frustrating for the big Russian. [Suddenly the sound of a telephone ringing is heard throughout the arena as the RiverTron comes to life.] RP: What the...? [A look of confusion comes over Stukovski. We cut to the RiverTron to see an unknown person answering a cell phone in Russian.] LVK: Wait a second! Look, on the RiverTron! RP: I don't know who that is, but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that's who Stukovski's been calling up out here after each and every match! Could that be the great Kommissar Byelin!? Is that the man whose orders Stukovski follows!? [A familiar voice is heard off camera on the RiverTron.] Voice: Man, I've been waiting quite a while for this! Now, tell that overgrown idiot, that Kommissar Byelin says his services are NO LONGER REQUIRED! [The unknown person translates into the cell phone. We cut to a shot of Stukovski who appears to be very confused looking at the RiverTron.] RP: Kommissar Byelin just gave Stukovski the boot!? [Hysterical laughter is heard coming from the man off camera on the RiverTron. The camera pans right to reveal Michael White standing next to the Russian translator on the cell phone. White is laughing hysterically and slapping his knee. White gathers himself and says..] MW: Kommissar Byelin speaking!! LVK: WHITE IS BYELIN!!! [He bursts into laughter again. At ringside Stukovski has begun breathing very heavily, face turning red, he looks as though he's about to blow.] MW: Vlad, I've got to hand it to you, you've served me well. You see, I'm a busy man. I've got lots to do, and there are only 24 hours in a day, which is where you my big Russian friend came in, and where Kommissar Byelin was born. [Pause.] MW: ShadowRunner... didn't like him. J.D. Laredo... didn't, still don't like him. Jason Blake the same. "Wildcat" Jim Lewis Jr... can't STAND HIM!! Are any of these names ringing bells? I know you're a little slow, so I'll spell it out for you. These are all guys you've taken care of...why? Cause they're guys I didn't like, but didn't have time to take care of myself! [White laughs again, really enjoying it.] MW: ..That attack on Lewis, that was a little insurance policy for tonight's matchup, man that was such a good idea! I AM good, you gotta admit it! [Vlad starts pacing as if not knowing what to do with himself.] MW: To cut a long story short, I used you. I saw big dumb Russian coming a mile away, and Kapitalized on it with a K!! HAHA!!!! [White laughs it off.] MW: Anyway, you've taken care of everyone on my list, so your services are no longer required. I hope we can still be friends, what d'ya say? [Vlad stares up at the screen, his eyes going blank and the cellphone dropping quietly from his hands to thunk into the mat. His jaw goes slack, and he simply gazes up at the RiverTron.] RP: Oh, boyyy .... LVK: Fans, I don’t know what to tell you about this. Michael White has just ... just ... not just made Vlad Stukovski into a fool, but ... torn apart his whole world .... RP: The big guy’s about to snap, Van Keel, and not in any sort of funny way. Is security standing by? LVK: I hope so, Rick .... [Vlad puts his head down and his shoulders tense and visibly shake. With not a further word or gesture, Vlad steps over the top rope and marches to the back, slowly, his head down and his fists clenched so tight that small drops of blood patter down from his hands.] MW: Is that a yes? Wait a second.. where is he going!? WHERE'D HE!? OH NO!! LET'S GO!! LVK: Oh ... oh, my .... RP: Michael White better not only leave this building, but this *State*, because he's got a Rhino-sized pissed off Ruski looking for him! [With Stukovski gone from the ring, and the interruption by White over, "Da Rockwilder" by Method Man and Redman begins to play over the PA, and Blake is handed the Gateway title belt, to a huge pop from the fans. He hoists the belt into the air, and embraces Amy Sparks.] LVK: There's your new Gateway Heavyweight Champion!! Jason Blake joins the list of prestigious titleholders here in RCW!!! [A few feet away from the celebration, Sandora climbs to his feet, holding his head, and begins frantically signalling towards the entranceway.] RP: What's Mr Sandora doing? [Suddenly, out of the entranceway bursts two figures, who sprint down the aisle. A confused pop rings around the arena as the two men - both average sized, one African-American and one with an Italian look to him - reach the ring and jump in.....] LVK: WHO ARE THESE TWO MEN?! RP: I recognise one of them! That's Johnny Bonnaducci!! LVK: The guy who was World Champ up north? RP: That's him! [Bonnaducci and the unidentified man grab Blake and start laying into him with punches and kicks. Blake, tired after his epic match, doesn't offer much resistance, falling to the mat under the barrage of blows. Amy Sparks screams and begins yelling, until Cyn Garibaldi grabs her by the feet and drags her from the ring.] LVK: Wait! I recognise the other one! That's Tyrone Parker!!! But why are Parker and Bonnaducci attacking Blake? Are they associated with the Outfit? [Bonnaducci and Parker continue to stomp on Blake, who is now not moving, as trash starts to fire into the ring, and the boos are deafening. Sandora joins them, a determined scowl on his face.] RP: Blake doesn't look like much of a champ huh? LVK: He was beaten down by two fresh men! What is Sandora doing now? He's got the Gateway title belt, and....he's giving it to Parker?! [Parker takes the belt and slaps it over his right shoulder. The three men then stand over Blake, angrily posing, as the HEEL POP continues. Finally they decide that their work is done, and they all leave the ring, joining Ozzy Bates and Cyn Garibaldi in the aisle. Amy Sparks, tears streaming down her face, slides into the ring and flops onto the still form of her love, Jason Blake.] RP: I guess this means that Jason Blake's employment in The Outfit is terminated LVK: What? HE QUIT!! By pinning Sandora he showed that he *won't* be an Outfit patsy anymore! But anyway, moving along, and next up we're supposed to have Michael White taking on Wildcat Jim Lewis junior, but if Stukovski has gotten his hands on White backstage, I don't like his chances of wrestling tonight. [The camera goes back to Larry and Rick at ringside.] RP: Nah, Michael White will be fine. He's got security and stuff. LVK: Well, anyway, this feud between White and Lewis is another long-standing one, going back to the very first Total Impact supercard in November 2000, when White and the Upstarts faction cost Wildcat a match with Alex Extreme. A tournament match in which Extreme went on to win the National title. RP: Boo-hoo. Sour grapes. LVK: From that point on White and Lewis have waged a brutal war against each other, taking every opportunity possible to take shots at each other. They have interfered in each other's matches, brawled all over buildings, and had a few matches against each other, mainly team matches. Those matches have gone either way, but tonight they will settle the score once and for all. RP: Michael White will settle the score you mean. LVK: So you seem to think. I, along with a lot of fans, think that White's games and trickery has gone on for long enough, and that he's going to be taught a lesson by the Australian Wildcat tonight. Anyway, let's head to the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Grudge match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ "Wildcat" Jim Lewis jr TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ "Cruiserweight Delegate" Michael White \________________________________________________________________ written by: Chris H [The screen switches to show the Ring Announcer standing in the ring and ready to introduce the wrestlers.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this is a one-fall, Grudge Match! [Major Crowd Pop.] RA: Introducing first...A member of the "Upstarts" and a self proclaimed "American Role Model", here is... "C R U I S E R W E I G H T D E L E G A T E" M I C H A E L W H I T E ! ! ! [A Secret Service Agent walks down the aisle and quickly surveys the area.] [Suddenly, "Politician" by Creme blares throughout the arena as "Cruiserweight Delegate" Michael White comes walking down the aisle, followed by two other Secret Service agents. White is shirtless, wearing Regal-esque tights, black in color, with "White 2001" in baby blue on the back. He also has on baby blue boots w/ white laces, and matching baby blue wristbands. White, surrounded by Secret Service agents, enters the ring to a chorus of 'boos'. White works the crowd by simultaneously holding both arms out as if he is accepting the love of the fans, which is actually a pelting of boos and jeers. White shrugs it off and gestures for his "Secret Service" to leave the ring.] RP: He looks focused! Just like a man who is about to rule the RCW! LVK: Well he is confident because Lewis took quite a beating backstage. That is the reason he is confident! RP: Well White knows that he can beat Lewis, but any advantage is welcome. LVK: Spoken like a true fan of the Upstarts. RP: Indeearooni I am! Those guys are the best group of wrestlers that any league has ever seen. I only wish I was still an active wrestler so I could be in that group. LVK: If you were active, I would guarantee that they wouldn't want you. RP: How do you know that? LVK: [groans loudly] Just give it up and get to this match! Wildcat is coming out now! [The Ring Announcer raises the mic back to his mouth and continues.] RA: And his opponent... PA SYSTEM: ***THE HUNTING SEASON IS IN...............*** RA: Weighing in at 235 pounds and hailing from Brisbane, Australia. Tonight he faces one of his most hatred rivals in RCW. He is known as the "King of the Air" and the "Master of the Tiger's Claw". Please welcome.... ./\ /\ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ / \------/ \ \ /\ / | | | \ / /_\ | | | /\ /\ \ / \/ \/ _|_ |_ |_/ \_ / \ | _/ _|_ / \/ \ .\ <> <> / \ / _ _ _ _ __ \ / | |_ \ /\ / | |_ | |__| \____/ |__ |_ \/ \/ | _| _/ | \ [] [The lights dim as "Eye of the Tiger" from Rocky III starts playing. Two green spotlights focus on the entrance as the silhouette of American Champion "Wildcat" Jim Lewis Jr. appears. Wildcat takes a couple of steps forward and raises his arms in the air, immediately restoring light to the arena and bringing the crowd to their feet.] [He wears long green pants and a short sleeved green shirt with Wildcat printed on it in gold. On his head, he wears a green and gold bandanna and dark sunglasses cover his face. His hair is shaped into a "buzz cut" and his face if filled with a very serious. He walks to the ring without a smile on his face and slaps the hands of his "Wildcubs". Along the way he never takes his eyes off Michael White, his hate filled glare seems to shoot straight into White's soul. When he makes it to the ring, he gingerly steps through the ropes, wincing slightly as he bends his back.] LVK: Lewis looks like that attack might not have hurt him as bad as we thought! RP: He is trying to hide it, but the first time that his ribs, back, or knee takes a bump he won't be able to hide it any longer. That's when White will strike! LVK: Well both men seem ready to fight as the referee has finished his instructions. RP: Here we go! DING! DING!! DING!!! LVK: The buildup for this one has been ongoing for awhile and now that bell means this situation will begin to see resolution! White and Lewis are circling each other trying to find that perfect point of contact. RP: The perfect point of contact is Lewis' leg. That leg can't be a hundred percent after the attack earlier. LVK: That's true, Rick. These two men have the crowd's full attention as you can hear the fans fully behind the "Wildcat" RP: Well the fans are idiots for sucking up to that punkhead loser. LVK: They lock up and neither man can seem to get an advantage. RP: Watch Lewis Ref, he tends to pull hair in these situations! LVK: He does not do anything of the sort Rick! The two men break the lock-up and Michael White raises his arms and taunts Lewis as if that broken tie-up actually means something. RP: It does mean something. LVK: What? RP: It means he already has Lewis outclassed as the true delegate of RCW! LVK: They lock up again and White immediately grabs Lewis and performs an arm and carry takeover...LEWIS TAKES HIS LEGS DURING THAT MOVE AND CREATES A LEG SCISSORS SUBMISSION HOLD! RP: See! I know he is cheating! I just detected hair pulling right off the bat! LVK: You did not! That was Lewis showing his mat skills as he holds White's neck trapped between his knees. He is trying to cut off his breath and force him to tap! RP: Like that will happen this early on. LVK: White flips up to his feet and right out of the hold and he motions for Lewis to come at him. This man's cockiness knows no bounds! RP: Well he knows just how good he is, and I think you should give him more credit for his escape than you did. LVK: Lewis stands to his feet and he is still rubbing that rib area. We have already seen that he is tender there, as well as his lower back and left knee. That attack was brutal. RP: It sure was, but the stupid guy asked for every bit he received! LVK: They circle each other and finally lock up! Lewis quickly around to a waist lock and he lifts White INTO A BELLY-TO-BACK TAKEDOWN! Lewis is holding onto that waist lock! RP: He's pulling tights! LVK: Lewis is trying to lift for another move, but White is fighting and staying on the mat. They almost look like amateur wrestlers out there Rick. RP: Indeedarooni they do, but I don't think that either man will stay with this early wearing down strategy. This match will be won by high impact air moves. No doubt in my mind. LVK: Referee forces the break as White complains about his tights being pulled. RP: I told you Lewis was a punkhead cheater! LVK: The referee is warning Lewis a White just chuckles and acts all upset about the "incident". Finally the referee moves out of the way and they lock up! This time it is White who gets the advantage on Lewis! RP: Waist lock by White was just flawless! He lifts for the BELLY-TO-BACK TAKEDOWN!!! Anything Jim can do, Michael can do better! LVK: This battle of one-upsmanship is on going as White manages to get Lewis to his feet while holding that waist lock.....Lewis reverses into a Waist lock of his own! White just lunges forward and drops to the match sending LEWIS FLYING THROUGH THE ROPES AND TO THE FLOOR! RP: White has such a presence of mind here! LVK: Not only that, but he has the attention of the referee as well as his Secret Service guards come over and begin stomping on the fallen Lewis! This is ridiculous! RP: This is perfect strategy! [The fans are booing madly as the Secret Service agents attack a grounded Lewis.] LVK: The Secret Service agents are just beating Lewis senseless! Finally the referee turns around and Lewis is trying to make it back to his feet. RP: Let's go Cubbie-boy! Get in the ring and take your whipping like a man! LVK: Lewis manages to get to his knees and White reaches and pulls him by his hair! White pulls Lewis back into the ring and stands him in the corner and SLAPS THE TASTE OUT OF HIS MOUTH! RP: That woke him up! LVK: Lewis looks like a train just hit him and he is ticked! RP: Who knew the Boy Scout had a temper like this? LVK: Lewis steps towards White and they go to lock up, but White ducks under and wrenches Lewis' left arm into a standing hammerlock. He is really wrenching that arm back! RP: And no ropes to grab with them now standing in the center of the ring! That is intelligence. LVK: I can't disagree with that. Lewis reverses the hammerlock into a hammerlock of his own...White turns it into a drop toe hold that sends Lewis crashing to the mat! RP: What skills these two are showing! LVK: White quickly over to a side headlock. That just wrenches the back with Lewis still laying face first on the mat! RP: Indeedarooni it does! LVK: Lewis quickly jerks out of the headlock and takes White's left arm and wrenches it back into a hammer lock! White is pinned on the mat in that hammerlock! RP: That is just evidence of him cheating! LVK: Lewis holds onto that hammerlock and kicks himself into the air....HE DRIVES HIS KNEE RIGHT INTO THAT ELBOW JOINT! Lewis is trying to take out a little punishment on White! Lewis raises the arm into a standing armbar. RP: He is cheating I know it! LVK: Lewis jerks that arm down and seems to be ripping up that shoulder joint! It seems he is trying to wear down certain parts of Michael White to even the match up a bit. RP: Well he can try, but the match was won before we ever got here Van Keel! That I know without a shadow of a doubt! LVK: Lewis twists that arm again and jerks down...WHITE ROLLS THROUGH AND FLIPS TO HIS FEET REVERSING INTO AN ARMBAR OF HIS OWN! RP: He jerked Lewis to the mat! That'll help those ribs alot! LVK: Lewis' ribs are exposed now as White holds that arm straight up over Jim's head. Very bad situation right now for "Wildcat". RP: AWWW! Poor Pussycat! LVK: White rubs his boot on Lewis' forehead as he wrings that wrist in the standing armbar! That was just a mean thing to do! RP: Wake up already! You think White is a nice guy? LVK: White with an Irish Whip into the corner! Lewis grabs the ropes and actually kicks his legs up avoiding a charging White! Lewis grabs the waist and yanks back into a roll up cover! Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: That was close! LVK: It sure was! Lewis nearly beat Michael White right there! He showed his veteran mind right there as he lured White in for a near fall. RP: White is right back to his feet and he ties up with Lewis again! He won't give up! LVK: Armdrag takedown by Lewis! RP: He yanked the hair! Lewis pulled his hair! LVK: He did not! RP: Yes he did! How else can you explain Lewis pulling that armdrag out of nowhere? LVK: Uh......skill? RP: You utterly suck! LVK: Lewis holding that armbar now. He is sitting with White's body lying on the mat back first. Lewis is really putting pressure on that elbow joint. RP: Cheating Aussie Punkhead! LVK: Hey, that was uncalled for! RP: I call them like I see them! LVK: Lewis lifts White up and turns that armbar into a hammerlock. He holds that arm tight behind White's back. WHITE WITH AN ELBOW THRUST! RP: He broke the hold! LVK: White runs into the rope and rebounds with a shoulderblock that sends Lewis to the mat! RP: Now his skill is showing! LVK: White runs to the ropes and steps over Lewis' body as Jim stands to his feet! Jim Leapfrogs over a rebounding White and drops to his back... [White rebounds right into the feet of Lewis. Lewis flips White over in a pseudo monkey flip that causes White to have his legs hit the bottom rope. White staggers up to his feet again as Lewis rebounds off the ropes towards him.] RP: HOLY GUACAMOLE!!! I thought he was headed out of the ring! LVK: HE HAS NOW!!! LEWIS WITH A LARIAT THAT SENDS MICHAEL WHITE OVER THE TOP ROPE AND TO THE ARENA FLOOR!!! RP: My Goodness! LVK: White is outside the ring as the fans go nuts for Jim Lewis, Jr.! RP: That punkhead cheater should be in jail for stealing a career from a REAL wrestler! LVK: White looks like he is walking away from the ring! RP: Fat Chance! LVK: Lewis slides out and grabs White. He rushes him towards the ring and just whips him back into the ring! RP: That idiot is lucky the secret service wasn't there to grab him. LVK: That's true. Lewis really opened himself up there and got lucky to get away with it. Lewis is yelling at White to stand up and fight like a man and the fans are really behind him! RP: Like that stupid punkhead can talk about being a man! LVK: White stands up and faces Lewis. He slaps Lewis across the face! Lewis smacks White right back across the face! White swings a right hand, but Lewis ducks and stuns him with a right hand of his own! Lewis quickly grabs White and drops him in a schoolboy roll-up! Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: White escapes again! I can't believe the resiliency Michael White is showing! LVK: He is proving he belongs with the best in RCW, that is for certain. Lewis didn't waste any time getting right back on White's left elbow with that armbar. RP: White will be lucky to ever use that arm again! LVK: Lewis is really extending that elbow! You almost think he could snap it like a twig if he really wanted to. RP: The jerk probably wants to permanently injure a wrestler as fine as Michael White too. He can't stand being in there with guys that are better than him, which unfortunately includes the entire roster. Well, except for Andy Leigh of course. LVK: Lewis sits White up and pulls that arm up straight behind his head! Lewis is working that shoulder area again! RP: He is trying to injure this poor man! Somebody stop him! LVK: White reaches up and tries to grab the mask of Lewis, but the referee jerks his hand away. Good job refereeing tonight! He seems to know what he is doing! RP: He just took away an attempt to break the hold and you call that good? What planet are you from? LVK: Obviously a logical one. RP: Says you. LVK: Lewis just made the mistake of letting White shift around a bit and untwist that arm! White to his feet and he grabs the hair of Lewis away from the referee's sight! RP: That is how you even the score! LVK: White uses that cheating grasp of hair to force Lewis into the ropes! White misses a lariat and Lewis grabs the arm and floats over for a crucifix takedown roll up! RP: No! LVK: Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: Lewis yanked his hair to get him down to the mat! LVK: I never saw that, especially with both of his arms wrapped around White's left arm! He do it with his feet? RP: Shut up! LVK: White ducks a lunging attempt at a tie up by Lewis and whips Lewis into the ropes...SPINNING LEG LARIAT! White just sent Lewis to the mat hard! RP: The man is a superstar already! LVK: Michael White begins stomping on Lewis! He stomps on that lower back and ribs! This is not good! RP: White knows where this punkhead is weak! LVK: MICHAEL WHITE IS A MAN POSSESSED!!! He is stomping Lewis and all Lewis can do is try and roll away to protect his vulnerable areas! RP: Which is tough to do when there is such a large area that is prone to pain! LVK: Lewis finally rolls under the ropes and gets kicked out of the ring by White! Lewis' weaknesses have finally been exposed after over seven minutes of action! RP: And that will spell the end of the match for Lewis. Little Wildcub's career is about over! LVK: White slides out of the ring and sizes Lewis up. This is gonna be bad! He pulls Lewis up and yanks his head towards the ringpost! He scoops him up for a powerslam...BUT RAMS HIM BACK FIRST INTO THAT STEEL RING POST!!! Has he no decency?!?! RP: Michael White is just being methodical now! He will systematically tear him apart! LVK: No matter how painful it is, we know Lewis will never give up. He will never submit, even if it meant death! RP: Well that doesn't make him brave. LVK: What do you think it makes him? RP: Stupid! LVK: White slides Lewis back into the ring and slides in after him. He sets Lewis up in the corner and gives him a jab to the forehead! White grabs Lewis and whips him HARD INTO THE OPPOSITE CORNER! Lewis hit and just bounced to the mat with force! RP: White knows he has Wildcat almost broken now! He can smell victory! LVK: White steps back and lands a big kick to the ribs of Jim Lewis, jr.! Lewis' breathing HAS to be hampered now! RP: Indeedarooni it does! White kicks him again and again! This is a party now! LVK: Lewis is really taking a beating to those ribs and lower back and Michael White is not only administering the beating, but he is ENJOYING it! RP: He sure is, and who wouldn't enjoy kicking the crap out of a punkhead like Lewis? LVK: White pulls Lewis up and whips him into the ropes...TILT-A-WHIRL BACKBREAKER! Look at the smile on White's face as he shoves Lewis off his knee! The fans are giving him all the boos he can handle now! RP: Lewis isn't moving very much at all. That might have been it for him! White could probably get a pinning victory right now, but I think he should punish him a little more. LVK: Well he seems to agree with you. White over and he kicks Lewis again in those ribs! Lewis is now lying flat on his face on the mat! White steps over him and grabs the arms...COBRA CLUTCH!!! RP: White is going for it all right now! He is going to make the cub cry out for the end of the match! LVK: White is leaning WAY back on this one and you can see him yelling at Lewis to give up. Lewis' eyes are closed and he must be trying to focus past the pain. RP: Either that or he is saying his final prayer before he passes on! LVK: Stop that! The referee continues to ask Lewis if he gives up and also checking to make sure that the chinlock White has on him in this move isn't too close to a chokehold. RP: Who cares? The man-child is a loser and should be smart enough to ask for the end of this punishment! LVK: Lewis' arms are bent way back, but we see him making fists as he musters his strength to barely shake his head no at the referee! The crowd is urging him to stay in this match! [CROWD: LET'S GO WILDCAT! LET'S GO WILDCAT!] RP: Morons! LVK: LEWIS GETS TO A KNEE! The crowd is almost deafening right now as Lewis STANDS TO HIS FEET!!! RP: White will not let go of lock he has on Lewis' head! LVK: Lewis with an elbow to the midsection of White! And another breaks the hold!!! Lewis runs to the ropes and steps over the dropped down White. Lewis rebounds and White catches him WITH A MASSIVE POWERSLAM!!! [Crowd erupts in boos.] RP: What a counter! Michael White is the man! LVK: White hooks the leg and goes for a cover! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... [Crowd just explodes in cheers as Wildcat kicks out at the last second.] RP: HOW DID HE KICK OUT OF THAT?!?!?! LVK: White seems disgusted with the referee as he pulls Lewis to his feet. Lewis with a knife-edged shop! [CROWD: WHOOOOOOO!!!] RP: Another chop! White is going to work on this boy! LVK: White whips Lewis acr...REVERSAL BY LEWIS! White hits the corner and leaps to the second turnbuckle, propelling himself back towards Lewis in A HIGH CROSS BODY!!! TOO MUCH MOMENTUM AS LEWIS ROLLS THROUGH IT AND GETS A PIN ATTEMPT! Here is the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: WHITE ESCAPES!!! The man has nine lives! LVK: And he has used four of them here tonight already! White gets out of the pin and Lewis seems spent. I think he used up all his energy to fight back just then! RP: White is just driving his knee into the back of Lewis! This is amazing! LVK: White quickly straddles Lewis and grabs his head from behind and driving that right knee into his back. What a submission move here by Michael White! RP: Indeedarroni! He is using that back injury to its fullest advantage! LVK: The referee tells White to break that hold because he had let it drop into a chokehold! RP: The referee is cheating for Lewis now! LVK: That is a good call. White grabs Lewis and tosses him over the top rope! Well this is an obvious attempt to hurt Lewis! White grabs the referee and starts yelling at him! RP: He feels that the referee was a jerk for forcing the break of that hold! LVK: That and he has to get the referee to turn his back so his "Secret Service" can do their dirty work! RP: Well everything has a perk! LVK: The secret Servicemen are stomping down on Lewis. One of them picks up Lewis and the other grabs a leg...SPIKE PILEDRIVER ON THE CEMENT FLOOR!!! Lewis seems as if he is convulsing on the floor! This is so twisted! RP: This is great! Lewis will never wrestle again after this night! LVK: The Secret Servicemen walk away from Lewis as the Aussie tries to get himself to his feet. He just can't get himself up at all! RP: White is just waiting for the punkhead in the ring. LVK: Lewis manages to get to his knees as he had his arms resting on the apron. He continues to try and get up, but that lower back and neck must be jammed up after that spike piledriver. RP: Indeedarooni it is, and I hope he doesn't make it back into the ring! LVK: White reaches over the top rope and grabs Lewis by the mask and pulls him up onto the apron! He gets Lewis standing on the apron and hooks him for the vertical suplex and he lifts him up....REVERSED BY LEWIS! RP: No! LVK: Lewis grabs for a waist lock....reversed by White into a waist lock of his own....BRIDGING BACK SUPLEX!!! White bridges it into a pin attempt! Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: That referee is a loser who can't count! LVK: White is incensed at the referee for that count. He is yelling that the match should be over. RP: Well it should. Michael has a point right there! LVK: White finally turns from the referee and just drops a legdrop right onto the back of the neck. As if Lewis hasn't got enough problems with his back and ribs, that neck is in trouble after that piledriver on the outside. RP: Every time Lewis looks like he might make it out of a jam, White just uses one of those little problem areas to regain control. He is the master! LVK: White pulls Lewis up quickly and sets him up for a vertical suplex. Here it comes...blocked by Lewis! Blocked again by Lewis! RP: Come on referee! He's pulling the tights! LVK: Lewis quickly uses the position and leverage to roll White into a pin combination! Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . tw... RP: White just powered out of that one. LVK: Well it seems that Lewis might just finally be running out of energy to stay in this match. He couldn't even hold that roll up for a full two count and that is bad considering how locked up the pin was. RP: Exactly, which tells me that White is just about to finish this one off! LVK: White pulls him up to his feet and drills a European Uppercut that jars Lewis backward! White grabs Lewis and whips him...REVERSED BY LEWIS! Lewis catches the rebounding White and lifts....WHIRL-AROUND REVERSAL BY WHITE!!! RP: INTO A PILEDRIVER!!! LVK: Lewis has been driven down into the mat headfirst by Michael White's Piledriver! Look at him gloat and make motions that this is the end of the match! RP: He knows what he is doing! Michael White has Lewis beaten and destroyed. He is just taking his time on the embarrassing end for Lewis. I love it! LVK: White is climbing the corner and looks like he wants to go for a diving headbutt. He perches the top turnbuckle and holds his arms out! He leaps! LEWIS MOVED!!! LEWIS MOVED!!! RP: Why did he try that?!?! LVK: BOTH MEN ARE DOWN AND THE REFEREE MUST PERFORM THE COUNT!!! [REFEREE: ONE!] [REFEREE: TWO!] [REFEREE: THREE!] RP: This is a travesty! White has just been grounded with the wind knocked out of him and the referee decides to count? [REFEREE: FOUR!] LVK: That's what he's supposed to do! Both men are stirring now, but neither has made it up yet. [REFEREE: FIVE!] [REFEREE: SIX!] [REFEREE: SEVEN!] RP: WHITE IS UP!!! He made it up to his feet! LVK: Lewis is up and White immediately turns around and lunges at Lewis...Lewis grabs White..ATOMIC DROP!!! White is staggering and Lewis rebounds off the ropes with a FLYING FOREARM THAT SENDS WHITE TO THE MAT!!! He hooks the leg for a cover! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: HOLY GUACAMOLE! White escapes again! These two are waging War! LVK: Lewis has his second wind now and he pulls White up to his feet. Lewis with an Irish Whip into the ropes...HUGE FIST TO THE MID-SECTION BY LEWIS! White just had his wind knocked out again and Lewis rushes over and grabs him...RUSSIAN LEGSWEEP!!! RP: White is taking a beating now and it just shouldn't happen. Lewis is pulling hair too. Did you see how he snapped White's head back? LVK: White is down and out as Lewis climbs the corner! I think he is going to close this one out! RP: This idiot couldn't close a door! LVK: Huh? RP: It's an expression! LVK: Wildcat leaps...FROG SPLASH!!! He nailed it! White might be done for good as Lewis hooks the leg and goes for the win! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: Michael White is the greatest! He gets out of the pin again! LVK: Both men are giving it their all and you can see that nether man wants to allow the other to end up on top of this match! Lewis stands and pulls White to his feet. White almost look dead on his feet here Rick. RP: Indeedarooni he does, this one is very much up for grabs. LVK: Lewis kicks White....WHITE GRABS THE FOOT!!! Lewis hops twice and NAILS AN ENZUIGIRI THAT FLOORS MICHAEL WHITE!!! RP: White can't catch a break! LVK: Lewis over and he grabs the legs. He is going for a submission move! Lewis reaches for the other leg to set up a Sharpshooter...WHITE JABS HIM IN THE EYE! RP: The man knows a thousand escapes! LVK: And all of them are dirty cheating escapes! RP: Hey, whatever works to save your skin is what I say! LVK: White reaches around and immediately goes for a Texas Cloverleaf submission, but Lewis kicks him away and into the corner where White falls down after the impact! Wow! RP: This one is now just a matter of who wants it more! LVK: White is back to his feet and Lewis rushes to him. White ducks a chop and jabs Lewis in the throat with his thumb! Lewis staggers away holding his throat! RP: This is great! LVK: That was dirty! White stands behind Lewis and leaps into the air...HE TAKES HIS LEGS AND PERFORMS A ROLL-UP INTO A COVER ATTEMPT! RP: YES!!! Here's the count! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THREE!!!?!?!?!?! LVK: LEWIS KICKED OUT! RP: HIS HAND HIT THREE!!! IT DID! IT DID! LVK: White slides out of the ring and goes nuts! The Secret Servicemen quickly surround him and try to comfort him in not gaining the victory right there. Lewis is up and he just stares at them. RP: White is protected right now. He wouldn't da...HOLY GUACAMOLI!!! LVK: LEWIS JUST PROPELLED HIMSELF OVER THE TOP ROPE AND INTO A PLANCHA THAT TAKES DOWN ALL FOUR MEN AT RINGSIDE!!! White and his three Secret Servicemen are down!!! RP: Lewis is not just a punkhead, he is a psychopathic moron! LVK: This match has gone outside the ring again folks and the two men waging war just don't care where they do battle! RP: Indeedarooni they don't, not one bit! LVK: LEWIS IS CLUTCHING HIS LEFT KNEE!!! RP: This is great! He must have hurt it on that plancha! LVK: The referee is yelling at the recovering Secret Servicemen to back off and let Lewis alone. RP: White is up! It's always good when your henchmen take the main brunt of an aerial attack for you. LVK: It sure is! The question now is can he make it back into the ring? RP: Sure! Michael White is up to his feet already! LVK: No, I meant Lewis. His knee looks like it could be messed up. White pulls Lewis up and rolls him into the ring and slides in after him! RP: I bet he hasn't even noticed Lewis clutching that knee at all. He might not even know that the match could be over with one good twist! LVK: Yes he does! Lewis stands and White kicks his leg out from under him! He grabs that left leg and snaps it backward! He is trying not to just damage the knee, but the hamstring as well! RP: Total devastation for sure! LVK: Michael White showing just how devious he is right now! White grabs Lewis' leg and pulls it towards the corner! He wouldn't?!?! RP: Yes he would! LVK: White slides out and grabs the leg and he SLAMS THE KNEE RIGHT INTO THE SIDE OF THAT STEEL RING POST!!! That knee is messed up for sure! RP: And Lewis may never be the same after this match. The Wildcat might have just been destroyed! LVK: WHITE SLAMS THE LEG AGAIN AND THE CROWD GOES BALLISTIC AGAINST MICHAEL WHITE! RP: What do they know? Its obvious true greatness is in that ring now and these fans don't have a clue about it! LVK: White pulls Lewis to his feet and Lewis staggers away limping horribly! RP: Look at White! (chuckles) LVK: White is mocking the limp of Jim Lewis, Jr.! How asinine is that?!?! RP: That is true comedy inside a wrestling match! LVK: Lewis staggers into a corner and White kicks at that knee again! He grabs the leg of Lewis and yanks him INTO A DRAGON SCREW LEGWHIP!!! White rolls through and holds onto the leg lock! RP: Michael White is a true warrior. He is the future of RCW for sure. LVK: White sets the leg out straight and jumps to drive a knee right into the kneecap! Lewis may never walk right again! RP: Which is fine because he NEVER wrestled right! LVK: Michael White grabs the leg and pulls it up high and he locks in a half crab submission hold! RP: This is it! There is no way Lewis can hold out now! Just look at the pressure White is putting on that knee! LVK: The referee is asking Lewis if he wants to continue or give up. Lewis keeps screaming no and vigorously shaking his head. The crowd is giving him encouragement all the way here in St. Louis! [CROWD: WILDCAT! WILDCAT!] RP: White is wrenching that hold in hard and leaning back to stretch that muscle. This match is about over! LVK: Wildcat refuses to give in and the crowd is getting even louder! RP: Why is he letting Wildcat so close to those ropes. He almost has a hold of one! LVK: WILDCAT REACHES THE ROPES!!! Lewis manages to force the break of the hold and White is simply dynamic right now! He whips Lewis across the ring and Lewis hits the corner with a sharp thud! RP: That was pure power! LVK: White stalks Lewis now. He picks him up and goes to whip him acr...REVERSAL BY LEWIS! Lewis runs to the adjacent ropes and catches a rebounding White in A RUNNING BULLDOG!!! What a combination!!! Lewis is back in control! RP: White isn't done yet, not by a long shot! LVK: Lewis pulls White up and whips him ac...REVERSAL BY WHITE! White puts his head down too early and Lewis rebounds and grabs him! Lifting INTO A PILEDRIVER!!! RP: HOW DID HE DO THAT?!?! LVK: Lewis managed that move, but every time he impacts that leg, that knee takes a beating! RP: It sure does! LVK: Lewis grabs White and sets him up for a vertical suplex. He lifts and drops him forward right into the top turnbuckle!!! Lewis climbs up there with him and this is super dangerous! RP: Indeedarooni! A total recipe' for disaster! LVK: Lewis sets him up and lifts off the turnbuckle..INTO A SUPERPLEX!!! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN!!! That seemed to take as much out of Lewis as it did out of White! RP: I think it did! LVK: Lewis manages to roll over and drape and arm over White's shoulder. Will this be it?!?!?! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... RP: NOOOOO!!!!! White escaped again at the last possible second! This is what Pro wrestling is all about! LVK: It sure is Rick! These two have given quite a show tonight! Both men are trying to get to their feet and win this match, but their energy and wills are low now after the beatings they have given each other! RP: This is the best chance White can have to end it because Lewis just used up a reserve tank for that flurry of moves and got nothing for it in return! LVK: Well he nearly won it. He was close! RP: That doesn't mean diddly! LVK: BOTH MEN ARE UP!!! Lewis staggers toward White and drills him with a forearm shiver! He nails another! RP: He is using a closed fist! LVK: He is not! White swings his fist and Lewis ducks and spins him around to go for a SLEEPER HOLD!!! White stagger forward into the ropes and the referee is over quickly! BACK KICK TO THE GROIN BY WHITE!!! The referee never saw it trying to force the break of the sleeper hold! RP: What he doesn't see is hence legal! LVK: if that doesn't explain your morality then I don't know what could! Lewis is back down on the mat and probably feeling like he could sing soprano. White is just smiling as he turns around from the ropes. RP: This one just might be ending soon! LVK: White pulls Lewis up and whips him HARD into the corner! White charges and Lewis meets him with a foot to the face! RP: That was a rookie mistake! He shouldn't be making those types of mistakes! LVK: White gets spun around by that boot to the face and Lewis hops up to the second turnbuckle! He takes his legs and wraps them around White's neck! He is going for something big here! RP: Flying headscissors! But Lewis can't capitalise - both of them are down! [Suddenly the fans break out in a HEEL POP!] LVK: Here come The Leading Men to ringside, no doubt to offer their support for White, their Upstarts teammate. RP: Yay! Reinforcements! [Shade and Valiant reach the ring, and stand watching as White and Lewis lie on the mat. Shade jumps up onto the apron, distracting the referee, giving one of White's secret servicemen the chance to climb into the ring.] LVK: As if Jim Lewis wasn't at enough of a disadvantage after the Stukovski attack, now he has to contend with all of this interference! RP: That guy is just updating White on the latest political news. Michael likes to be up to date at all times. LVK: Oh cut it out Rick! He's giving White a foreign object!! [The serviceman helps White to his feet, and slips a pair of brass knuckles onto his right hand, as Lewis also climbs to his feet across the ring.] LVK: White with the knuckles.....DOWN GOES THE WILDCAT!!! [HUGE HEEL POP!!] RP: What a right hand by Michael White! Who knew he possessed such boxing skills? LVK: Uh, hello? Brass knuckles? [White throws the knuckles from the ring, and Shade drops back to the floor, finishing his argument with the referee. The referee turns back to the action, and sees White covering the Wildcat....] RP: IT'S OVER!! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . thr... LVK: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! SHOULDER UP!!!! WILDCAT GOT HIS SHOULDER UP!!!! [DEAFENING FACE POP!] RP: White's to his feet, and he can't believe Wildcat kicked out! Neither can I for that matter! LVK: What guts, determination and resiliency by the Australian superstar! [Suddenly, a HUGE FACE POP breaks out.] RP: ARRGGGHHHHH!!!! ANGRY RUSKI AT 3 O'CLOCK!!!!! LVK: HERE COMES STUKOVSKI!!!! [Two secret servicemen step into the aisle to try to stop Stukovski, but are plowed over with a hellacious double lariat. FACE POP! Stukovski looks set to climb into the ring and finally get his revenge on White.....] LVK: OH!! SHADE AND VALIANT STOP STUKOVSKI AND THEY'RE GOING AT IT!!! DEAR GOD - STUKOVSKI IS HOLDING HIS OWN AGAINST *BOTH* OF THE LEADING MEN!!! [In the ring, White's face has gone pale and his eyes are wide open in shocked panic. He backs away slowly, his bottom lip trembling in fear.....] RP: LOOKOUT BEHIND YOU!!!! LVK: WILDCAT WITH A ROLL-UP!!!! 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [THUNDEROUS FACE POP!!!!!!] LVK: HE DID IT!!! THE WILDCAT HAS BEATEN MICHAEL WHITE!!!! FINALLY REVENGE IS HIS!!! RP: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! [White rolls out of the roll-up, and immediately slides from the ring, jumping into the crowd with unabated panic, as if not even worrying about the fact that he lost. Right now all that he cares about is getting away before Stukovski can tear him limb from limb.] LVK: Michael White is high-tailing it out of here through the crowd! He wants *nothing* to do with Stukovski right now, and who can blame him? RP: Not me! Stukovski looks like he wants to skin White and make his skin into one of those fuzzy Russian hats! [White scampers through the mass of screaming and cheering fans. Stukovski breaks free of The Leading Men, and lumbers over the area where White has made his escape. He climbs over the railing, and goes after him! HUGE POP!] LVK: LOOK OUT FANS!!! RP: ANGRY FAT RUSSIAN ON THE LOOSE!!! SOMEBODY GET A GUN AND SOME ELEPHANT TRANQUILIZER!!! [Shade and Valiant start making their way up the aisle, looking very pissed off. In the ring, Wildcat gets to his feet, and climbs the turnbuckles, holding both arms up to the fans. POP!] LVK: Wildcat Jim Lewis junior basking in the cheers of the fans, as he has finally accomplished what he has been trying to do for months - he beat Michael White cleanly one-on-one! Not only did he do that, but he overcame incredible odds to do it! [The scene reopens on the very beautiful Lindsey Catalano, who is standing outside an unmarked door. She is looking off-screen with a glazed look in her eyes, obviously thinking of other things. Suddenly she realises that she is on, and turns to the screen and smiles that bimboish smile we've come to know and love.] LC: Uh, hi. Lindsey Catalano here again, and I'm about to get some comments from Chris Hopper about his big match inside the Rage in the Cage with Alex Extreme, Eric Vanguard and.... [Suddenly her faces goes blank. We hear a pissed off voice say "Bryce Jordan" from off-screen.] LC: ....yeah, Bryce Jordan. I hope I can find Chris - I always have such trouble finding his dressing room. He's always asking me to come back to it after the shows, to [slowly, as if remembering it] "feel the Powerload for myself". I don't know why he'd want to hit me with a wrestling move though..... [Another blank look, but again she snaps back into reality, well as close to reality as Lindsey can get.] LC: But anyway, I'm like always talking too much, or at least that's what my therapist tells me. Let's go talk to Chris! [With another flash of her pearly whites - no, not those...her teeth - Lindsey turns and knocks on the unmarked door. There is no answer, so she pushes the door open and steps inside.] LC: Chris? [As the camera pushes into the room, we see a pretty plain and small room. A couch is set against the far wall, and a fridge, chair and monitor sit around it. Nearest to us is a small wooden table, which Lindsey stops next to.] LC: Chris? Are you here? [Still no answer, as the room is obviously empty. Lindsey turns to the camera, her mouth curved downward in an overstated pout of sadness.] LC: I made a boo-boo again didn't I? [She looks ready to cry, and leans back on the table, putting one hand down to rest against. As she does so, her hand touches something, and she turns to look at it. Her look of sadness replaced by one of curiosity, Lindsey picks up a black, material object.] LC: What's this? [She holds it up and moves it about, revealing that it is a black mask of some sort. The camera zooms in, and clearly visible on the mask is yellow writing formed in the word "G-Pro".] LC: G-Pro? I don't know anyone who wears a mask like this. In fact, I don't really know anyone who wears a mask. I mean, I like sometimes wear that horrible leather one with the zipper, when Charlie wants me to, but I hate it. I can hardly breath in it, and when I sweat the leather feels icky, and my hair gets all messy. And *then* Charlie likes to open the zipper and stick.... [Static. After a few seconds we're back with Larry and Rick. Larry has a horrified look on his face, and Rick is clearly trying to contain a burst of laughter.] LVK: Er, I think it's a good thing we cut away from that when we did. Um, but Rick, what do you make of that mask? RP: Well, it's not a gimp mask, if that's what Lindsey was talking about. LVK [teeth clenched]: Rick! RP: But as for who owns it, how am I supposed to know? I never even watch Japanese wrestling. That's your area Van Keel. LVK: So it is. Well, I was an avid fan of G-Pro, the now-defunct Japanese wrestling promotion which was of course owned by RCW part-owner Clint Fletcher. If what we just saw means that one of the former G-Pro wrestlers is here tonight, then that's pretty darn exciting! RP: I guess. But what if it's a really *bad* former G-Pro guy, like Jason Storm. LVK: Yeah right, like Storm would ever wear a mask. He wouldn't be able to look at his pretty-boy face in the mirror then. But anyway fans, it's time for our next match, and it's tagteam warfare, with the National tagteam title on the line! RP: Yeah! Time for the *rightful* champs to get the belts back. LVK: Will you stop with your obvious bias towards The Upstarts? RP: Why? I simply recognise real talent. LVK: Sure Rick, sure. Anyway, the champions are the American Idols, but you can bet that Tripp Shade and Vic Valiant are hungry to get their belts back. But neither team better forget about Team Canada, the hardcore ex-hockey players from up north, because they've won plenty of gold in other leagues, and they could very well do so tonight. RP: Nah. No biased Canadian refs and fans here. They don't stand a chance. They'll be like the Canadian hockeyteam at the Olympics. A *huge* disappointment. LVK: Let's head to the ring! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / National Tagteam Championship three-way dance |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ American Idols (Zach Young and Jacob Owens) (c) TOTAL IMPACT \ vs Team Canada (Bob Jablonski and Trevor Hextall) "CAGED RAGE" \ vs The Leading Men (Tripp Shade and Vic Valiant) \________________________________________________________________ written by: Andy D [All of a sudden two fireworks, one red, the other white, shoot off. "If You Want Blood, You Got It" by AC/DC will play as Team Canada makes their way to the ring. Footage of their many hockey brawls along with that of their previous match with the Leading Men is on the RiverTron.] RA: Introducing first at a total combined weight of five hundred pounds even..... .....BOB JABLONSKI.....TREVOR HEXTALL..... .......TEAM CANAAAAAAADDDAAAAAAA!!! [The fans cheer heartily for the first combatants as the lights dim. Red carpet rolls down the aisle. Weird Chanting. Sirens start. It's "The Leading Men Deluxe Entrance"!] ##MY OFFENSE IS A MIXTURE ## ##OF MIKE AND MUHAMMAD## ##KNOCK A UNCONCIOUS## ##WHO TALK ## [Appearing from behind the curtain is none other than "Vicious" Vic Valiant, and "Box Office" Tripp Shade, collectively.... The Leading Men! Shade presents a mic from his long flowing robe. The music continues, as they make their way down to ringside.] TS: Because >YOU< demanded it....it's The Leading Men! [Boos.] TS: Now usually we come out here, and we do our little spiel... but....not tonight. No, instead...we have put together a special little video package, that I'm sure you'll all enjoy. Fellas in the back....rolllllll the footage. [Scene cuts to Tripp Shade and Vic Valiant] TS: Here we are, Moosejaw, Saskachewan. Home to one-half of Team Canada. I can't really tell you which one, as they're both so completely devoid of any personality, they've just sorta melded together into one, un-interesting comglomerate. V3: I'm in' cold. TS: Yeah, Vic...apparently in [said derisively] this province, they don't have indoor heating, yet. Or plumbing. [A man, a..."Canadian" man walks by. Vic stops him and the two stand beside him.] TS: Hello, Moosejaw, Saskachewan native! Man: Uh...hello. V3: Now you claim to be from Moosejaw, correct? Man: Yes, I guess so. V3: Do you have any witnesses? Man: ... TS: Tell you what, wiseguy, we're going to ask you a couple of questions about your province, and we'll see just how "born here" you REALLY are! [Tripp takes a few notecards out of his coat pocket as the man looks at the camera, confused.] TS: OK...first off, what is the capital of Saskachewan? Man: Well that's easy, it's Regina. [Vic and Tripp look around, seeing no one.] V3: ...Regina? TS: No, we asked what the CAPITAL was. V3: Yeah, as in of Saskachewan. Man: Um...it's Regina. [They both look around again.] TS: Where?! Man: No! The capital city is called "Regina!" TS: Ha ha ha, I'm sorry, that's wrong. V3: The correct answer is "Nova Scotia"...idiot. Man: ... TS: What a dork-off. OK, next question...who's the king of Saskachewan? Man: Um...we don't have a king. V3: WHAT?! Treason! TS: How dare you?! What can you expect from a resident of a place called "Moosejaw?" Get him the hell out of here! Man: Hey, aren't you guys those "Leading Men" losers or whatever? V3: ... Man: I hope Team Canada ends your careers...jerks. TS; Yeah, well, the only thing Team Canada is going to be ending is... V3: Their careers! [The Leading Men laugh and give each other high fives as the man walks away, rolling his eyes.] V3: Let's get the hell out of here before we get caught talking to anymore of these dumbasses. TS: Moosejaw, psh. [Scene fades out, then fades back in to Vic and Tripp again, this time in a slightly different location...a bar.] TS: Hello wrestling fans! Here we are once again, this time in a bar in Medicine Hat, Alberta. V3: That's in Canada. TS: Yes it is. [The two walk to the bar and sit down. The bartender steps over to them.] Bartender: What can I get for you two? TS: Well, ya hoser, how about getting us some beers? Oh, and make sure they're imports, as opposed to that local crap. [The entire bar gets quiet and turns to face them.] Bartender: What did you say? V3: Look pal, I've been all over the world, and everywhere I go, the beer is better than it is here. Get us some of that English beer. [Everyone stares at them in stunned silence.] TS: We'd just like to take this time to tell you that your province sucks and Team Canada is going to lose...thank you. [Vic and Tripp get up and walk towards the door. Vic passes a man talking on a pay phone. Vic very quietly walks up, taps the man on the shoulder, then presses down on the hook, abruptly ending the call. Vic then turns and he and Tripp walk out the doror. The rest of the bar silently looks on behind them.] [Cuts back to the ringside area. TLM chuckle heartily.] TS: That's good stuff..... Now, Idols..don't feel left out... we were plannin' on doing a piece on your home town..but we figured, hey, we're in St. Louis...and when you see one ass-backwards American town...you've seen 'em all. [Tripp hands the mic to V3.] V3: You've got a team representing Canada. A Team Representing America. And then you have us. The Upstart Nation contigent. [Vic hands the mic back to Tripp.] TS: You four nancies can run..but >WE< can act! [The camera cuts back to the entranceway.] RA: And their opponents, weighing in tonight at four hundred and forty pounds...the RCW National Taaaag Team Champions of the Woo--er, Nation.. [Crowd laughs at the ring announcer's over enthusiasm.] RA: THE AMERICAN IDOLS!!! [The intro of "Born in the USA" by Bruce Springsteen begins to blare over the loudspeakers as red, white and blue lights streak across the entrance way. The crowd begins to boo as "All American" Jacob Owens and "Top Notch" Zach Young make their way out to the top of the ramp. Zach and Jacob look around at the fans, shaking their heads with condescending smirks. They make their way to the ring, Zach yelling at a couple fans along the way. They roll under the bottom ropes almost simultaneously as the crowd continues to let them have it with a torrent of boos. They both get onto the turnbuckles and stick their fists in the air as the music fades....] [DING DING DING!!] [The crowd pops big in anticipation of a huge brawl breaking out, but instead quiet down quickly as all three teams...stand still?] LVK: All three teams staring at each other, staying in their respective corners to the surprise of...well just about everyone. RP: This is for the Tag Team Titles Van Keel, these guys aren't about to ju- [HUGE crowd pop!] LVK: All three teams just darted out of their corners and we've got a brawl on our hands! RP: I didn't get to finish my sentence! LVK: Too bad Rick, we got Valiant and Owens fighting in one corner, Shade and Jablonski in another and Hextall and Young duking it out in the middle. RP: Team Canada are the mindless brawlers here, you know this is in their favor. [Vic Valiant has taken control of Jacob Owens in the corner, rocking him with lefts and right to the body as his overmatched partner Tripp takes a beating from Jablonski in the opposite corner. In the center of the ring, Bob Hextall mercilessly pounds on Zach Young, finally launching him out of the ring with a clothesline.] LVK: Young lands outside and Hextall follows him out. Valiant is stomping the life out of Owens in one corner and Jablonski is _still_ flailing away on Shade. RP: Ohh! Spoke to soon Van Keel, Tripp just gave Jablonski a thumb to the eye for his troubles and Vic kicked Owens outside. LVK: The Leading Men are looking to extract a little double team goodness at the expense of Bob Jablonski. RP: By the way, who's the ref in this match? LVK:Uhhhh.... [While Larry ponders, Tripp Shade whips Jablonski at Valiant who stops Bob dead in his tracks with a lariat. They pick him back up and Vic boots Jablonski to the gut, allowing Shade the time to nail Jablonski with a DDT.] LVK: ...Herman Gehl! Outside Owens and Jacobs have teamed up to punish Hextall! Back first into the guardrail goes Trevor and again...and again...and again! He staggers out...double hiptoss from the champs!! Inside Valiant just hit a belly to belly suplex, good Lord! RP: Not a good night to be a hockey player apparently. Hey! Look at this, Gehl's actually doing his job! He just told the Idols to get back on the ring apron. Wow. LVK: So it's The Leading Men against Bob Jablonski to start out and Bob's had a tough night already. [Oddly enough Jablonski strikes first, or attempts to, swinging a wild left hand that Shade ducks under and goes behind Jablonski to deliver a side Russian Legsweep. Tripp stands up and lays in a swift boot to the downed ex-hockey player before strutting over to the American Idols corner.] LVK: Valiant off the ropes...legdrop right across the throat. The cover..... ONE........... TWO.......... KICKOUT.... [Valiant rolls and yells for Shade, who was yapping at the American Idols. Vic picks up Jablonski by the legs in a reverse powerbomb attempt and Tripp cradles Bob's head on the way down, hitting an Ace Crusher. This time Shade covers...] LVK: ONE................ TWO........................ Hextall breaks it up! And now Herman Gehl is warning him to get back in his corner! RP: And while Gehl was worrying about that goon, Jacob Owens just tagged himself in the match!! LVK: He hooks Shade....German suplex! Over to Jablonski, Owens stradles the arm and..... RP: La Majistral! ONE........... TWO........... KICKOUT..... LVK: And Shade just sucker-punched Owens! [Shade kicks Owens in the gut, and then lifts him into a vertical suplex. But Owens shifts his weight and falls to his feet behind Shade, while still holding onto Tripp's head. The end result is Owens holding Shade in an inverted DDT setup. But instead of dropping to the mat, he links his hands under Shade, and pulls back.....] LVK: DRAGON SLEEPER BY OWENS!! RP: TRIPP TAPPED OUT!!! HE SUBMITTED TO A DRAGON SLEEPER!!! LVK: No he didn't. That's just plain dumb Rick. RP: Yeah, I guess it is. Almost as dumb as an untalented tagteam who used to wrestle here trying to do comedy. Sad. [Shade gives Owens a swift elbow to the gut and Owens releases the devestating maneuver. With Owens still doubled over, Tripp hits a quick swinging neckbreaker and then turns in a dead sprint for Team Canada's corner. He stops about two feet away and...] Crowd: OHHHH!!! RP: Ha! He slapped Hextall! I love it! LVK: Hextall didn't!! He just obliterated Tripp with a clothesline and races over to Owens and headbutts Zach. Owens backs up into a corner...and here comes Jablonski!!! [It's open season on Jacob Owens for Team Canada. Punches, kicks, knees, elbows are being thrown at Owens in rapid succession as the crowd roars it's approval. Hextall whips Owens to the opposite corner and Jablonski follows him with a bone rattling clothesline, and then goes back to punishing Owens with some Canadian hockey goon goodness!! But, someone has seen enough apparently. Vic Valiant races in and plasters Jablonski with a right hand and then the same for Owens. Hextall runs over to save his partner, but is cut off by Zach Young and a lariat.] LVK: Here comes Zach Young and we got all three teams brawling!!! Again!!! And Shade...Tripp Shade is ascending the top rope... RP: What the hell is he doing? He should be in there helping out his partner!?!?! [Indeed he should Rick, but instead he's on the top rope watching Vic Valiant prepare to give a Valiant Bomb to Bob Hextall. Sadly he never gets the chance because Bob Jablonski whips Jacob Owens hard to the buckle, and Owens goes crashing in. The same buckle that Tripp Shade _WAS_ standing on. Now, Tripp is...] ___THUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDDD___ RP: HOLY GUACAMOLE!!! [...falling. To the arena floor to be precise, and the landing wasn't very good. Bob Jablonski spots his handi-work and slides out, and rummages underneath the ring.] LVK: Good God on Friday!!!!! Tripp Shade just took at least a ten foot fall to the floor and he ain't movin'! But Jablonski is and he just pulled out a... [HUGE crowd pop as Jablonski holds up one of the Field of Extremes bags from earlier in the night.] LVK: He's got one of them bags and Hextall just threw Tripp back in the ring, as the American Idols just pushed Vic out!! And now Jablonski just dumped that bag out. Let's see...a stick, a goalie's mask and...a puck. RP: A lotta damage a puck is gonna do. LVK: Hextall just picked up that stick, Jablonski the goalies mask and... __WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACKKKK__ LVK: ...HE JUST WAFFLED SHADE WITH THAT MASK!!! The crowd is loving it!! RP: But Herman Gehl isn't. While Hextall wears out Shade with that stick, Gehl is telling Jablonski one more time and they're out. LVK: Herman shoves them away as Tripp gets to his feet. He warns Team Canada one more time to put down the weapons, or they're history. [As Tripp Shade gets to his feet, Trevor Hextall looks at Shade. Then to Herman Gehl. Then back to Shade, and then... __CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCK__ Crowd: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! ...pastes Tripp with the autographed Wayne Gretzky hockey stick, breaking it in two clean pieces over Shade's head as Tripp collapses to the now blood stained mat.] LVK: Jesus H. Crimony! Hextall just splintered his stick over Tripp's empty head and Team Canada is back on the attack. But...but..Herman Gehl is calling for the bell as he leans over the ropes. RA: Ladies and Gentlemen, referee Herman Gehl has DISQUALIFIED TEAM CANADA! [The crowd does _not_ like this, and shows as much with thunderous boos. Team Canada takes their parting shots at Tripp before being escorted down the aisle by RCW Security. The American Idols have finished their masterpiece beatdown of Vic Valiant on the outside and slide in, not knowing what's next. Herman Gehl leans over the ropes again and...] RA: This match will continue as a regular tag team match, with the first fall winning. [Pop!] LVK: We're down to two on two, folks. The current champs against the former champs. Mano a mano, one on one, face to face, nose to no- RP: Shutup and call it Van Keel! LVK: Righto. It appears Zach Young and Tripp Shade will re-start the match. Back to a vertical base, and they lockup. Young into a side headlock, but Shade picks him up...belly to back suplex! Right back up, and Young grabs that headlock again. Shade with an elbow to the gut and he whips him to the ropes. [Young bounds off the ropes, and over Shade who dropped to the ground. Zach ricochets off the opposite rope and leaps at Tripp, who has now stood up. Tripp catches him though, and plants Young with a spinebuster. Tripp bounces back up and grabs the legs of Young, and turns him over into a half crab.] RP: Shade wrenches back on the legs and Young screams in pain. LVK: Herman Gehl asks Young if he gives up, and Owens enters the ring. [FACE POP for Owens as he takes a step back and..] LVK: OHH!! Dropkick to the face of Tripp Shade and the crowd seems to be warming up to the American Idols. Tripp lets go of the crab and tags in Valiant. [Vic comes in and puts Young in a front chancery, draping Zach's near arm over his own shoulder. Vic lifts aaaaaannnddd....holds Zach in the air for a second, or two, to think about it. Suddenly, he drops to the ground, delivering a crushing brainbuster.] LVK: ONE.......................... TWO.......................... THR-KICKOUT!............ LVK: Valiant's got Young in a standing headscissors, perhaps going for that spinning tiger bomb. RP: Call it right, it's the V Bomb '00 and if he hits it, the match is done. LVK: Valiant lifts..but no go, Young still has some life. Again he tries... [Valiant lifts Young alright, but Zach takes a shot at Vic in mid-air, knocking him off balance. Zach takes advantage and reverses into a hurricanrana and then rains lefts and rights down upon the head of Valiant before standing up and tagging in Jacob Owens.] LVK: Whip to the ropes...HIGH back body drop! Gehl tells Young to get out of the ring and Owens with a lowblow on Valiant. Standing headscissors...piledriver!! ONE................. TWO................ KICKOUT.......... RP: And Young _STILL_ won't get out of the ring! Tripp runs at Owens...powerslam!! He hurls Shade back to his corner and the crowd is on it's feet! [Young finally goes back to his corner as Owens begins to work on the leg of V3. He stomps on the knee of Vic and drops an elbow on it, before locking in a figure four leglock, or rather...attempting. As Jacob bends down to grab his free leg, Vic springs up and cradles Owens.] LVK: ONE............................... TWO............................... LVK: Owens reverses.... ONE............................... TWO............................... KICKOUT......................... LVK: Both men up, Owens whips Valiant...Vic ducks the clothesline. He picks Owens up....CRITICAL IMPACT!!! RP: Owens is dead! ONE.............................. TWO................................ THREE..............................???? LVK: NO!!! Young breaks it up. Valiant takes the second and tags out to Shade... RP: Shade charges in...hiptoss from Owens! He picks Tripp up, boot to stomach.....'OL FAITHFUL!!!!!!!! ONE.................................... TWO.................................. THR-save by Valiant!!!! [Vic saves the day for Tripp who got buried by Owens. Owens stands up, with Shade at his feet. Slowly....veeeeeeeeerryy slowly he pulls Tripp up who suddenly hits a drop toe hold on Jacob!] RP: He was playing possum, brilliant! He turns Owens over... LVK: CRITICAL ACCLAIM!!! That modified Texas cloverleaf and Owens has nowhere to go. RP: INDEEDAROONI!! I've been dying to say that all match! LVK: Owens is trying vain to reach that bottom rope, but he's got a LOOOOOONG way to go. [Shade pulls back on his finisher as hard as he can, doing his damndest to break Owens in two. And Jacob screams....and screams...and hollers some more. But he ain't tappin' out. In fact, slowly but surely he's dragging himself and Tripp to that bottom rope, dragging himself to the only salvation he has. And amazingly enough, the crowd is behind him _all_ the way.] LVK: He's crawling, inch by inch and the crowd is egging him on!! Whoda thunk that the American Idols of all people would have the crowd support. RP: Van Keel you fool, they don't like the Idols they just _HATE_ The Leading Men. [As Owens slowly makes his way to the rope, Tripp Shade is fighting with all he has before...letting go?] LVK: He let him go..what is he thinking?? RP: He's gonna wear him down a bit more Van Keel, he's gonna break that back. [Tripp picks Owens up by his hair and _slaps_ him in the face to resounding boos. Owens is basically out on his feet and Tripp takes his sweet time winding up to clock Owens with a right hand. Too much time in fact, because Owens ducks under it and makes the tag to Zach Young.] LVK: Owens makes the tag and Young races in, splattering Tripp with a lariat! Valiant's in and is met with a dropkick that sends him back out!! Shade back up...he misses the clothesline...Young catches him and hooks him for... RP: PATRIOT MISSILE!!! LVK: He's _got_ him...... ONE....................................................... TWO...................................................... THREE!!!!................................................ LVK: NO!! Valiant to the rescue! And he just knocked Owens over the ropes. Shade grabs Young and pastes him with a reverse DDT. He gives a hand signal to Vic who pulls Young up. [As Young stands up...maybe for the last time, Tripp bounds off the ropes behind Zach and picks up a head of steam. He dives at Young's legs as Vic obliterates him with a lariat, bringing the Double Goozle back to life!! Shade goes to the top rope as the crowd begins to buzz. They know what's next.] RP: Here it comes...the Double Feature!!! TLM's gonna get back the belts they never lost!!!! [As Vic prepares for the Valiant Suplex, Jacob Owens climbs into the ring and clocks Tripp Shade with a right hand, causing Tripp to lose his balance and for the second time tonight...] __CRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSHHHHHH__ [...fall to the arena floor. Valiant spots this and drops Zach Young to run full steam at Owens..right into a powerslam! Young climbs the turnbuckles as Jacob pulls Vic into a vertical headscissors...] LVK: Owens lifts....... RP: Young springs off the top rope.. LVK .... RP: RAISING THE STANDARD!!! ONE..................................... TWO...................................... THREEEEEEEEE..................!!!!! [DING DING DING] RA: THE WINNERS and STIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL RCW National Tag Team Champions....The American Idols!!! [Young and Owens embrace as they are handed their title belts, and the fans politely applaud. But in their celebrations, the American Idols don't see Shade sliding back into the ring with a chair....] LVK: Uh-Oh! LOOKOUT!!!! [HEEL POP as Shade sneaks in behind the two Idols, and cocks the chair back....] *CLAAAANG!!!!* RP: YEAH! Give it to 'em Tripp!! LVK: DOWN GOES YOUNG COURTESY OF THE TRIPP SHADE CHAIRSHOT..... [As Valiant climbs back to his feet to join his teammate, the fans erupt into a HUGE FACE POP!] LVK: JABLONSKI...HEXTALL....TEAM CANADA ARE ON THEIR WAY BACK TO THE RING!!! RP: AND THEY'VE STILL GOT THAT HOCKEY EQUIPMENT!! ARGGGHHHHH!!!!! [Hextall and Jablonski slide into the ring, and Shade, who was about to hit Owens with the chair, turns his attention towards the Canadian brawlers. Hextall and Valiant collide and brawl from the ring, as Jablonski swings with the broken hockey stick....] *FWAP!!!* LVK: OOOHHH!!! JABLONSKI COLD-COCKED SHADE WITH THE BROKEN HOCKEY STICK AND SHADE IS DOWN!!!! RP: And now Jablonski and Owens are going at it!! THIS WAR IS FAR FROM OVER!!!! LVK: It sure is!!! Here comes security.... [Cut to commercials.] [The screen reopens on a high shot of the screaming fans packed into the Savvis Center, and then goes back to Larry and Rick.] LVK: Welcome back fans. Well, it's time to hold tight to your seats, because coming up next we have the culmination of one of the most intense feuds River City Wrestling has seen to date, as Raya Oscura takes on Erik Jorgensen in defense of the Light Heavyweight title! RP: Frankly, Van Keel, I think the belt is just chump change to these guys. They want to maim, cripple, excavate, ventilate, and tweak one another. They want to reduce their opponent to a pile of jelly, bone chips, and agony. And that’s just the kind of thing I like to see! LVK: That was touching, Rick. Have you considered work as a writer for the new Hannibal Lecter movie? RP: I tried out for “Hannibal”, but they told me that I would scare people too much. LVK: Lord knows I can vouch for that. Let’s get down to our ring announcer as he brings out Erik “Raganarok” Jorgensen for this high-flying competition between two bitter enemies! __ __ _ ________________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Light-Heavyweight Championship match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ \ Raya Oscura (c) (w/ Mary) TOTAL IMPACT \ vs "CAGED RAGE" \ Erik "Ragnarok" Jorgensen \________________________________________________________________ written by: Ryan P [The crowd in the Savvis Center hits a fever pitch of building excitement as the ring announcer steps suavely between the ropes and dramatically brings the microphone to his lips:] RA: Laaaaadies and geeeennntlemeeeen .... this contest is for the RCW *LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHT* CHAAAAMPIONSHIP *BELT*! [The crowd pops. They’re suckers for good enunciation] RA: Iiiiiiintroducing first ..... standing at FIVE feet, NINE inches aaand weighing *in* at TWO-hundred and TWENTY-SEVEN pouuuunds .... [The lights in the arena goes entirely dark...the crowd pops with excitement and begin giving out some preliminary catcalls until the RiverTron lights up, featuring long sweeping panoramic shots of a battlefield littered with bodies and men in strange armor wielding axes, swords and hammers .... a loud and strong voice, reminiscent of the late Orson Wells, speaks calmly...] "There will be a time where men, Gods and monsters will fight the ultimate battle. At the end, nothing will be left in the whole Universe. Gods, monsters and men will die together in the end. This battle is called... RAGNAROK!" [There is a burst of drums and trumpets as the RiverTron displays the word “RAGNAROK” in huge red letters on both screens, and swirling golden spotlights focus on a man is standing next to backstage entrance. He raises his arms... And Manowar's "The Power" blasts with fury as sparkling white pyros hit on either side of him, as he makes his way to the ring, ignoring the crowd who is releasing a BIG heelish pop. He is a nice looking shoulder-length blond man with blue eyes.. Sporting a red singlet with a blue/white cross in front and a silver winged helmet on head. He also carries a small grey sledgehammer with the inscription "MJOLNIR" on it in his right hand.] RA: EEEEEEEEEERIIIIIIIIIIIIK “RAAAAAAAAGNAAAAAAROOOOOOK” JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORGEEEENSEEEEEEEN! [The heel pop increases as Erik raises his sledgehammer high... And slams it against a turnbuckle, shaking the ropes in the ring for some instants. He then points the hammer to backstage entrance, waiting his opponent.] LVK: This is one dangerous man, ladies and gentlemen. We have seen Erik Jorgensen take Raya Oscura to his upper limits and several times appear to get the better of the masked man! He is focused, intense, and very, very lethal. RP: Especially if he gets his mitts around that hammer. Jorgensen may be one god short of a pantheon, but the man knows his weapons ... and I think he knows a thing or two about Oscura that might end up shifting the balance here tonight! LVK: You’re referring, of course, to the involvement of the lovely and mysterious young lady known as Mary? RP: No, Van Keel. I’m referring to the involvement of Luscious Jasmine and a set of fur handcuffs. YES, I mean Mary! [Before Larry can continue, the fans pop again as the ring announcer once more dramatically lifts the microphone to his lips, this time pointing with one finger directly at the entranceway.] RA: Aaaaaaand now, ladies and gentlemen, the Savvis Center will be host to ... the RCW *LIGHT* HEAVYWEIGHT *CHAMPION*! [The crowd pops. They love champions.] RA: So let us welcome the King of Shadows, standing at .... [Suddenly, without even a remote semblance of a warning, the entire arena descends into an abrupt blackness. As some spectators scream in excited anticipation and others feverishly spark their cigarette lighters into action, the dark void partially lifts, when a misty golden hue merges into the atmosphere. The RiverTron, barely glimmering, displays curling tendrils of golden fog which part to reveal the words “Raya” in black letters on silver on one screen and “Oscura” in silver letters on black on the other screen. Unbidden, the venomous Rap/Metal strains of Puya's "Sal Pa Fuera" then spits from the state-of-the-art PA system, which in turn heralds the arrival of a slim, athletic entity from behind the folds of the connecting curtain.] [The fighter is clad from "top to toe" in a watermarked tapestry of black, which is partially covered by the flowing folds of a long dark trenchcoat. Crowning his bodysuit there does reside a horned wraparound mask that is utterly bereft of eye and mouth holes. It is a facial covering that betrays only the deepest sense of vehement foreboding ... and it is with this very aura emanating from his being that the RCW Light Heavyweight Champion known as RAYA OSCURA reaches the ring and slides expertly under the bottom rope.] RA: The reigning RCW Light-Heavyweight champion...... .........RAYA OSCUUUUUURRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! [Without hesitation, the self-anointed "Death Angel" rips the cherished Title belt from around his waist and stalks his way to the very centre of the canvas. After fixing Jorgensen with a glare that could effectively burn straight through solid lead, Raya raises the impressive accolade to the skies....] LVK: Raya Oscura, folks! Easily one of the most impressive and popular wrestlers that RCW has to offer! RP: And mysterious. LVK: And mysterious, yes! RP: And skillful. LVK: Certainly one of the most skilled! RP: And girly. LVK: And girl ... HEY! Dangit, Rick! Don’t do that! [In the ring, Oscura hands his belt over to referee Gus Moxley, who holds it high in the air to one final pop as Oscura simply continues to glare at Jorgensen, who gazes hatefully back.] LVK: You can FEEL the hatred between these two men! It is PALPABLE! RP: Boy ... with all this hatred, I just don’t know who to root for! Which of them is stronger with the Dark Side? Normally I’d flat-out say Jorgensen, but Oscura DOES wear a lot of black ... LVK: ... you’re a sick man, Rick. RP: Give in the to the Dark Side, Van Keel! Feel your hatred grow! [In the ring, Jorgensen finally approaches Oscura. Oscura in turn walks towards Jorgensen, and the crowd pops as the two men meet in the center of the ring, and without a second’s further consideration LAY into each other with massive, swinging punches!] LVK: Whoa, NELLY! These two are NOT letting any time go to waste as they have OPENED up the taps! RP: Heck with the taps! They’re opening big cans of whoop-tushie! LVK: “Whoop-tushie”? RP: We’re family-oriented .... with an EDGE! [Back in the ring, Jorgensen’s slight edge in mass and his greater upper-body strength serves him well as he unloads with a series of right hands that send the masked Mexican lurching back into the turnbuckles. Jorgensen catches him with another closed fist .... this one finally drawing a gentle admonition from Moxley ... before rearing back and BLASTING into Raya’s chest with a knife-edge chop that actually causes the masked man to REAR into the air before dropping back down, when he’s hit with ANOTHER stinging chop that echoes across the Savvis Center.] Crowd: WOOO! WOOO! LVK: Jorgensen seizing the early advantage here! Oscura has a few inches on “Ragnarok”, but that Norwegian madman is built like a fireplug! He’s just BLASTING into the champ with those chops! RP: The champ’s a chump. Those chops are championship chops that wouldn’t be chopped by a chump like the champ. LVK: .... [Raya slumps back in the corner as Jorgensen backs off a few paces ... before THUNDERING back into the corner with a lariat the rocks Raya so hard that he staggers dizzily out of the corner, trying to clear his head! Ragnarok follows him from behind and takes him by the head, turning and ... DROPPING him with a REVERSE NECKBREAKER! Oscura is down on the mat as Jorgensen comes back to his feet and begins stomping at the masked man’s head!] LVK: MY GOSH! Erik Jorgensen is REALLY laying into Oscura! The champion lost the initiative in the early going and he’s been on the defensive ever since! RP: I’d hardly call it “defense” to lie on the mat and get your skull kicked in, Van Keel. LVK: No? What about that, then? [In the ring, Osura reaches out one hand with blinding speed and seizes Jorgensen’s foot in mid-stomp, kipping up and WHIRLING around, wrenching Erik over with a DRAGON SCREW LEGWHIP! The crowd pops at their hero’s sudden recovery! Jorgensen winces at the pain in his knee but comes quickly back to his feet to meet Oscura!] LVK: And a swift counter by Raya Oscura puts him right back in the game! RP: This is no game, Van Keel. [Indeed, the two men in the ring take it VERY seriously, launching another flurry of assault upon each other! Jorgensen catches Oscura with a hard right cross, and Osura replies with a snap kick to the chest! Jorgensen staggers and replies with a brutal European uppercut, and Oscura nearly falls before recovering his balance and countering with a spinning kick! Oscura follows this with a knife-edge chop ... but Jorgensen catches his arm and spins him into a hammerlock! Oscura reaches back over his shoulder, seeking an escape, but then runs forward and springs off the middle rope, flipping OVER Jorgensen and coming down behind him, now holding JORGENSEN in a hammerlock! Ragnarok snarls and loops his other arm behind Raya’s head, dropping and catching the masked man with a jawbuster that separates the two, leaving Jorgensen clutching his shoulder and Oscura rubbing his jaw! The crowd pops at the exchange!] RP: Geez. LVK: These two men are displaying some TEXTBOOK wrestling in there! RP: Remind me not to take THAT class. [Oscura now coming at Jorgensen again! Erik lunges to meet him, but is surprised as the nimble Mexican slides between his legs! Oscura comes up behind Erik and locks in a waistlock, attempting to take him over in a German suplex! Jorgensen counters, spinning behind Oscura and catching HIM in a waistlock! He gets Oscura up, but the King of Shadows backflips out of the suplex to land on his feet behind a staggering Jorgensen! He immediately catches the Norwegian with a dropkick to the back of the head that sends Erik into the ropes, where he leans back, clutching his head as he glares at Oscura!] LVK: INCREDIBLE! It is nearly IMPOSSIBLE for either of these two men to seize an advantage, but Oscura seems to have a slight edge now! RP: All is fleeting, Van Keel. [Prophecy, perhaps, as Oscura charges at Jorgensen ... only to be BACKDROPPED over the top rope! The crowd gasps, but then pops as the masked man lands on his feet on the outside! Oscura immediately grabs Erik’s feet and pulls him to the outside! There is no danger of being counted out, as Moxley seems to be far too engrossed in the match to risk ending it early ..] LVK: Boy oh boy, these guys are REALLY going for it! RP: The longer they go without getting wasted, the greater the wasting shall be! [On the outside now, Raya shoves Jorgensen into the apron and launches a thrust kick at his jaw ... which is CAUGHT by Erik, who snaps Raya over into an Achilles heel lock! Raya reaches for the ropes only to realize he is outside the ring, and instead grabs the steel railing, using the leverage to YANK himself out of the painful hold! He rolls away from an elbowdrop attempt by Erik, and grabs the pained Norwegian off the floor, scooping him up onto his shoulder and attempting to run him into the steel turnpost! Jorgensen pushes backwards off Oscura’s shoulder and attempts to shove HIM facefirst into the steel! Oscura, however, runs UP the turnpost and comes down behind Jorgensen, catching him in a waistlock and shoving HIM towards the post ... only to be NAILED by a backwards kick to the groin! The masked man winces and doubles over, and Jorgensen grabs him by the arm and WHIPS him towards the steel ... Oscura puts on the brakes at the last seconds and ducks around, whipping back with a hook kick that C ATCHES Jorgensen in the back of the head and RAMS his forehead into the steel pole!] *KABONG!* [The crowd pops for this mad exchange and the success of their hero, and Oscura rolls the dazed Jorgensen back into the ring!] RP: WHAT ARE THESE GUYS TRYING TO PROVE? LVK: Neither athlete is giving the other an INCH, Rick! Not a CENTIMETER! These men are not just vying for the gold ... they’re trying to prove who the BETTER MAN IS! RP: The guy with the bigger hammer, I’d say. LVK: Jorgensen’s hammer isn’t THAT big. RP: At least he has one. [Back in the ring, Jorgensen has staggered back to his feet and launches a further assault, nailing the returning Oscura with a snap jab ... and another! The third punch is CAUGHT, however, and Oscura counters with a VICIOUS palm thrust that snaps the Norwegian’s head back on its moorings! He catches Jorgensen with a knee to the midsection and hooks his head, lifting him and IMPALING his head into the mat with a DEVASTATING IMPLANT DDT!] LVK: OH, MERCY! RP: Okay .... NOW someone has an advantage! Happy, Van Keel? LVK: Not just an advantage ... he nearly pulped Jorgensen’s head with that beauty! And now the crowd’s getting hot as the masked man ascends the turnbuckles! [Oscura indeed is drawing a big pop as he leaps to his feet and pumps his fist over the prone Jorgensen, before running for the buckles and springing up top, setting up some sort of moonsault .... only to be distracted as a loud murmur hits the crowd who see a young lady emerging from the entranceway ... the confusion increases as she appears on the RiverTron ... Oscura looks particularly shocked to see ...] LVK: MARY! RP: What is THAT broad doing out here? [Mary is dressed conservatively ... some would say badly ... in a baggy black T-shirt, jeans, and old running shoes. She is gazing wide-eyed at Oscura .... and Jorgensen ... as she walks slowly and cautiously down to ringside, looking alarmed. She stops at ringside in a neutral corner while Oscura points at her and shouts something, gesturing to the back. Before Mary can reply ...] LVK: OH NO! RP: Dames. Nothin’ but trouble, the lot of ‘em. [In the ring, Jorgensen has slowly recovered and barely mounted the second buckle behind the crouching Oscura .. he suddenly seizes him in a waistlock, and before the champ can react, he HURLS him over and back in a release German suplex! Oscura lands HARD on his neck and head in the center of the ring, and Jorgensen lands none-too-easily nearby!] LVK & RP: WOW! LVK: GOOD GRIEF, FOLKS! Jorgensen nearly KILLED Oscura with that top-rope suplex! He could’ve BROKEN his NECK! RP: I think I see pieces of it sticking out of his mask! LVK: And Mary looks ... well, shocked .... but not as horrified as you would think! RP: Yeah ... in fact, she’s making eyes at Jorgensen! LVK: She might just be shocked, Rick. RP: THE BROAD’S BATTING HER GOO-GOO EYES AT THE NORWEGIAN FRUITCAKE! [Mary, looking to be in dire straits, slaps the mat .. though its hard to tell who she’s encouraging as Raya lies unmoving and Jorgensen slowly drags himself, growling, over to the still form of the Mexican, where he applies a loose lateral press and hooks the leg limply! Moxley drops to the mat ....] ONE!! TWO!!! NOT QUITE!!! [Oscura just barely kicks out and the crowd POPS! as Jorgensen smacks the mat in irritation!] LVK: WOW! I was SURE he had him there, but there’s just too much fight in the champion! RP: Hey, it’s no walk in the park for Jorgensen, y’know. [Jorgensen peels Oscura off the mat and whips him to the ropes, catching him on the rebound with a BIG lifting Samoan drop! Oscura is plastered into the mat once more, and Jorgensen hits the strands fast, coming back and down hard with a LEGDROP! He doesn’t bother with the cover, however, and instead pulls Raya up and whips him hard into the corner! He runs after him, but is NAILED by a back elbow as Oscura, in a shocking crowd-popping display of agility, runs UP the pads and flies backwards with the big elbow to the jaw! Both men are down once more as the crowd pops and Mary cries out and slaps the mat.] LVK: A BRILLIANT counter by Oscura after a flurry of offense from Jorgensen ... RP: JUST WHO IS THAT BROAD WITH? LVK: It’s hard to tell, Rick ... but TIME will tell. [Jorgensen, amazingly, is the first back to his feet .. and he whips catches a rising Oscura with a big boot that knocks him into the corner. Jorgensen charges in and catches him in the midsection with a shoulderblock that doubles him over ... Jorgensen immediately follows this up with a snap DDT that drills the Mexican into the canvas. Raganarok looks to continue the assault ... but then he glances outside and catches Mary’s eye. She appears nervous ... but she cannot stop staring at him. Vain as he is, Jorgensen decides to show off a bit, scooping Oscura up with a one-armed lift and holding him high for a few moments before slamming him hard into the mat. Jorgensen roars at the crowd, who respond with a hail of boos. Erik pauses to flex his impressive upper physique, grinning wolfishly at the shocked Mary at ringside, before sliding under the bottom rope to ringside.] LVK: Good GRIEF! Jorgensen back up like a shot and he’s ALL OVER Oscura! And if I’m not mistaken, it appears that the blonde man is ... SHOWING OFF for Mary! RP: And I reiterate ... WHAT is she DOING out here, aside from almost getting Oscura killed? LVK: I’m not sure, Rick .... but I’ll wager that Jorgensen is looking to find out! [Jorgensen, on the outside, reaches to a stack of chairs in the corner and carefully selects a gleaming steel specimen! The crowd roars in disapproval as Jorgensen prepares to slide back into the ring to flatten Oscura like a bug ... only to have Mary grab his arm and stop him from going back in! He turns to glare at her ... and then pauses, grinning as she ... softly smiles at him!] LVK: THAT JEZEBEL! RP: WHAT THE DEVIL IS HER GAME? Maaaan, Erik was going to crack Raya’s mask open! I wanted to see what the prize inside was! LVK: WHOA, NELLY! WATCH OUT, RAGNAROK! [... because RAYA OSCURA has returned to his feet, and looks INFLAMED at seeing Mary clinging to Jorgensen! Oscura comes off the far ropes and BOLTS at Ragnarok, DIVING between the ropes with a DEVASTATING SPEAR ..] RP: OH $#!^! MAD NORWEGIAN THOR-WANNABE WITH A CHAIR!!! *CLANGKRUNCH!* LVK: DEAR GOD! RP: HOLY CRANIAL RUPTURE! [Indeed, such is the case as Erik Jorgensen steps nimbly aside from Raya’s spear and SWINGS the steel chair he is holding, catching Raya RIGHT in the SKULL in mid-air! The Mexican falls in a broken heap against the steel railing, a dark reddish patch spreading beneath his mask and trailing out across the concrete!] LVK: MY GOD, fans! Erik Jorgensen may have KILLED Raya Oscura with that stunt! He PLASTERED that unforgiving steel RIGHT ACROSS HIS SKULL! He is ... RP: BUSTED WIDE OPEN! THE CRIMSON MASK! THE JUICE IS FLOWING! THE RED, RED CROOVY! HEMOPHILES OF THE WORLD REJOICE! LVK: That’ll do, Rick. [Oscura is absolutely limp, and Mary looks shocked as Jorgensen howls with laughter and slams the chair down twice across Raya’s back, causing the masked man to spasm in agony. Jorgensen unfolds the chair and sets it up, and then grabs Oscura’s head and loops his arm across his shoulder ... he points at Mary and laughs, and the young lady gasps and retreats. Gus Moxley shouts admonitions as Jorgensen lifts Oscura high ...] LVK: NO! DON’T YOU DARE! RP: MOTHER MARY MCCREE! HE’LL ... *CLANG!* RP: .... KILL HIM! $#!^!! [With a HORRIFYING crunching sound, Jorgensen DROPS Oscura’s skull and spine directly downwards into the unfolded steel chair with a BRAINBUSTER that causes the masked man’s limp body to jerk and twitch on the cold cement floor.] LVK: Oh, LORD! Erik Jorgensen has SNAPPED here, ladies and gentlemen, and Raya Oscura is paying the consequences as this match rapidly descends into madness! RP: Spinal fragments on the floor, blood in the air, twisted steel and sex appeal, Van Keel! LET THE GAMES BEGIN! [Jorgensen laughs maniacally, laying boots into Oscura, before Gus Moxley, in a rare display of refereeing, slides outside and forces the Norwegian back into the ring while Moxley administers a 10-count to the fallen Oscura.] RP: Oh, geez ... you KNOW things have gotten serious when Moxley is counting someone out. That Mexican could be really hurting. LVK: Indeed he is, Rick ... and Moxley is LITERALLY preventing Jorgensen from going outside of the ring BODILY while continuing the count! Jorgensen doesn’t want the match to end this way, as he can’t win the title on countout! [As the count approaches 5, we see Oscura start to barely twitch, his arms spastically pulling him to his knees, where he rocks back on his haunches, clutching his wounded head and neck. Mary stands by the turnbuckles, alternately turning her wide-eyed gaze on Oscura and Jorgensen.] LVK: My God, he’s moving! RP: IT’S ALIIIIVE! IT’S ALLLIIIIIVE! LVK: But once again we must ask .... WHY is Mary out here? So far all she has managed to do is imperil Oscura’s life and limb while making eyes at Jorgensen! RP: That’s women, Van Keel. They’ll lead you by the nose, rip your heart out, and then get your head caved in with a steel chair. [As Moxley’s count approaches 7, a deafening “RAYA! RAYA! RAYA!” chant echoes across the Savvis Center ... and just as the count lingers in the silence between 9 and 10, Oscura manages a lunge that carries his head and shoulders under the bottom rope. The crowd pops as Moxley signals for the match to continue, but the pop dies as Jorgensen, with a wolfish grin, laces into Oscura with a series of boots to his wounded head, causing the Light Heavyweight champion to curl up in agony on the mat.] LVK: A COWARDLY ASSAULT! Oscura heroically pulled himself from the brink of defeat .... RP: Right into a size 11 steel-toed boot. Bad career choice. If he’d been counted out he could be in the back eating tamales through a straw in peace. [Jorgensen scoops the wounded Oscura up ... whips him to the ropes, and catches him on the comeback with a VICIOUS powerslam that snaps Oscura over with a massive crash, leaving him clutching his back and writhing on the mat! Jorgensen stands over the fallen Oscura and raises his fists to the heavens, bringing a rain of heat down on him from the solid Oscuramaniacs in the Savvis Center. Then Jorgensen, cackling madly, brings his gaze down ... on Mary, who gazes at him with wide eyes .. from the apron!] LVK: WHY IS SHE UP THERE?!? RP: It’s a SET-UP! HOW BRILLIANT! MARY’S REAL NAME MUST BE FRIGGA, AND SHE MUST BE JORGENSEN’S SECRET NORWEGIAN LOVER! LVK: Ah ... just what I was thinking, Rick. RP: Well, YOU EXPLAIN IT, BIG SHOT! [Jorgensen, seeing this, quickly steps between the ropes to the outside, and grasps Mary by the waist, taking her lightly down to the cement with him! Moxley leans between the ropes to admonish Jorgensen, but he is shoved back with one hand! Jorgensen takes Mary in his arms, and she gazes at him with VERY wide eyes, her palms resting lightly on his chest ...] RP: SEE?! SHE’S HIS SNOWBUNNY! LVK: What the HELL is going on?! [Jorgensen takes Mary closer, and closer, with only the faintest resistance ... and finally gets her in a LIPLOCK! She struggles for a moment as the crowd gives a SHOCKED POP! ... but then she appears to ... GO with it!] LVK: OH NO! RAYA OSCURA HAS BEEN BETRAYED! OH, THE HUMANITY! RP: NEVER TRUST A DAME! [Indeed, Mary seems to be settling in for the LONG haul with this kiss ... and even Gus Moxley looks on in shock as the kiss goes on .... and on ... and ..] LVK, RP, Moxley, Crowd, & Jorgensen: OOOOOOOOOOOOH! [EVERYONE gasps in painful sympathy as Erik Jorgensen’s crotch is suddenly introduced, at GREAT speed, to Mary’s KNEE! The Norwegian doubles over, groaning and clutching himself, and is knocked SILLY by a slap from Mary that sends him staggering back, one hand clutching his beleaguered jewels!] RP: Well, it WAS a set-up .... LVK: JUST NOT THE BAD KIND! RP: TELL THAT TO ERIK’S GROIN! LVK: INCOMING! [DEATH FROM ABOVE, indeed, as a recovering Raya Oscura DIVES off the top rope to the outside with a CORKSCREW MOONSAULT that SMACKS Erik Jorgensen silly! Jorgensen is BLASTED into la-la land and Oscura scoops him up, tosses him against the ring apron, and then rears back and BLASTS him in the jaw with a flipping dropkick that knocks Jorgensen in a tight roll into the ring! The Norwegian looks to be down and OUT as Oscura bows elegantly to Mary to a POP! from the crowd!] LVK: WHAT A COMEBACK! RP: Comeback-shmomeback. I was looking forward to seeing that guy get made into a Mexi-pancake. He’s still bleeding pretty heavy, though. LVK: You’re right, there, Rick! Raya Oscura may be indomitable, but he is NOT in good shape as he struggles up to the ring apron! This blood loss and repeated blows to the head has him dazed! [Oscura indeed looks wobbly as he pulls himself up to the apron and turns to the crowd, pumping his fist to get them jazzed ... and not looking directly at Erik Jorgensen, who has returned to his feet and is now running at Oscura. Mary screams, but too late ...] LVK & RP: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! [Jorgensen LEAPS to the second turnbuckle by Oscura and leaps AGAIN to the outside, CATCHING Oscura’s head as he comes down and DRIVING him into the floor with a JUMPING DDT OFF THE APRON! Oscura is FLATTENED, CRUSHED, and otherwise DECEASED! Ragnaraok gets to his feet, roaring!] LVK: DEAR GOD, FANS! JORGENSEN WITH A SCINTILLATING DDT NEARLY KILLS RAYA OSCURA! IF HE GETS HIM INTO THE RING, IT’S *GOT* TO BE OVER! RP: HECK WITH THAT! Oscura’s CAREER is OVER! His ABILITY TO EAT SOLID FOOD is OVER! And his TITLE REIGN is OVER! [Jorgensen, pointing at Mary and roaring with rage, sends her scurrying away while he scoops the absolutely unmoving Oscura onto his shoulder and rolls him into the ring. He slides after him and strides around, pointing at the blood that drips from Oscura’s head to the mat. With a raised fist, he brings a torrent of hatred down upon him from the Savvis Center fans, and with a hook of the leg, he makes the cover!] LVK: Oh, this fight is over, ladies and gentlemen! ONE!!! TWO!!!! THREE?!? NOT JUST YET! [The crowd goes POP-mad!] LVK: MY GOD! HOW DID HE DO THAT?!? RP: Amphetamines. It’s got to be amphetamines. LVK: REAL SUPERSTARS DON’T USE DRUGS, PERLE! [Jorgensen looks absolutely SHOCKED that Oscura managed to get a shoulder up. He gets up and gets RIGHT into Moxley’s face, DEMANDING that the referee acknowledge the three. Moxley SHOVES Jorgensen back, and REITERATES that it was a damned two, adding that if he doesn’t like it there are several places on Moxley’s body he could kiss. Jorgensen becomes nearly apoplectic, but then is distracted by being dropkicked in the back of the head.] LVK: WHOA, NELLY! HE’S BACK UP! RP: HOW DOES HE *DO* THAT?!? [Jorgensen is staggered, and Oscura capitalizes with another thrust kick to the base of the neck that drops Jorgensen like a stone! Oscura pulls him upright and hits him RIGHT in the throat with a knife-edge thrust that has the Norwegian gasping and dazed in agony. Oscura pumps his fist twice, runs to the ropes and REBOUNDS of the second rope, coming back with a moonsault ... MUTATING into an INVERTED DDT that plants Jorgensen into the mat like a gardenia with a god complex! He rolls Jorgensen up tight and Moxley drops to make the count!] LVK: THE BATTLE IS COMPLETE, FANS! ONE!!! TWO!!!! THR -- NOOOOOO! [Jorgensen powers out of the cradle and sends Oscura sprawling! A shocked Oscura pounds the mat in irritation, but goes immediately back to the attack! He catches Jorgensen with a low dropkick as Ragnarok comes to his knees, knocking him flat!] LVK: This battle just rages on, ladies and gentlemen! Neither man is willing to be put down! RP: They’re not battling for God and country, or for a pound of gold or silver, or even for the love of a dame like the deceptive lil’ minx on the outside, Van Keel ... it’s all about PRIDE, now, and who has the most of it! Who has the willingness to bleed and be bled for pride! LVK: Damned right, Rick. DAMNED right. And right now Raya is going at it full-tilt! [With the crowd popping madly, Oscura whips Jorgensen HARD into the far corner, and Erik slumps down to a seated position against the low buckle. Raya points to him and gestures dramatically, and the crowd pops as the masked man sets up the BRONCO BUSTER! He sprints towards Jorgensen, and ...] *KLANG!!!* LVK & RP: WHAT THE HELL?! LVK: WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS *THAT*!?! RP: HIS HAT?! LVK: WHAT?! RP: Oscura threw Jorgensen into HIS OWN corner, and Jorgensen WHIPPED that stupid metal winged hat he wears RIGHT between Raya’s eyes! And Oscura is OUT like a light! LVK: DEAR GOD! WHAT A MADMAN! Oscura might WELL be finished now, and Jorgensen grabs his legs and flips over, holding him in a reversed crab pin! RP: HERE COMES MOXLEY! Even HE looks shocked after that last stunt ... ONE!! TWO!!! GEEEZ! [The crowd pops like mad as once more Oscura manages to kick out. His mask is now soaked in blood, and Jorgensen has a bit of crimson adorning his own forehead. Gus Moxley is right at home amidst all that madness, and he signals the two count as Jorgensen rolls over, clinching his eyes shut and roaring in frustration at his inability to put Oscura away!] LVK: ANOTHER ESCAPE BY THE KING OF SHADOWS! RP: SOMEONE BREAK OUT THE FREAKIN’ KRYPTONITE! THIS MATCH MUST END! [Oscura barely manages to come to his feet, his mask sodden with flowing red, and is met by a shaky Ragnarok ... Jorgensen lays in a chop and hurls Oscura to the ropes ... Oscura puts on the brakes, turns and bounds OFF the second string, somersaulting forwards and catching the oncoming Jorgensen with a CLOTHESLINE! Jorgensen flips a full 180!] RP: HOLY MOSES!! LVK: Fans, I just don’t know the words to describe the tenacity of these two performers! They have wrenched each other through hell and back, and they are STILL going tooth and nail! RP: Oscura is bleeding like a FOUNTAIN and Jorgensen’s not looking any better for the wear and tear! They’re like MAD DOGS, I TELL YOU! [Oscura kips dizzily back to his feet after the devastating clothesline, and points at the fallen Jorgensen and then pumps his fist to the crowd! He nimbly across Erik Jorgensen’s prone form and over the top rope, and then pulls himself BACK across with a DEVASTATING slingshot legdrop to the throat! Jorgensen’s body flinches wildly ... ] LVK: SCINTILLATING! THAT’S GOT TO BE IT! ONE!! TWO!!! NOT EVEN!! LVK & RP: DAMMIT! [Jorgensen manages to jerk his shoulders free of the lateral press and actually power Raya off him. Oscura, incensed, kicks the bottom rope in frustration as Moxley holds up two fingers, and he approaches the fallen Erik.] LVK: What will it TAKE? RP: A gun? An atomic deathray? A cup of hot coffee to the groin? LVK: Shut up, Rick! Oscura is trying to put this one in the bag, folks, but he’s still weakening as blood continues to run down his hidden face! RP: We think! It might just be a bottle of barbeque sauce in there! [Oscura now whips Jorgensen to the ropes, and launches a spinning leg lariat as he comes back ... Erik ducks under the leg, and whirls around ... as Raya comes back to his feet, “Ragnarok” steps back, hops forward and launches a STIFF super kick that CRACKS into Raya’s jaw, toppling the masked man like a fallen tree! The crowd gasps as Jorgensen drops and hooks both of Oscura’s legs in the center of the ring! Mary shrieks!] LVK: THE TOUCH OF HELA! RP: The WHAT?! LVK: One of Jorgensen’s MANY Norse mythology-themed finishing maneuevers, and it might spell the end for the Light Heavyweight champion! ONE!!! TWO!!! THR -- NOOOOOO, NELLY! [The crowd, now near hoarse from popping, manages to pop once more as Oscura kicks free. Jorgensen pummels the mat with his fist in frustration, slowly pulling himself up the ropes and back to his feet as the exhausted Oscura simply lies there, breathing heavily and bleeding.] LVK: There’s simply no end to the reserves these two men have! There is no end to their willpower! No end to their competitive spirit! RP: No end to their blood supplies! At least there’d better not be, for their sakes ... folks at home, if you want to be a “part” of RCW, donate blood today and see that Raya Oscura and Erik Jorgensen get the transfusions they need. [Jorgensen lays in a few boots to the unmoving Oscura, and reaches down to scoop him off the mat, laughing ... only to be CAUGHT IN ...] LVK: EL DOLOR!!! EL DOLOR!!! RP: GOOD GOD, THAT’S HIDEOUS! HE’S LATCHED ONTO HIM LIKE A BARNACLE!! [In-DEED, as they say! Raya Oscura, in a miraculous move, has lunged up and hooked his legs and wrists around Erik Jorgensen’s outstretched arm, flipping the Norwegian over to the mat and CINCHING in the fearsome Fujiwara armbar! Jorgensen screams in pain, bellowing and kicking the mat as Oscura leans back into the hold. Moxley is IMMEDIATELY down by Jorgesen, checking the Norwegian who howls in pain, tossing back his blood-soaked blonde hair as the grim bleeding Mexican holds on, wrenching the arm!] LVK: THERE’S NO *WAY* Jorgensen can hope to escape! The match has gone on for too long ... there’s NO WAY OUT! OSCURA HAS HIM RIGHT WHERE HE WANTS HIM! RP: Wishful thinking, Van Keel! This guy’s got more guts than a roomful of Missouri housewives! [Jorgensen screams, straining the cords in his neck as his shoulder is bent back like a reed in the wind, and Oscura locks his limbs around the tortured arm of Jorgensen. Jorgensen DIGS the fingernails of his right arm INTO the mat, DRAWING his whole body AND that of Oscura’s ... TOWARDS the ROPES!] RP: HE’S NOT GIVING UP!?! LVK: THIS COMPETITION has TAKEN THESE MEN’S MINDS! JORGENSEN is REFUSING to surrender, at the cost of his own flesh and bone, and is SCRABBLING like a beetle towards the ropes! RP: He’s FREAKIN’ NUTS! [Jorgensen is still not surrendering, his whole body shaking in the throes of agony as he inches closer, and closer to the bottom rope! Blood runs down his forehead in scarlet trails and mixes with the blood left by Oscura on the mat. With a final scream, he lashes out with his right arm and seizes the rope! Oscura, snarling, releases the hold and rolls away!] LVK: DEAR GOD! ANOTHER ESCAPE! RP: This is like Russian freakin’ roulette! How long do they plan on escaping? They’re gonna end up in little pieces all over the mat! Someone get the broom! [Oscura has nearly worn out all his reserves with that attack, and comes back to his feet very slowly and tenderly, clutching his bleeding head. Jorgensen lies in a crumpled ball on the canvas, clutching his torn shoulder and grimacing. Oscura slowly works his way over to Jorgensen and pulls him up by the wrist, cinching in a wristlock that has the Norwegian man howling in agony ... Oscura starts to turn the arm again like a chicken on a spit, but is stopped cold by a kick to the gut from Jorgensen! As he doubles over, he’s nailed by an ELBOWDROP to the back of the head that plants him facefirst into the mat with a BRUTAL smash! The crowd groans as Oscura’s head rebounds off the canvas and Jorgensen rolls into the cover!] LVK: HEL’S PATH! RP: I won’t even ask ... but I’ll bet that’ll mess up that pretty Mexican face of his! ONE!!! TWO!!! NOOO!! [Once AGAIN, Oscura kicks out, and the crowd, entering an almost zen-like frenzy, POPS like mad animals. Jorgensen simply sags, groaning, as Oscura rolls over, clutching his face on the mat. ] RP: I DON’T FREAKIN’ GET IT! WHAT ARE THESE GUYS SMOKING?! LVK: SOMETHING FAR BEYOND THE KEN OF MORTAL MAN, RICK! THERE IS NO STOPPING THESE TWO!! NONE! NEITHER WILL GIVE UP! [Jorgensen, getting some renewed energy, comes surging to his feet, blood running freely down his face now, his left arm hanging almost limp at his side as he pulls a bloody, dazed rag-doll Oscura to his feet and tosses him to the ropes, levelling him as he comes back with a big boot! He bends down to get Oscura again ... and is met with a swift flashing kick to the forehead from the mat!] LVK: NOTHING CAN STOP RAYA OSCURA! RP: DOESN’T JORGENSEN OWN A GUN, DAMMIT?! A .45? PULL THAT SUCKER OUT AND POP A CAP IN THIS MEXIKRYPTONIAN! [Jorgensen staggers back, clutching his further-opened forehead as a new torrent of red gushes down, as Oscura ROLLS smoothly to his feet to a massive pop! With a grace that defies definition, Oscura runs for the buckles and springs, landing on the top rope and turning, and LEAPING! A thousand flashbulbs explode into photonic grace as Oscura whirls in mid-air, coming down across Jorgensen’s shoulders and HURLING himself back over into a pin!] LVK: MY GOD! A DRAGONRANA! A FLAWLESS DRAGONRANA FROM THE TOP!! RP: WHERE IN THE NAME OF GOD’S GREEN TOOTHBRUSH DID THAT COME FROM?! LVK: REGARDLESS of where it came from, it’s put Jorgensen’s shoulders to the mat! Here’s Moxley once more! ONE!!! TWO!!! THREE!! NOOOO!! LVK, RP & Crowd: OOOOOHHH! [Jorgensen manages to throw his weight backwards hard enough to roll Raya right off him and onto the mat, and Moxley stops with his hand just an INCH away from the canvas for the three-count. Shaking his head in amazement, he holds up his fingers once more, signalling the fateful “two”!] RP: I CAN’T TAKE THIS! MY HEART IS GOING! LIZZIE, IT’S THE BIG ONE! LVK: Settle DOWN, Rick! There MUST be an end in sight! These men, amazing athletes though they be, have reserves that are only SO deep! AN END IS COMING! RP: So you and all the other street preachers say! [Oscura simply lies on the mat, breathing deeply, recovering ... unbelieving, perhaps. Jorgensen, snarling insanely, pulls himself up with one arm in the corner, inch by inch. Oscura smoothly rolls to his feet, apparently ignoring the thick red blood that now patterns his whole bodysuit. One of his horns is crumpled, and one of the eyes behind his mask appears to be closed by swelling. Jorgensen’s left shoulder looks as if it may well be disjointed, and blood soaks his hair and runs down his body. Large bruises decorate his chest. The two simply stare at each other.] LVK: My God ... their intensity has not died by ONE DEGREE. Not ONE DAMNED IOTA. These two are filled with a desire to win that exceeds ... everything .. RP: It’s damned frightening, Van Keel. Especially since it seems that someone’s going to need about a thousand cc’s of sodium pentathol to put these two down ... [At an unspoken signal, the two opponents charge each other once more. Jorgensen unleashes a big boot, but Raya handsprings back out of the way. Jorgensen lashes out with a lariat, and Oscura ducks under it and attempts to hook in a hammerlock on the left arm ... Jorgensen launches a back elbow to Oscura’s head, knocking him back, and grabs him by the head, turning him over for a reverse neckbreaker ... Oscura counters by bracing his arms against Jorgensen’s shoulders and FLIPPING FORWARD to face him! He leaps for a dropkick, but Jorgensen catches him by the legs, brings him down to the mat and attempts to hook in a Boston crab ... Oscura kicks both legs and Jorgensen tucks and rolls, and both men come up standing and glaring at one another again! The crowd, for lack of anything productive to do, pops in AWE!] RP: What the HELL? LVK: Apparently there’s ... still a lot of ... spunk left in these two young men ... RP: SPUNK?! THAT WAS INSANITY! LVK: Well, they’re not done yet. [Oscura sprints at Jorgensen again. Jorgensen starts to swing a lariat at him, and as Oscura ducks, Jorgensen grins, does an about face, and rears back to NAIL a standing Oscura with a DEVASTATING *CHOP* to the THROAT that lets loose a crack that echoes across the arena! The crowd screams in horror as Oscura, clutching his throat, stands stock-still for a moment before plummeting facefirst to the canvas!] RP: SWEET CHRISTMAS! LVK: My GOD! That SWORD OF BALDUR might have KILLED Oscura! Jorgensen, laughing like a damned madman, makes the cover! RP: Geezus ... I think there’s chunks of Raya’s throat on the desk here! ONE!!! TWO!!! THRE ... DAMN THE MAN!! [Oscura kicks out once more, and the crowd pops in the half-sane surge of madness that has enveloped them during this interminable contest of wills! Moxley simply cannot believe it, and Jorgensen is literally frothing at the mouth as he gets to his knees, shaking his head and beseeching the heavens.] LVK: ANOTHER ESCAPE BY THE CHAMPION! THIS IS THE MOST STUNNING DISPLAY OF ATHLETICISM I’VE BEEN PRIVY TO ... in ... what are you DOING, Rick? RP: Hey, this isn’t a chunk of Oscura’s neck .. it’s a squished strawberry-mango Dot from a couple of weeks back! It must’ve gotten lodged in the fixings of the table! I think it’s still good! Want half? LVK: .... [Oscura has managed to get back to his feet as Jorgensen continues to pray to whatever gods might be listening to grant him just this one victory ... Oscura stands behind the kneeling Jorgensen, who apparently doesn’t see him! The crowd pops as Oscura raises his hands for a double chop to Jorgensen’s neck ... but is STOPPED cold as Jorgensen RAMS the back of his skull into Raya’s crotch!] LVK & RP: Ooooooooh! RP: THAT’S two pounds of Grand’ma’s nut butter right there. LVK: Graphic but true, Rick. [As Oscura doubles over, Jorgensen comes back to his feet and SWINGS a big hammer punch at Oscura’s skull .. but it is ducked and caught by the masked man, who lifts Jorgensen up in the air for a .... ] LVK: BACKDROP DRIVER!!! MY GOD, THE IMPACT! RP: That’ll BREAK HIS DAMNED NECK! [Unfortunately for Jorgensen, Oscura is not done yet, as he holds his grip on Erik’s waist and comes back to his feet for ANOTHER backdrop driver, crushing the Norwegian’s neckbones into the canvas with gruesome impact!] LVK: DEAR GOD! HE MIGHT BE BROKEN IN HALF! RP: NOW, COME ON! THAT’S JUST DAMNED SADISTIC! LVK: Sadistic, but necessary Rick! Oscura HAS to put Jorgensen down, and nothing else has managed to do it ... RP: So he’ll break his damned neck? LVK: They do what they have to! [Not quite finished, Oscura painfully rolls himself back up, holding the now-limp Jorgensen up on one shoulder, and teeters backwards with one more crushing, loose backdrop driver! Jorgensen’s head and neck bounce off the mat and Oscura crawls over and drapes one arm across for the cover! Moxley drops and ...] RP: SWEET MERCY, IT MIGHT BE OVER! ONE!!! TWO!!!! THREEE!!! NO! FOOT ON THE ROPE! FOOT ON THE ROPE! [The crowd groans in shock, their victorious pop cut off in mid-gasp. Jorgensen indeed managed to maneuver one foot onto the bottom rope, and Moxley caught it with microseconds to spare. He signals that the match must continue, and Oscura collapses to the mat, blood running in a halo around his head, as Jorgensen lies, clutching his neck with his one good arm, dragging himself toward the corner in an attempt to become upright. Oscura slowly struggles to come to his feet himself, as Moxley ponders administering a ten count to end the madness.] LVK: These two men might well go on until neither of them can move, if that’s what it takes. RP: That won’t take long at this rate. Judging from the staining of the canvas, their tights, and the floor mats, I’d say we’re looking at a 0.56 gallon loss of blood, collectively. LVK: WHAT? RP: I took pre-med as a minor. Lots of hot nurses, y’know. [Oscura, now having come fully to his feet, pumps his fist dizzily into the air, drawing a supportive pop from the crowd that intends to see this through to the end! Oscura strides towards Jorgensen, who hunches in the corner, and grabs him the shoulder, spinning him and ...] *KRUNCH!* LVK & RP: OH GOD! LVK: THOR ATTACK! THOR ATTACK! ERIK JORGENSEN JUST BURIED MJOLNIR RIGHT IN THE GUT OF RAYA OSCURA! AND NOW HE LEVELS HIM WITH THE WOODEN HAFT!! WHY IS MOXLEY ALLOWING THIS? RP: BECAUSE TWO MEN ENTER, ONE MAN LEAVES, VAN KEEL! [Oscura is dropped like a stone to the mat, clutching his midsection and writhing as if he suffered shattered ribs. Jorgensen kicks him in the face and drops a knee into his gut, causing Oscura to howl in pain, before dropping a leg across his throat and making the cover!] ONE!! TWO!! THREE? NOT JUST YET! LVK: JESUS H. CHRIST! RP: ARE THEY CONTROLLED BY ALIEN OVERLORDS WHO REFUSE TO LET THEM LIE DOWN? POSSESSED BY COMPETITIVE DEMONS? HIGH ON LIFE? LVK: Just damned fine athletes, Rick. Two of the finest. [Somehow, Oscura manages to twitch a shoulder upwards, despite clutching his ribs and bleeding so profusely that his vision must be obscured. Jorgensen, howling with rage, immediately lunges back for MJOLNIR ... only to find it in the hands of Gus Moxley! Moxley slams the steel head against his open palms a couple of times and shakes his head, discouraging Erik from further use of the hammer. Jorgensen rears back his right fist, but thinks better of it when he sees Moxley glare and lift the hammer. Clutching his left shoulder, Jorgensen snarls and turns to the still-fallen Oscura, lacing into him with kicks! Oscura writhes in pain as the kicks hit his damaged ribs. Jorgensen, satisfied with the beating for now, turns and points his right fist to the turnbuckles, and begins his arduous ascent!] LVK: My Lord in Heaven, this MAY BE IT! THE TALKING IS OVER! THE BLOOD HAS FLOWED! AND NOW RAYA OSCURA LIES HELPLESS ON THE MAT AS ERIK JORGENSEN TAKES AN UNPRECEDENTED CLIMB UP THE BUCKLES! RP: What is he DOING? Is he freakin’ NUTS? His arm doesn’t work, his neck doesn’t work, he’s bleeding like a stuck Norwegian pig ... can’t just beat Oscura with a spinning toe hold or something? LVK: Not tonight, Rick. One of these men must win, and they must win ... with STYLE! RP: Style-shcmyle. He doesn’t know what he’s doing! He’s delirious! But at least he’s not dead, like Oscura .... LVK: AND HE TAKES TO THE SKY! [Perched lightly on the top rope, wobbling, dripping scarlet rain to the mat. The crowd roars, beyond all reason, as he stands and spreads his arms wide ... roaring with mad laughter, he LEAPS in a beautiful swan dive headbutt .... and ...] LVK & RP: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!! *KRUNCHSLAMANCHKRUNCH!* [In a move so shocking that Gus Moxley falls over backwards, Raya Oscura rolls to his feet in the BLINK of an eye, reaches into the air and SNATCHES Jorgensen under both arms, LEAPING and LETTING GRAVITY AND MOMENTUM BRING THE NORWEGIAN MAN DOWN FACEFIRST INTO THE MAT WITH HIDEOUS IMPACT!!] LVK: LOS MUERTOS!!! LOS MUERTOS!!! LOS MUERTOS!!! LOS MUERTOS!!! LOS MUERTOS!!! RP: STOP SHOUTING BEFORE I RIP YOUR LUNGS OUT, VAN KEEL!!! JEEZUS, THIS JOB IS HIGH STRESS! LVK: MY GOD, HE PLASTERED HIM RIGHT INTO THE MAT! THERE’S BLOOD EVERYWHERE AND ERIK JORGENSEN IS OUT *COLD* FROM THE MOST GOD-DAMNED AMAZING MOVE I HAVE SEEN TONIGHT!! CROWD: RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RP: IF GUS MOXLEY’S HAND STILL WORKS, IT’S OVER! ONE!!!! TWO!!!! THREEEEE!!! *DING DING DING!* RA: YOUR WIIIIINER .... and *STILL* RCW LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHT *CHAMPION* .... RAAAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOOOOOOOSCUUUUUUUUUUUURAAAAA!!!! Crowd: RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! RCW!! [In the ring, Oscura flops limply off of Jorgensen’s unmoving body and thrashes on the mat, trying to recover from the adrenaline shock, blood loss, and severe internal damage this match has cost him. Gus Moxley and Mary, who returns from the place at ringside she has been cowering this whole time, helps him to his feet ... the bloody warrior stands aloft and the crowd goes absolutely berzerk as he hoists his gleaming belt aloft for the masses. He slumps helplessly into Mary’s arms, and Moxley signals for EMTs to clear the ring and determine if there’s any survivors.] LVK: My God .... I need a drink. RP: I’m getting too old for this. [EMTs rush down the aisle and start attending to Jorgensen. Oscura pushes them away, struggling to stay up by his own power, and stumbling forward to rest on the ropes and once again hold the belt high to a barrage of cheers.] LVK: What a champion fans, but he was pushed to the *very* edge of his being tonight by as worthy a challenger as has ever been put in the ring. Erik Jorgensen showed tonight that.... [Suddenly, thumping bassy techno music starts to play over the PA, and all attention turns to the aisleway.] LVK: What's going on now? [After a few more seconds, a figure bursts through the curtain, and stands at the top of the aisle. He is dressed in black tights and a white G-Pro t-shirt. His head is tightly concealed in a mask - the mask Lindsey Catalano found earlier. It is black with G-Pro on the forehead in yellow writing.] LVK: That's the mask we saw earlier - the one Lindsey found! RP: Only now it's got a head in it! Who is it though? LVK: I don't know, but he's making his way to the ring. This masked man, with obvious ties to the now-defunct Gunryo Pro promotion. [The masked guy walks down the aisle and slides into the ring behind Oscura, who is still celebrating with Mary.] LVK: The champ doesn't see.....er.... G-Pro Mask....coming! RP: G-Pro Mask? Wow, that's an original idea. [Fans scream and yell to try to make Oscura aware of what's behind him, but he and Mary still don't notice. The masked man grabs Oscura by the shoulder, spinning him around.....] LVK: OH! Kick to the gut by G-Pro Mask..... [HEEL POP!!!!] RP: OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! [G-Pro Mask scoops Oscura up into a fireman's carry, and then drives him into the mat with a Northern Lights Bomb. Mary backs away, screaming and yelling with a look of utter shock on her face.] LVK: OH LORD!!!! WHY IS THIS MASKED MAN DOING THIS?!?!? WHY IS HE ATTACKING THE LIGHT-HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION AFTER HE JUST WRESTLED A GRUELLING MATCH?!? [The masked man stands over Oscura, who isn't moving, as Mary falls into a heap and starts weeping loudly. The boos are now deafening, and a few pieces of trash begin to fire into the ring.] LVK: Hey! If this mystery guy was in G-Pro, and he just used that move....a move that I vaguely recognise.... [Before Larry can do any more mental logistics, the masked attacker reaches up and grabs at the mask. In one motion he pulls it away from his head....] . . . . . . . . . . RP: HIM?! LVK: TORA WANIZAME!!!! THE JAPANESE SUPERSTAR HAS COME TO RCW!!!!! [Some of the fans cheer as they recognise the "Oita Tiger Shark", former EMWC and G-Pro and current GLCW superstar. Wanizame smiles as he takes in the thunderous mixed pop, and then looks down at Oscura, who is out cold, and sneers.] RP: What a way to make an entrance! He walks in here and knocks out the Light-Heavyweight champ!!! I LOVE IT!!!! LVK: You would! Here comes security, but the damage has already been done! [Security swarms the ring, and Wanizame slides out, still smiling broadly. He walks up the aisle to a huge heel pop.] LVK: TORA Wanizame has apparently joined the ranks of RCW, and has gone right after the best light-heavyweight wrestler in the business! RP: We'll see about that Van Keel. I have a feeling Wanizame disagrees. LVK: What a night fans! The surprises just keep on coming, and now it's main event time!!! [The camera changes to show the cage high above the ring. Again the lights dim and spotlights bounce off the steel structure. With a groan the cage begins to slowly lower.] LVK: Here we go! The Rage in the Cage structure is being put into place! RP: Woohoo! LVK: While this is happening, let's take a look at some of the background between the four men who will be stepping into the cage in a few moments..... [Fade out.] [Begin video package.] [We begin with footage from the first Total Impact supercard, in November 2000. It says so at the bottom of the screen. It's the main event tournament final between Chris Hopper and Alex Extreme - the winner becoming the inaugural National Champion. Eric Vanguard is in the middle of interfering in the match...] [The fans scream in protest as Eric Vanguard brings the nightstick down on Hopper's head, knocking the Indiana superstar down hard. This turns to a deafening chorus of boos, as Vanguard picks up Hopper and hooks him in a pumphandle set-up......] RP: LETHAL INJECTION!!! LETHAL INJECTION!!!! LVK: This is wrong!! WRONG!!! [The fans' boos go up a notch as Vanguard nails his pumphandle, sit-out tombstone piledriver. It drives Hopper into the mat, and leaves him out cold. Vanguard drags Extreme over and pulls him on top of Hopper's unmoving frame. He then kicks the referee a couple of times, rousing him, and slides from the ring.] LVK: This is SO WRONG!!! RP: Here's the count...... ONE!! TWO!!!!! THREEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EXTREME WINS!!!!! EXTREME IS THE CHAMPION!!!!!!! [The fans boo, and quite a bit of trash comes flying into the ring. Extreme rolls off of Hopper, still not realising what is happening.] LVK: Eric Vanguard is simply a very sick and twisted man! He lost to Hopper in the semifinal, but he couldn't bear to see his arch-rival win the National title! RP: Well, Eric doesn't like Extreme much either, but I guess Extreme getting the title is more acceptable for him than Hopper with the belt. [Extreme gets to his feet slowly, as the referee hands him the National title belt. His eyes pop open in understanding, and he lifts the belt high into the air. The boos are still deafening.] LVK: Chris Hopper has been robbed of the National title! RP: Quite your bitching Van Keel. Alex Extreme is the new National Champion, and there isn't a damn thing you, Hopper or these punkhead fans can do about it! [Extreme climbs to a second turnbuckle, and lifts the belt into the air, a huge grin on his face. He is met with yet more boos.] RA: Your winner.....and the VERY FIRST NATIONAL HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION....... ....."MR EXCITEMENT" ALEX EXTREME!!!!!!!!! LVK: Alex Extreme will probably not want to admit it, but he owes Eric Vanguard for becoming the first National champion. [splice] [Next up we get footage from the December 4 Impact. Again it says so at the bottom of the screen. Alex Extreme is making his first appearance as National Champion.] AE: So let me make myself clear: I'm "Mr. Excitement" Alex Extreme, The RCW National Champion. You may not like it but you better learn to respect it because I'm going to be champion for a very long time. [splice] [Chris Hopper is in the stands, answering back to Extreme's comments.] CH: Ok, I'm gonna wrap this up quick because my peeps and I have some partying to do since...well you know...I'm the __UNCROWNED RCW NATIONAL CHAMPION__ and all. [splice] [Eric Vanguard has also joined in on this three-way strutting contest.] EV: Being the most gracious fellow that I am, I am going to finally let you get some rest, because NO QUESTIONS ASKED...on Sunday Night January 28, 2001 it will be Eric Vanguard not only contending, but walking out with the belt that *I* beat Chris Hopper for." [splice] AE: "You two want to make each others life a nightmare? Well next week you get that chance because Chris Hopper YOU will be facing Eric Vanguard in a tag team match! BUT here is the catch, neither one of you get to pick your OWN partner...OH NO! Eric instead how about we have YOU pick Chris' partner and Chris, you get to pick Eric's! And the man that scores the pinfall will in fact face ME at "Caged Rage"!!!" [Next we jump forward to the December 11 Impact - and the aforementioned tagteam match.] [Alex Extreme walks down the aisle.] LVK: ALEX EXTREME!!! THE NATIONAL CHAMPION IS HOPPER'S PARTNER!!! RP: Beautiful! Hopper and Extreme hate each other! Vanguard is a genius! [splice] [Eric Vanguard pushes Jordan towards their team's corner, and then turns back to face Hopper and Extreme.] DING! LVK: There's the bell, so I guess Bryce Jordan *is* Vanguard's partner! RP: Yeah! Hopper doesn't stand a chance! [splice] [Vanguard puts his head up between Jordan's shoulders and grabs his arms. He spins around, with Jordan on his shoulders, and drops back.....] LVK: OCEAN CYCLONE SUPLEX ONTO EXTREME!!!! [splice] LVK: JORDAN GETS THE PIN!!! VANGUARD'S TEAM WINS!! RP: But who gets the title shot? Vanguard or Jordan? [Next up, December 18 Impact. You see a pattern here? Jim Catanzaro stands in the ring, a mic in his hand.] JC: Since there is no clear number one contender for the National title right now, I'm putting the three top contenders - that's you two and Hopper - into a round-robin series. Three men, three matches, and the one with the most wins at the end gets the shot at Extreme. [splice] [Rapid-fire clips of the three round-robin matches, one on December 18, and two on January 15.] [The Leading Men look on just as shocked as they pull a bloody Bryce Jordan back to his feet and join in Referee Gus Moxley as begins his count.] ONE! TWO! [RCW Officials begin to rush out of the locker room as Vanguard lies face down in a pile of broken wood, shattered glass, smoldering flames, and bent steel.] THREE! FOUR! LVK: "Folks, I can not believe what we have just witnessed!" FIVE! SIX! RP: "I've seen men go through tables - I've seen men fall from heights - but in all my years as a professional, I have NEVER seen anything like what we just saw!" SEVEN! EIGHT! LVK: "You'll have to excuse the lack of drama, but there is NO WAY IN HELL that Vanguard is going to get back up!" NINE! TEN! [Referee Gus Moxley quickly turns and calls for the bell as officials move in to check on Eric Vanguard. The sounds of "Original Prankster" fill the arena as Bryce Jordan and The Leading Men embrace in the ring. Icepick and Viper stand by in shocked silence as security undoes their handcuffs.] LVK: "I don't think there is anything that can truly be said right now to do this justice. These men literally KILLED themselves tonight - and if Eric Vanguard ever WALKS again, I'll be shocked!" [splice] [Chris Hopper and Bryce Jordan battle atop a scaffold, with tables set up below. Hopper sets Jordan up in a standing headscissors, next to a hole in the scaffold...] RP: "UH-OH!!!!!" LVK: "GOOD NIGHT BRYCE!!!!!" [The fans, knowing what is coming take to their feet in unison as the camera pans over the face of Bryce Jordan as he mouths the word...] TBJ: "SHIT!" [In one motion, Chris Hopper throws Bryce Jordan off of his shoulders and through the opening in the scaffold with a jackknife powerbomb.] * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * * CRACK * CROWD: RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! RCW! [As splinters of wood and steel fly in every direction, a relieved Chris Hopper drops to his knees in celebration.] LVK: "HE DID IT! CHRIS HOPPER DID IT! He's now one step closer to FINALLY getting his showdown with Alex Extreme at Caged Rage! But to realize that dream, he has to first contend with..." [splice] [It's the First Blood match between Hopper and Vanguard. The referee gets to his feet, as Vanguard gives his own face another wipe, and then throws away the t-shirt, much to the anger of the fan he got it off. Gehl takes a few moments to realise where he is, and then staggers over to Vanguard and Hopper. He looks down and see the blood seeping over Hopper's face.....] DING DING DING!!!! LVK: NOOO!!! GEHL CALLS FOR THE BELL - I THINK HE'S GIVING IT TO VANGUARD!!!! RP: HA HA!!! [Gehl points at Hopper's bloody face, and then raises Vanguard's arm, to a MONSTROUS HEEL POP!] LVK: THIS IS WRONG!! VANGUARD CLEARLY BLED FIRST!!! RP: Oh cry me a river Van Keel. Hopper lost, deal with it. [splice] LVK: ...the round-robin series is over, and it's tied up! All three wrestlers have a win and a loss! RP: Now what? LVK: I have no idea. I guess we'll have to wait and see what Jim Catanzaro has to say about it. [splice] [Finally we see Jim Catanzaro in the ring on the January 22 edition of Impact, the last before this supercard.] Catanzaro: Alex, at Caged Rage, you'll defend your title against only two of the three men who share the top contender's spot. Instead of a four-way dance, I'm going to make the main event at Caged Rage a tagteam match inside the Hell in the Cell cage. [Confused pop.] Catanzaro: Here's the deal. Alex, you get to choose which of the three you want as your partner, and the two you don't choose will form your opposition. If either of those two men pins you, they become champion. [splice] [Alex Extreme is in the ring, ready to announce his decision.] Extreme: Vanguard, next week you're gonna be in a cellblock which ain't gonna be under your control. Welcome to my world little man - enjoy your prison bitch. A world were I control the punishment: with you as my partner, you can't be the champion and that just makes me way too happy. [Fade to black] [End video package] [The scene fades back in to Larry and Rick.] LVK: So, that's how we got to this match. A long series of battles, promises and match stipulations. In the end none of it could decide the number one contender to Alex Extreme's title, so we get this tagteam match inside the Rage in the Cage. RP: Yep, and as we saw earlier, Vanguard has a reason to help Extreme now. If he helps Extreme win, he gets a title shot *tonight*! LVK: And conversely, if Hopper or Jordan pin Extreme, they win the National title. There's plenty for each man to fight for, and plenty of bad blood between the two teams, and *within* the two teams. It all adds up to one hell of an emotionally-charged situation! [The camera returns to the ring, showing the cage in place.] LVK: The time for talking is over. It's time for....THE MAIN EVENT!!!! __ ___ __ ______________________________________________________________ | _ \ / _\\ \ / / | U < | |_ \ \/\/ / Main event - Rage in the Cage tagteam match |_|\_\\___/ \_/\_/ [National Heavyweight Championship on the line] \ TOTAL IMPACT \ "Mr Excitement" Alex Extreme and "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard "CAGED RAGE" \ vs \ "Too Cool" Chris Hopper and "Trendy" Bryce Jordan \_______________________________________________________________ written by: Fletch RA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a tagteam match inside the Rage in the Cage! [POP!] The stipulations are as follows.....if either Chris Hopper or Bryce Jordan pin Alex Extreme, they become the new National Heavyweight Champion. But if Extreme and Vanguard win, then they will battle for the National title *tonight*! [POP!] [A loud voice booms over the PA system.] VOICE: MAKE WAY FOR THE KING OF COOL !!! [The lights go out suddenly as the beginning strums of "TNT" by AC/DC start to blare over the loudspeakers. The crowd erupts with a huge face pop as the screen lights up with images of "Too Cool" Chris Hopper. The music plays for a bit and then burst into the chorus.] # CHORUS: # # 'Cause I'm # #T.# [Quick clip of the final second of Hopper landing the Icebreaker on Trixxter at "Holiday Horror 2000". Followed by a Black letter "T" filling the screen for a second.] #N.# [Quick clip of the final second of Hopper landing a powerbomb on Jim Lewis Jr. at the "Ides of March" PPV. Followed by a Black letter "N" filling the screen for a second.] #T.# [Quick, slightly accelerated clip of the plancha he hit on "STB" James Pillow in their "I Quit" encounter on "UEW Sunday Night Heat". Followed by a Black letter "T" filling the screen for a second.] #I'm dynamite # [Clip of Hopper's eight foot tall name molding exploding at the entranceway during a TV show. Fireworks are blazing all around.] #T.# [Quick, slightly accelerated clip of Hopper clamping on the STF that sent Rick Styles screaming "I Quit and running from UEW. Followed by a Black letter "T" filling the screen for a second.] #N.# [Quick clip of Hopper landing the Icebreaker on Doc Holliday through a table on Monday Night Heat. Followed by a Black letter "N" filling the screen for a second.] #T.# [Quick, slightly accelerated clip of Hopper tossing Alex Extreme through a Chicago business' store window during "REVENGE 2000". Followed by a Black letter "T" filling the screen for a second.] # and I'll win the fight # [Camera swings away from the screen at this point.] RA: Introducing first......weighing in at 288 pounds.....from Paoli, Indiana..... ...."TOO COOL" CHRIS HOPPPEEEEEEEERRRRR!!!!!! [Hopper then enters the arena and the attention is off the big screen. The music continues through the chorus Hopper struts down to the ring. Hopper is wearing a T-shirt that says "Icebreaker" over a picture of a sinking ship on the front. He is smiling, but stops and looks at the forbidding scene of the steel cage before him, and determined look comes over his face. He continues to stare for a few seconds, and then continues down to the cage, stepping through the steel door and then sliding into the ring.] RP: I hope Hopper has good life insurance, because he's stepping into the cage with three men who'd love to tear him limb from limb. LVK: That could be said for all of the four men in this match. I don't think we'll be seeing any alliances in that cage tonight! [As the opening chords to Offspring's "Original Prankster" fill the arena, the crowd already begins to boo and chant "SCRUB" They know who's coming out and as the song continues the crowd keeps up it's taunts and boos. After a short while, Andrew comes down the aisle and tries to silence the crowd to no avail.] RA: And his partner....hailing from parts unknown, and weighing in at 233 pounds..... ......"THE TRENDY ONE"....... ............BRYCE JOOOOOOOORRRRRRDDAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!!! [As the song hits a high point, the lights go dimmer and a spotlight hits "Trendy" Bryce Jordan who appears at the top of teaisle and smiles, dressed in pointing to the booing crowd as if they're cheering him. He goes down the aisle, trying to slap the fan's hands and is a little uncomfortable at the lack of response. When he reaches the steel cage, he looks at it with a momentary look of fear in his eyes, and then stares through it to Hopper waiting inside.] LVK: It looks to me like Bryce Jordan is having second thoughts about signing up for this match. The Rage in the Cage construction is definitely an awesome sight. [Finally Jordan climbs through the cage door and walks around the ringside area inside, before sliding into the ring, studying Hopper with a weary look.] [The lights in the Savvis Center slowly start to fade to black - as a spotlight begins to scan over the capacity crowd. The sounds of footsteps running in the darkness echo from one side of the building - and then from the other - making it appear as though someone is out amongst the fans. The running feet are soon replaced by the deafening blare of an air raid siren as a garbled voice can be heard screaming...] Voice: "All units ... be prepared ... we have a JAILBREAK!" [As the last words echo through the rafters a small display of pyrotechnics erupts in front of the entrance tunnel. As the smoke begins to slowly clear in the darkness a series of laser lights begin bouncing around the building, spelling out the words "Cellblock 2000" in the aisle as "Bow Down" by Nine Inch Nails soon begins to play over the sound system. The lasers finally focus on the end of the aisle as they create a jail bar like effect, as a figure stands in the shadows.] RA: .....from Los Angeles, California...weighing in at 277 pounds..... ......"EXCESSIVE FORCE" ERIC VAAAAAAAAANGUARD!!!!!! [A pusating light soon zooms in on the face of the ornery former prison guard as he slaps his nightstick against the palm of his hand. As strobe lights flash up and down the aisle, Vanguard makes his way through the wall of lasers - walking towards the ring at an extremely agressive pace. As fans reach out to try to pat the superstar on the back, he extends a hand in their direction, giving them the middle finger. As he arrives at ringside he leaps up onto the ring apron with one knee, before pulling himself to a vertical base and turning towards the fans. With a deep breath, Vanguard leans back against the ropes and lets out an "angry man's scream" as flash bulbs explode around the building. An arrogant smirk soon crosses the face of the former prison guard as he tears his leather bandana from his head and flings it in the face of a ringside attendant as "Bow Down" fades out.] LVK: Vanguard as "charming" as ever. RP: Hey, you could be talking about the next National Champion there Van Keel. [Suddenly, the lights go out. Then strobe lights randomly flash through the darkness and surging hazy purple smoke as Eminem's "The Way I Am" starts to blast through the speakers at full tilt, bringing a HUGE FACE POP.] FFFFFFFFFFFFFFSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! [A white light blinds the the crowd as the arena then goes pitch black again.] (KAABOOM!!!) (KAABOOM!!!) (KAABOOM!!!) (KAABOOM!!!) [Through the smoky purple haze and pyro walks Alex Extreme . The spotlights converge on "Mr Excitement" as they alternate from white, blue, pink, and purple. Extreme, wearing a black and neon blue leather jacket, a black t-shirt with a big huge clumsly splashed big X in neon purple on it, Ray Ban wafer shades and a pair of neon blue and black swirled spandex pants, glistens in the arena lights as he throws a few lefts and rights into the air and heads to ringside.] RA: And his opponent, the reigning National Heavyweight Champion...... ......weighing 240 pounds, from Chicago, Illinois....here is.... ....."MR EXCITEMENT" ALEX EXTREEEEEEMMMMMEEEEEE!!!!!!! [Extreme walks through the cage door, never taking his eyes off of the three men in the ring. He then slides into the ring and turns to the crowd, throwing a fist into the air and bringing a huge FACE POP!] LVK: OH YEAH!!! The champ has arrived, and now the four marquee names in RCW are in the cage, and ready to tear the house down! DING! LVK: IT'S ON!!! Vanguard and Hopper are going to start things off! [A big pop sounds as Vanguard and Hopper rush at each other mid-ring, colliding with a collar-and-elbow tieup. The 6'8 288 pound Hopper uses his slight size advantage over the 6'6 277 pound Vanguard to whip him into the ropes, and the two collide with shoulderblocks. Neither goes down, and out of frustration Vanguard swings a big right-hand punch, which Hopper blocks. Hopper lands with his reply, and then sends Vanguard into the ropes again......] LVK: Side slam by Hopper! The feeling-out process we see in most matches is non-existent here, as both men are going straight for the kill! RP: Hopper and Vanguard know each other's gameplans too well for anything else. And boy do they hate each other. [Both men are back to their feet, and Hopper stuns Vanguard with a couple of European uppercuts, before moving in behind him....] LVK: Belly to Back Suplex!!! Here's the cover by Hopper! ONE!! TWO...and a kickout by Vanguard! [Both are back to their feet, and Hopper whips Vanguard into a corner, Vanguard landing backfirst against the turnbuckles. Hopper rushes in, but Vanguard hoists one of his legs into the air, stopping Hopper with a boot to the face. Vanguard quickly grabs Hopper and whips *him* across the ring into the opposite corner. Hopper runs chestfirst into the top turnbuckle......] LVK: OH! Lariat from behind by Vanguard!! RP: He's got Hopper....RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX!!! LVK: Vanguard with the cover! ONE!! TWO!!! Shoulder up! [Both men roll to their feet, and Vanguard grabs the stunned Hopper and bodyslams him back to the mat near a neutral corner. After pointing down at Hopper and mouthing a bit, which brings some boos, Vanguard goes to the corner and climbs to the second turnbuckle.....] LVK: And Vanguard with a knee-dr-HOPPER MOVED!!! RP: The point of his knee drove right into the mat! Ouch! [Vanguard, now lying on the mat, grabs at the knee with a shocked look on his face. Hopper quickly gets to his feet, and wrenches Vanguard back to a vertical base. He hooks him in a suplex set-up....] LVK: Vertical suplex by Chris Hopper! And now a cover! ONE!! TWO!! And Vanguard kicks out easily! RP: He expected to get the pin from a vertical suplex? What a dumbass. [Both men again return to their feet, and Hopper grabs Vanguard in a side-headlock. Suddenly a hand reaches out and slaps Hopper hard on the back. Hopper immediately lets go of Vanguard and turns around to see what it is.....] LVK: BRYCE JORDAN JUST SLAPPED CHRIS HOPPER.....HIS PARTNER! RP: Um, that wasn't a slap. It was a tag! [Indeed, referee Gus Moxley signals that the tag was made, as Hopper begins arguing with Jordan. But with his attention off of Vanguard, the former prison guard easily walks up behind Hopper, spins him around, and lariats him over the top rope. Hopper goes crashing to the floor, and Vanguard stands at the ropes looking down at him, a look of pure arrogance spreading across his face. Bad mistake.....] LVK: OH! JORDAN WITH A DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF VANGUARD, WHICH SENDS VANGUARD CRASHING TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!!! RP: He's the legal man now - Vanguard should have realised that. [Vanguard gets back to his feet at ringside, and is immediately punched by Hopper. Vanguard blocks a second punch and sends "Too Cool" crashing headfirst into the cage.] LVK: WE KNEW IT WOULDN'T TAKE LONG UNTIL THE REAL ACTION STARTED!!! RP: Yeah! Kick his ass Vanguard! [Vanguard grabs Hopper by the hair and starts grating his forehead and face along the wire meshing of the cage. A few squeamish fans scream as Hopper grunts in pain, and finally pulls away, a stripe of blood forming on his forehead. But he isn't about to give up, he kicks Vanguard in the gut, and then whips him across the ringside area, sending him crashing into the cage.] LVK: Referee Gus Moxley now trying to break them up so that the legal men can continue the match. [Moxley tells Hopper to return to his corner, which he does reluctantly, and Vanguard slides back into the ring. Jordan is standing waiting, but surprisingly he doesn't attack. Instead he points across the ring to Extreme, making a "I want the belt" signal.] LVK: Jordan now calling out the champ, and don't think for a second that Alex Extreme will turn it down! RP: Bryce is thinking though. He can't win the title by pinning Vanguard, so get Extreme in the ring! [The fans pop as they anticipate Extreme's first entry into the match. Vanguard gets to his feet and looks at Jordan, then reluctantly slaps hands with Extreme. The champ vaults over the top rope into the ring. FACE POP!] LVK: And now the champ's in, and ready to go at it with the young Upstart who has been a thorn in his side for months now. RP: He's only a thorn because Extreme knows that Bryce is gonna beat him and become the new champion, so Extreme bitches and moans and cries, and hides behind Catanzaro's skirt. LVK: Catanzaro? Have you even been paying attention? Extreme has a strong dislike for Catanzaro, and another thing, Alex Extreme does not duck challenges. [Jordan and Extreme stand looking at each other, Extreme locking a determined stare on Jordan, while Jordan smiles and taunts. He holds up two fingers, then makes the "belt" hand-signal, and finally holds up three fingers. Extreme snaps, rushing at Jordan, and pounding him with punches.] LVK: OH BOY! Jordan threw gasoline on the fire by reminding Extreme that he has beaten him twice in the past, and by showing that he wants to make it a hat-trick! [Jordan isn't even able to get any offence in, as Extreme backs him into the ropes with a series of bruising punches. Finally Extreme whips Jordan across the ring into the ropes, and then flattens him with a spinning leg lariat. FACE POP as Extreme stands over the fallen Jordan, a picture of pure seething fury.] RP: Whoa! The champ is fired up tonight! LVK: Indeed he is. And he'll need to be if he's going to walk out of this cage with the National title belt. [Extreme drags Jordan to his feet by his hair, and attempts to whip him into the ropes, but Jordan reverses it. Extreme comes rebounding off the ropes, and Jordan ducks down and performs a back-bodydrop. The champ flips right over and lands on his feet, and Jordan spins around in confusion. Extreme kicks him in the gut, and quickly drapes his right leg across the back of Jordan's neck as Jordan hunches over. But before he can perform a Rocker Dropper, Jordan straightens into a standing position, sending Extreme flipping over backwards. He lands on his feet though, and jumps up, hooking his legs around Jordan's head.....] LVK: Flying headscissors by Extreme! RP: What a series of quickfire reversals and moves! [Both men spring back to their feet, and Extreme jumps up and aims a dropkick at Jordan. Jordan ducks to the side though, leaving Extreme to fall facefirst on the mat. Jordan follows up by running into the ropes as Extreme gets to his feet. The champ bends down to execute a back-bodydrop of his own, but Jordan leaps over him.....] LVK: SUNSET FLIP BY JORDAN! ONE!! TWO!!! [Extreme not only kicks out, but rolls over backwards in the sunset flip pin, landing on his feet and driving Jordan's legs, pinning Jordan's shoulders into the mat.] LVK: REVERSAL!! ONE!! TWO!!!! BUT NO! Kickout by Jordan! [The crowd applauds for the sheer athleticism being shown by both wrestlers. They both get back to their feet, and Jordan rushes at Extreme. The champ stops him short with a dropkick, which sends Jordan back to the mat. He gets Jordan back to his feet......] LVK: BULLDOG!!! Here's the cover by Extreme! ONE!! TWO!!! TH-NO! Kickout again! RP: He clearly had a handful of tights! LVK: He did not! [After nailing Jordan with a super-quick snap suplex, Extreme runs to the ropes and climbs out onto the apron....] RP: Extreme's running away! LVK: No he's not. He's..... [Extreme jumps up and springboards off the top rope. But Jordan has got back to his feet, and he leaps into the air as well. The result is Extreme flying straight into a Bryce Jordan dropkick.] LVK: OH! The quickness of these two superstars is simply amazing! But then Extreme is around 240 pounds, and Bryce Jordan qualifies as a light-heavyweight, or as Rick would say, as a "wimpweight". RP: I would *never* call Bryce a wimpweight! [As Extreme lays stunned on the mat, Jordan gets to his feet and climbs through the ropes to the apron....] LVK: It looks like Jordan is going to try the same! RP: GUILLOTINE LEGDROP!! LVK: Jordan hooks the leg...... ONE!! TWO!!! TH-SHOULDER UP!!!! [FACE POP!] [Jordan gets back to his feet, but wanders a little too close to his own corner. Hopper reaches out and slaps him on the shoulder. Jordan spins around, and Hopper cold-cocks him with a punch to the face. POP! Jordan goes down, and Hopper climbs into the ring.] LVK: OH BOY! Hopper returning the favour to Jordan, by forcing a tag on him the way Jordan did earlier in the match! RP: What about the punch? Was that *really* necessary? LVK: No, but it rocked! [Hopper waits for Extreme to get back to his feet, and then whips the champ into the ropes. Extreme ducks under a lariat attempt, and rebounds again. This time he jumps up.....] LVK: TILT-A-WHIRL BACKBREAKER BY HOPPER!!! ONE!! TWO!!! NO!!!! [Hopper again gets Extreme to his feet, and sets him up in a standing headscissors. The fans scream and yell as he hoists Extreme into the air.....] LVK: AND A POWERBOMB BY HOPPER!!! THIS COULD BE IT!!! ONE!! TWO!!! NO! SHOULDER UP! [LOUD FACE POP!] [Hopper, a look of determination on his face, drags a wobbly Extreme up again, and again he sets him up in the standing headscissors....] RP: Is he going for another powerbomb? LVK: I think he is.....if he hits it, it could be all over!!! [He hoists Extreme up, but Extreme has the state of mind to flip through with the momentum and grab Hopper's head, slamming it hard facefirst into the mat as he lands in a sitout position.] LVK: FACESLAM!! THE CHAMP IS COMING BACK!!! [Both men take a few moments to get up, and then Extreme nails Hopper with a couple of punches. He then sends Hopper into the ropes, nailing him with a beautiful handspring back-elbow on the rebound, which brings a loud FACE POP! Extreme kips up to his feet, to another pop, and Hopper slowly gets to his feet.....] LVK: DDT BY EXTREME!!!! RP: But he's not covering him! He's climbing the turnbuckles! [Extreme quickly scales the ropes to the top, and without hesitation springs off the top turnbuckle, to a HUGE FACE POP!] RP: MOONSAULT!!!! LVK: This could be it..... ONE!! TWO!!! But Jordan breaks the count! He obviously realises that he can't win the title if Hopper loses, so he is putting his animosity with Hopper to one side! RP: Bryce just saved that fat punkhead from getting pinned, but do you think Hopper'll be grateful? Nope. Hopper is grateful to only one person...himself. In fact, from what I've heard, he's very self-gratifying, if you know what I mean. [Both men slowly get back to their feet, Hopper shooting a distrustful glance at Jordan, who returns it. Extreme nails Hopper with a kneelift, and then backs him into a corner. He leaps up, going for a huracanrana, but Hopper holds onto the top rope with both hands, preventing him from being flipped over. Extreme's legs break free of Hopper's head, and the champ lands hard on his head on the mat.] LVK: Chris Hopper showing great resiliency there by blocking the huracanrana, and now he's got hold of Extreme.....gutwrench..... RP: Splat! LVK: GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB!!! HOPPER WITH THE PIN!!! ONE!! TWO!!! T-WHAT? Jordan broke up *another* pinfall attempt, but this time it was his teammate who was doing the pinning! RP: Do you think Bryce wants that fat has-been to win the title? Hell, might as well leave it on Extreme if those are the choices. But there's no choice to be made - Bryce is taking home the gold tonight! [Hopper gets to his feet, and he and Jordan start arguing in a very animated fashion, with lots of finger-pointing, yelling and gesturing. Soon it turns to shoving, which gets the fans cheering like crazy!] LVK: I think the concept of these two unlikely tagteams working together is about to be shot to pieces! Hopper and Jordan have had enough....of each other! RP: Look out behind you Bryce! [Of course, Rick's warning goes unheard and unheeded, so Jordan doesn't see Extreme on his knees, inching up behind him. Extreme reaches up and grabs him in a schoolboy roll-up....] LVK: ROLL-UP BY EXTREME!!! OH! But Hopper broke it with a kick to the gut of Extreme. And that brings in Vanguard! HERE WE GO!!!! [Vanguard rushes Hopper, stunning him with a punch to his already-bloody head, as Jordan and Extreme get to their feet and start trading blows. HUGE POP! Hopper and Vanguard are now going blow-for-blow, but Vanguard's are having the more obvious effect. Hopper staggers back into the ropes, and Vanguard lariats him over the top to the floor!] LVK: OUT GOES HOPPER, AND NOW JORDAN IS UP AGAINST VANGUARD *AND* EXTREME!!!! RP: NO! [Vanguard and Extreme grab Jordan and whip him into the ropes. As Jordan comes rebounding back, Vanguard and Extreme step to the side and grab hold of an arm each. They move with Jordan's momentum, and half-throw, half-hiptoss him over the top rope and into the unforgiving side of the cage. Jordan hits hard facefirst and then falls to the ringside floor between the cage and the ring. HUGE POP!] RP: HOLY CRAPPEROONI! THOSE BASTARDS!!! LVK: Bryce Jordan just did his impression of a bird when it doesn't see the glass in a closed window. He he! RP: Shut up Van Keel! Bryce could be seriously hurt! [The camera zooms in on Jordan, who is wincing as he rolls around on his back. A stream of blood trickles down over his right eye.] LVK: Nope, just bloody! [Vanguard slides from the ring to go after Hopper, and they begin brawling in the area between the cage and the ring. Extreme stays in the ring, watching Jordan. After a few moments, Jordan begins slowly climbing to his feet, and Extreme springs into action. He runs and bounces off the ropes on the side of the ring furthest from Jordan, and sprints across the ring.....] RP: ARGH!!! *CRASH!* [HARDCORE POP!] LVK: OH MY GOD!!! Extreme tried a running suicide dive over the top rope, but Jordan moved at the last minute and the champ collided heavily with the cage! RP: Ha ha! Now he knows how Bryce feels! Good job! LVK: And now Extreme is cut open as well! The blood is flowing freely in this match! RP: What, you didn't expect it to be? It's a friggin' Rage in the Cage match! [As Jordan and Extreme lie on one side of the ringside area, Hopper and Vanguard continue to brawl on the other. Both are bloody, especially Hopper, who has a mask of crimson. Hopper sends Vanguard crashing backfirst into the steel ringsteps......] *CLANG!!!* LVK: The way these wrestlers are going, there won't be anything left of them when the final bell rings! RP: Hardcore to the core baby!....er..or something. [Back across the other side, Jordan and Extreme, though Extreme looks ready to fall over at any moment. Jordan bodyslams him back to the floor, and then grabs hold of the side of the cage, and looks up.] LVK: What's Jordan doing now? I think he's going to climb the cage! RP: He'll be able to climb out and win, and all will be right in the world! Woohoo! LVK: Er, Rick? RP: Yeah? LVK: What about the roof? RP: Damn! [Jordan grabs hold of the wire meshing with both hands, and begins pulling himself upward, while digging his boots into the cage as well. Slowly he makes his way up, until he is a good 10 feet off the floor. With a glance downwards, he lets go.....] *KAH-THUD!!!!* [HARDCORE POP!!!!!] LVK: ELBOWDROP FROM THE SIDE OF THE CAGE ONTO EXTREME ON THE HARD FLOOR!!!! RP: THAT MUST HAVE BEEN DAMN NEAR A 10-FOOT DROP!!!! [With Jordan and Extreme both down again, the camera returns to Vanguard and Hopper. Both are bloody and beaten, as they duke it out. Vanguard lifts up Hopper and drapes him across his shoulder, before attempting to ram him headfirst into the cage. But Hopper jumps off the shoulder at the last minute, giving Vanguard a hefty push in the back in the process. Vanguard slams facefirst into the cage and falls to the floor.] LVK: Chris Hopper is currently the only of the four wrestlers still on his feet! What a battle this main event has been! RP: You spoke too soon Van Keel - Bryce is getting up! LVK: Indeed he is! [Jordan climbs up, looking bloody and tired, and begins to walk along the side of the ringside area. Meanwhile, Hopper drags Vanguard to his feet, but Vanguard punches him twice, and suplexes him to the floor. Jordan continues to walk, towards the door of the cage!] LVK: Is Jordan leaving? Can he be willing to walk away from his title aspirations? RP: No! Come back Bryce! Roll Extreme into the ring and pin him! LVK: It looks like to me like Jordan doesn't know *where* he is! He's opening the cage door.... [The fans give a confused pop as Jordan opens the door and steps through, as Extreme gets to his feet.] RP: BRYCE MADE IT OUT OF THE CAGE!!! HE WINS!!! LVK: Er, Rick, this isn't *that* kind of cage match. RP: It isn't? Damn! [Jordan staggers from the open door, his glazed eyes sweeping over the excited crowd and then coming to rest on the steel side of the cage. He stumbles forward towards it, and then cranes his head upwards, taking in the vertical extent of the steel monstrosity.] LVK: What is Bryce Jordan doing? RP: I don't know, but Extreme is going after him!! [Extreme jumps through the cage door and walks towards Jordan, who doesn't even see him coming. Jordan reaches up and grabs hold of the cage with both hands, and heaves himself upwards, beginning to climb the sheer side of it.] LVK: DEAR GOD!!! JORDAN IS CLIMBING THE CAGE!!! RP: IS HE FRIGGIN' CRAZY?!? [Jordan's upward progress is slow but steady, each heave bringing a grunt of effort with it. Below him, Extreme stands and looks up. He shakes his head in disbelief, and then begins climbing himself, bringing a HARDCORE POP!] LVK: AND NOW EXTREME IS CLIMBING UP AFTER HIM!!! RP: Van Keel, I have a funny feeling someone's leaving in a hearse tonight. [Up they climb, Jordan a couple of feet above Extreme. Somehow the camera angle changes to an aerial one from above the cage, showing Jordan scaling the steel, Extreme just below him, and a sea of humanity behind them.] LVK: Up, up, up they go..... RP: Where they fall...er...there'll be nothing but a bloodstain to show. [With one last effort-filled pull, Jordan hauls himself up over the edge, and onto the roof of the cage. He rolls over onto his back, gasping for breath, as the fans let off another big cheer. Back in the cage, Hopper and Vanguard are back in the ring. Hopper sends Vanguard into the ropes, and ducks under an attempted Vanguard lariat. Both men stop and turn around to face each other again....and Vanguard kicks Hopper swiftly in the gut, and then grabs hold of him.....] LVK: PILEDRIVER BY VANGUARD IN THE CAGE!!! RP: Who cares...EXTREME IS UP ON THE CAGE WITH JORDAN!!! [HUGE FACE POP as Extreme and Jordan climb to their feet, looking very unsteady on the steel cage beneath their feet. Jordan swings a sloppy punch, but Extreme easily blocks it, and answers back with a shot of his own. A second Extreme fist sends Jordan crashing backfirst to the steel mesh, and elicits another FACE POP!] LVK: The champion taking it to the young man who has been a thorn in his side since the very day that RCW opened its doors! RP: HOLY CRAP! Now Vanguard is climbing! LVK: DEAR GOD!!! [The camera changes to show Vanguard rapidly scaling the metal siding, showing none of the tardiness of Jordan or Extreme. Teeth clenched, a determined look on his face, Vanguard swallows up the cage's height with each grab-and-lift climbing movement.] RP: Damn! Now Bryce is one against two! LVK: And Vanguard is quickly making his way to the top....HE'S MADE IT!!! [Vanguard pulls himself up onto the top, and climbs to his feet, as Jordan and Extreme continue to go punch-for-punch towards the center of the cage. Vanguard slowly makes his way over, as Jordan knocks Extreme down with a front kick to the chest. The impact of Extreme's back hitting the cage top shakes the entire frame.] LVK: This is crazy...crazy! Three of the four men are on top of this huge Rage in the Cage structure! Can you imagine if SOMEONE GOT THROWN OFF?! RP: Me, I'd like to see Extreme go flying into the crowd. Hopefully a few of these St Louis punkheads'd be squashed! LVK: You're a twisted soul Rick. RP: Thank you! [Vanguard reaches the area of battle as Extreme gets back to his feet. The champ turns to see Vanguard approaching, and smiles towards Jordan, as if saying "now you're in for it". The fans cheer, but those cheers soon turn to boos as Vanguard lashes out with a punch....] LVK: OH!!!! VANGUARD HIT EXTREME!!!! THAT DIRTY LOW-DOWN SCUMBAG!!! HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HELPING EXTREME WIN....HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT A TITLE SHOT...HE JUST CARES ABOUT PUNISHING THE CHAMPION!!!! RP: And now Jordan and Vanguard are high-fiving! Brilliant!!! LVK: It seems that these two very-talented-but-devious superstars are working together! This is despicable! [Vanguard pulls Extreme to his feet and holds him from behind, as Jordan breaks out in a wide smile. He stalks closer to Extreme, and begins mouthing off at it. The fans boo like crazy as Jordan unloads an open-handed slap across Extreme's face, and then spits right in his face.] LVK: And now Bryce Jordan showing absolutely no respect for the National Champion! RP: Why should he? Bryce is far more talented that Extreme is, was or ever will be! LVK: OH MY GOD!! WHERE DID *HE* COME FROM?!? [Undetected by the cameras, which have been locked on the action atop the cage, Chris Hopper has scaled the side of the cage, and he pulls himself up onto the top, completing the four-way rendezvous in the air.] RP: HOPPER! LVK: THE KING OF COOL IS ON THE CAGE ROOF - ALL FOUR MEN ARE ON TOP!!!! RP: Damn Van Keel, you sound like you're commentating a gay porn flick. [Hopper carefully makes his way over to the action. Vanguard drops Extreme and meets Hopper with a haymaker punch, but Hopper ducks it and nails Vanguard with an uppercut. FACE POP! Within seconds Hopper is punishing Vanguard with punches, but Jordan cuts him short with a knee to the small of the back, dropping Hopper to his knees.] LVK: The tagteam concept has been thrown out the window, or rather...off the cage! Now we see Vanguard and Jordan working together, and Extreme and Hopper fending for themselves! RP: I don't think we'll be seeing Extreme and Hopper work together....*ever*. [Hopper climbs back to his feet, faced with both Jordan and Vanguard, who immediately start plowing into him with punches and kicks, sending "Too Cool" back to the metal surface. HEEL POP!] LVK: I still can't believe we're seeing Eric Vanguard and Bryce Jordan working together! They've shown nothing but animosity towards each other in the past! RP: I'm kinda wondering who's gonna get the pin. Is Vanguard gonna let Jordan win the title by pinning Extreme, or will Jordan let Vanguard pin Hopper, so that he gets the title shot tonight? Whose ego will win out? LVK: Well, they're not going to be able to pin anyone up there......EXTREME IS UP!!! [FACE POP! Extreme spins Vanguard around and nails him with a pair of hard right hand punches, which send the big former prison guard toppling onto his back. Jordan rushes at Extreme, but the champion moves out of the way, and gives him a kick in the back on the way past. Jordan stumbles towards the edge of the cage, and a female fan screams......] LVK: OH MY G- [But Jordan manages to stop himself short of going over the edge, a look of complete panic on his young face. He steadies himself and turns back around.....] RP: That was damn close! LVK: BUT EXTREME ISN'T FINISHED!!! [The champ fires a punch into Jordan's face, staggering him and forcing him to step backwards towards the edge. Another punch sends Jordan's arms flying into the air, as he teeters agonizingly close to a big fall. The fans scream and yell in anticipation, as Extreme winds up for one last punch......] RP: NO! [But Jordan evades the punch and ducks in behind Extreme. The champ turns around, and is immediately grabbed by Jordan......] LVK: BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX ON TOP OF THE CAGE!!! [The camera angle changes to one from within the cage, looking up through the roof, as we see Alex Extreme come crashing down on the chainlink roof backfirst. POP!] RP: And now Vanguard's grabbing Extreme.... LVK: Setting him up for.... RP: HOLY SHIZNIT! HE POWERBOMBED EXTREME!!! [Another "from beneath" shot shows Extreme crashing backfirst into the surface of the cage roof, as the fans let rip with another HARDCORE POP!] LVK: When this match started it was Extreme and Vanguard against Jordan and Hopper, but now it's Jordan and Vanguard against Extreme. Chris Hopper seems to have become merely a distraction for the twisted plans of Vanguard and Jordan! RP: Speaking of which....HOPPER IS UP! [HUGE FACE POP as Hopper runs over Jordan with a lariat, and then turns to Vanguard, blocking a Vanguard punch attempt and unloading a stinging right hand of his own. The blow staggers Vanguard, and Hopper follows up with a second.] LVK: DEAR GOD!!! ERIC VANGUARD AND CHRIS HOPPER ARE TRADING PUNCHES ON THE EDGE OF A 18-FOOT DROP!!! [The camera angle changes to one from above, showing Vanguard and Hopper trading blows, and the human sea of the crowd cheering, jumping and moving below. The angle makes the drop seem worse than it is, as if the two combatants are battling at the edge of a man-made mountain cliff.] LVK: I HAVE *NEVER* SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS!!!! [With each punch, Hopper and Vanguard rock back on their wobbly legs, looking ready to topple over the edge at any given moment. But somehow they manage to keep their balance. That's about to change though - Bryce Jordan crawls over to them, scampering in behind Hopper undetected. He reaches up and puts his right arm between Hopper's legs.....] LVK: OOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! RP: HOLY NUTCRACKER!!!! JORDAN WITH A LOW BLOW!!! [The low blow brings a look of shock and pain to Hopper's face, as he brings his legs together and clutches his hands to the affected region. He has no way to stop what is about to happen, as Vanguard rears back, and pushes forward with a kick to Hopper's chest.....] RP + LVK: ARRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [A female fan screams......] *KAAAAAAAAAA-RUNCH!!!!!!!!!!!!* [MONSTROUS HARDCORE POP!!!!!!] LVK: OH DEAR GOD NO!!!! CHRIS HOPPER FELL OFF THE CAGE, PLUMMETING 20 FEET AND CRASHING THROUGH THE TIMEKEEPER'S TABLE!!!! RP: HE'S DEAD!!!! HOPPER IS DEAD!!! HE *HAS* TO BE!!! LVK: I....[voice shaking]...I......oh my God... [Some fans are cheering, but most are in silent shock. Hopper lies amidst the debris which was once a wooden table, understandably not moving. His left leg sits up and over a jagged piece of the table, and another large shard of wood covers Hopper's head and chest region. Referee Gus Moxley begins frantically signalling towards the back, as three EMTs rush to the scene. Back on the roof of the cage, Vanguard looks down with a smile of pure evil satisfaction. The camera changes to show Rick and Larry, who both have concerned looks on their faces.] RP: I have *never* liked Hopper, but....well.....I'd hate to see him go out like this. LVK: The medical staff have made their way out, and let's just pray that Chris Hopper is alright. But after falling 20 feet through a wooden table.....I...just....I don't know.... [The camera changes back to one high up on the cage, as Vanguard turns back to Extreme, pulling him to his feet. Jordan, after glancing over the edge at the scene of commotion below with a little less zeal than Vanguard, walks over to be at Vanguard's side.] LVK: This match needs to be called off right now! RP: Whoa there Van Keel! Just because Hopper did his Humpty Dumpty impression doesn't mean we stop the match! We're about to crown a new champion! Who exactly I don't know though.... [As Vanguard and Jordan stand over Extreme, a thin white rope of some type drops down a few feet from them, dangling from above.] RP: What the hell? [In somewhat of a surreal scene, a figure slides down the rope on a harness, dropping to his feet on the chainlink cage roof. POP!] LVK: CHRIS GOTHAM!!! THE NUMBERS HAVE BEEN EVENED UP!!! RP: Doesn't he know those stunts are dangerous? And he's not even in this damn match! LVK: Indeed he isn't, but he doesn't seem to care!! [Gotham quickly undoes the rope from the harness he is wearing, and walks towards the group of three wrestlers. He reaches around his back, and pulls a large black object from his back pocket....] RP: What the hell is that? LVK: It looks like a weapon of some sort! [Seeing the weapon, Jordan and Vanguard back away from Extreme, allowing the champion to struggle to his feet. Gotham moves to the side of Extreme, staring down Vanguard and Jordan as the fans cheer like crazy. Far below, medics continue to work on Hopper, who is still not moving at all.] LVK: Now we have a stand-off between the pairings of Extreme and Gotham, and Vanguard and Jordan. Gotham has that weapon, and he..... *KAH-RACK!* LVK: ......OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Extreme doesn't even see it coming, as Gotham brings the weapon down on the back of the champ's head, knocking Extreme flat to the metal surface. A THUNDERING HEEL POP explodes from the crowd!] RP: GOTHAM TURNED ON EXTREME!! YEAH BABY!!!! LVK: First Vanguard turns against Extreme, which I guess is hardly surprising, and now Chris Gotham turns his back on his good friend, which is a bolt out of the blue! What more can happen to the beleaguered champion! [Gotham flashes a half-evil, half-content smile, as he high-fives Vanguard and Jordan, making the chorus of boos kick up a level of volume. Gotham hands the weapon to Vanguard and walks over to the side of the cage, and begins climbing down.] LVK: And now Gotham is leaving?! Vanguard has the weapon.... [The big former prison guard grabs it with both hands and pulls apart, opening up a large jaw-shaped piece on the end. He opens and closes it a few times.] LVK: .....WIRE CUTTERS!!! GOTHAM BROUGHT WIRE CUTTERS!!! RP: That *can't* be good! [Gotham makes it down to the floor, as Vanguard bends down, and aims the wire-cutters at the cage roof.] LVK: Indeed....and now VANGUARD IS CUTTING THE CAGE ROOF OPEN!!! RP: Why? They're already out! [Gotham walks into the cage and begins rummaging around under the ring. Finally he comes back out, pulling out a black duffel bag and then a wooden table. POP!] LVK: By the looks of it, Vanguard, Jordan and Gotham have this all planned out! RP: I don't know what they're doing, but when you involve wirecutters and a table, that can only mean one thing.....PAIN! [Gotham slides the table into the ring, and opens out the legs, standing it up in mid-ring. He then grabs the black duffel bag and makes his escape from the cage. He grabs the cage door and swings it shut, as Vanguard continues making easy work of the cage roof, having already cut a line about three feet long in it. Gotham reaches into the duffel bag.....] LVK: A PADLOCK? This is all starting to add up now! RP: He's locking the cage....but why? There's noone in it! LVK: I have a feeling there is going to be *veeerrry* soon! [Having finished locking the cage up tightly, Gotham turns around, just in time to see a figure sprinting down the aisle towards him....] LVK: BRETT YOUNG!!! HE HAS A SCORE TO SETTLE WITH GOTHAM AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE WANTS TO SETTLE IT RIGHT NOW!!! [Young begins pummelling Gotham with punches, knocking the "Original Bad Boy" back into the side of the cage. Suddenly the crowd gets noisy at something, and two more figures jump into shot.....] RP: THE LEADING MEN ARE HERE!!! HA HA! THE DEVIOUS PLAN CONTINUES TO UNFOLD!!! LVK: Shade and Valiant laying into Brett Young. Who the hell can save Alex Extreme now? RP: Nobody can Van Keel. This is brilliant! [HUGE FACE POP!] LVK: Nobody huh? What about JASON BLAKE?! Here comes the new Gateway Heavyweight champion!!! [Blake joins the fray, getting into a melee with Vic Valiant, as Young continues to battle Tripp Shade. But within seconds, more and more bodies are running into the battle. Tyrone Parker, Raya Oscura, Team Canada, Johnny Bonaducci, Johnny Axis - they all quickly join the fray. The crowd is understandably in a frenzy, seeing this mayhem unfold.] LVK: THE LOCKERROOM HAS DAMN NEAR EMPTIED!!! IT'S PANDEMONIUM AT RINGSIDE!!! RP: YEAH! THIS IS GREAT!! LVK: The ringside area now resembles a street riot, but LOOK ON THE ROOF!! VANGUARD AND JORDAN HAVE NEARLY FINISHED CUTTING A HOLE!!!! RP: A *DAMN BIG* HOLE!! [The camera goes back to the from-above aerial shot, showing Vanguard cutting the last part of a large rectangle hole - about five feet in length and a couple of feet wide. Jordan pulls away at the hole-inner, while every now and then giving the prone Extreme a kick.] LVK: This doesn't look good at all fans. Vanguard and Jordan have unveiled a plan of evil proportions, and right now they have the National Champion at their mercy! [With a final snip, the hole is completed. Jordan grabs the inner part and drops it into the ring, beside the table, which sits directly beneath the hole. Jordan and Vanguard nod at each other, and then pull Extreme to his feet. Jordan takes hold of Extreme by the hair and pulls him on his hands and knees to the edge of the hole....] LVK: Oh for the love of God! THEY WOULDN'T!!! NOT AFTER WHAT WE JUST SAW HAPPEN TO CHRIS HOPPER!!!! RP: You wanna bet? [Jordan pulls Extreme to his feet and look set to throw Extreme through the hole, to the ring below, but all of a sudden Extreme lashes out with a back-elbow, catching the "Trendy One" in the face, and breaking his hold on him. Vanguard rushes in, but Extreme ducks a swinging punch, and flattens him with an enzuigiri kick. FACE POP!] LVK: THE CHAMP ISN'T ABOUT TO GIVE UP JUST YET!!! LOOK AT HIM GO!!! [Extreme turns back to Jordan and slams a couple of punches into his face, staggering the Upstarts member. He then grabs Jordan by the head, and sets him into a dragon sleeper.....] LVK: EXCITING DEATH DROP!!! EXTREME NAILED IT ONTO THE CAGE ROOF!!! RP: NOOO!!!! [HUGE FACE POP as Extreme gets back to his feet, but the cheers fade out as Vanguard, who is back to his feet, catches the champ with a stiff kick to the gut. Extreme doubles over immediately, and Vanguard grabs him, wrenching him into a standing headscissors....] *KAAAAAAA-RUNCH-THUDDDD-SLAM!!!!* [DEAFENING HARDCORE POP!!!!!!] RP: HOLY GUACA-FRIGGIN-MOLE!!!!!!!!!! VANGUARD POWERBOMBED EXTREME *THROUGH* THE HOLE IN THE CAGE ROOF, DOWN THROUGH A TABLE IN THE RING!!!!!! LVK: INSANITY!!!! THIS WHOLE MATCH IS INSANITY!!!! RP: ERIC VANGUARD HAS ENDED THE CAREERS OF CHRIS HOPPER *AND* ALEX EXTREME!!!! THIS MAN IS A MOTHERN' MONSTER, AND I LOVE IT!!!! [The deafening crowd noise continues as the "from above" camera looks down through the hole in the cage at Extreme, who is a twisted and bloody heap amidst the wreckage of the table. Vanguard throws both arms into the air, soliciting a GIANT HEEL POP!] LVK: Eric Vanguard is out of control! This man should be arrested! RP: Screw that - Eric Vanguard for President! [Having soaked up the roaring disapproval of the fans, Vanguard drops down to his knees, and grabs the edge of the hole in the roof. In one motion he swings his weight forward, and dangles from the roof. He then drops to the mat, bending his knees to absorb the fall.] LVK: DEAR GOD!!! ERIC VANGUARD IS IN THE CAGE WITH ALEX EXTREME AND THE CAGE DOOR IS PADLOCKED!!! PARAMEDICS CAN'T EVEN HELP THE CHAMP RIGHT NOW!!! [Brett Young and Jason Blake are frantically trying to get into the cage, but to no avail. They are at the point where they are trying to rip the door from its hinges, but this is reality folks. Their endeavour fruitless, Blake and Young are once again pulled back into the melee of bodies at ringside, as the huge brawl continues.] LVK: This is a tragedy. Somebody get Extreme some medical help! RP: Who's going to save him Van Keel? Superman? Mighty Mo- [HUGE FACE POP!] LVK: HOW ABOUT *HIM*? [Through the mass of brawling bodies bursts Vlad Stukovski, with a hammer in his hands.] LVK: VLAD STUKOVSKI!!!! AND HE HAS ERIK JORGENSEN'S MJOLNIR HAMMER!!! RP: ARGH!! ANGRY GIANT RUSKI....WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER!!! [Stukovski beats his way through the brawl, and sizes up the padlocked door. Then in one motion he swings Mjolnir into the air, and brings it down onto the padlock.....] *CLANK!* [The padlock stands firm, but a second blow.....] *CLANK!* [...smashes it out of shape. A third.....] *CLANK!* [...finally breaks it! HUGE POP!] LVK: HE'S DONE IT!!! VLAD STUKOVSKI HAS BROKEN THROUGH THE PADLOCK!!! THE DOOR IS OPEN!!! RP: VANGUARD AND STUKOVSKI.....HOLD ONTO YOUR SEATS!!!! [Vanguard stops Stukovski with a punch to the face, but the blow hardly seems to even faze the big Russian. He throws the hammer aside, and begins trading thundering punches with Vanguard, sending the fans into a screaming frenzy. As they brawl towards one side of the ring, the camera swings up, showing Bryce Jordan back to his feet on the cage. He walks to the hole, and without hesitation, leaps....] [Fans scream....flashbulbs pop.....] *THUR-UD!* [THUNDERING POP!!!] LVK: OH......OH......OH MY *GOD*!!!!!! RP: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!! IS EVERYONE IN THIS MATCH OUT OF THEIR FRIGGIN' MINDS? LVK: BRYCE JORDAN JUST JUMPED *THROUGH* THE HOLE IN THE CAGE ROOF, SAILED 15 FEET THROUGH THE AIR AND LANDED ON ALEX EXTREME WITH THE ELBOWSMASH FROM HELL!!!! RP: IN-FRIGGIN'-CREDIBLE!!!!! [Jordan rolls off of Extreme, slumping onto his back, his eyes shut and his chest heaving with the effort of just breathing. Extreme lies similarly, but isn't moving at all. Vanguard and Stukovski continue to battle in the gap between the ring and the cage, while outside the cage the brawl continues. All around, the cheers and screams of the fans form a deafening wall of sound.] LVK: This match....well, I guess you can hardly call it a match anymore. Anarchy would be a better word for it. [With an almost instinct-like roll, Jordan slumps onto his stomach and drapes an arm across Extreme's chest. Referee Gus Moxley, who has entered the cage and is watching Vanguard and Stukovski go at it, turns and sees the cover. He slides into the ring.....] LVK: JORDAN HAS A COVER!!!! RP: IT'S OVER!!! NEW CHAMPION!!!! LVK: HERE'S THE COUNT.... ONE!! TWO!!! [THUNDEROUS FACE POP!] NO! NO!!! SOMEHOW EXTREME GOT HIS SHOULDER UP!!!! THE CHAMP KICKED OUT!!!! RP: How the hell? LVK: After being powerbombed from the roof of this cage through a table, and *then* having Bryce Jordan perform a flying elbow from the roof onto him, ALEX EXTREME IS STILL IN THIS MATCH!!! [A portion of the crowd begins screaming and cheering louder than the rest, and the camera pans to where the crowd of officials and EMTs are crowded around what's left of the timekeeper's table. Suddenly they part, and a bloody and clearly-groggy Chris Hopper staggers through.] RP: WHAT?!?! NO.....NO....IT'S NOT FRIGGIN' POSSIBLE!!!!! LVK: It may not be Rick, but it's happening in front of our very eyes! CHRIS HOPPER IS NOT ONLY CONSCIOUS, BUT WALKING TOWARDS THE CAGE DOOR!!! [Every step that Hopper takes has the appearance of being his last, as he stares blankly through a mask of blood, and his legs wobble impossibly. He stops and grabs hold of the side of the cage for balance. In the cage, Bryce Jordan is back to his feet. He stands over the fallen Extreme for a moment, and then slides out of the ring, and begins rummaging around beneath it.] LVK: What is Bryce Jordan doing now? RP: I guess he's looking for something. Like maybe.... [Jordan pops back up, and in his hand is...] RP: .....A CHAIR!!! LVK: DO I SEE WHAT I'M SEEING? NOW ALEX EXTREME IS GETTING UP!!!! FIRST HOPPER AND NOW EXTREME!!! WHAT SHEER DETERMINATION AND WILLPOWER WE ARE SEEING BY THESE TWO SUPERSTARS!!! RP: Extreme's not gonna be standing for long though, because Bryce is getting back into the ring....WITH THE CHAIR!!! [Jordan gets to his feet back in the ring, the chair in one hand, and he smiles as he sees Extreme get back to a vertical base. Extreme's head and face is a mask of blood, and several other patches of blood are visible on his battered body. His legs are wide apart, trying to keep him balanced, but the champion sways about as if ready to fall over from even a gentle gust of breeze. Jordan holds the chair in the air with one hand, as if it were a trophy, bringing a HEEL POP! He smiles as he walks forward, ready to inflict more punishment on the National Heavyweight Champion.....] LVK: This could be it fans. Bryce Jordan looks in an unstoppable position right now, and he looks set to become the next National champion. RP: Yay! LVK: He's got the ch- Wait a minute....WHO IS THAT?!? [Suddenly a figure jumps into the ring out of nowhere - a figure wearing black pants and a plain black mask. He runs at Jordan, who swings the chair into the air to ward off this unexpected interruption. But the masked man swiftly kicks him in the gut, making Jordan drop the chair.....] LVK: A MASKED MAN HAS SEEMINGLY COME TO EXTREME'S AID!!!! And now he throws Jordan from the ring!!! [CONFUSED POP! The masked man climbs through the ropes to go after Jordan, and they begin brawling in the gap between the cage and the ring, much like Stukovski and Vanguard are doing on the opposite side.] LVK: After being backstabbed by both Vanguard and Gotham, the cavalry has finally arrived for Alex Extreme! And in the form of one pissed-off Russian and a mystery masked man! RP: This has all gone wrong, very wrong! Bryce should be holding up the belt right now! LVK: Extreme is still on his feet, but only just....and HERE COMES CHRIS HOPPER!!!! [Hopper stumbled through the cage door and makes his way up the ring steps, a picture of bloody devastation. He stumbles through the ropes, clearly barely knowing where he is. Extreme, in a similar state of "auto-pilot", meets Hopper with a sloppy and badly-aimed punch, which barely grazes Hopper's chin. Hopper answers back with a sloppy punch of his own....] LVK: AND NOW HOPPER AND EXTREME ARE TRADING PUNCHES!!! BOTH MEN HAVE BEEN TO HELL AND BACK TONIGHT, BUT THEIR COMPETITIVE SPIRIT STILL BURNS STRONG!!!! RP: NO! PLEASE GOD, DON'T LET HOPPER WIN THE TITLE!!! [Hopper's punches, though poorly aimed and not packing much of an impact, are clearly having more effect than Extreme's, and soon Extreme is not even answering back, but just rocking back, looking ready to fall to the mat. It takes what seems an eternity for each of Hopper's punches to land.] LVK: And now Chris Hopper is blazing away on the champ with punches..... [Extreme swings a lazy haymaker at Hopper, but Hopper ducks under it. In one motion he reaches up and grabs Extreme's head....] LVK: ICEBREAKER!! HE'S GOING FOR THE ICE- [But before Hopper can nail his version of the Ace Crusher, Extreme nails him with a jab in the face, breaking the hold, and then grabs Hopper's head in a dragon sleeper set-up....] LVK: EDD!!!! EXTREME HIT THE EXCITING DEATH DROP!!!!!! RP: HOPPER'S OUT!!!! LVK: AND NOW EXTREME DRAPES AN ARM..... ONE!! TWO!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [ENORMOUS FACE POP!!!] LVK: HE DID IT!!! ALEX EXTREME RETAINS THE NATIONAL HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!!! [The scene inside the cage is one of devastation, as Hopper and Extreme are both flat out on their backs in the ring, which also features what remains of the table and a large piece of wire cage material. Between the cage and the ring lie Vanguard, Stukovski and Jordan, as the masked man seems to have made a quick getaway in all of the excitement. Outside of the cage isn't much better - bodies lie strewn on the floor, in the aisle and against the cage. Except for two - Brett Young and Jason Blake - who climb into the cage.] RP: THIS IS A TRAGEDY!!! A TRAGEDY!!! BRYCE JORDAN SHOULD BE NATIONAL CHAMPION RIGHT NOW AND HE WOULD BE IF IT WASN'T FOR THAT MASKED GUY AND THE FAT RUSSIAN PINKO!!! ARGH! LVK: You can complain all you want Rick, but Alex Extreme overcame incredible odds here tonight. He overcame a devious plot instigated by Jordan and Vanguard, he overcame the backstabbing of his supposed friend Chris Gotham, and he overcame being powerbombed FROM THE CAGE ROOF THROUGH A TABLE!!! Stukovski and the masked guy simply evened up the odds a little bit towards the end! [Blake and Young help Extreme to his feet, big grins on their faces. Stukovski also rolls into the ring, and joins in the celebration as Extreme is handed *his* National Heavyweight Championship belt. Through a mask of blood and glazed eyes, Extreme hoists the belt over his head, to a HUGE FACE POP!] LVK: "There he is! The man who tonight inside The Rage In The Cage silenced all the critics by overcoming every single obstacle that was thrown in his path. He is truly a champion, in every sense of the word, he is Mr Excitement Alex Extreme!!!!" [The camera turns to show Alex Extreme mounted on the shoulders of Blake and Young, as they make their way back through the curtain.] RP: "What a night we have seen! We've seen the crowning of a NEW RCW Gateway Champion, one of the damndest matches in RCW History in The Desert Hell Death Match!" LVK: "We've seen the entrance of TORA Wanizame, Johnny Bonnaducci and Tyrone Parker and the shocking turn of "Superstar" Sean Cage! But capping it all off, we've witnessed Alex Extreme RETAIN his RCW National Title in what will go down as one of the greatest nights in RCW! For Randy Blackstone, Lindsey Catalano, and Rick Perle, I'm Larry Va..." [Suddenly the voice of Larry is cut off by another familiar voice, as the camera spins around to show a battered and bloody "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard propping himself against the corner turnbuckles. His jet black hair is matted to his scalp, and his face shows the wounds of the war he just waged. Through the crimson mask, you see him crack a little smirk...] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Hold up! Hold up! We ain't going off the air just yet, because *I* have some business to attend to. That business is fulfilling a promise that I made to myself earlier tonight and to the entire world - but most importantly to your faithful President Jimmy Jimbo Catanzaro!" RP: "The pictures?!?" LVK: "It has to be!" [The former prison guard drops to his knees and slides his hand in between the ring apron and the ring itself, pulling out a manila envelope with the word [CONFIDENTIAL] emblazoned across the front in bold black lettering.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "Jim, I told you that if the last words we heard tonight weren't NEW RCW National Champion, Eric Vanguard - that your dirty little secret, and these dirty little pictures would be exposed to the world. I've always been an up front guy, and a man of my word, and as much as it pains me to do it...It's time to face the truth Jim!" LVK: "Man of his word my ass! He's just trying to get a rise out of the boss, just like he has since the day he first walked into RCW." [With the cocky grin still painting his face, Vanguard reaches inside the envelope. Suddenly his expression contorts to one of confusion as he peeks in the envelope - finding nothing. Suddenly the RiverTron kicks into life, as a camera opens on Jim Catanzaro sitting in his office - a manila envelope in his clutches.] Jim Catanzaro: "Hey there Eric! Sorry to disappoint you tonight, but it looks like for once Mr. Vanguard doesn't have the upper hand. (Holding up the envelope) Vlad's camera's finally paid off, as I managed to find out exactly where you were keeping the pictures, and with a little string pulling I managed to get them for myself. So if you'll excuse me, I have some business to attend to." [The camera follows Jim Catanzaro as he spins around in his desk, where a paper shredder sits over a trash can. With a smile of contentment on his face, he places the edge of the envelope into the shreader as it is sliced into hundreds of pieces. Suddenly the screen starts to fill with static.] Voice: "Testing...testing...one...two...Eric, can you hear us?!?" [Soon an image starts to fill the screen, of a long scraggly haired man - sitting behind a control panel of some sorts. He is wearing the traditional orange jumpsuit of The Cellblock, and has thick rimmed glasses resting on his nose.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "I hear ya loud and clear Hacker, and the picture isn't coming in all that bad either! I just hope that Jimmy, in his plush little office can hear me loud and clear as well." LVK: "What is Vanguard doing? Where is that reception coming from?" RP: "Looks like the video truck to me." "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "If you can hear me Jim, then you will clearly realize that I didn't get where I am today by not having a "back up plan" of sorts. Anything could have happened to those pictures - stolen, burned, water damage...Eric Vanguard doesn't take risks like THAT!" LVK: "He has more!" "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "But rather than explaining my thought process for getting these other photo's - I feel that it may be better to show the whole world, something that they SHOULD KNOW. Hit it!" [Suddenly the curtains part as Jim Catanzaro comes rushing through the curtain, in a sprint for the ring. As he comes flying down the aisle, the screen springs to life showing Jim Catanzaro in a black and white photo. He is sitting in his office chair with his hand behind his head, enjoying the services of a girl in a Catholic School's Girl Uniform. Luckily there is a censor bar covering the more intimate portions of the picture.] RP: "GO JIMMY!!!!" [Seeing the irate President charging the ring, Vanguard bails to the outside - trying to keep away from the boss.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "How do you like that Jimmy! Now the whole world knows what kind of sick and twisted soul you really are! Sure we all have fantasies about nurses, female cops, and even Catholic School Girls - but NOBODY in their right mind would copulate with a 15 YEAR OLD CATHOLIC SCHOOL GIR-" [The words of Eric Vanguard are suddenly cut off as a steaming Jim Catanzaro dives through the ropes, catching the former prison guard with a right cross, knocking him to the floor. Almost instantly the fans in The Savvis Center take to their feet in shock as Catanzaro straddles the chest of Vanguard and begins to unload with rights and lefts.] LVK: "LOOK AT CATANZARO GO!!! GET HIM JIM!!!" RP: "Get him?!? You're actually standing behind a pedophile!" LVK: "Those photo's are obviously doctored!" RP: "Well the police seem to have a different view as here they come!" [The curtain at the end of the aisle suddenly parts and some of St. Louis' Finest come charging down the aisle. Two of the officers grab the arms of Jim Catanzaro, prying him off the prone Vanguard. As they start to drag him away you can hear Vanguard mumble.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "...pervert..." [No sooner are the words out of his mouth, then Jim Catanzaro nails one of the officers with a short knee to the stomach, and shoves the other one into the guardrail. In no time at all, Catanzaro is back on top of Vanguard, clobbering him with more crossface shots.] LVK: "Catanzaro is out to crush Vanguard for this defamation of character - but I don't think he should have done that to the two police officers. But there are more where they came from!" RP: "Now you're coming around! Attacking an officer of the law?!? DISGUSTING!" [Quickly another police officer grabs Catanzaro inn a restraint hold of sorts as Vanguard tries to roll over onto his stomach.] "Excessive Force" Eric Vanguard: "...friggin pedophi..." ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ [Before Vanguard can finish his words, Jim Catanzaro catches him in lower back with a regulation police tazer, brining him to his knees. In a heartbeat, he is grabbed by the police and dragged off an agonizing Vanguard.] Jim Catanzaro: (Screaming) "WHO'S BOWING DOWN NOW ERIC! WHO'S BOWING DOWN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!" [The image fades as Jim Catanzaro is thrown against the ring apron, his arms behind his back in handcuffs.] Officer: "You have the right to remain silent..." LVK: DEAR GOD!!! WHAT IS HAPPENING?! [Fade to credits] (c) RCW Productions, 2001.