WHO COULD FORGET LOVEABLE 80 YEAR OLD CUBAN PITCHER ROLANDO ARROJO? I KNOW I CAN'T
ALLAN "LEFTY" EMBREE
NUF SAID
PEDRO "WHOOP-LA" MARTINEZ:
WILL "WHOOP-LA" WHITE THREW 75 COMPLETE GAMES IN 75 STARTS 1879. HE WENT 43-31. HE HAD 394 COMPLETE GAMES IN 401 STARTS. PEDRO SEEMS LIKE A "WHOOP-LA" DESPITE A NOTICEABLE DIFFERENCE IN COMPLETE GAMES
MIKE "NOT SO TIMID" TIMLIN:
FORMERLY TIMID TIMLIN, MIKE PROVED HIMSELF TO BE NOT SO TIMID IN THE PLAYOFFS
JASON "THE COUNT" VARITEK:
THIS GUY JUST LOOKS LIKE A COUNT. HE NEEDS A CAPE AND SOME DRACULA FANGS. HE'D BE THE BEST VAMPIRE.
KEVIN "MOOSE" MILLARTHRA
THE MOOSE IS ROB MAHER'S, THE MILLARTHRA IS COURTESY OF OBEYPEDRO.COM
IGNOMAR GARCIAPARRA
NOMAR'S GREAT, BUT HE IGNORED ME. IT WAS DURING BATTING PRACTICE AND SOMEONE WAS RUNNING UP THE STEPS OF THE DUGOUT RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I COULD TELL IT WAS NOMAR CUZ HE TAKES THE STEPS ONE STEP AT A TIME. SO I YELLED, NOT EVEN A WAVE. SHIT, JETER CLAPPED WITH ME WHEN I DID A "NOMAR'S BETTER" CHANT ONE TIME. AT THE VERY LEAST, NOMAR COULD HAVE WAVED OR SOMETHING.
"BIG" BILL MUELLER:
BILL ISN'T THAT BIG, BUT BIG BILL SOUNDS A SHITLOAD BETTER THAN BIG DAVID OR BIG JEREMEY.
DAVID "CRUSHER" ORTIZ:
AFTER YELLING AT NOMAR, I YELLED AT DAVID. HE ACKNOWLEDGED ME. I TOLD HIM TO CRUSH THE YANKS. HE SMILED AND SAID "OOOOH YEAH."
JOHNNY "THE EVANGALIST" or "THE PARSON" DAMON:
BILL "THE EVANGALIST" or "THE PARSON" SUNDAY STOLE 84 BASES IN 1890 WITHOUT GETTING CAUGHT ONCE. IT WAS THE FIRST YEAR THAT CAUGHT-STEALING WAS KEPT AS A STAT. JOHNNY IS FAST TOO, AND HAS ONLY GOTTEN CAUGHT TWICE THIS YEAR.
"GET YOUR" TROT "HERE" NIXON:
THIS IS A REZ ORIGINAL. ONE SUNNY DAY IN THE FENWAY BLEACHERS, TROT NIXON COMES UP TO BAT. SIMULTANEOUSLY, AN ARAMARK VENDOR IS SELLING ICE CREAM/SPORTSBARS. I PUT 2 AND 2 TOGETHER AND CAME UP WITH THE NICKNAME.
DOUG "THE GRAND BARON" MIRABELLI
ME AND PEARCE COLLABORATED. TEK IS THE COUNT AND MIRABELLI HIT A GRAND SLAM ONE TIME
MANNY "THE CLOWN" or "LUNCHBOX" RAMIREZ
MANNY HAD THE CLOWN HAIR LAST YEAR AND WHEN HE RAN INTO THE WALL IN PHILLY, HE LOOKED LIKE A CLOWN. "LUNCHBOX" IS A SUBMISSION BY ARI. IT FITS.
RAMIRO "ICE CREAM" MENDOZA
AFTER THE 5TH INNING, THIS GUY MELTS LIKE A SUNDAE
GABE "SWEAT HOG" or "WALDO" or G-UNIT KAPLER
THE TEACHER ON "WELCOME BACK, KOTTER" WAS NAMED GABE KOTTER AND WAS PLAYED BY THE ACTOR GABE KAPLAN. THE "WALDO" IS BECAUSE GRADY LITTLE COULDN'T SEEM TO FIND HIM WHEN NIXON COMES UP VS. LEFTIES. G-UNIT IS OBVIOUS
I STILL NEED NICKNAMES FOR KEITH FOULKE, BH KIM, D-LOWE, ANASTACIO MARTINEZ, CURT SCHILLING, SCOTT WILLIAMSON, MARK BELLHORN, POKEY REESE, AND KEVIN YOUKILIS