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Title: Handle With Care
Author: Lizzie
E-Mail: [email protected]
Rating: R
Content: Language, m/m sex, dubious consent...
Disclaimer: Don't own them, and unless I suddenly become Vince McMahon, I never will. Not saying this happened in any way, shape or form.
Distribution: I have a very simple philosophy - want, take, have. Just let me know where it is.
Summary: Steve Austin - Handle With Care.
Notes: Response to Merc�s challenge for a fic explaining why Austin�s been saying �don�t touch me� so often. I�ve never written Austin before. This seems sooooo odd to me� Don�t blame me for it - I seem to have been listening to excessive amounts of sappy Backstreet Boys love songs and finding new muses are popping up all over� argh!!
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Handle With Care
by Lizzie
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�Don�t touch me�.
RVD smirks and shrugs, shoulderin� his belt and lookin� at me like maybe he�s gonna touch me again but he just decides he don�t need a pissed off rattlesnake to contend with and tells me his name instead.
�Don�t touch me�.
Booker glares at me and his nostril flare like he�s a fuckin� horse and I almost flinch but I don�t. I just stare him out �til he shakes his head and walks away.
�Don�t touch me�.
Shane rolls his eyes and looks over at Stephanie - I can tell they think I�m losin� it.
And y�know what? I think maybe I am. I must be. I mean, who cares if a co-worker touches �em? I shouldn�t. But it gets to me. I don�t like it. Maybe if I wasn�t Stone Cold Steve Austin and I couldn�t get away with bein� so damn rude to everyone all the damn time I�d put up with it and I�d get used to it again. Cuz I know once it didn�t bother me half as much when people touched me.
And y�know what makes it worse? This is all my fault.
�Don�t touch me�.
Tazz shoves me hard in the chest and the back of my head hits the wall as he walks away from me. I think maybe I�ll haveta jump him later, kick his ass a little. I need a few drinks first.
�Don�t you fucking touch me�.
Vince smiles that sardonic smile o� his and for a second I can�t move. I wanna, but I can�t. I just stare at him and he smiles some more, crosses his arms over his chest, leans against the wall. Then he reaches out and puts a hand on my shoulder. This time I do flinch, bad, and he just smiles even brighter.
�Good to see you, Steve�, he says. I shudder. I didn�t need to hear him speak. I didn�t wanna hear his voice. I just feel sick. I can�t look up and meet his eyes cuz I know the look he�s givin� me and I don�t wanna see it.
�Don�t touch me�, I say, shrug off his hand.
�You know you want me to�.
I squeeze my eyes shut, feel his hand on my arm. I bite my lip, rub at my beard with one hand. Then I look up. Right into his eyes.
�Don�t touch me�, I say, and this time I say it like I mean it. I say it with that look on my face, the one that makes my bosses think I�ve lost my mind, glarin� out at him with that crazy-ass smile on my face. When I swat his hand away this time he doesn�t try to put it back. So I look at him a second longer, then I turn and I walk away.
�Don�t touch me�.
Billy Kidman jumps back about a foot and looks all apologetic like. He apologises like he thinks I might beat the living hell outta him and backs away.
�Don�t touch me�.
�But Steve��
�But nothin�. Don�t touch me. Just� just get out. All o� ya. Get out! GET THE FUCK OUT!�
Debra nods to the rest of the Alliance and they clear outta here like I�d just pulled a gun. Don�t think many of �em would be surprised if I did. I just wanna be alone.
All this started a couple of weeks back. Before then I was fine. Hell, who am I kiddin�? It�s been this way since after Wrestlemania and I fuckin� know it, I jus� never said nothin� before. I�ve been feelin� like shit since then and there ain�t nothin� I can do about it. Cuz all I can see when I close my eyes is Vince McMahon�s face, that grin, his eyes, and I don�t wanna see it. I don�t wanna live with it.
All I can hear is his voice. Sometimes when there�s no one around it�s almost like he�s right there in the room or like I�m back there hearin� it for real. I just wanna cry. But I don�t cuz I�m Stone Cold Steve Austin and I don�t cry. Not for him and not for anyone.
�You like that, don�t you. You like my cock in you, don�t you, bitch. Feels good, huh?�
I feel sick. Cuz all I did was whimper and take it. I had to.
�Do you like that, bitch? Do you like me fucking you? Like the bitch you are. Such a pretty little bitch, Austin. Do you want me to fuck you harder?�
I drop my head into my hands, rub my eyes, feel the sting cuz I know there are tears comin� no matter what I do and don�t do. I never wanted it. I never wanted him. Sometimes it�s almost like I can still feel him, in me. I can�t get rid of him.
�Do you like it like this? Does it turn you on? Does it make you hard, Steve? Do you like it when I bend you over my desk, Steve? Do you like it when I fuck you while you�re wearing that belt?�
Oh God. He�s here. He�s touchin� me. He back and I don�t want this and I�m so scared� but I look up and it�s not him. Oh God, it�s not him.
�Don�t touch me, Kurt�.
But he doesn�t stop. His hand�s on my shoulder, his fingers brushin� over the bunched-up muscles, makin� me shiver.
�You�re so tense�� he says. �Hey, hey, what�s wrong?�
Christ, I�m cryin�. Blubbin� like a little girl. What the fuck did I do to deserve this? Cryin� in front of Kurt. But I can�t help it.
�I did it for the belt�, I murmur. He frowns.
�Did what?�
�Vince. Vince. I did Vince. For the belt�.
He nods and smiles. He�s fuckin� smilin�!
�I know�, he says.
�I sold out. And I jumped ship when I couldn�t live with myself anymore�.
�I know, Steve�.
�You do?�
�Yeah, I know�.
And he hugs me. Just kneels down in front of me and puts his arms around me, nestles his mouth into the crook of my neck and holds me. It�s almost too much.
�Don�t touch me�, I whisper.
�It�s okay, really. It�s okay�.
�Please don�t touch me�.
�I�m not gonna hurt you. I just wanna hold you. I�m not gonna hurt you. Ever�.
So I let him hold me. I let him kneel there with his arms around me, and I put mine around him, feel his skin and the muscles in his back, under the satiny Spandex. I run a hand over his hair and I think maybe it�s gonna be okay this time. I hope so. Cuz he�s not Vince. He says he�s not gonna hurt me like that.
I feel his heartbeat and it�s so damn good to be there in his warm arms that it doesn�t matter I�ve always hated this guy. And it feels almost good enough to make me forget that even if I love him - and I do, I can�t deny it - he�s gonna betray me.
Betray me and go play Vince McMahon�s bitch, Kurt. You won�t like it. I�ve been there. He�ll use you and make you feel like you�re worthless. But I�m not worthless. I�m the World Wrestling Federation Champion. I�m Stone Cold Steve Austin. I�ll go on and I�ll kick your ass just like I always have.
But right now all I want is you here with me. The guy I am underneath it all, the one who don�t know if he can keep it together - he wants you here. You wouldn�t think it, would ya - Steve Austin, crazy , tough SOB, all he wants is a little love but you gotta handle with care. �Cept you know, don�t ya. You�re gonna hurt me regardless and there ain�t a damn thing I can do about it. Then you�ll never touch me again.
And you know, sittin� here with your lips against my neck, I wish you�d never touched me.
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End
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