"Make yourself hefker like a midbar to receive the Torah" (quoted by Rabbeinu Bachyei in his commentary on Bemidbar 1,1).) A midbar has little of its own. It faces, without obstruction, towards the Heavenly face. A midbar has a perpetual openness. It is not self-satisfied. It is like a field that calls out to be nourished by rain, grateful for every drop as if its whole existence were changed by it. Having no distractions, it is filled with attention and longing. It has at the same time a dignity that comes from honesty and loyalty. It has about it a quietness of knowing what it is and why it is.
Why did Hashem command Moshe to take a count of B'nei Israel before beginning the journeys of Sinai? Because the wilderness of Sinai is a place of spiritual battle. It's a place of the four klipot: snake, scorpion, thirst, and rock. In order to surmount these, a person needs to value himself to the utmost, just like a person who goes out to war needs to be in touch with all of his powers. This is why Israel was counted, each person standing out in his individuality. And while ego, when it becomes an end in itself, is the source for all of our bad character traits, its powers are the greatest gift when turned to the service of Hashem. (See Shem MiShmuel, Bemidbar, daf vav)
The aligning of B'nei Israel by the degalim advices us how to persevere in the highest way for the duration of the spiritual battle. Degal means connection as it is used in Shir HaShirim, Degal ailay ahava. So in Bemidbar it means to stay connected to Hashem's ahavah rabbah. His great desire for our teshuvah. Like the flags on the battlefield telling the troops where their home base is, so in the spiritual struggle we must remind ourselves to return to this foundation of Hashem's love.
Bemidbar
Reb Shlomo Minyan HarNof
(R. Raphael, email: [email protected])
For Our Fathers
"Gd spoke to Moshe in the wilderness of Sinai, in the Communion Tent�saying, Count the individuals of all the congregation of B'nei Yisrael according to their families and the house of their fathers" (Bemidbar 1:1-2) At the time when Hashem's holy presence first rested on the completed Mishkan, all of Klal Yisrael gathered together. We were counted by families, aligned with the memory of our fathers who spent their lives in exile in Mitzrayim. And this gathering around the Mishkan was an awesome fixing for all of the 600,000 root souls of Yisrael because it represents reaching a level of holiness that was not possible in the darkness of Egypt. Our ancestors were not able to achieve this and they left much to their children that was unrepaired. So now that we are gathered together in holiness, be counted for the sake of your fathers who didn't have this opportunity. As the pasuk says, "Count the number of B'nei Yisrael according to their 'gulgalotam'" (lit. a head count, but also referring to gilgulim or reincarnation of souls). Because the family carries on the work of fixing its root soul and the souls of its ancestors through the generations.
And a person has to know that he is both an individual and a continuation from the past, and he has to be able to turn now towards the future, now towards the past. Because he does not just make himself. He also holds within himself something that is given, and he needs to respond both to the call of what is oldest within him and what has not yet come into the world. He has to try to complete that which he has received from his ancestors in an incomplete way. And even though this is an impossible task for one person, if he will join himself to the congregation of Yisrael through Torah and mitzvot, he will be protected from those things that were left broken or impure. When he sets aside his aloneness he is purified by the gathering of all the souls of the nation, and this in itself is a great fixing.
Because there is sometimes a feeling that fathers didn't do enough. That they didn't succeed in making the best choices because they shied away from choices that were somehow too difficult. And we can come to see our fathers in exile as the cause of that which is broken and difficult in our lives now. Feeling that our fathers caused their problems because of fear or negligence as opposed to seeing them as having struggles like we have struggles. And this happens because we look at our fathers in terms of what we want to receive and we forget that they also had difficult circumstances in their lives. And these difficulties are symbolized by the depth of the exile of Mitzrayim.
Mitzrayim was a particular time in Jewish history, a particular phase. But now we are standing around the Mishkan, which is our good fortune, our privilege. Rather than looking at what the fathers lacked in Mitzrayim as the final way to see them, we can bring them into our present, let them stand with us around the Mishkan. And the fathers are here with us in a way.
They want to be here because this moment is as much their hope as ours, and their being in Mitzrayim was the circumstances of their lives and the bridge that got us to where we are. And we need to see the goodness of our own experience. We don't have to go back to Mitzrayim. We were there already. Enough! But if we see our present in relation to the past only as an escape, then we are living in isolation without our extended family. Arriving to the present means bringing along the household, not leaving the ancestors behind.
So now we want to invite them to join us. They are here already but now we want to welcome them, to include them in where we are. To bring together the tragic depths of Mitzrayim and the glowing uniqueness of the present. And the more we can invite in those who were in Mitzrayim the more we realize that we are not so different. And the more we realize how we are a continuation the more we truly feel the special quality of where we are standing now, which is both desert and Mishkan, both tragic and glowing.
And where we are now is different. It is unique. Make no mistake. But not in the sense of the past being irrelevant, but rather that the past is being renewed. And this is the difference between modernity which sees no value in the past and paves over it as if it wasn't there and a cyclical present that is ancient and new - like the traditional text renewed through the ecstatic teaching of the chassidim. Because it doesn't have to be that in order to live in the present I must obliterate the past. We have to know how to invite in the ancestors. Learning from their experience of coming from Mitzrayim to the holiness of the Mishkan. This is a great tikkun for all of us. (Adapted from the Meor V'Shemesh on the parashah.)
The Holiness Of Youth Is Loud -
A Softer Service Comes Later
"Hashem spoke (V'yedaber) to Moshe in the wilderness of Sinai in the Tent of Meeting on the first of the second month in the second year from their exodus from the land of Mitzrayim, saying (l'emor)�" (Bemidbar 1:1). Why are there two different expressions of speaking in the pasuk? And what is the significance of the dates that are given here?
The Meor V'Shemesh says that "dibur" represents a public announcement or proclamation made with a loud voice; "amirah" signifies a hushed and quiet communication. The aspect of "dibur" is represented in the giving of the first tablets. These were presented in the openness of the midbar at Sinai where everyone around could see and hear and this corresponds to the first speaking in the pasuk. The quietness of "amirah" that comes at the end of the pasuk refers to the privacy of the Mishkan, at it says, "Hashem spoke to Moshe in the Tent of Meeting."
And the explanation is that everything goes through different spiritual stages. The stage of youth begins with an initial smallness of lack of experience and overwhelming powers till one comes to the maturity of youth. Later one enters the second half of life where once again he is limited and constricted. But this time we are burdened by our own experience and we have to struggle within ourselves to find our service to Hashem. And this is our ripening into the maturity of the second stage.
Thus, in his youth, a person is called a "wild city," but as his mind matures and he gains recognition of the Creator he begins to serve Hashem and this is called the maturity of his first level of development. In this stage he needs to serve Hashem with all his might and power whether in Torah, tefillah or his service in mitzvot. And he needs to express his holiness loudly because of the difficulty of coming at such an early age to a true fear and love of Hashem. And this is called the primary stage of greatness.
But then he comes to the second cycle of life when he is once again small. And here a man falls from what he had achieved and he needs to strenthen himself again. He needs to gain an understanding and sensitivity to the cunning of his own inclinations and through that awareness to return to serving Hashem. And through this he will come to the fullness of the second half. And when he achieves this he will no longer need great toil and effort in holiness, but rather he'll able to reach high spiritual levels in quietness and deep thought, whether it be in Torah or tefillah. And everyone is capable of coming to a great fear and awe of Hashem which isn't necessarily apparent to others, and this is a very great spiritual level.
And this is hinted at in the pasuk, "And Hashem spoke to Moshe in the wilderness of Sinai." Midbar Sinai represents the beginning stage when there are announcements and public declarations, like a person who needs to raise his voice to reach a holy service to Hashem because his initial smallness is a great burden to him. And he needs to forget his self-consciousness, leaving behind his egocentric interest in himself and break through to serve Hashem. And this is necessary so that he can give all of himself in a public display of devotion. But afterwards the pasuk refers to speaking in the Tent of Meeting in the second month and this refers to the the second stage when a person has found the holiness of his maturity, and in this second stage of greatness his completeness comes in speaking softly from the depths of wisdom. (Meor V'Shemesh on the parashah.)
Mitzvot
No commandments from this parashah are listed in Sefer HaChinuch.
At A Glance