Insertion 
 
Part 58 
 
Remembering the life I never had. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
Yohiko Hibiki looked around her room as if she'd never seen it before, 
mostly because she hadn't. 
 
"Whoa. Weird," said Carrot as they stood in the doorway and surveyed the 
immediate area. There was a well-made bed, a dresser, a closet, and a 
desk with a vanity mirror on it. Various makeup and pictures cluttered 
the desk, and there wasn't much personality to the place. "It's a chicks 
room." 
 
"What did you expect?" snorted Xianfu. 
 
"I'm not sure what the hell I was expecting," replied Carrot calmly. 
 
"Well, let's see what we can find," said Dan as they began to move 
about.  
 
"Pictures first," said Carrot as he walked over to the desk and sat 
down. They lifted the photos they had set up around the desk. 
 
Most of them were of herself and Usagi. There was a man with them in 
some of the more recent ones. He was mostly in the background though. 
"Wonder who that is?" asked Ranma. 
 
"A boyfriend maybe?" said Xianfu curiously as she looked at him. 
 
"Us, I hope not," said Carrot. 
 
"Did you just say what I think you said?" asked Dan. 
 
"Never mind that," said Carrot. "Oh great. I think this loser was our 
husband." 
 
"Hey. I know him!" said Ranma. 
 
"Morisato," said Carrot grimly. "We were married to Keiichi." 
 
"Gross!" exclaimed Dan. 
 
"What happened to him though? Are the Goddesses around?" asked Dan. 
 
"I don't think so," said Carrot. "In fact, I'm not sure why, but I'm 
pretty sure." 
 
"Well, we do work in mysterious ways," said Pissant cheerfully. 
 
"Yeah. Mysterious ways to piss us off," commented Dan bitterly. 
 
"We can't really blame us, we'd do the same thing in our position," said 
Carrot. 
 
"Ahem, anyway..." grumbled Xianfu. "We should find out about this young 
man." 
 
"He doesn't look that old to me," said Carrot. "Maybe mid-twenties." 
 
"Well, we do look good enough to net ourselves a younger man," said 
Xianfu. 
 
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," said Carrot. 
 
"Hey. Is that a diary?" asked Ranma as he pointed at a locked book on 
the corner of the desk. 
 
"Very useful," said Carrot as he picked it up and ripped the lock away 
calmly. The cover tore, but he doubted if they were going to be using it 
again. 
 
"Let's see..." said Xianfu as she flipped through the pages. "Here it 
is. 'I lost him, my god I lost him. Keiichi died today, a silly accident 
took the love of my life away. Usagi is devastated, I can't bring myself 
to tell her that her daddy isn't coming home. I can't even tell myself it 
seems. I told him, but he didn't listen. Don't moon the cheetahs honey, 
they look fast..." 
 
"What's the date?" asked Carrot. 
 
"Seven years ago," said Xianfu. 
 
"What a sap we were. There's some really bad poetry in here about lost 
love and all that," said Dan irritably. 
 
"Well, we were an English teacher..." pointed out Pissant.  
 
Carrot flipped through the book and read a few lines here and there. 
"Seems we never did recover. Most of this is whining about how much our 
life is empty and sucks. Contemplation of suicide, Usagi being around put 
a stop to that pretty quick...umm...guilt for having her be our mother, 
and not the other way around..." 
 
"Oh, that's nice," snorted Xianfu. "What kind of loser were we?" 
 
"The kind of loser who has an excuse for not doing much over the past 
few years," said Carrot calmly. "It's actually the perfect disguise for 
us." 
 
"I see," said Dan with a small frown on his face. They were still 
flipping through the book. "Seems that guy in the picture is our 
neighbor. He's been around a lot over the past two years, since we moved 
here. His name is...oh Us no!" 
 
"Ha! You're doing it too!" said Carrot. He then realized what the man 
was looking at. "Damn Us! Yusaku Godai!? We've got a really sick sense of 
humor!" 
 
"Makes you wonder who else might be lurking in these halls," said Dan. 
"It wouldn't surprise me if the whole lot of them is around." 
 
"We aren't the apartment manager are we?" said Carrot hopefully. 
 
"I don't think so. Why?" asked Xianfu. 
 
"Good. It's hard to explain. The easiest explanation is that it's 
another of those comics we read before we joined with Ranma." 
 
"Oh," said Ranma, Pissant, and Xianfu in unison. 
 
"Where to next?" asked Pissant. 
 
"The closet," said Carrot. "That would be the next place I'd keep 
important records myself." 
 
Dan stood them up and walked over to the door. They opened it and stared 
at a pile of photo albums that went up to their waist. There was a wall 
of videotapes with various dates on them as well. "Well, we're definitely 
Japanese," commented Carrot. 
 
"What the heck is that supposed to mean?" snapped Ranma. 
 
"I can't think of any other culture that takes this many pictures. 
Fortunately, that works to our advantage," said Dan as he picked up a few 
of the books. 
 
"Did we record that kids whole life?" asked Carrot as he peered at the 
videos. 
 
"Probably," said Xianfu as she lifted one of them up and flipped it 
over. "We should watch these. The photo albums should help us fill things 
in." 
 
"Some of these are dated more than fourteen years ago. They go back as 
much as twenty years," said Carrot. 
 
"Great," said Dan. "The more we know, the better." 
 
"Is this bothering anyone else?" asked Pissant nervously. 
 
"Yeah. I know what you mean. I halfway expect us to come in and ask what 
we're doing in our room," agreed Carrot. 
 
"It's like we're snooping around through someone else's stuff," said 
Xianfu uncomfortably. 
 
"Well it isn't someone else's stuff," snorted Dan. "It's our stuff." 
 
"This is really strange. I know she never existed before we came along, 
but I feel like we're stealing someone's life. I'm actually feeling 
guilty," said Xianfu as she clutched herself for a moment and shuddered. 
 
"Strange isn't it?" asked Carrot in amusement.  
 
"You actually seem to be enjoying this," said Pissant. 
 
"Well, I suppose I am," replied Carrot. "Hey. What's this blank one on 
the bottom?" He took it out of the stack carefully and flipped it over a 
few times. 
 
"I dunno," said Dan. "All the other ones are labeled." 
 
"Is Usagi back yet?" asked Pissant. 
 
"No. Let's check it out," said Carrot cheerfully. 
 
+++++++++++ 
 
They sat down in front of the TV and put the tape into the VCR. After 
starting it, they sat back and relaxed a bit. 
 
After a minute they all paused and sucked in a quick breath. 
 
"Is this what I think it is?" asked Ranma a little sickly. 
 
"Oh Us NO!" said Dan in horror. 
 
"Wow," said Xianfu in a sort of awe. "We can put all that in our..." 
 
"I'm gonna be sick..." whined Pissant. 
 
"We were married you know," said Xianfu irritably. "Don't be such 
babies." 
 
"Turn it off!" cried Carrot as he took the video out and tossed it away 
as if it was on fire. "Note. Never ever watch that again!" 
 
"Agreed!" said all the other males. 
 
"Hey! Wait a minute! I'm not gay, where the hell does that leave me?" 
cried Xianfu. 
 
"Outvoted," said Carrot flatly. 
 
+++++++++ 
 
Usagi opened the door to the apartment and smiled as she set the bag of 
groceries on the counter. Her smile faded when she saw the wine bottle 
sitting on the counter. "Oh man. Not again." 
 
Sure enough, her mother was sitting in the living room with stacks of 
old home movies again, a wine glass in her hand, and a smile on her face. 
The girl paused suddenly and actually did a double take. "A smile?" 
 
"Do you remember this?" she said as she turned and pointed at the 
screen. It was a video of her family when her father was still alive at a 
small amusement park. 
 
"Yes..." she said in confusion. "Mom...are you all right?" 
 
"I'm fine dear," said the woman almost cheerfully as she watched the 
screen. 
 
"Are you sure?" Usagi sighed, it was an old conversation. She knew her 
mother's reply by heart. 
 
"I think, things are going to change around here, Usa-chan." 
 
It was yet another surprise. "Wha?" 
 
"Come sit with me," said the woman as she held her arm out to her 
daughter. "Tell me what you remember." 
 
"Mom. I'm not sure if I should..." said the girl uncomfortably. 
 
"Don't worry," said the woman with her cheerful smile widening suddenly. 
 
Usagi was almost in tears. She'd not seen her mother smile that way 
since her father was still around. She rushed over and grabbed the woman 
around the neck. 
 
"Oof! You're stronger than I thought you'd be," said the woman 
cheerfully. "That's good." 
 
Usagi blinked in confusion. "Are you sure you're all right." 
 
"I don't think I've felt this good in a long time. The fun is just 
starting." 
 
Usagi was confused, but seemed to accept this as she lay her head 
against her mother's chest. "I remember that." It was the part when they 
were in a petting zoo within the park. A young Usagi was feeding the 
goats, and they had surrounded her. She was squealing with glee and 
running away from them. They chased her down and continued to attack the 
food she had gripped in her hands. 
 
Usagi looked up at her mother's face and blinked. She was sipping at the 
glass of wine in her hand lazily and seemed to be enjoying the show. The 
only thing was, her mother didn't even sip soda, much less something with 
alcohol in it. Something was definitely wrong here. Her mother was 
usually in tears by this point in the movie; sobbing pathetically until 
she passed out in a drunken state. 
 
"Are you sure you're all right Mom? You're acting weird," said the girl 
as she looked even more confused. 
 
"They're about to get a whole lot weirder, Usa-chan," said the woman 
cheerfully. "You don't think that's a bad thing do you?" 
 
"No," she replied honestly. 
 
"Well, let's get something to eat. I've got a lot to watch tonight," 
said the woman as she stood up with a cheerful bounce that she'd never 
once seen in the woman. 
 
"I'll cook Mom..." said Usagi as she tried to head her off at the 
kitchen. 
 
"What? You think that I can't?" said the woman as she narrowed her eyes 
at her daughter. 
 
"No. I know you can't cook," replied the girl flatly. 
 
"Shows how much you know!" snapped the woman in retort. "I was single 
and in college once! I can cook things you've probably never even heard 
of!" 
 
Usagi frowned at this. "Right. You can't even make Instant Ramen mom!" 
 
"I am so going to kill us," thought Yohiko to herself. "Well, I hate to 
break it to you, but I do know how to cook dear. I just...didn't have it 
in me anymore," she said to her daughter. 
 
The girl blinked. "Well I suppose. I have to watch you though." 
 
"We'll talk while I work then," said the woman with a small shrug. 
 
"Um...right..." said Usagi nervously. 
 
"What do you remember about your father?" asked Yohiko cheerfully as she 
began to put vegetables into the sink. 
 
"Not much," admitted the girl honestly. "His voice, his face, a few 
moments, nothing else." 
 
"Well. I suppose it has been a long time hasn't it?" asked Yohiko as she 
twirled a kitchen knife around her finger. "Heh. I've still got it." 
 
Usagi's jaw dropped like a rock. The woman who had proven time and time 
again that she couldn't even make toast without burning it, was now 
slicing vegetables at an insane rate of speed, and doing it in perfectly 
even slices. "Watch your..." 
 
Yohiko stopped just in front of her finger and left the knife stuck in 
the cutting board. She then turned to the stove and started the burners 
while filling a pot with water. "Let's see now..." 
 
++++++++++++ 
 
"This isn't possible..." muttered Usagi as she looked at the table 
setting in front of her in awe. Her mother had just made a traditional 
Japanese meal, and was now sitting cheerfully across from her. She was 
also eating at an insane rate of speed. "Whrt? Yur nt hngry?" said the 
woman through a full mouth of food. 
 
Usagi blinked and started eating. "What's wrong with her?" she thought. 
 
"You should be wondering what's right with me now," said Yohiko as she 
smirked at her daughter and took a drink from her glass. 
 
"Huh?" said the girl in confusion. 
 
"I know that look you're giving me. You're wondering what's wrong with 
me. Let's just say I was...reborn so to speak." 
 
The girl merely nodded, not sure how to reply to that. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
"Boring, boring, boring, what the hell was I thinking, boring, 
boring...I don't have any good clothes? Man this sucks!" said Yohiko as 
she tossed things across the room from her closet. 
 
"What are you looking for?" asked Usagi in confusion. 
 
"Something to wear that doesn't make me look forty," said the woman as 
she glared at her closet in frustration. "Man. I was really this far 
gone?" She turned back and looked down at the clothes that were strewn 
about the room for a moment. "I guess I'll work around it for now." 
 
"Um. Right," said Usagi in confusion as she left the woman alone. 
 
"I don't even have red lipstick. What's with all this neutral crap?" 
snapped her mother as she closed the door behind her. 
 
"What the hell happened to her?" muttered Usagi as she scurried away. 
 
+++++++++++ 
 
"No! Something's wrong with Miss Yohiko?" said Yusaku Godai as he 
gripped the young girl sitting across from him by her shoulders and shook 
her. 
 
"Cut that out!" she snapped. 
 
"I'm sorry! But..." 
 
"I didn't say there was anything wrong, but she's acting really weird," 
said the girl with a frown on her face. 
 
"Weird how?" said the brunette who was sitting with them in a skimpy 
negligee.  
 
"Most unusual," agreed the snake-like man who was halfway hidden by a 
hole in the wall that led to his own apartment. 
 
"She's... well... happy," said the young teen in frustration. "I don't 
know what to do! She's gone off the wall completely." 
 
"She never seemed unhappy to me. A little quiet and reserved, maybe even 
shy," said the brunette. "Pretty much a stick in the mud." 
 
"I don't know how to describe it, but she's so...active...tonight!" said 
the girl as she frowned at the trio for a moment. 
 
"Those tennis classes of hers aren't active?" asked the woman as she 
took a swig of beer from the can resting between her legs. 
 
"I suppose," said the girl. 
 
"She's not...going too..." said Yusaku with a fearful looking frown on 
his face. "I mean...cancel our..." 
 
"I said I'd help you didn't I?" snapped Usagi. "Don't worry, she'll go 
out with you like we planned." 
 
"A most unusual choice, the poor teacher as opposed to the rich tennis 
coach," said the man who was halfway through the wall. 
 
"Can it Yotsuya!" snapped the girl irritably. "He's got more in common 
with her. I can tell she likes them both, but..." 
 
"I'll do what I can to help!" said Yusaku firmly. 
 
"Yeah. Help get yourself into our neighbors pants," snorted the woman. 
 
"All I want is for someone to help her get over my Dad," said the girl 
as she frowned at the woman. "It's been seven years." 
 
"Well, I'm your man!" said Yusaku boldly. 
 
"You do realize, that if she shows so much as a hint more interest in 
our hunky tennis coach, you're out the door," said the woman as she took 
another swig of her beer. 
 
"Don't be so mean, Akemi!" cried the man fearfully. 
 
"Well, she's right, but you're the best bet right now. I said I wasn't 
playing sides in this. Either one of you is fine," said Usagi firmly. 
 
"Right!" said Yusaku as he stood up and tried to look determined. 
 
"I'm going back now," said Usagi flatly. 
 
"I'll see you tomorrow then," said Yusaku. "Don't worry! I won't let you 
down!" 
 
"Better not, or you're meat!" said the girl as she closed his door. 
 
Yusaku hung his head and sighed. 
 
"Feeling the pressure now eh?" said Akemi as she winked at him. 
 
"Just shut up would you?" he grumbled irritably. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
"What are you doing now?" asked Usagi as she found her mother hunched 
over the stacks of photo albums in the closet.  
 
"Acclimating," said the woman as she looked up at her daughter 
cheerfully. "Our life was pretty boring." 
 
"Hey!" said the girl defensively. 
 
"I mean...my life was much more interesting before him," said Yohiko 
cheerfully. "Martial arts, adventure, um...I dressed better too." 
 
"Martial arts?" asked Usagi dumbly. 
 
"I was the best in the world, before he came along," said Yohiko as she 
frowned for a moment.  
 
"What?" said Usagi in confusion. "You never said anything about this to 
me before." 
 
"I'm thinking of picking it up again," said the woman cheerfully.  
 
"Oh," said the girl as she looked uncomfortable with this. "Are you sure 
you're all right?" 
 
"I'm fine dear. Never better!" said the woman cheerfully. 
 
"Well, I guess I'll go to bed then," said Usagi as she moved towards her 
room. 
 
"All right. Goodnight Usa-chan!" said the woman as she smiled at her. 
 
+++++++++++++++ 
 
"Either you're way over doing it, or you're really enjoying this," said 
Carrot. 
 
"I've got a daughter!" cried Xianfu euphorically. 
 
"I guess she's really enjoying this then," commented Dan. 
 
"Maybe we should slow down a bit," grumbled Pissant. "If we go to fast, 
she'll get suspicious." 
 
"Screw that! This chick is pathetic!" cried Ranma. 
 
"So much for that idea," said Carrot cheerfully. "So. Now what?" 
 
"Back to the videos," said Dan. 
 
"Right!" agreed Carrot. 
 
"Man, this is boring," said Ranma irritably. 
 
"You should want to know about our daughter's life!" snapped Xianfu. 
 
"She was cute when she was little, what else do we need to know?" asked 
Ranma irritably. 
 
"A lot. Especially if we're going to pull this off," said Carrot as he 
picked up the remote and their glass of wine again. 
 
++++++++++++++ 
 
Usagi sighed as she opened the door from their room. Her mother hadn't 
been there when she woke up. "Maybe Yusaku came over and she got laid?" 
she muttered hopefully. Finding her mother sprawled out across the floor 
in the living room wasn't unusual, but seeing her spread out across the 
ground roughly while snoring was. The woman reached up and scratched her 
chest before rubbing her nose and flinging her arm back onto the ground 
again. 
 
The girl sighed and stepped over her, moving towards the kitchen. 
 
Usagi blinked as a knock came at the door. She looked up at the clock 
and frowned. Her mother was sleeping in, most unusual. 
 
When she opened the door, a short fat woman grinned up at her with a 
tennis racket held over her shoulder. "Hiya! Where's your mother?" 
 
"Um. Hi Mrs. Ichinose," said the girl as she stepped aside and waved her 
arm, revealing her mother in all her lazy glory. 
 
"She's sleeping in? That's odd," said the woman as she looked down at 
her with her hands on her hips. 
 
"Very," agreed Usagi with a small sigh. 
 
Ichinose poked her in the nose, and she blinked. Yohiko yawned lazily 
and looked at the woman's face. "I seen worse. You got nothin on that old 
ghoul." 
 
This caused them both to blink as she rolled over and clutched her 
pillow, going back to sleep. 
 
"Hey! Wake up, we'll be late for class!" said the fat woman as she shook 
her again. 
 
"Class!? Oh no! I'll be late for work!" cried the woman as she jumped up 
suddenly. "Hey. It's...Saturday." She relaxed and looked at the woman who 
was kneeling next to her. "What is it?" 
 
"We've got class today. Remember?" said the woman as she pointed at her 
racket. 
 
Yohiko yawned and frowned at this. "Tennis? How boring." 
 
"Well, I'll admit the game is pretty boring," said Ichinose. "But the 
scenery sure is nice! That hunky tennis coach Mitaka, remember?" 
 
"Boring," said the younger woman as she stood up and stretched. "I'm not 
going anymore. I decided to pick up a new sport." 
 
Ichinose looked at her with a frown on her face. "What would that be?" 
 
"Why, the Hibiki Family School of Anything Goes Martial Arts!" said the 
woman cheerfully as she smiled at the woman. 
 
Ichinose calmly lit a cigarette and looked up at her for a moment. "Yer 
kiddin right?" 
 
Yohiko shook her head from side to side cheerfully. "No. I'm quite 
serious. I learned it when I was younger, before I met my husband. I was 
one of the very best martial artists in the world. In fact, I probably 
still am." 
 
"Right. I'll just tell the coach you aren't feeling well then," said 
Ichinose as she turned away. 
 
"I wonder how long it will take him to get over here after she tells him 
I'm sick?" asked Yohiko with a snort. 
 
"I thought you were just friends," commented Usagi. 
 
"You kiddin? That love sick moron? It's downright pathetic a guy like 
that acts that way because of me," replied her mother. 
 
Usagi sprayed the drink she had been consuming across the room. 
 
"What is it?" asked the woman as she looked down at her for a moment and 
smirked. 
 
"Oh! Heh heh! Nothing...it's just...you're..." 
 
"Not as stupid as you thought I was? Really dear," said the woman 
cheerfully. "Well, I'm going out to do some shopping. Later." 
 
+++++++++++++++++ 
 
"Yohiko!" cried a voice from behind her as she walked out of the store 
with an armload of bags in her hands. 
 
"Huh?" she muttered as she turned to see a rather handsome looking man 
jogging up to her dressed in a tennis uniform. "Oh. Hi." 
 
"I heard you were sick?" he said as he stopped running and looked at her 
in confusion. She was wearing an unusual looking Chinese outfit. "What's 
this?" 
 
"New look. Got tired of the boring housewife thing," said the woman with 
a shrug. "Anyway. I'm fine. Ichinose just assumed." 
 
"Oh. That's a relief," said the man as he smiled at her. 
 
"No it isn't, you'd rather have taken care of me. Trying to impress me 
and all that," she replied calmly. 
 
"Um...that isn't true," said the man lamely. 
 
"Anyway, I'm sorry to say that I won't be taking tennis lessons any 
longer," she said as she smiled at him. 
 
"WHAT?!" he cried in a panic.  
 
"I'm getting back into martial arts again. I've been neglecting my duty 
to my family," she said with a small sigh. "It's all his fault too." 
 
"His fault?" muttered Mitaka uncertainly.  
 
"My husband, I don't know what the hell happened to me. It's as if I 
just realized that being married wussed me out or something. It kind of 
sucks." 
 
The man walked up beside her and tried his best to smile. "So...you were 
a martial artist?" 
 
"I am a martial artist. I'm still more than enough to take you down 
fitness boy," she said as he smirked at him. 
 
"I'll bet you are," he said with a nervous looking grin appearing on his 
face. 
 
"At any rate, I'm not going to be taking lessons anymore. I just won't 
have time, what with my new job and all." 
 
"New job?" replied the man as he looked at her for a moment. 
 
"I'm the new English teacher at Furinkan High," she said calmly. 
 
"I didn't know you taught," said the man with a frown on his face. 
 
"I did before I was married," she said cheerfully. 
 
Mitaka frowned and looked her over for a moment. "Just how old is she? 
She went to college before she got married? I always assumed that all 
this happened when he was still around," he thought to himself. 
 
"Well, that's wonderful!" said the man cheerfully. "I've just accepted a 
job there myself!" 
 
Yohiko stopped in her tracks and stared at him. "You're going to be 
working at Furinkan? Doing what?" 
 
"Teaching Tennis," he said as he held up his racket. "I was offered the 
job a few months ago, but I wasn't interested; I think I'll take it now." 
 
"Oh. That's nice," she replied with a shrug. "You'd better be ready for 
Furinkan though, I hope you don't get hurt too badly." 
 
He looked at her in confusion for a moment. "Pardon?" 
 
She gave him a knowing grin and walked ahead of him. "You'll see." 
 
"Right. I'll see you later then," he replied with a small frown on his 
face. "I wonder what she meant by that?" 
 
+++++++++++++++ 
 
Sweat seemed to sparkle in the sunlight as Yohiko shoved out a solid 
punch in the air. She rocked back on her heels for a moment as her hair 
whipped around behind her from the force of her movement. She quickly 
turned into a set of spinning kicks that turned into sweeps so fluidly 
that it was difficult to see when one started at the other began. 
Spinning up to her feet again, she started a complicated mix of punches 
and blocks that ended in a front kick. "Hiyah!" 
 
On the porch of the apartment, the residents sat staring. Some harder 
than others.  
 
"Stop that! It's creepy!" snapped Usagi as she smacked Yusaku in the 
back of his head. He looked like his eyes were about to pop out of his 
head. 
 
"Very impressive," said Akemi as she took a drag off of her cigarette.  
 
"Wow. Never knew she had it in her," agreed Ichinose. 
 
"Most impressive. This comes as a surprise to even me," commented 
Yotsuya. 
 
"Wow! Miss Hibiki sure is good!" said Ichinose's son Kintaro. He was a 
little younger than Usagi, in his early teens. 
 
"Usagi! What the hell are you doing sitting there? Get your lazy butt 
out here!" said Yohiko firmly. 
 
"What? Me!?" cried the girl dumbly. "I don't want to learn martial 
arts!" 
 
"You'll come out here this instant and learn your family heritage like a 
good Hibiki!" snapped her mother. 
 
Usagi blinked and looked at the others. 
 
"Don't look at me," said Yusaku flatly. "I'll agree with anything she 
says, remember?" 
 
"Great," she mumbled as she walked out into the yard and looked at her 
mother. "So?" 
 
"We'll get you a proper dogi or something tomorrow," said the woman as 
she snorted at the girl. "I've already shamed the family by neglecting 
this for as long as I have. You'll learn fast, don't worry." 
 
The girl swallowed and found the gaze her mother was giving her was very 
uncomfortable. "Umm...okay." 
 
"We'll start out light, since it's your first day," said the woman as 
she looked up at the crowd on the porch. "This isn't a free show you 
know. If you want to learn come out here, otherwise beat it!" 
 
Yusaku found himself sitting alone on the porch. "Huh?" He glanced 
around and swallowed. "I guess...for you Miss Yohiko..." he mumbled as he 
stood up. 
 
"You realize that once you commit, there's no backing down boy," said 
the woman as she smirked at him. 
 
He blinked. He was in reasonable shape, after all the jobs he'd taken in 
college doing physical work, and of course the odd job he'd gotten during 
the off months at the school as well. "Anything to spend more time with 
you Miss Yohiko!" 
 
The woman gave him a grin he didn't like. He swallowed again and backed 
away. "I promise you'll regret saying that in a weeks time. Your ass is 
mine now, Godai." 
 
"Mom. You're scaring me," said Usagi nervously. 
 
"I'm not afraid!" said Godai pathetically. 
 
"Oooh! You will be, you will be," said Yohiko as she peered at him for a 
moment. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
Usagi groaned painfully as she lay across a futon in Yusaku's room. 
"What the hell happened to her?" 
 
"Horrible! Horrible!" muttered Yusaku fearfully as he clutched a pillow 
and curled into a ball nearby. 
 
"I thought this was what you always wanted?" said Akemi with a small 
snort. 
 
"I didn't think it would hurt this much. I wanted a normal mother, 
not...this!" snapped the girl. "Still, it is a lot better. To think, my 
mother would be saved by a mid-life crisis." 
 
"She's a little young to be having one of those yet," said Akemi. 
 
Usagi went silent and looked at her. "..." 
 
"She is isn't she?" asked the woman as she suddenly paused and looked at 
the girl. 
 
"Yes," said the girl in a sort of uncertain monotone. Of course, she'd 
never pointed out that by their reasoning, she would have had her when 
she was eleven, rather than twenty-two. It had always seemed wise not to 
point this out to them though, especially after the torturous training 
her mother had just submitted her too. It had only lasted an hour, but it 
felt like four. 
 
"So. What time should I come by tonight?" asked Yusaku as he crawled 
over to the conversation. 
 
"You can still move?" said the girl as she stared at him. 
 
"Barely, and after that I'd say I earned this date!" he replied weakly. 
 
"Around eight I guess, I should get home too. Somebody pick me up and 
stand me on my feet," said Usagi as she stared up at everyone. 
 
Yusaku was the only one who bothered. It was a rather pathetic display 
really, he was tugging on her chest while squatting down, and doing 
little more than forcing her arms up and dragging her a few inches. 
 
"Hey! Watch the hands buddy!" cried the girl irritably. 
 
"Oh, sorry," he muttered as he shifted his grip. 
 
"Stop it! I'll do it myself!" she cried as she rolled out of his grip. 
He was flat on his back the instant she was off of him. It took a minute, 
but she struggled to her feet and staggered out the door. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
"Don't worry dear, it only hurts at first," said Yohiko as she smiled at 
her daughter. "You'll be glad I did this soon." 
 
"Right," grumbled the girl lamely. "You did remember what you promised 
right?" 
 
This caught the woman by surprise. "Promised?" 
 
"Mo-ther!" said the girl as she put her hands on her hips and glared at 
her. 
 
"Humor me dear. I've been busy lately," said her mother cheerfully. 
 
"You promised to let Yusaku take you out tonight, remember?" said the 
girl flatly. 
 
"Oh. I did? I'm gonna kill us," said the woman with her face frozen in a 
smile. 
 
"What did you just say?" said Usagi in a sort of shocked horror. 
 
"Oh. I didn't mean you dear," said the woman as she waved the comment 
off. "I had completely forgotten about that." 
 
"Well, you did promise," said the girl as she crossed her arms. "He's 
really excited." 
 
"Oh. Like that's hard to do," said Yohiko with a small chuckle. 
 
"Mother really!" gasped Usagi with a blush on her face. 
 
"I suppose I'll let him, if he can still move to do it," said the woman 
with a small sigh. "After all, I did promise." Her face lit up suddenly. 
"Maybe we'll run into some ruffians! Or get mugged! That would be so 
great, I haven't had a good fight in so long! I just want to smash 
something!"  
 
Usagi blinked as her mother flexed her arm with a sort of pleased smile 
on her face. "Um...right." 
 
"Anyway, I'll be ready," said the woman as she nodded at her daughter. 
 
"Great! He'll be here at eight!" 
 
"Right. I guess I should go get started then," said the woman as she 
looked up at the clock. "Half an hour should be plenty." 
 
Usagi blinked at this. Her mother couldn't get ready to go to the store 
in half an hour, much less a date. 
 
+++++++++++++++ 
 
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! 
!!!!!!!" Usagi was passed out cold on the floor as Yohiko stepped out of 
her room a half-hour later.  
 
"I wonder what's wrong with her?" she said as she looked down at her 
daughter. 
 
The girl woke up and gasped. "What the hell are you wearing!?" 
 
"This? I thought I should at least look nice, even if it is just for 
some stupid promise," said the woman cheerfully. She was wearing a 
skintight one-piece dress and a black leather jacket. The skirt on the 
dress went all the way down to her knees and the neckline went all the 
way up to her neck in a turtleneck. She had on no makeup besides a little 
lipstick and hadn't changed her hair at all. The only other glaring 
change were the black earrings that now hung from her ears. They were 
little more than pieces of black diamond shaped plastic hanging from 
small hoops.  
 
There was a knock at the door and she opened it. 
 
Yusaku was standing with flowers in his hands. His jaw dropped and the 
flowers fell to the ground. 
 
"What?" she asked him. "I know I look good, but this is ridiculous." 
 
Akemi stepped out into the hall and blinked as she looked the woman up 
and down. She strolled up to her and blinked several times. "Can I borrow 
that some time?" 
 
"I don't see why not," replied Yohiko cheerfully. 
 
"Great. So, you're taking him out?" said the brunette as she jerked her 
thumb at the frozen Yusaku. 
 
"Yes. I promised," said Yohiko cheerfully. "I suppose he'll wake up 
soon. I hope we don't end up standing here all night." 
 
"Well, tell me if he's any good," said Akemi as she looked the woman up 
and down and smiled at him. 
 
"Don't be silly. I'm just teasing him to be cruel," said Yohiko as she 
smiled back. 
 
"Ha!" said Akemi as she walked back into her room and closed the door 
behind her. 
 
"Well, wake up stupid, I'd like to get this over with," she said as she 
grabbed her date by his arm.  
 
That seemed to snap him out of it and he staggered along beside her. "I 
um...got us some reservations..." 
 
"Yes. I assumed," said Yohiko as she looked him up and down. He was 
wearing a suit. It wasn't a tuxedo, just some black slacks with a gray 
jacket; he was also wearing a tie. 
 
"Great!" said the man as he started to pull her along. 
 
"I'm surprised you can still move," said the woman as she looked at him. 
 
"I've been hurt worse than that! I had all sorts of difficult jobs in 
college." 
 
"Oh. That's nice. You do realize that no matter how much you impress me 
tonight, you're not getting laid, right?" 
 
He looked at her dumbly and blinked twice. "What?" 
 
"Nothing. Come on," she replied with a sigh. 
 
+++++++++++++++ 
 
Outside they strolled down the stairs and bumped into a familiar figure. 
 
Mitaka was standing on the steps and looking at them in surprise. "Going 
somewhere?" 
 
"Yusaku is taking me out to dinner," said Yohiko as she looked at him. 
"Why are you here?" 
 
"Well, I was hoping to see you. I wanted to talk about this new school a 
little. We are going to be working together." 
 
"No! Mitaka will ruin everything!" thought Yusaku desperately. "Wait a 
minute! Working together?" he said out loud as he suddenly realized what 
had been said. 
 
"Mitaka is going to be working at the school I'm teaching at as a tennis 
coach," said Yohiko as she smirked at him. 
 
"You're teaching again?" asked Yusaku in confusion.  
 
"Yes. She told me this morning," said Mitaka smugly.  
 
"That's great!" said Yusaku as he ignored him. "What class?" 
 
"English," replied the woman cheerfully.  
 
"If you're going out to eat, I know a nice place nearby," said Mitaka as 
he grinned at Yusaku. 
 
"I'm sorry Mitaka, but I promised Usagi I'd let him have one date," said 
the woman as she looked down at the man.  
 
"Well, that's hardly fair. I should get a date too," said the man. 
 
"All is fair in love and war," said Yohiko coolly as she grinned at him. 
"Like you trying to cut off his chance just now." 
 
Mitaka blushed. "I..." 
 
"I find it kind of amusing the way you two fight all the time, you think 
I don't notice do you?" said the woman as she looked between them. 
 
They both turned away. 
 
"At any rate, I'm taking him out tonight, so if you'll excuse me," she 
said as she walked by the man. 
 
"But...where does that leave me!?" cried Mitaka in horror. 
 
"No better or worse than you were before," she said to him. "I'm keeping 
a promise right now. That's all. I won't get roped into another one just 
because you're a little jealous." 
 
Mitaka smiled at her. "I see." 
 
Yusaku wasn't sure if he should be upset, insulted, or happy. He 
shrugged and decided with the latter. After all, he was the one taking 
Miss Yohiko out on a date. 
 
+++++++++++++++++ 
 
The dinner went well, Yusaku had actually managed to make it though 
without embarrassing himself. He'd actually been wise enough to not tell 
anyone where he'd made reservations. Yohiko had managed to lose their 
tail as well, it wasn't that hard considering they had to move through a 
rather busy crowd of people on the way to the restaurant.  
 
Ducking out of the restaurant she smiled at him as he took her arm. 
"Miss Yohiko...about tonight. I mean." 
 
"Yusaku, I don't want to hurt you, you seem like a nice guy. To put it 
bluntly, I'm not really interested in any man right now." 
 
"Well, I'll wait as long as it takes," he said firmly. 
 
"Yes. Mitaka said something similar, I'm afraid I may have to beat that 
out of the both of you," said the woman as she smirked to herself. 
 
"Huh?" said the man as he glanced at her fearfully. 
 
"Don't worry about it," she said cheerfully.  
 
She looked around at where they were now walking and grinned. It was a 
bad neighborhood. "All right!" she said as she cracked her knuckles. 
 
"Huh?" said Yusaku. "Hey! When did we get here? I don't remember this 
place..." 
 
They were quickly surrounded by a large group of young punks.  
 
The lead punk strolled up to them and smirked. "Well what have we here?" 
He strolled up to them and looked Yohiko up and down. "Nice. How 'bout 
the purse lady? Maybe then I'll let you go!" 
 
"Get behind me Miss Yohiko!" said Yusaku as he moved in front of her. 
 
"Out of the way weenie boy!" snorted the woman as she shoved him aside 
and walked up to the punk boldly. "So. You gonna show me your knife or 
what?" 
 
"Huh?" said just about everyone. 
 
Yahiko rolled her eyes. "Not that one! The one you're supposed to 
threaten me with now. Come on, think you can get my purse away? If you 
can get it, you deserve it." 
 
"Right," said the punk as he backed away and pulled out a switchblade.  
 
"How cliché, and it's so small too," said the woman calmly. "The knife 
too." 
 
"What? Lady, you're starting to piss me off!" said the punk angrily. 
 
"Good, that's my plan," she replied. "Come on. Show me what you've got!" 
 
The boy rushed forward swinging the knife down. "Lady! I'm gonna enjoy 
this! Don't worry I won't hurt ya too bad. Cause we're gonna have a 
little fun after." 
 
"Yohiko!" cried Yusaku as he struggled with the garbage bags he'd landed 
in. 
 
The woman merely smiled as she spun into a kick that took the boy across 
his jaw. She turned quickly, and managed to tag him a few times in his 
body, keeping him from falling. Finally, she finished with a jumping 
uppercut that sent him flying across the street. 
 
The other punks looked at him and then back at the woman who was 
standing in the middle of their circle in a combat stance. 
 
"Come get some," she said coolly. 
 
"Fuck that! I seen too many movies for this shit!" cried one of the boys 
as he dropped the lead pipe he'd been carrying and ran away. The rest of 
the group followed, dropping chains, bats, and assorted other weapons as 
they fled. 
 
"Come back here and fight like the idiots you are!" screamed the woman 
irritably as she tapped her heel on the pavement. 
 
"Miss Yohiko?" asked the dumbfounded Yusaku as he finally managed to 
stagger out of the garbage bags. 
 
She grabbed him by his collar and pulled him up to her face. "Don't ever 
jump in front of me that way again. Do you have any idea how bad Usagi 
would have felt if you'd been hurt?" 
 
"Um? Usagi?" he said. 
 
"She'd feel terrible for having sent you out with me," said the woman as 
she shook him. "Besides, if you do it again, I'll beat the crap out of 
you. No one butts in on my fights buddy!" 
 
"Right!" he said as he nodded vigorously. 
 
"Well, let's get back. I've got to work tomorrow," said Yohiko calmly as 
she strolled away. 
 
Yusaku stumbled along behind her and tried to keep up. 
 
+++++++++++++ 
 
"How was the date?" asked Usagi as she looked up at her mother as she 
walked into the home. 
 
"Why aren't you in bed yet? You've got school tomorrow," said the woman 
as she narrowed her eyes at the girl. 
 
Usagi blinked, got a joyous look on her face, and rushed up to grab her 
mother in a rough hug. "Thank you!" 
 
"For what?" said the woman dumbly as she looked down at her. 
 
"You've never scolded me for not being asleep that way before!" said the 
girl with tears in her eyes. 
 
"It'll get old fast dear. Now go to bed," said the woman as she pat her 
daughter on the head. 
 
"Right!" Usagi jumped up and kissed her mother on the cheek before 
rushing away. 
 
The woman got a wistful smile on her face and watched her vanish into 
her room.  
 
"Well. I've had enough of being this chick for a while," said Carrot. 
"We should go to sleep too. We've got to go to school in the morning 
too." 
 
"Right," agreed everyone else. 
 
"I hate us," grumbled Dan. 
 
"No shit," said Carrot. "You've been saying that all day." 
 
"Well, tomorrow should be interesting if nothing else," said Xianfu. 
 
"That's an understatement," commented Carrot lazily. 
 
"Off to bed then," said Pissant. 
 
"It's still out there you know," said Ranma. 
 
"What?" asked Carrot. 
 
"That power we felt, it's close now," said Ranma softly. 
 
"Yeah. It'll probably be here tomorrow," agreed Carrot. "Nothing we 
can't handle if we need to, and I doubt if we will." 
 
"Right," said Dan. "Can we just get some sleep now. I'm tired." 
 
"Aww, Is oo cranky?" said Carrot. 
 
Dan promptly decked himself. 
 
"Ouch. Don't be so sensitive," grumbled Carrot. 
 
They stumbled away and went to bed. 
 
+++++++++++ 
 
TB