Ok, there are four main people we shall talk about:
1st Person: Person reeking of wretch (Reeker)
2nd Person: Brother of Reeker who can't make simple directions for a game that lasts 2 seconds (Directional)
3rd Person: Boy who puts down window constantly and then migrates his ass elsewhere (Windower)
4th person: Girl who believes she is God (Idiot)
AHEM! So, let us commence with this rant. First we will talk about Reeker. Reeker always chooses to sit next to me. Pete (bus driver) decided that all middle school and up graders will sit behind or IN the 6th seat. I sit in the 6th seat and Reeker always goes and sits in the first seat, gets yelled at by Pete, moves to the second, gets yelled at, and so on until he slams his reekful body into my seat. I'm just sitting there peacefully and all of a sudden I am SO overcome by fumes that I believe bashing my head into the window until it busts open and I can stick my head out to get fresh air would be better than breathing in Reeker's reek. This is one of the only times that Windower comes in handy.
Since we're on that topic, let us carry on. Widower is about 7 years old and enjoys sticking his head out of the window (and inhaling random bugs, I suppose). The temperature could be 6 degrees below 0 and I would have no doubt in my mind that Windower would have his head out of the window, with his tongue hanging out like a dog's, enjoying his ride as he gets frostbite. Not that I mind him freezing his ass off, as that is not what bothers me. The thing that bothers me is that he chooses to freeze his ass off two seats in front of mine, which causes me in turn to feel the wrath of the cold air, and I too begin freezing my ass off. You might think that if he had his head out of the window, it would block the air. Right, well it WOULD, if he didn't migrate his ass to another seat and sit there the rest of the time. Meanwhile, I freeze my ass off. Plus... I'll probably get nailed in the eye one of these days, either by a twig that Pete hit while going 80 in a residential zone, or by a stupid 5 year old boy who believes that throwing rocks out of the window at passersby is fun! One day, the rock is gonna smack someone who will throw it back and come through Windower's open window (which his head is not sticking out of, unfortunately) and hit me square in the eye. Maybe then Directional can make a game about my hurt eye with some SHORT rules.
And speaking of HIM, he decides to make one hell of a game. Not because it's fun and easy to play, but because it has around 600 rules! So, Directional hops on the bus and sits next to a bunch of 6 year olds and explains his "fun and easy" game. It goes something like this:
Directional: Ok, so I'm the blue ranger and I control water and you're the red one and you control fire. He's the green one and he controls grass and he's the purple one and he controls flowers! So-
Kid: Who am I?
D: The red one... you control fire!
Kid: COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
Kid 2: Who am I?
D: The purple one... you control flowers!
Kid 2: I want to control fire! *cries*
D: You can't because HE controls fire.
Kid 2: *beats everlasting piss outta aforementioned "red ranger"*
D: *calms them down* Now... basically, you can zap them with your fingers, but only the middle and index ones-
Kid 3: What are those?
D: *shows them*
All Kids: *go about flipping people off*
D: NO! Anyway, only with those fingers and you have to make a "whoosh" sound or else it doesn't count and you can only touch their shoulders, chest, or neck. Ready! GO!
~Random pushing, pulling, screaming, and yelling for about 2 seconds~
D: THE END! I win!
