HeartBeatHeartBeat
I don't mean to start the page off on a sour note, but... This is dedicated to my first boyfriend-"lovingly" reffered to as Jerk-Boy (or Duck-Boy...picture refered to will soon be displayed here...). The poem should be self-explanitory...
I sit here alone in the pain & the darkness
And all you can do is throw dirt in my face
I know I hurt you (when I broke it off), but you don't have to point it out
(You hurt me too, and I don't shove it into your face)
I really don't want to hear it.
My soul is tattered and torn & lying dying on the floor
But you don't care, as long as you can even out the score.
Why can't you see that it isn't just me?
I'm not the only one who hurt someone...
we share the blame.
we share the pain.
I know what I did was wrong (pretending to love you when it was farthest from my mind), that's why I stopped.
You know this is hurting me, but you just have to top
Whatever hill I created, you covbered with a mountain.
The score is not kept, there's no one counting
Stop hurting me now...
stop blaming me for it all
and taking your "fair shots"
Not even the friendship we sought.
Good Night my love, and don't blame me
Your broken heart would not be
without our love (or your lust) to have created it.
Good Night...
Now, on to some of the romantic & love-filled stuff...
A Magnetic Poetry Creation (these things are so cool, we have them all over the fridge at school)
Bodies softly melting into trembling happiness
And we two make sun-charmed pleasures grow
Incredible touch should cherish passion
Too funny to hold stars
Angel's eyes sparkle in Moonlight over our souls
First laugh. Beautiful boy(then fall for me)
Connected lives (we both shall lead)
Back to the sappy, heartbreak again...
If only for one night/ my heart wouldn't break/ and my soul wouldn't ache/ to feel the love again/ to know your gentle touch/ I need one night to heal/ one year to see/ the pain you left behind/ when you left me/ I need to stop this foolish maddness/ caused by my eternal sadness/ Nothing more can come of life/if never more do I see teh light of day/ and exclaim, like a small child/ my delight at the dawning of a new day/ For sorrow is all I see/ tainting the indigo sky in shades of crimson/ The life I knew never again shall be/ The love I felt for you Wretched from me/ My heart breaks and my soul aches/ the end is near for me (at least the end of our love)/ My will to live is miles away/ but my will to die is nowhere near/ My existence is dull (without you here)/ deaf to the joy beyond, mute to the tears/ If only for one night/ I'd live my life in peace for once (again)/ and the pain is farthest fromm my mind/ The one impossible goal/ the one paramount task, to live again (without you) before I die(without you).
The parenthases were added on 8/6/98...
Some more mushy stuff... A poem about friendships afterwards...
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