Warnings: Shonen-ai, sap, general kawaii-ness, BORED Schuldig, and a very irritated immobile Aya @_@

Disclaimers: Weiss is all Takehito Koyasu and Project Weiss. Power to them. A/N:. ::Schuldig thought:: //Everyone else�s thought//. ~ Ken�s writing ~

I have no idea where the hell this came from. It�s my first day off work in a while... and I just thought of this, laughed, decided to write it... oi, not a good thing. O_o Enjoy?

~*~ Part One: Under the Weather ~*~

Manx came down the stairs into the mission room, still feeling generally confused by the lack of kittens in the flower shop. Where had Weiss gone? Honestly, so much as turn your back and they just disappear! Manx sighed heavily, rounding the last corner of the stairs, suddenly realizing there was someone on the couch. �Hello?� Manx called carefully. A small blonde head popped up.

�Hey, Manx-san,� Omi replied groggily. He went back down on the couch. Manx took a few steps forward and blushed. Omi wasn�t alone on the couch. Ken was resting below him, apparently asleep. Sure, Manx knew about their relationship, but she wasn�t used to such an open display. Omi rested his head on Ken�s shoulder, letting the blanket fall up against his cheek. �Why are you here?� the small boy asked in a weak voice. It was so atypical of Omi.

�You guys have a mission. Where is everyone?� Manx glanced around the room. There was no joking playboy, no stoic redhead; just the sleeping Ken and his little bishonen boyfriend. �Did they go out? I noticed the shop was closed. That�s weird for a Saturday during winter vacation, you know.�

�Yohji-kun is resting in my room,� Omi explained, motioning to the door that led to where he kept his personal computer. �Last I saw, Aya-kun went in there grumbling about being too cold.� Omi sighed, gently rubbing his cheek against Ken�s shirt. �I�m not so sure that going on a mission is a good idea. You see... we all have the flu.� Omi�s eyes fluttered shut, and a very small smile formed on his face.

�The flu?� Manx silently cursed. She had tried to hold off the missions from Weiss for as long as possible just so she could let them rest. This was the first one where, of all Kritiker�s teams, it had to be their best, Weiss. �Even Aya is completely gone?� Omi just nodded. �Damn, well, I guess I�ll show you guys the mission anyway,� Manx said almost wistfully waving her hand for emphasis.

�Mission?� A voice wondered. Manx turned to see Yohji, wearing sweats and wrapped in what looked to be an afghan stumbling into the room. �Aya�ll be pissed. He�s SO stuck in bed. He has a higher fever than before, bishonen. I gave him another blanket, but he�s still shivering.� Yohji didn�t even flirt with Manx. In fact, he hardly recognized her. That was a bad sign.

�Poor Aya-kun,� Omi muttered. He opened his eyes to smile fondly at the object of his affections under him. �Ken-kun�s still asleep. How are you feeling?�

�Cold,� was all Yohji replied. �You?�

�A little nauseous, actually,� Omi replied, his eyes closing again. �Otherwise I would go back to sleep.�

�Ib not thtuck in bed,� Aya�s voice suddenly came from behind Yohji. He was comically wrapped in a comforter, and barely standing, using the wall as a means to hold himself up. Yohji turned to him, looking a little alarmed, and took Aya into his arms. �I don need your help,� Aya muttered pitifully. �Ib fine.�

�Not for a mission, your not. Go back to bed, Aya,� Yohji insisted. Yohji gently stroked Aya�s hair fondly. �You�re so determined, but even you deserve a break sometimes, Aya.� Yohji pulled Aya against him completely, the comforter being drawn over his arms in the process. Aya, with a look of abandon, lay his cheek on Yohji�s shoulder and sighed.

�Fine,� the redhead conceded after a long silence.

A loud yawn sounded from the couch, surprising all. Ken blinked bleary eyes at his teammates and Manx. �Please don�t tell me we have a mission.� Manx nodded. �Well, damn,� was all Ken said. Omi lightly touched his face with one hand, almost as if soothing him.

�I�m not quite sure what to do, though, if all four of you are out of commission....� Manx waved the files for emphasis. �You guys are the only ones in Kritiker that are capable of a mission like this.� She sighed. �Maybe we�ll just have to skip this one.�

�Give me a break, Manx. If we can�t do it, there has GOT to be a group of assassins-for-hire in Tokyo that are as good as we are.� Ken looked at for Omi for approval, then something dawned on them at the same time. They both looked to Aya, who was looking irritated, and it was obvious he knew what they were thinking. Manx was still lost. She looked to Yohji.

The blonde was still for a long moment. Then, his face twisted with unfortunate realization. �Awe, HELL no!�

~*~*~*~

Schuldig flopped down into one of the chairs in Brad Crawford�s office with an exasperated sigh. �I am so BORED. We haven�t had a job in over a month. If we didn�t get paid so damn well, we would have already died of starvation.� The German dramatically fell out of the chair sideways, landing on his back on the floor. �I�m dying, Bradley. Will you give me mouth-to-mouth?�

�Moron,� Crawford grumbled in English. �Just calm down. I�ll look for something.� Crawford had to push his glasses up a little when he titled his head down to look at the computer screen again.

Schuldig got up off the floor, crossing the room to where Crawford sat. He dropped himself in Crawford�s lap, much to the surprise of the American. �Play with me, Bradley? Please? I wanna play!� Schuldig squirmed impatiently on Crawford�s lap. The Oracle rolled his eyes.

�Schuldig, I�m trying to work,� he growled, motioning to the computer screen.

Schuldig sighed, not moving, but looking defeated. �You have no idea how boring it is pent up like this in the house all day. At this point, I�d even take orders from Weiss, just because it would be something to do.�

Crawford got an amused smile on his face. �You may get your chance.� As if in after-thought, he added, �Answer the phone.�

A moment later the phone rang. Schuldig blinked once before picking it up on the second ring. �Moshi, moshi?� He couldn�t imagine who it would be. After all, Nagi hadn�t left the house that day, and Farfarello should have been in his straitjacket in the basement.

�Schuldig? It�s Siberian,� Hidaka Ken�s voice came over the phone. Schuldig almost fell off Crawford�s lap in surprise. �We... Weiss would like to hire Shwartz. I assume I should speak with Crawford?� He sounded absolutely serious. Schuldig was completely confused.

�Why would you want to hire us?� the German asked.

�We�re all... we have the flu, to tell you the truth. We just can�t fulfill one of our missions in this state,� Ken admitted, sounding very sheepish. �Don�t worry, we�ll pay you plenty.�

�Um... yeah, we�ll take the job,� Schuldig agreed, a smile forming on his face. �Where should we meet you?� At this point, Crawford was looking at him with great interest. The Oracle had one eyebrow gently raised. He looked rather amused, actually. He must have predicted that this would happen.

�At the shop,� Ken replied. �Whenever you can come over is fine. We�re not going anywhere fast.� Schuldig could almost hear Ken sweat drop on the other end of the phone. �Thanks,� he added in after thought.

�We�ll be right over. Bye, kitten,� Schuldig promised as he hung up the phone. �Well, we got a job.�

�You get the crazy and the little one, I�m gonna call our limo,� Crawford said with just a hint of amusement.

�Aa.� Schuldig frowned. He really had to be careful what he wished for.

~*~*~*~

Ken was in the kitchen, making cocoa for himself and Omi when there was an innocent knock on the tin of the closed gates of the shop. Ken stumbled out into the shop, trying hard to keep his light-headed affliction from impeding him. He opened the door, and Shwartz came under, as was to be expected. �Hey, you�re earlier than I thought you would be,� Ken said in the best friendly tone he could muster. Especially for his once-enemies.

�Easy traffic day,� Crawford explained. �What is the job, Siberian?�

�Cutting right to the chase?� Ken laughed quietly. �Come downstairs with me, we�ll show you the mission.� Ken led them down the stairs into the mission room, grabbing the mugs of cocoa before he went. Downstairs, Yohji was lying on the far couch while Omi was now sitting on the couch in the middle of the room. Aya was in the recliner, reclining, and he sneezed right as the five entered the room. Manx had long-since left.

Nagi�s eyes widened in despair. �Tsukiono-sempai!� He exclaimed, pushing past Ken to check on Omi. �Are you okay, Tsukiono-sempai?� Nagi asked with his voice spilling worry. Ken was forced to smile. Since they started going to the same school, Nagi and Omi had become friends, but Omi was still an upperclassman, so Nagi was careful how he addressed him. Admittedly, Ken had grown fond of Schuldig�s occasional stops at the flower shop out of boredom. God forbid they actually become friends.

�Don�t worry, Naoe-kun,� Omi assured with a bright smile. �Thanks for coming.� Omi looked over Nagi�s shoulder at Ken who still had a goofy smile on his face. Omi smiled back at him fondly, melting Ken�s tired little heart. Ken plopped down on the couch next to Omi and handed him his cocoa. �Thanks, Ken-kun,� Omi murmured, kissing Ken�s cheek. Ken took Omi under his arm, sipping his own hot chocolate. He glanced over at Nagi who was bristling. What was his problem, anyway?

�Awe, kittens in love....� Schuldig whispered with absolutely nothing nice about his voice. It sounded like he had found a new plaything.

�Mastermind...please.� Crawford pointed to the wall Ken always thought of as �Aya�s wall�. It was, after all, where Aya always stood when they received their missions. Schuldig grumbled, but proceeded over to the place he was assigned to.

�Yohji, start the tabe,� Aya ordered, sneezing again. He grumbled and slid further into the recliner, pulling the comforter up to his chin in the process. His violet eyes threatened to close and stay closed, but he kept snapping back to attention, only for his eyes to drift slowly shut again.

Yohji yawned and made a big deal of stretching before he stood and went to the projector. Ken noted with a great deal of amusement that Yohji�s sweats were hung low off his hips, exposing a great deal more flesh than the average person would think to expose when wearing sweats. Leave it to Yohji. �Weiss,� Persia�s voice said, grabbing the attention of all. �You have a mission.�

~*~*~*~

No, Schuldig did not pay attention to the mission orders. What did he care? Any information he needed beyond the orders Crawford gave him specifically, he could take from the mind of any of the other seven men in the room. For this very reason, he took the time to dab a little into the minds of everyone in the room.

Ken, bless his little soul, was actually paying attention to the tape, even though it was not the first time he�d seen it. But, Schuldig could feel that Omi was increasingly becoming more and more of a distraction, pulling Ken�s attention finally to the way the blonde mindlessly sipped cocoa while he watched. Schuldig could tell it wasn�t as mindless as Ken thought, though. Omi was deliberately using everything he could think of to distract himself so he didn�t get lost in the moment with Ken. Ah, young love; ain�t it the sweetest thing?

Schuldig shifted from them to Nagi and almost laughed out loud. Nagi hadn�t heard one word of the recording. The little psychic was too busy bristling over everything Ken and Omi were doing. When Omi adjusted to wrap himself around Ken�s chest more, Nagi considered blowing the Little Cat sky high. Schuldig had always felt Nagi�s feelings were very obvious, but it was so funny how oblivious Ken and Omi were, all the same. Well, maybe Omi was starting to catch on, but dear unobservant Ken would never know unless someone told him. That would create a scene to remember, too. Schuldig logged that away in his �future mischief� file.

Schuldig didn�t bother with Farfarello. Probing his thoughts was like going to an abandoned amusement park at night and having all the rides suddenly switch on: everyone thinks it�s creepy.

So, Schuldig moved on to Yohji who was now almost flopped over the projector in exhaustion. His dark blonde hair was splayed over the black of the projector in the most amusing way. Schuldig smiled. He didn�t have to probe Yohji�s thoughts to know what was on his mind. But, he ventured in anyway, and almost drove himself crazy after ten seconds. The blonde was practically chanting the name �Aya� in his mind, his mental voice buzzing with worry. Though it was more extreme than Schuldig had expected, it was, none-the-less, what he�d anticipated.

Schuldig turned to Aya, amused to see what the redhead�s mind would be like in contrast to his blonde-bombshell admirer. Aya�s thoughts, unlike his words, were crisp and clear. He was uttering out death threats directed at nothing in particular; though realistically, most likely about his physical condition. Then, one thought broke through his strain of death threats. He suddenly, inexplicably, began to mutter to himself about Yohji and how stupid the blonde was. Schuldig almost fell over. Aya�s mind was flashing with images of Yohji holding him close to help keep him warm while stroking his hair. Aya had a crush on Yohji. That was classic, to say the least.

Schuldig then made the biggest most dangerous leap of faith of them all. He probed Crawford�s mind, hoping the other man wouldn�t notice. Almost instantly, he was proved wrong. //Schuldig, get out of my mind. You haven�t been paying attention, have you?//

::How could I, Braddy-poo? There are so many minds here to taste....::

//Don�t call me that. Anyway, Schuldig, we came here to get paid, not to screw with Weiss. Do you want to go home?//

::Sorry, Braddy-kins. I�ll be more attentive in the future.::

�So, let me get this straight,� Crawford was suddenly saying aloud, shutting Schuldig abruptly out of his mind. �The problem is that your cover was almost blown, so you need to pass off the flower shop as a normal place. Unfortunately, you are the only team in Kritiker that is so well versed in flowers, so you were going to have to disguise yourselves in order to complete this mission. Instead, we are going to fill in for you, even though we know jack shit about gardening?� Weiss nodded, though Ken was the only one who bothered to look at Crawford. Crawford�s eye twitched. �How are we going to be of any help?�

�Crawford�s right,� Nagi agreed. �All I can really do is float things and blow things up.� That won him a funny look from the rest of the room. �What? It�s true!�

Aya looked darkly at the members of Shwartz. �Shooldeh can read minds. He can take the info�mation you need out ub our minds.� Aya then sneezed again, making noises that resembled curses.

Omi smiled sadly. �What Aya means is: Schuldig can take the information you might need out of our minds. Farfarello can hang out down here with us so he doesn�t frighten the patrons. Nagi will be good at working in the shop because he can, as he put it, �float things�, and it will be easy for him to move the heavy plants. Crawford, I�m sure, will want to be at the cash register. We thought this would work out perfectly for the prying eyes trying to blow our cover.�

�Do we know when they�re coming?� Crawford inquired.

�Sometime tomorrow, we calculated,� Omi replied seriously. �Sundays this time of the year are very busy, so it would be a good time to just slip in. We�d appreciate it if you helped us clean up down here a little, you know, hide the mission stuff. Ken-kun can show you how to open shop, too.� Omi snuggled into Ken. �Isn�t that right, Ken-kun?� The blonde proceeded to giggle like a schoolgirl, getting a very mixed, but on average amused response from the rest of the room.

�Yeah, I�ll show Schuldig and Crawford the ropes, if you want to help Nagi and Farfarello with the downstairs?� Ken looked right at Omi, much more serious than the young bishonen. Omi nodded.

�I�ll put Aya back to bed,� Yohji suggested, finally standing away from the projector. He shot Schuldig a wicked smile. �You know what really sucks, though, about being sick? I mean, more than this whole fucked up mission thing and not getting to see my fangirls....� Yohji made his way across the room, gently taking Aya�s hand. The latter glared furiously, but he was blushing a little all the same. Yohji grinned, this time directed at Ken. �No sex,� he finally explained. This won a laugh out of everyone but the two team leaders. Well, and Farfarello�s laugh wasn�t a very sane one....

�Yohji, you weren�t getting sex anyway,� Omi said teasingly. More laughter erupted, but only because it was true. Schuldig had heard from Ken on one of his random visits to the shop that Yohji was �waiting for someone�, even though he wouldn�t say whom. Of course, Schuldig had a pretty good idea who it was, if only by the blonde�s actions that night.

�I choose to be celibate,� Yohji said, his grin never faltering. He looked back to Aya, gently drawing the younger man out of the chair and against his thin frame. �Ne, Aya? Are you going to be able to walk, or do I have to carry you?�

Aya snarled. �Ib fine. I can walk on my obe.� Aya took one step away from Yohji, and instantly began to crumple to the floor. Yohji caught him before he could fully collapse, but the poor guy was horribly unhappy about it. �Yohji, let go ub me!� Aya pouted helplessly as Yohji only held him closer. �Yohji... you don hab to do thith fo me.� Aya sounded uncharacteristically mellow.

�Aya, I want to take care of you,� Yohji whispered in reply, holding Aya a little closer. Aya blushed profusely; swallowing like it was a difficult function.

�Awe,� Schuldig said in the same tone he�d used the last time he spoke aloud. �Kittens in denial.� A moment after he said it, Crawford took him by the collar, toting him up the stairs with the amused Hidaka Ken following in their wake. Schuldig, at least, got the brief pleasure of seeing Aya try to push Yohji away in surprise only to collapse at his feet and have to be carried back to bed by the blonde. Ah, it was life�s simplest pleasure that made everything worthwhile for Schuldig.

~*~ To Be Continued~*~