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Welcome to Sweety's Fun Page |
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Home |
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The wall, part Ten |
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The wall, part TenWhile a psychatrist parked his car close to one of the hospital where he works, he noticed a small hole on the wall, and suddenly heard voices behind the wall saying loudly;" Nine, OH OH Nine, OH OH Nine, OH OH Nine,......" Not being able to see what was going on beyond that wall , he went to look through the hole. Just as he put his eye there, a finger,from the other side of the wall, went through his eye ball and blinded him, and the voices started to say ;" Ten OH OH, Ten OH OH, Ten OH OH..... |
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Doesn't taste good |
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Two drunk people started arguing about a piece of shit they found on the ground. The first one tasted it and said: "It's honey".The second tasted and said:"No, it's ketch up". The second tasted again and said "No no, it's honny", and went arguing for a while. A guy was passing by, when one of the two drunk stopped him and asked him : "Exuse me , is this thing on the ground honny or ketch up?". The guy said: " It's a piece of shit", so the two drunk guys said" Oh my god, we are lucky we didn't step over it." |
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The clever turtle
Four turtles had a business travel from Algeria to Tunisia, but it was absolutely impossible that they all leave at the same time,so they chose the youngest to go for the mission.Before leaving, the young turtle insisted that they don't open the food supply until it comes back.They agreed, but gave it an ultimatum of two years to go and comeback from Tunisia. Then the turtle left.....After two years the turtles started waiting for it.Two months followed, but it didn't show up.Two of the turtles started complaining that they were hungry, that the dead line was over, and they wanted to open the food supply.Fortunately, The older turtle calmed, and convinced them to wait three more months after which they can open the bags.Two months after, no turtle back.The turtles, hungry, went to open the bags. As they started opening, the fourth turtle jumped over a closer rock, and with an angry voice said:" I knew you were going to open the bags when I leave me, that's why I didn't go." |
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Slap For Money |
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There were two friends in a movie theater,and a bald was sitting in the front seat.Having a devilish idea, one of the guys said to the other;"If you slap this bald guy in his head I'll give you 10 bucks."Tempted buy the money, the guy slapped the bald.Shocked, the bald stood up and turned to the guy.Acting as if he was surprise, the slapper guy said to the bald;" Ohhhh Mourad, how are you?...oh oh, sorry, I thought you were a friend of mine- Mourad- I'm sorry." The bald forgave and sat down. The guy got his ten bucks, but this time, the gambler offered thirty bucks if he slapped the blad again. After a little hesitation, the slapper went for it, and slapped the guy again.The bald guy turned to the slapper, but for the second time, the slapper said; "Mourad how...oh sorry, you really look like a friend of mine." Interupting that acting, the bald said with an angry voice; " I'm not Mourad, I'm not your friend, and this is the last time I forgive this." Mad, the bald moved to a farther seat in the movie theatre.The gambler guy gave the slapper his thirty bucks, and for the third time said: " If you find him and slap him now, I'll give you 50 bucks." The slapper refused to take that risk, but the guy offered him 100 bucks, so he accepted. The slapper went among the seats trying not to disturb people .He got to the bald seat and slapped in his head.When the bald turned to him, the slapper said "Oh Mourad you are sitting here, and I have been there slapping a poor guy who looks like you." |
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Shalli |
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This is a stupid governor, let's call him "Shalli". Shalli was looking for a guy who wastelling jokes about shalli and making fun of him among his people. SHalli caught the joker in a street. While taking him to jail, the "Joker" said " Ok! Sir, I am going to jail, but let me just buy a pack of cigarettes. So Shalli let him go. The guy fled. Two months later Shalli caught him again. As he was taking him to jail - again - the guy asked him to let him go get a pack of cigarettes, again. So, the joker ran away , again. After two more months, Shalli caught the joker, again. When taking him to jail, again, the joker asked Shalli, again, if he could let him get a pack of cigarettes. This time Shalli was smarter, he told him " No way, this time you stay here, I get the cigarettes for you." |
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E.S.L. |
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This is an American girl who has an Algerian boy friend who was learning English. She asked him " How are you feeling ?" He answered " I'm filling the blanks." |
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Barbie |
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A man forgot his daughter's birthday and breathlessly runs into the nearest Toys Store. "Can I help you sir?" "Yes, it's my daughter's birthday and I have no idea what to buy for her" "How about a Barbie doll, we have "Malibu Barbie" -$19.95, "Stewardess Barbie"-$19.95, and oh here's one, Divorced Barbie" she's $265.00" "$265?!?!? Why is divorced Barbie two hundred and sixty five dollars?" "Because sir, Divorced Barbie comes withKen's House, Ken's car, all of Ken's money..." |
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Get me a Blanket |
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A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the samesleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both go to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night the woman leans over, wakes the man and says, " I'm sorry to bother you |
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but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket." The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, " I've got a better idea just for tonight, let's pretend we're married." The woman thinks for a moment, then replies, " Why not, ", she giggles. " Great!", he replies, " Get your own damn blanket!" |
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You've Got Mail |
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As you are receiving my note by e-mail, it's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:
Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
Your Loving Husband
PS. Sure is hot down here. |
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Chinese vs Jewish |
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A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a chinese man and punches him in the face. " Owch! " the Chinese man says. " What was that for?" " That was for Pearl Harbor,"the Jewish man says. "But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?" And the Jewish man sits back down. Then, the Chinese guy walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face. "Owch!" the Jewish man says. " What was that for?" " That was for the Titanic, " the Chinese man says. "But that was an iceberg!" "Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference? " |
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Alligators |
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Once, there was a millionaire who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, he decides to throw a huge party, and during the party, he announces, " My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here." I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!" As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large SPLASH!! There was one guy in the pool swimming with all he could...the crowd cheered him on as he kept stroking. Finally, he made it to the other side unharmed. The millionaire was impressed. He said, " My boy that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain...Which do you want, my daughter or the one million dollars?"
The guy says, "listen, I don't want your money! And I don't want your daughter! I want the person who pushed me in that water!! |
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