A Spirit, An Energy, The Air
I come to her in her dreams. I don't think she realizes it's really me though. She treats me like her hopeful hallucination. Even greets me with the words, "You're just a dream, aren't you?" I haven't the heart to tell her no. Always so happy or sad or angry to see me. But I have gotten closer to her each and every time. With every visit our bond becomes closer. Sometimes I can even feel her breath on my skin. It's so close, it's almost physical.
This must be the twentieth time I've come to her. I never visit more than twice a week. It's not good for her mentally when I show up too often, and I can't be selfish about her mind. I hover by the bed watching her calm expression taint with remembrance.
She stirs and murmurs, "Goku-san..."
She can tell when I'm nearby, like now. I can't wait to talk to her again, it's been nearly a week since I saw her last. Even just to watch her sleep. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Kami, are they right. Our bond is closer than ever. More so than when I was alive. But this time, I don't just want to be in her mind. I need her and love her so much now... because I can't have her.
I lean in and brush her satiny black hair from her face into the pool of it on her pillow. I think she says my name again and her eyes flutter behind light lids. They slowly open to focus on the opaque shadow I make on her against the star-and-moon light. Those liquid-black eyes hold me captive for all time. Her tears well up.
"Goku-sama." Her reverence for me is so great it's almost frightening. She blinks away tears as she thinks she understands the situation. "You're just a dream, aren't you?"
I nod quietly and kneel by her side, next to the bed. A sad smile plays on her lips as she puts her slender, strong arms around my neck. I grin. I grin because she misses me. I grin because I miss her. I grin because, for once, the tie has grown tight enough for me to feel the gentle weight of her arms across my shoulders.
She suddenly holds me so hard to the point where I know it must hurt her. I can feel her stiffen as she cries, "I can really feel you this time."
I nod again and climb into bed with her. She props herself against the headboard and stares into my eyes. Her own dancing so incredibly joyfully. She reaches to touch me hesitantly. Like she doesn't want to ruin this. I assure her by taking her hand and intertwining our fingers. Her velvet skin is a texture I've ached for for months now. She closes her eyes and tears stream down her gentle, round face. She opens them again.
"Goku-san... say something."
But I cannot, of course. I am solely a ghost, and not matter how strong the bond, a spirit has no real voice. But I thank every deity there ever was for the gift of telepathy.
I speak to her mind, moving my mouth in sync, I love you.
"Oh, but you say that every night," her coming tears make her eyes sparkle in a way that hurts me deeply. "Say something new." Her tone is so pleading. My Chichi is not one to plead. She will argue, yell and fight, but rarely ever plead. I must do this for her.
I want you, I say, most compassionate and gentle tones.
She gazes into me again. Her eyes reflected in my essence. She seems to be thinking very hard on this 'something new'. "Alright," she hums before placing her lips lightly on mine.
I close mine with a flutter and vibrate like a tuning fork. I can feel my pulse coming to life for something I've wanted in so long. So many years I spent focusing on my new self-appointed duties and not the ones I first chose.
I put my arms around her little waist. I have Chichi. My Chichi. I have her for all time. I have her all night. She is all mine for this one night, and I am all hers. But for this night only. The very last I am allowed by The Powers That Be. So I make it most worth it.
Before dawn paints the horizon, I let her slip from my arms, whispering to her, Don't ever forget me.
"I couldn't begin to try," she mumbles, a smile decorating her face.
I haven't seen her sleep this well since before Cell. I shift my hands from her shoulders to her stomach and touch her with a soft warm glow. I float past the bed, but the pain doesn't drag me like I thought it would. I may be loosing her, but it's good for her to move on. In any case, I have given her something to remember me by for all time. I must give her some hint.
Name him what he was conceived by... I whisper into her mind as I melt into sunrise's light, ...kokoro (a spirit)... genki (an engery)... Goten (the air)...
She seems to agree.
The End