Chapter 1
Introduction
My name is Andy. I’m a native of Hong Kong. My
family and I moved to the United States, in 1996,
to the city of Vancouver, WA. We moved to the U.S.
because my father got scammed by his business partner
with a Chinese restaurant. My dad became a cook when he
was 11 years old. He was an excellent cook at a famous
hotel. I know that his dream is to have another restaurant of
his own. Since the scam, I’ve always had a wish that one
day I would buy a new restaurant for my father. This was
the main reason that I went to college, where I could learn
how to make money in the fast lane life of an American. In
turn, I got corrupted by American culture, turning me into a
little hustler in an Asian gang. This is the true story about
how I got related to Paul Alxx radio station and
entertainment business. This is the true story of how he
messed up my whole life.
I’ll start from the 1997 fall quarter when I attended
Clark College in Vancouver. I was majoring in art and
design. I remember that year, when I was going to school,
there weren’t many Asians going to Clark College. Only
about 15 – 20 Asian students went to that school at the
time, because Vancouver was a smaller town. I was
dressing a little different because most of my clothes were
imported from my aunt in Hong Kong. But I was getting
into snowboarding and the clothing that compliments it,
which was becoming popular at the time. Plus I was also
learning how to snowboard when I was attending Clark and
now I love snowboarding, because I never had seen snow
in my whole life until I moved to Vancouver. I love snow
now.
At some point, I got this girl Rachael’s attention. I
remember that she was very beautiful. I remember every
time when she walked by me, she would look at me and
talk to her friend, telling her that she thinks that I am a little
cute. But I never went up to talk to her, because I was a
very shy person; I never really knew how to meet people
yet, plus my English wasn’t that good. I had only lived in
US for a few years. My English was so poor, yet just good
enough to talk to my few friends that knew me very well.
Rachael had persisted talking about me and looking at me
in the halls, but keeping her distance for almost half a year,
until one day that next spring quarter, my new American
friend, Emily and I, were chatting outside the book store of
the college. Emily is one of those nice people that I met
when I was attending Clark College. She used to work at
this book store on campus. Suddenly, I heard a beautiful
voice come up behind us. “Hi…Emily, how are you?”
Emily and I turned around and saw that it was Rachael.
I was totally surprised. My friend Emily introduced me to
Rachael. I could tell from the look in her eyes Rachael was
familiar with who I was. My English still wasn’t good at
all. I was very shy and I shook her hand and I said, “Hi, my
name is Andy, how you are doing?” That was the first time
I talked to her. I thought that it was God giving us an
opportunity to meet each other. Since Emily knew Rachael,
I asked Emily a lot of questions about Rachael. Emily said
that Rachael is the nicest person in the world. She was a
prom queen when she was in high school, and that she was
also majoring in art and drama. Everything was so good
about her, until Emily told me that she was moving to
California after spring quarter: About 50-60 days. I wasn’t
very happy about that.
In those 50-60 days, every time when I saw Rachael on
campus, I could only say “Hi” to her. It was the only word
that came to mind. I really liked Rachael, but I don’t
“mack” or “hit on”, or flirt with girls. I rarely let people
know what was on my mind, so to tell this girl how felt was
more than just difficult. At that time I was little upset about
what she had said about me and my situation, that I do have
feelings for her, but she was moving too soon. Within 50-
60 days, I thought I’d get to know her, maybe even move to
California with her. By this time, we had started a pretty
deep relationship, but I still had a lack of knowledge of
American culture. It was all still pretty strange to me. So
eventually I decided that I should let it go. I’d see her
outside the library windows and always catch her coming
out from her class at the science building in the afternoons.
Most of the time I would see her come out and chat with a
little girl with blonde curly hair. I was going to the library
and watching Rachael come out from her class everyday
until finally, Rachael was gone and the spring quarter was
over. I guess that was all I had to say about Rachael.
Chapter 2
Summer, 1998
I didn’t go to school in summer 1998. I was just working
at a Bento restaurant in Vancouver and a gas station
owned by my friend, David. Most of the time, I was still
thinking about Rachael. It was about a week before I went
back to Clark College to register for the full quarter.
I used to listen to music when I went to sleep. I’d hit the
repeat button, and I’d listen to one song over and over. It
was kind of a waste of electricity, but that was my habit.
That one night I chose a song, “I Don’t Want to Miss a
Thing”. I had a sweet and rare dream that I never had and
that is the reason I can remember so well…
I was dreaming of that little, curly, blonde haired
American girl that always came out from Rachael’s science
class. I was dreaming that I was holding that girl at school,
outside the Gassier Hall. I was talking to her in Chinese and
she said that she couldn’t understand anything I was saying,
and than she said it doesn’t really matter and then she
kissed me on the lips and we were kissing in the dream
until my alarm clock woke me up…
When I woke up, I was thinking and thinking over and
over again, How come I’m dreaming about her, the curly,
blonde haired American girl that I don’t even know at all?
Then, about a week later, I went back to Clark to register
for my fall quarter classes. I was in line by the registration
office in Gaisser hall and I was looking outside the book
store and I was still thinking about that day, the first time
Emily and I were chatting outside the book store, and how I
met Rachael.
All of the sudden I heard a little voice from the security
office across from me. A happy little voice saying
something like, “He is back…he is back… I heard that he is
really nice and he’s got good style, and he is not a player!”
It was someone talking to her co-worker in the security
office. I glanced at the security office and it was the little,
curly, blonde haired American girl and she was working at
the campus security office as a student aid. I was totally
surprised about what I heard and I was thinking that those
must be Rachael’s words, because she used to tell all her
friends about me.
The blonde haired American girl kept looking at me in
the security office when I was in line but I just pretended
not to notice because I was still too shy to look at her. I was
also thinking about my dream, that I couldn’t believe that I
saw her. I was thinking that I might have some sort of
chance to get to know her. So I decided to talk to her and
ask her out. I went back to Clark College the next day at
noon. I found her talking to the Clark College security
office supervisor, Victor outside the bookstore in Gassier
hall. I was so happy to see her, so I went up and talked to
Victor when he was talking to that blonde haired girl.
“Excuse me. Can I talk to her for a minute?”
“Sure,” he said.
I looked at the blonde girl. I asked her if “I could have
lunch or dinner with you?”
“Sorry,” she said. “I don’t go out with people that I
don’t know.”
I asked her, “If you won’t go out with me, how can you
get to know me?”
“I think that she is already made up her mind that she is
not interested,” said Victor.
“OK,” I said. “Thank you for your time. It was nice
talking to you”
When I was walking to my car, I saw a couple friends
of mine that work at the college book store, Stephanie and
MaryAnn. I told them what was happening, that I tried to
ask a girl out, but I got dissed, and they were all curious
and asked me who she was, because they knew that I don’t
usually ask girls out. I told them that she had curly blonde
hair, and she worked at the security office. That was the
best info I could offer. Stephanie told me that she knew the
girl and that her name was Jenny. She was very nice and
really religious, she said. She said that she would talk to
Jenny and tell her that I am a really nice guy as well. I said,
“Sure, please do. A lot of people get the wrong ideas about
me.”
About two weeks later, Clark’s 1998 fall quarter
started. It was September. One of the most beautiful
mornings I witnessed was when I had just got back to
school. I was walking to my math class, and the weather
was just perfect. The sky was blue and there were a few
clouds dotting its space. On the way, I saw Jenny was
outside the art building. She was sweating, like she just got
back from running or PE class. I went up to her even
though I was still somewhat shy.
I asked Jenny, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
“You’re talking to me right now,” she said.
I said, “Well, can I talk to you then?”
“SURE!” It was a very awkward beginning to a
conversation, especially for me.
Then I shook her hand and introduced myself. I told her
to excuse my deep accent; that I wasn’t from around here.
I told her, “I just wanted to say sorry, I didn’t mean to
ask you out like that, and I hope that you didn’t get the
wrong impression about me. I don’t do this too often.”
“I know…I know.”
“How do you know?” I was thinking that it must’ve
been Rachael that told her something about me.
“No…I don’t know.” I thought that it was really cute,
how she reacted as she said that.
“When are you going to graduate and get out of this
place?” I asked. I was trying to make sure she was going to
be around here for awhile. Just so I didn’t pull another
Rachael.
“About 4 or 5 more quarters, and I can’t wait to get it
done. But, I have to go change before class starts. See you
later?”
“O.K,” I said. “I hope that I will talk to you soon. See
you around.”
This is how we ended our conversation. That was our
first time chatting and that was also my first time that I met
a girl by my-self since that I move to U.S. I mean I met
some people before but all of them were my friends, or
were introduced to me.
Since then, every time I see her on campus, I said hi to
her.
My birthday was coming up at the end of the October I
was about to turn 21. My birthday wish was to ask Jenny
out. So, since I was still shy, I had one of my Asian friends,
David talk to one of the campus security girl that she knew
to help me ask Jenny to go out with me.
I was waiting for Jenny by the security office in Gassier
hall. Finally she showed up and I went up to her, and I
hadn’t even opened my mouth to ask her yet, and she said
that she was working and she had to go. I suspected that
probably her co-worker already had told her that I was
going to ask her out for my birthday and she just wasn’t
interested…
So I didn’t get a chance to ask Jenny.
So I went home.
Chapter 3
My 21st Birthday
My birthday that night was one of the most life
changing nights. One of my friends that I met
from high school came to my house and took me out. His
name was Oulun; he was half Chinese and half Laotian.
Oulun was one of my good friends that used to back me up
when I was in high school. In all truth, Oulun was a
gangster. He was in one of the Asian gangs from Portland,
which were originally from California, mainly L.A. He was
a locally famous gangster as far as Northwest Asian gangs
go, and he also worked for a Chinese mafia and a lot of
Asians knew him from around the area. Several years
before, his “Homeboy” shot someone at his birthday party,
and this made him that much more famous in the Asian
hood. On my 21st birthday, he promised that he would be
the first person to take me out to the bar and night clubs,
and I promised him that I would. So we went out, and from
there, I didn’t come back the same person. Since Jenny
didn’t want to go out with me for my birthday…
First, Oulun took me to one of the biggest Chinese
restaurants in Portland to eat. I remember that night, when
we got out of the car outside the parking lot, there was a
female bartender talking to some cowboy. Oulun knew the
bartender and had her introduce the cowboy to Oulun and
me. Everything was ok until I opened my mouth to
introduce my-self. “How are you doing? My name is
Andy.” The cowboy changed his expression almost
immediately and said something about how he was sorry
my friend just got beat up by some Asian the other night at
the bar, and he tried to pull his pocket knife out about 6
inches long. I really didn’t understand what he was talking
about, but I got the point. I believe part of the reason he got
mad was because I had a deep voice, and I also think he
was on drugs. So then I pulled my 91/2 inch knife out of
my pocket. I thought that I might have had to kill someone
to protect myself on my birthday, but Oulun and the
bartender were stopping the cowboy that tried to fight me. I
just kind of walked away and into the restaurant. I didn’t
want to hurt anyone for my birthday.
When Oulun and I got in the restaurant, there were
many Asians. That night was my first time meeting his
Chinese Mafia boss and some of the gangster brothers. The
boss’s name was Ken, but he liked people to call him a Cat.
The first thing that came out from his mouth was that,
“Oulun always talk about you.” I also believe that night
was the night Oulun wanted to get me in this Chinese mafia
gang. Oulun introduced me to everybody in his. That night
I met a lot of different people and we had a wonderful
Chinese seafood dinner and went to couple different clubs
and strip bars in Portland. Cat and Oulun even tried to buy
me a stripper for my birthday that night, but I didn’t take
her. The only thing in my head was Jenny. I wasn’t very
happy about her not going out with me for my birthday.
But as the real party began, Cat and Oulun told me
about this Sin Hu mafia gang. Back in the old days, this
Chinese mafia gang had a little power in the 70S and 80s
around Portland. I heard that they used to sell guns and
drugs to other Asian gangs when they first move here to the
Portland area from the big cites. Cat also owned a
restaurant and a bar in Wilsonville, OR. To some of the
older Chinese restaurant owners in Portland, downtown
used to be a mafia hangout.
I thought about this a lot that night when I was meeting
them. I was thinking that I didn’t see much future with my
terrible English. I was going Clark College, and the class
had been really hard for me. Part of the reason I was going
there was because I just wished I could learn more English.
I wasn’t sure what I really wanted to do for my future and I
was getting bad grades; my GPA was very low. I really
didn’t know how long I could hang in there. I always felt
stupid in college. I started thinking that I needed to be gutsy
and have some real balls to make money, and that I could
get it from the Sin Hu gang. I thought that it could be my
chance to make some fast money to buy a restaurant for my
father. Our family wasn’t ever too wealthy. I had seen my
family struggle because of money problems. This was
going to be payback for my father. I was starting to think
that I should join in this Sin Hu gang, just for a couple
years, until I had enough money to buy my father a
restaurant. I was hoping that I could make some fast money
soon. I also hoped that I could get Cat to trust me enough to
get a connection to big cities like in California; San
Francisco or Los Angeles where I could make some big
money. I wanted Cat’s connections.
I was still going college in the fall quarter of 1998. I
remember after my birthday that night, going to school the
next day. I walked by the security office and saw Jenny was
working over the counter. She also saw me walking by and
I heard her talking to herself. “I was hoping you would
come back.” I wasn’t sure if she was really talking to
herself or trying to let me hear it, but I was thinking that
maybe it was too soon for me to ask her out for my
birthday again. I only talked to her once, and besides, I had
only said hi to her a few times. Maybe she wanted me to
get to know her better, but I was a gangster now, and I had
to live the gangster lifestyle in an Asian hood. I was so
confused. Before my birthday, I was looking for a good girl
to teach me English, teach me more about the good U.S
culture and teach me more about the good side of America.
I was really hoping to learn from Jenny about American
culture… but my life was about to change. I knew that in a
gang, you become a gangster, and there’s nothing to
separate wrong or right, you just got to do what you got to
do to reach your goal. I am not sure if she would’ve
understood what I was trying to say, but somehow, because
I heard what Jenny said that she hoped that I will come
back. I was falling in love again.
In that fall quarter, I felt a little bit more depressed.
Maybe it was the weather or just my lifestyle, but I think it
was this whole Jenny situation. Every time I saw her, it was
like some kind of natural high, it made me feel better. I was
also hanging out with Cat and Oulun more often, making
them trust me more, trying to get them to give me some
little jobs to do in the hood. I was starting very slow, little
by little. But I had Jenny in my head all the time, and I was
moving on too slow for the Sin Hu gang. I still didn’t know
which way I should turn to, so I attended Clark College the
following winter quarter. I was still hanging in the gang on
the side. That winter quarter, I saw Jenny a little more,
usually at the security office in Gassier hall. At 1:00 pm
everyday, while she was working, I usually parked my car
outside Gassier hall and most of my Asian friends always
hung out at the cafeteria, so I always saw Jenny when I
walked by the security office. It was pretty much the only
time I ever really saw, except when I thought about her.
I remember one day in the winter, Oulun and I had a
little job to do from Cat. Every time when I got a job to do
from Oulun or Cat, I thought about Jenny even more then
usual, just because I always think about Jenny. I remember
that day, at 1:00pm when I saw jenny at Clark college
security office and I went up to talk to Jenny…that was my
second time talk to her besides just saying hi…
I said” hi…Jenny, how are you doing?
Jenny was acting alike little surprise and then she says
“hi…I am doing good…”how are you?”
I said” I am good…I am going to get little something to
eat…can I can you something?”
Then Jenny said” oh…I am OK and I am about to get
off work soon…
Then I said “ok…bye and see you later…
Then Jenny said” bye”
I believe the reason I went up to talk her at that time
because I had a job from Cat and Oulun…I didn’t know if I
will have a chance to talk to jenny or see her
again….because I might get kill or get caught by the police
one day…,
When I was during the job with my pal oulun that
night…I was none stop thinking about Jenny at the whole
time…until everything got done…and fortunately
everything was going smooth…
Most of the time, when I walked by Jenny on campus,
she would say something like, “He doesn’t mack, but he
thinks he has great style,” with an unhappy tone…I don’t
even know what “mack” means, really… and I’m just
dressing like my friends.
I am an artist at heart and I like to design things. So
because I heard what she said about me, and she seemed
unhappy about me, on the last day of winter quarter, I made
her a nice, little Christmas ball with a red rose in it. I’ve
stood by my belief that something that I make is more
special than something that I buy it at the store, because it’s
the only one in the world, and there’s no way that anybody
can buy it. I just wanted to make her happy.
I went to the security office at 1:00, but Jenny wasn’t
there. I asked her co-worker where she was, telling her that
I had a Christmas gift for Jenny. The co-worker said that
yesterday was Jenny’s last day of school for this quarter
and that she wouldn’t be there. Victor said,”Yeah…she’s
gone bro.” I also heard a voice in the back of the
registration office saying “It’s been half year and he still in
love.” That lady had always seen me saying hi to Jenny.
Now I didn’t think she would see it anymore.
Charter 4 Spring, 1999
I dropped out
the following spring quarter and focused on my
gang.
Besides doing some work for the gang every once in a
while, I stayed at home to work on my art that spring.
Every so often, my friends and I would go to Mt. Hood,
Oregon to snowboard. I enjoyed snowboarding and
thinking about Jenny. Most of the time, I would think about
what would’ve happened if Jenny and I would’ve got
together. But here I was, a little Asian mafia hoodlum,
trying to hustle for money.
In that spring quarter, I had a friend who worked at the
campus computer lab. I stopping by Clark College every
once in a while to use the computer lab to send e-mails,
visit some of my friends who were students at Clark, and
hoping that I would see Jenny.
I remember one time that I stopped by to see my friend,
Anthony. We were chatting outside the science building,
and I saw Jenny was there. She was about 15 feet away
from me. She was talking to her friend, and I’m pretty sure
they were talking about me. She was saying something
about how someone didn’t even register for the quarter, and
that they weren’t working, just doing drugs and that their
life depended on them. It sounded a lot like she was talking
about me. I was certain
From what I heard, I was wondering how she could
have known that I wasn’t working and that I didn’t register
for school. I was thinking that it must’ve been Victor from
the security office that knew something about me. They did
seem like really good friends. She was working at the
security office. I started thinking that they must’ve known
my social security number and everything, because since
I’ve lived in the U.S, I’ve found that it is not hard to find
information about someone if one knows their social
security number. I also heard that Victor used to be a
Seattle police officer, so he must’ve had some kind of
connection, he must tell Jenny everything about me that he
knows.
I was also wondering why she would think that I did
drugs all the time. I mean I did smoke weed, once in a
while, but I didn’t drink or do real hard drugs. Maybe I
look like I’m high to her all the time, which might’ve been
how I looked in a sad mood. I had been somewhat
depressed; I didn’t see much in my future, and I knew it
was stupid to not go to college. I had a better life as a
student anyway.
I was also wondering why she was saying it all so loud,
but acted like she didn’t want to let me hear it. My friend
Anthony even heard it.
Every time I had a job to do for Cat or Oulun, I would
think about Jenny. She was like an angel, flying around in
my head. It made me want to see her. I would stop by Clark
campus to see her. Another friend of mine, Michel, told me
that Jenny was working on campus during the spring
quarter at the plant service as a student aid. Michel told me
that she had worked with Jenny, and she thought she was
nice girl. But at this point, I wasn’t too sure about that. But
I never knew if was going to get caught by the police, or
get killed, and I couldn’t bare the thought of hating her in
death, so I still couldn’t stop thinking about her. Even when
I was doing a job for Cat, I would think about her. I even
bought her a bracelet with a Chinese style flower on it.
I was waiting for her to come out from the plant service
building that she worked at. She came out and I went up to
talk to her, but she looked mad and kept looking away from
me, and told me to go away. I was wondering what was
going on. I looked at her face. She was all puffy and red. I
thought she might be on her period or something, but I
didn’t know much about that stuff. So I said “Sorry…I will
go now.”
“You’re not sorry,” she said. That was my third time
trying to talk to Jenny. It was looking hopeless, but about a
week or two later, I went back to the campus’ plant service.
I had brought a little red rose and put that little Chinese
bracelet with it on her car’s windshield I thought it would
make her happy. I thought it’d be cute to see a little
American girl have a Chinese bracelet on. But really, I just
wanted to see her happy.
Charter 5 Summer, 1999
Oulun was having some trouble with law. He was being
charged for assault one, because he and Oulun beat
up someone at a bar with pool stick. We kind of stopped
the receiving money for a little bit. I was even thinking
about to going back to college for the following fall
quarter, since there wasn’t much going on in the Sin Hu
mafia gang. In those 8 months, I met lots of different
people and had seen a lot of different faces. I didn’t make
much money and all I saw was trouble. I was realizing that
Portland wasn’t such a small town like I thought, and it
seemed like nothing much was going on.
Fortunately, everything was going smooth in those 8
months. We just had a few problems. We got fucked over
in some dealing business and we had to do something about
it which almost led to a shooting. That was all I had learned
in my lesson and experience in being a little ghetto mafia
gangster.
Oulun got me and him a job at one of the American
restaurants in Vancouver, WA by the Columbia River. It
was a beachside restaurant. It was kind of my first job
where I worked with a lot of American people, since I
moved to the U.S. I was a very quiet guy most the time. I
only talked to Oulun at work. I thought, only a good friend
of mine could understand my poor English. Some of the coworkers
had a strange feeling about me. I don’t think they
liked how quiet I was, or that I wasn’t from the U.S. I
didn’t have much common with them. I thought it was kind
of interesting.
Oulun and I were working at the summer BBQ section
as cooks at this Beach side restaurant during the blazingly
hot summer. Some of the other waiters and waitresses kind
of knew me by now, because they were going to the Clark
College. They knew about Jenny and me. I was thinking
that it must’ve been Rachael or Jenny that they knew,
because they knew a lot of people from Clark. I started
hearing my co-workers talk about Jenny and me at work. I
heard them saying something about how I was some sort of
pimp at Clark College, because I knew how to dress. A few
nice waitresses hit on me at work and I heard them saying
something about some radio station, and that I could
represent Vancouver. I had no idea what they were talking
about. But I was soon about to learn.
I worked at that restaurant for about a month. One day,
I was listening to one of the Portland radio stations. I didn’t
usually listen to this particular radio station, and most of
the time I listened to my own CD’s, but I started hearing
the radio station FM 9x.5 talk about an Asian who dressed
like a skater, going to Clark College, who’s hair and style
sounded similar to my own. Then I remembered one time, I
was going to the Vancouver shopping mall for a pair shoes.
I turned around and I was being followed by some people.
They followed me around and talked about me. I started
hearing some of my co-workers calling up the radio station
and talking about me. Sometimes, the radio station Fm 9x.5
would make fun of me for being an Asian skater.
Sometimes I heard them say that I was a gangster.
Sometimes I’d hear them say I was a player, or a pimp. I
was hearing the radio station talk about me and I was being
followed, and I was starting to get confused and little
paranoid. I didn’t like being followed and I really cared
about my privacy. So I decided to move away for a while. I
had a friend named Frank and my sister and her boyfriend
to stay with in the Seattle area. I talked to the manager at
the beachside restaurant. I told him I had to quit the job
immediately. He understood.
He told me with a smile, “Andy, you know everybody
likes you here, right?”
“I kind of know,” I said. “But I don’t play games like
that.”
The next day, I went back to Clark College to pick up
my class transcript. I saw a few students and heard them
talk about me. They had heard of me on the radio. I was so
confused; I didn’t know what was going on.
The next day, I packed up my stuff and moved to
Seattle. On the way, I was listening to the radio. I had to
listen to Fm 9x.5 again and hear it. I heard them talking
or making fun about some Asian who went to Clark
College. I listened until I got to Olympia, where the radio
station couldn’t get the signal. The U.S is so big, and
there were so many different radio stations, they could
only go to certain areas. Right about the time the signal
was changing, I heard someone like Jenny’s voice call,
sending some message that she was looking for someone
that was about to move to Seattle. I wasn’t totally sure if
that was her, but I knew that I was being followed. I was
so paranoid and confused. I’m the kind of person who
really cares about personal privacy. That is part of the
reason that I was such a quiet guy and why I didn’t know
many people around.
Chapter 6
Moving Out
The trip from Vancouver to Seattle is about 3.5 hours.
When I first moved to the Seattle area, I was living
in Redmond. I was staying with my sister and her
boyfriend, Eric. He was working for the Microsoft
Computer Company. The first couple of days when I lived
in Redmond, my sister and Eric showed me around town.
We drove to the mall and I started searching for a job.
when I was getting applications, I started seeing the same
people following me around again. It was the same people
that I saw when I was in Vancouver Mall. I was feeling so
strange. I was wondering what was going on. I was being
followed all the way from Vancouver. I wondered if maybe
it was the people from the radio station, or maybe I was just
paranoid, because why would they be following me
around?
I found an evening job in the back of a retail clothing
store as a stocker at the mall in Bellevue, WA. I also found
a second job at the Japanese sushi restaurant as a buzzer in
the Bellevue area during the afternoon. I remember the first
day I worked at the Japanese sushi restaurant, I met a very
nice waitress. Her name is Jill. Jill was half Japanese and
half American. She went to school at the University of
Washington in Seattle. I never saw a girl that adorable. I
could tell, from the first time I talked to her, she had some
kind of strange feeling about me. It was something about
her eyes, but I only thought of Jenny, because I knew that I
will still going back to Vancouver, to see Jenny. As soon as
the radio station following me thing settled down and I
wasn’t get into any trouble. They were saying something
about me being a little gangster. I was so confused. What
was going on in Vancouver? A few days later, while I was
working at the Japanese restaurant, I saw the same people
again, the same ones that were following me in the mall.
They were talking about what I was doing at my sister’s
apartments and what kind of music that I was listening to,
saying nasty things about me. They said something about
Jenny. It sounded like one of them was a movie director.
They were talking about how they were going to make a
movie, that they were watching me at work the whole time.
Why was it me they want to make a movie about? Why
would they choose me? There was nothing special about
me at all.
While I was on my half hour dinner break, working
evenings at the clothes store in the mall, I would walk
around. I saw the same people following me around. It was
like this for the whole week. I remember one day I didn’t
have to work, and I was at my sister’s apartment, watching
MTV. I thought there were people talking to me through
the TV. It was snowDog, Dr. J and Mr. Cube talking to me,
saying something. “Andy, welcome to Hollywood. LBC,
fool, where it is all about the hood. We want you to be a
rapper. You have an unusual tone. We like your style. You
can represent your home town, Vancouver, WA.” They
were saying a lot of things to try to get me to hear it and
said something about how I always carry my 380 pistol
around. They said I always play with it and it is hard for
them to talk to me, that they didn’t want to get shot. I kept
changing the channel, but it was still the same picture, the
same channel. I got even more confused. What the hell was
going on? They must have had some kind of spy equipment
at my house… like some sort of a spy camera or a
microphone somewhere in my sister’s apartment. They
must have had something that could change my TV
frequency. I was being spied on!
snowDogg and Dr.J asked me to put my pistol away
and to walk out the door of my apartment, that they would
have someone talk to me. So I really put my pistol away
and walked outside. I saw the same people that followed
me at the mall and the Japanese restaurant. They were in a
Jeep, smiling at me. Then, they just drove off. I got even
more confused and scared. I shut off the TV and sat in the
living room. I was thinking for a long, long time. I thought,
Holy shit…There must be spy equipment going on right
now. And I am being followed. I cared about my personal
privacy, but I was losing my privacy. I started yelling
around the apartment, saying, “I don’t give a fuck if I can
be famous. Leave me the fuck alone with all this stupid spy
equipment.” I was wishing I could see Jenny. I didn’t want
to be famous. I wanted my normal life back. I was very
upset about it.
The next day, I talked to the managers at both jobs
about getting a day off due to some emergency. I didn’t tell
them what was really going on. I didn’t want people to
think I was insane or anything. I drove back to Vancouver
the next day. I went to Clark College and tried to look for
Jenny. Eventually, I found her, but I didn’t know what to
say. Everything I was going through was so crazy
sounding. I wasn’t sure what was really going on with the
radio station. Was it real, or was I just tripping out? Finally,
I said, “Jenny…” but that was it.
“What?” she asked. Nothing could come out of my
mouth. I wasn’t sure if I should’ve asked her about the
radio station. I wanted to know if she was the one who
called, but I didn’t want her to think that I was insane.
Eventually, I asked,”How come you didn’t want to go
out with me?”
“That’s my privilege.”
I was feeling scared. I was still too shy to talk to her.
“Sorry, I’ll let you go.” I walked to my car and went to my
parent’s house. I wrote a letter to give to Jenny.
Jenny,
I am sorry that I really didn’t know how do talk to you
every time when I see you, because I have a poor English
accent. I didn’t talk to many people since my parents lost
the restaurant business until I meet you…I don’t live in
Vancouver wa anymore and now I am live in Seattle …you
are my first girl that I met by my-self…you are really
special to me… most American girl are look the same to
me, expect you…your beautiful hair look alike a angel to
me…it is like light in a dark…drove me insane
sometime…I really wish can meet you and this is my phone
number 425-123-3456. If you are not interested, I will
always think about you every 15 minutes…
Andy
I mentioned how my parents lost the restaurant business
because since then my mind had always been going crazy.
Since then, I’ve always tried to find a way to buy my father
a restaurant again, because that is my father’s dream, to
own another restaurant. I thought that I was crazy about the
radio station following me. I wasn’t sure what was going
on. Was it real, the radio station talking about me? Was I
being followed? Or was I just going crazy this whole time
since my dad lost the business?
I didn’t talk to many people for a long time after the
business was gone. I learned how hard it was to trust
someone, until I met Jenny. Jenny had some kind of energy
that helped me be friendly with everyone. I thought I was
crazy about the whole thing.
After I wrote the letter, I went back to Clark College. I
saw Jenny coming out to the parking lot. She had just
finished working in the plant service building. I drove by
her to talk to her again. I said, “Jenny. I’m sorry that I
didn’t really know how to talk to you. I don’t go to school
here any more. I am living in Seattle now.” And then I
handed her my letter. Jenny took my letter with a nice smile
and I left.
I didn’t mention anything about the radio station. I was
still unsure about what the hell was going on. I didn’t want
her to think that I was insane or something.
I went to see my family briefly before leaving back to
Seattle. I didn’t even tell them about it yet. On the way to
Seattle, I was hoping that Jenny would give me a call. I
hoped everything would work out from there.
I went back to work the next day. I was still being
followed. I was still seeing the same people at the Japanese
restaurant, following me. Every time I watched the TV
alone, I would see some actor talk to me next to
SnowDogg, Dr.J, and Mr. Cube. I was completely paranoid
and I didn’t know what to do about it.
About 10 days later, I still hadn’t received a phone call
from Jenny, but I was still being followed. I asked the
manager at my work about another day off, so I could go
back to Vancouver to find Jenny and to find out what was
really going on, or if she did call the radio station and
mention me. I was so paranoid about the radio station
following me around and putting spy equipment at my
house. So I drove back to Vancouver again, and went back
to Clark College. I went straight to the plant service that
Jenny worked at.
I went to the front counter at the plant service office
and I asked the assistant if Jenny was working right then.
“Yes, Jenny’s busy as of right now.”
I asked if “I could see her and talk to her for a minute?”
The assistance showed me down. Jenny was acting a little
surprised to see me there.
I asked her, “Did you make up rumors about me?”
Jenny was acting like she couldn’t understand what I
said at first, so I said it again. The assistant had to repeat it
to her.
“I don’t think Jenny would make up rumors about you.
She is a really nice girl. How could you accuse her of that?
I’m calling security.”
“You’re scaring me now, Andy,” Jenny.
I had a deep voice. Maybe she didn’t know what I was
saying. I talked to her only a few times. I was just so
stressed out about the radio station following me; I didn’t
know what was going on.
I turned around and saw the security guard, Kathy, who
started pushing me to get out. I didn’t get a chance to ask
Jenny if she really did call the radio station and mention
me. She was the only one I had ever heard talk about me
that way before, saying I was some sort of player or pimp. I
was trying to explain it all to Jenny, but I didn’t have a
chance. The Kathy escorted me to my car and watched me
until I left the campus. I tried talking to her. “Can I please
go back to ask Jenny just…one question…It’s very
important.” But she wouldn’t let me.
I left the campus with the most depressing feeling. I
was still wondering what was going on; with the radio
station; with Jenny. I was sort of hoping she did call Fm
9x.5, but I wanted to let her know that I wasn’t a player at
all, and she was just giving everyone the wrong impression.
I thought I was just the nice, sweet guy from Hong Kong.
That was before all this. That was the last time I talked to
Jenny, not even for a minute, and I scared her.
I left the campus and drove back to Seattle. When I got
back to work the next day, I told one of my co-workers
about being traced and followed by the radio business, that
I thought they were putting spy equipment at my sister’s
apartment. I couldn’t just shoot the spy camera down and it
was really bothering me. The co-worker told my manager
about it. That night, the manager asked me to leave from
work early. I went home to my sister’s apartment, and
found the police waiting at our apartment that night.
The police officer said, “I got a phone call from your
manager at the clothing store. He said you mentioned
something about spy equipment around you and that you
were being followed. He said that you were going to shoot
something down. You mind if I ask you a few questions?” I
told him a little bit about being followed by the radio
station. I told him I didn’t know what was going on.
Within minutes, the police were taking me to the
hospital in Kirkland, the Lake Washington hospital. They
made me spend the night in the psychological department,
A room with all the doors and windows locked up; they
wanted me to stay there until the doctor came to work and
talked to me the next morning.
I awoke early the next day morning. I felt trapped in
there. The doctor was supposed to have been there at
10.00am, but didn’t show up until 11:30am, an hour of so
much confusion. It only made me feel more insane. I was
asking the nurse if I could leave. I didn’t think I had a
problem. I was a little depressed about scaring Jenny and
not getting a chance to explain to her. I told the nurse that I
believed someone called the radio station and I was being
followed.
I got impatient, waiting for the doctor to come talk to
me. Ten minutes later, the nurse had asked me to step into
the quiet room. The quiet room had nothing, besides a
camera and a bed with a strip to restrain people to the bed. I
refused it. I was walking around the hall way watching the
fish tank. All of a sudden, there were five male nurses
coming after me and forcing me into the quiet room. I got
in a fight with five of them. We were fighting and running
around in the psychiatric department. I tried to get out, but
the door was locked. The nurse called for some back up.
They had about eight people running to drag me in. I was
being tied up on the bed. I was even more depressed and
upset.
I was being tied up and I started yelling in front of the
camera in the quiet room. Tears started coming out of my
eyes. I was thinking about Jenny. I never usually cried, but
I was very overwhelmed. I scared Jenny when I tried to talk
to her. I didn’t even get a chance to explain to her. The
radio station was spreading these rumors, and it made her
think different of me. I am nothing like that at all. I wasn’t
a player. I was only trying to see Jenny.
About 45 minutes later, the doctor finally came to see
me. I told him I was being followed by the radio station,
and about the spy equipment, that I told the manager at the
Xap store that I would “shoot down” the equipment. Now
he knew I had guns at home. So because the doctor didn’t
believe me, and because they thought I was a dangerous
person, the doctor got me transferred to a bigger hospital in
Seattle: Harbor view Mental Hospital.
I was at Harborview a week later. The doctor called the
radio station to ask if they were following me or taping me.
I thought the doctor must’ve been brain dead. If the radio
station business said they did, they’d be facing a lawsuit for
harassments and a whole lot more, so of course they
wouldn’t say whether or not they did. They said that they
didn’t mention anyone like me on the air in the past.
Then, the doctor made a phone call to Clark College to
talk to Jenny to see if she made up rumors about me on
campus or if she made phone calls to the radio station. But
of course, she said she didn’t.
I was wondering why she lied. I thought, maybe the
doctor didn’t ask her in the right way. Maybe I scared
Jenny that last time I talked to her. She thought that maybe
I should file a lawsuit against her; the same way I did the
radio station. I really didn’t know what was going on at all
anymore, and I was so very depressed that I scared Jenny.
That same day, my sister came to visit me at the
hospital. She told the doctor that she got a letter from Clark
College security office, saying that I was not allowed back
on campus. The doctor thought that I had a mental problem
and they believed that I was a dangerous person, that I
could harm someone, like when I fought the nurses.
Everything was crazy. I kept telling the doctor that I was
being followed by the radio business. He suggested that I
never go back to the Clark College again, which meant not
allowing me to see Jenny ever again. I wasn’t allowed any
more guns. They made me sign a lot of paperwork. I got
even more depressed. Never going back to Clark College to
see Jenny again, ever? It was all so overwhelming
If there was a scale from onto ten for how depressed I
was, 1 being depressed, 10 being in Bliss, I was below
zero. I couldn’t sleep for four days. I remember one night, I
was so depressed that I couldn’t breath. I felt like I couldn’t
walk. I wasn’t sure what was going on; maybe the strong
medication that they gave me at the hospital; all I knew was
it didn’t help me. I was so depressed, but I couldn’t cry,
because I was a man, and men don’t cry. I was locked up in
the Seattle mental hospital for 36 days.
My sister promised the doctor that she and her
boyfriend would take care of me and that I would stay with
them. I got released earlier because of it. I would’ve had to
stay at the hospital longer. After I got released, the Xap
store manager wouldn’t hire me again, but I was still
working at the Japanese restaurant. None of the people in
the restaurant knew that I had been in the hospital. I soon
found a new job at another outlet store in Bellevue, WA.
I was so depressed the whole time after I got out. I
remember the first night I got out from there; I started
having suicidal thoughts in my head. Every time I thought
of Jenny, knowing that I wasn’t the player she thought I
was and remembering that I scared her last time I tried to
talk to her, I felt so many strange feelings. I had such a
tortured view of myself; I couldn’t see my future without
seeing Jenny. There were so many nights I didn’t sleep in
my bed room, just slept on the sofa in the living room. I
had to have the TV on. I couldn’t sleep without it. I was
scared that I would kill myself in my sleep. It wasn’t like
me to think these thoughts. I didn’t do anything wrong, but
I couldn’t prove it, so I started thinking suicidal thoughts in
my head. There were so many nights my sister would yell
at me, “Why do you always keep the TV on and why don’t
you sleep in your own bed room and stop wasting
electricity?!” I never told her how scared I was, that I
would kill my-self. I didn’t want my family to worry about
me.
I started praying to God, even though I didn’t really
believe in god. I only believed in my gun. But I still prayed
to God, hoping I wouldn’t kill my-self, hoping that Jenny
would soon know the truth, that I didn’t mean to scare her,
that I am not a player, that she would come see me one
sweet day.
Chapter 7
The Japanese Doll
I was living in Redmond, next to Bellevue and the
Kirkland Estates, sort of a millionaire town. Most of the
time, I was just feeling very depressed and quiet. The only
thing that made me happy and part of the reason that I was
still alive was because I was working at the Japanese
restaurant. For some reason, the half Japanese, half
American girl, Jill, was very interested in me. I don’t know
why. She was always pretending to talk to her co-worker,
Elizabeth, and would always let me hear something,
something that always gave me a lot of confidence. The
things she let me hear were nice and comforting, even
though she knew I was a loser. I had never really talked to
her. She was one of the nicest girls in the world, judging
from her personality and all the nice thing she said about
me. Sometimes, she would even try to judge whether I was
a player or not. The only way she could tell was from my
style, because I still didn’t say much. I even had a customer
ask me if Jill was my girlfriend, because we both looked
cute together and Jill always looked at me when I was
cleaning table. But I was still very depressed, thinking
about my future, until one day, when Jill found out that I
liked art and design and drawing. She told Elizabeth that I
should be a computer graphic designer, that there was a
technical college around there that I could take.
That night, Eric, my sister and I went to check out this
technical college on the internet. It turned out there really
was a technical college, right by our apartment. It had a
graphic design class that I could take. I was always very
interested in graphic design, since we lived in Hong Kong.
The next quarter was starting soon, so I could go back to
school and learn a skill, for a new career; my new career.
I had been working at the Japanese restaurant for half a
year. One day, Jill was mad at me for never talking to her. I
remember my stomach was killing me, because I was so
depressed. I knew that I was hurting her feelings. I didn’t
want to let her know that I was waiting for someone else, or
that I didn’t even know if I would see her again.
My job at the outlet store was picking up shoes from
the floor department. I had been feeling more depressed
than usual. I was thinking I should’ve hooked up with Jill,
but I had the feeling that Jenny would come see me at my
work one day, that she would know that I didn’t mean to
scare her last time I talked to her, and that I’m not a player.
I really thought she would come see me one sweet day. I
mean, she did know my social security number.
The next day, when I got back to work at the Japanese
restaurant, I saw a couple people who weren’t supposed to
be scheduled to work. They thought Jill and I would hook
up that night, but just then, I decided I’d quit my job.
Everybody was wondering what the hell was going on. Jill
was very pretty, smart, educated, went to the University of
Washington and had a nice personality. But I had nothing
at all. They were wondering why I would, do this to Jill;
quit my job. Everybody was very surprised that I had made
such a quick decision like that, but I really believed that I
would see Jenny one day, and I didn’t want anybody’s
feelings to get hurt. Jill was a very nice girl that gave me an
idea for my future career that I had been crazy about my
whole life. She gave me the idea that I should be a
computer graphic designer. She would always be there to
comfort me in the hardest time in my life in this millionaire
town, a time I won’t never forget.
About a week and a half later, I found a replacement
job at a pizza restaurant in Redmond, a small time pizzeria
located downtown. I was still working part time at the
outlet store in Bellevue. Working at the pizzeria was the
first time I saw this waitress who looked like Julia Roberts.
Her name was Bridgette. I remember the first time I saw
her, she gave me a very nice smile and she kept looking at
me. She fixed her hair with her hand every time I looked at
her. I thought maybe she had had a strange feeling about
me, like she was in love with me or something. Bridgette
was one of the most interesting girls that I met in my life.
She was just like Jill, always letting me hear something,
that she liked me and gave me lots of comforts in the
millionaire town. I never really talked to her either, but just
because most of the time the only thing in my head was
Jenny. But she always came to talk to me, asking me to
teach her some Chinese. I remember one time I was taking
a break behind the restaurant and I was smoking a cigarette.
Bridgette came out and asked what I was doing.
“Smoking a cigarette on my break,” I said.
“Smoking a cigarette huh? Well…would you like to
hook up?” I pretended that I didn’t know what she was
trying to say. I walked back inside the restaurant and got
back to work. I was thinking about Jenny and hoping that
she would come see me soon, so people wouldn’t always
think I was rare.
While I was still working, I moved out of my sister’s
apartment. I found a roommate in the newspaper, and was
living in Redmond where I was starting to attend Lake
Washington Technical College. My roommate was sort of a
hippie/skater guy. This was how I started learning more
about American culture. My roommate would always try to
get me out at night to visit clubs and party and to meet
girls, but most of the time I just stayed home and tried to do
well with my homework assignments for school. I was
feeling like an artist, an energy I had never had before,
being poured onto my digital canvas. I started paying more
attention to every beautiful thing that I saw, trying to feel
the object and energy. I felt so peaceful, every second, my
breathing was so clear. In the past, I didn’t know what I
wanted out of my future; I didn’t see much of a future in
my life at all, especially being a person with English as a
second language. But now, I was totally crazy about my
future. I was realizing Seattle was a city with lots of people
who had different foreign accents, that there were many
different cultures from around the world standing right next
to me at every street corner. I didn’t feel so bad around
these people anymore. I was finding that they all liked my
little Chinese accent with my English.
I’d always hang out by my -self in downtown Seattle
and take pictures with my little back pack, rollerblading
around. But I still carried my .38 revolver pistol and my
91/2 inches pocket knife that I wasn’t legally supposed to
have. When I was released from the hospital, the doctor
forgot to take my gun and my concealed weapon permit, so
I registered for a legal firearm again. I like guns a lot. I was
meeting a lot of different nice American people everywhere
I went in Seattle. Still, every time I was enjoying my
peaceful artist lifestyle and having fun, I would wonder
where Jenny was, and how she was doing.
I had only gone back to Vancouver to see my family
once a month. I never went back to Clark, but I still drove
by. W hen I’d see my grandparents they would ask me
where my girlfriend was. “Come on, you are the only son
in our family. We really want to see you with a nice woman
and kids.” But if I talked about my grandparents, they’d
always fight and insult each other. They’d argue about who
would die first, or who would rather die first, things like
that. Whenever they argued, I’d wonder why they were
even together. I’d tell myself that they didn’t know what
they were talking about, that they shouldn’t even suggest a
life for me.
I met a lot of people working and learning in Seattle. A
few people asked me why I always looked like I had tears
in my eyes. Part of the reason was that I missed Jenny. It
was always in my head, nonstop thinking about her every
second, like a videotape that kept rewinding and playing
again and again starting on the day I met her to the whole
radio station following me and ending where I scared her. I
was still depressed about it all. The worst thing was that I
didn’t know if I would ever see Jenny again. There were so
many times I thought about going back to the Japanese
restaurant to see Jill, but I never did. I was still in love with
Jenny, although she may have never loved me. I thought
about her every minute, every second for so many nights,
dreaming about that we were together, but whenever I
woke up, I would feel very depressed. It was all just a
dream, a stupid dream.
It was like this for an entire year, until one beautiful
night nearing the end of the summer in 2000, I was working
at the outlet store. I was the cashier. I kept hearing Jenny’s
voice and someone talking about me in the store. I was very
busy on the cashier register and I couldn’t look around, but
I was thinking maybe it was just my imagination, because
she had been in my head all the time. I remember there was
one lady customer walking over to my register, looking at
me very carefully, staring at me over the counter the whole
time, acting like I still owed her lots of money or
something, and then a little girl with a beautiful blonde hair
and her friend came after her.
The pretty blonde haired girl said something to the lady.
“Mom you should buy this.” She looked at me with a very
nice smile. I was thinking it was Jenny, I wasn’t too sure
though. A lot of American girls looked the same to me.
They all have big eyes and blonde hair like Barbie. When
they were leaving, the blonde girl was saying something
about how I couldn’t even recognize her. They were
looking at me on the way out of the store until they walked
out.
That night I was thinking about Jenny even more. I was
wondering if my dream had finally come true. I was
thinking about what to do for two weeks. I wanted to see
her again so bad. I wanted to go back in time, to the store,
just hours before, and ask her if her name was Jenny. I
needed to know.
I was looking on the internet on the computer at my
sister’s house. I had my own computer at the time at my
house, but it was very old and didn’t have internet
capabilities. I was trying to find a web site for the Portland
radio station, 9x.5 fm. The websites were very simple and
only had one page. I remember thinking I should e-mail
them. I was thinking about a year ago, when they were
following me around. Was that real or was it just my
imagination! I was still confused about it, so I e-mailed
them and tried to see what was going on.
I wrote this e-mail to them…
To the best people in the world.
Can I send a message on the air? I just want to send a
message to Jenny in Vancouver WA area that she went to
Clark College. I just want to let her know that I didn’t mean
to scared her at the last time when I was trying to talk to her
at campus about 11 months ago…I was just wonder if she
did make up rumor about me that I was a player…I didn’t
mean to scared her. You have been alike angel flying in my
head just alike a night in the dark every time when I closed
my eyes…I still can feel your energy around me in these 11
months just alike Baytovin music, it is immortalize. I have
been thinking about you more than I said on the letter that I
gave you in these 11 months…I am really hoping that I will
see you again soon…let me have a chance to get to know
you again…because back in the day I didn’t had a
chance…I have been not doing much just going school
learning computer graphic and I am learning American
culture in Seattle area…I hope that I can learn some
American culture from you…thank you to the Dj.
A few days later, I checked the web site again. They
had changed their web page. What used to be only one page
had changed to 5-6 pages, plus one could listen to the radio
online. They also had midnight dedications playing slow
jams between 11pm to 1am. There was a new DJ, Jeff T.
They played hip-hop all day. The midnight dedication was
for people to make phone calls or to send e-mails to the
one’s they loved. I like to think that they created the show
especially for me.
I started listening to it every night whenever I had
chance get to a computer that had a internet. I heard the
radio station talk about someone like me almost every hour.
I heard the DJ talk about someone that was supposed to be
famous about a year ago, that “Someone” and Jenny were
supposed to be together a long time ago. They read my
message that I sent to her on the air. I was so excited about
that I might’ve been able to see Jenny again!
About a week later, I was working at the pizza
restaurant. The kitchen was open to the dining room. So if I
was working in the kitchen, I could see through the dining
room. I heard a lady and her friend chatting about me,
saying something about Jenny. I thought, maybe it was
Jenny’s mom, the one I saw at the store the other night. I
wasn’t sure. I had bad flea bites on me from my
roommate’s five little kittens. I was feeling dizzy and itchy
at work. I remembered that I was making fun of my coworker,
Jimmy, teasing her, something I normally didn’t
do. I was so dizzy from the flea bites, I didn’t even know
what I was talking about. I had found that whenever guys
were nice to her, she automatically thought they were
trying to get in her pants. So while I was poking fun at her,
the lady in the dining room who I believed was Jenny’s
mom said something about it, and everything was kind of
awkward.
Another week later, my fall quarter of school started
again. The apartment with the cat flea’s, was getting worse
and worse. I had a fever from fleas biting me the first day I
got back to school. I was standing outside my computer
classroom hallway, waiting for the teacher to come open
the classroom for us, when I saw two girls standing about
15 feet from me. I took a quick look at them. I had a very
bad fever and was feeling so dizzy. I thought it was Jenny
for a second. Most American girls looked the same to me
so it took me some time to figure out if it was her. I heard
them talking about me. She told her friend that I didn’t
Mack. She was mad. “We’re supposed to be married. I
wonder what kind of trip he’s on.”
I was thinking about to going up to talk to her, but I
heard her say something about me being an asshole; that I
didn’t even know English. I heard her friend ask, “Are you
making fun of him now?”
She said,”Of course I make fun of him before he
make’s fun of me.” Her mom must’ve seen me working
and making fun of Jimmy. I stopped to talk to Jenny. I had
to stop the mean talk. I was waiting until she calmed down
a little bit, hoping maybe she would be in my class. I
thought she registered for the same12:00 class. I turned
around and looked again, but they were gone. They were
gone, and I was so mad at myself for letting the opportunity
slip by. But I was happy that she thought we were supposed
to be married. I was hoping maybe I would see her the next
day, but unfortunately, she didn’t come back, and I still
wasn’t sure what was going on….
The cat flea’s was getting really bad. I had to move out
the apartment. I knew my roommate was mad at me
because of it, but I had no choice. I moved into a new
house and was renting a room from an Asian lady in
Bellevue with 3 other roommates. My room didn’t have
phone jacks and I couldn’t access the internet. Besides, it
was charging too much for internet access at that time. But
still, it hindered me from talking Jenny again.
Whenever I had the chance to get on the internet, I
started e-mailing 9x.5 again. “Tell Jenny that I have been
thinking about her and hoping that I will see her again at
school campus.” I didn’t know why. I knew she wouldn’t
come see me again. I started feeling depressed, a far cry
from the excitement of us possibly being together.
A few weeks later, I was chatting with a classmate of
mine outside the classroom. I asked my classmate, John if
he saw a new girl there the first day of school. He said he
kind of remembered something like that. He either said the
girl kind of looked like me, or was looking at me. I wasn’t
sure what he said. I told him that she was my lover and that
I wasn’t sure if that was her, because I was sick and had a
flea bite and was dizzy that morning. I started feeling like I
was hearing voices. I turned around, and a girl with
Chinese dress pants on was staring at me. She was standing
right behind me the whole time.
When I got back to the classroom, I heard that girl
saying something about me to her classmate. It was her
mom or aunt or something. I was wondering if she was
Jenny’s friend from the first day of class, when I saw them,
but I wasn’t sure. I kept thinking about it until the next day,
when I thought about talking to that girl to find out, but
they both didn’t show up to the class anymore. Later, I
found out from my teacher that her name was Melissa. My
teacher said that, for some reason, they both didn’t come to
class anymore. I asked him if I could get some information
about Melissa, so I could find Jenny, but the teacher said
that he couldn’t give out any information, that it’s part of
school policy. So I didn’t bother with him again.
I forwarded an e-mail to Jenny through the Portland
radio station again. “I have been thinking about you… my
love is real…why you have someone spy at me in school
but won’t let me see you…I am so depress without seeing
you…I had been waited for you for almost a year…why
don’t you believe me…I hope that I will see you again
soon…”
The next thing I heard, the radio station on the internet
said that I should totally make a movie about it. The DJ
said the audience had heard of me on the air and thought
that our story was very interesting, that the audience
wanted to know what my voice sounded like. The DJ said
all I had to do was just call in, “We will find you a Jenny,”
but I didn’t call right away. I still had a deep accent in my
voice and I felt embarrassed about my English not being
good enough and I didn’t want to make Jenny feel stupid to
have a boyfriend like me. I didn’t want my voice to come
through the air like that. I was just shy about my tone and I
was afraid that they might’ve asked me some question on
the air that I wouldn’t know how to answer, or that they
couldn’t understand what I was trying to say. I was too shy
to make the phone call to the radio station.
A week later, I was at my friend Frank’s apartment in
Seattle. He had the internet, so I was listening to the radio
on 9X.5 online and e-mailed to the midnight dedication; I
wanted to see Jenny so bad, so I make a phone called to
them at 3:00am in the middle of a night. I was talking to
Jeff T and I asked him if they ever received a message by
e-mail that I have been looking for Jenny, and then Jeff T
said that they don’t help audience look for people. Then I
say OK, thank you.
Then next thing I heard the Dj, Jeff t saying something
on the radio that I was listening on the internet at my friend
Frank’s house. Jeff T said that we are not that easy alike
what you think ok. And then next thing the internet on line
to that radio station got cut off.
I was wondering what the hell is going on. I start
believes that they just trying to fool me.
And then next day, I e-mail to them again that I am
coming back to Vancouver wa this week. I hope that I can
meet Jenny at outside the art building at Clark college that
the first time that I really meet her and talk to her in that
earlier morning, If she still can remember where’s at, or I
will meet her at Clark college outside the library at 7:30pm
this coming Thursday.
So I drove back from Seattle to Vancouver with the
excited feeling and I went to Clark college on the following
Thursday at 7:30 pm and I was waited for 45 minutes but I
didn’t see jenny show up. And then I left. On the way home
back in to Seattle. I was listening to the radio Fm9#.5 and
the DJs were name CareeyEX and P. Boy. They were
making fun of me on the air, said that we are not that easy.
We are the player and we don’t care about how you feel.
We just continue our show and your story, and since that
day, the DJ from that radio station also start making up
rumor and make fun of me and said that I did girls in the
ass and other sexual slander about me, and also talk about
that I was a gangster and more. I didn’t know why that they
said that. I had no ideas why they were start talk about me
alike this. I was just looking for someone on the air from a
radio business that I thought I can trust. I did also tried to email
to other Portland radio business as fm 10#.3, but
which they are all related to each other.
I got really mad about it, because I know that they just
trying to fool me and they won’t really trying to help me to
see Jenny again. They were just trying to use me, but I
couldn’t do anything about it, because that is the only way
that I can see Jenny again. In this half year, I email to the
Portland radio station Fm 9X.5 that I wish can meet Jenny
at Clark College outside the library every time when I had a
chance to get a day off from work and no school day to
come back to Vancouver wa home, but I don’t see jenny
there, and the radio station just make fun of me all the time.
I was start getting depressed again about what the radio
business done to me. I would said that my feeling and my
mood start getting unstable, because I know that the radio
station business have been just trying to fool me, and plus I
really want to see Jenny, a girl that we are suppose can be
married and suppose to be together a long time ago. And of
course on the radio to the air, the DJs make the sound that
they are nice and good DJ and helping me out, but which
they are not in behind the radio station. I was very upset,
but I still email to the radio business. Most the time I just e
mail to them that I am very depress with out seeing jenny
again. I am really hope that she will come see me.
I keep e-mail to them for another half year but Jenny
didn’t come see me. I got really depress at that time, just
because I knew that radio station was just fucking with me
and I didn’t know what else bad thing or nasty thing that
the radio DJ said about me on the air. I remember one of
the lonely night when I was in my room all by-my-self, it
was at the end of the 2000, I had a difficult feeling and
thoughts. I didn’t know what was going. I feeling very
depress about that jenny still haven’t come see me again,
and I was thinking that is not right, especially every time
when I thought about that I heard jenny said that we
supposed to be married. I am a nice guy. I couldn’t live
alike this that a girl know where I am at, .and on the air!!!
that I always can only hear her message on the radio air that
she loves me but she didn’t come see me, and I knew the
radio business have been just fucking with my emotion and
feeling to continue their show and using me.
I wrote a note on my computer, hoping that people will
know why I commit suicide if I die tonight and said that I
really couldn’t live like this anymore. I love jenny and
Jenny loves me from I heard on the air. I had waited for her
for almost two year and half since the day we met. I am not
a player and I am a sweet guy. I just really couldn’t live
like this with this kind of strange feeling that I couldn’t
explain. this kind of lonely and cold inside me. I am
wonder if I will see her after I die with my spirit and I
know that the radio station is not helping me out and they
are just fucking with me at the whole time and taking my
life alike a radio show. the only way that I can stopped and
to see jenny again, maybe is to kill my-self. I left God to
judge if I should die or keep my-self a life.
I used to had a bad habit is that I play with my gun
when I am depress. I open the closet took my revolver out
and I am not suppose to have gun again by law, but some
way, I got my gun, and it is a revolver and I load one bullet
in it. I was playing with it, I turn the loader once and then
pull the trigger in my mouth with Russian roulette style.
But fortunately that god or devil didn’t want me to die. The
bullet was on the next loader. and then next thing I start to
cry, until I fell in sleep. I never been through that depressed
in my whole life, because this situation in love but Jenny
didn’t come see me and the radio station business fuck with
my life at the whole time. That was my first time that I
really try to commit suicide. It is all about the radio
business DJ and Paul Alxxx.
Chapter 8
2001 New Year
Few days later, I e-mailed the radio station Fm
9X.5, saying that I was trying to commit suicide,
because I couldn’t stand not seeing Jenny, and she knew
where I was at the whole time, and how their radio business
fucked with me on the air, and how they talked about me,
saying that I liked to do girls in the ass and all kinds of
nasty things about me. But the radio station didn’t care
about how I felt. They made fun of me and made up more
nasty rumors about me, and made fun of me even more
often on the air, especially saying that I liked to do girls in
the ass. Since that day, I decided to save my life by fucking
with the radio station myself, even though I was thinking
about killing my-self. I would’ve taken the DJ and the
entire radio business with me.
Some weeks later, I got a new job at a bar in Kirkland
as a cook. My school schedule always changed, and I
always had to find new jobs. Most of the time, I would get
really excited in the morning when I got back to school and
work, because I thought that I would see Jenny at anytime,
and usually I would get really depressed after 10:00pm,
feeling disappointed that Jenny didn’t come see me.
Somehow my mood became disorderly and I was feeling
sick all the time. Depression was killing me. It was making
my stomach hurt.
I remember one time, I e-mailed the radio station,
saying, “Jenny, Jenny, Jenny, you are my babe. I never
called a girl a babe in my life, and you are my first girl call
a babe, I really didn’t know what I had done to you. how
come you don’t come see me? I have been loving you for
so long and the whole town know about it though to the air.
I just hope that I can see you again. and as soon as I see you
again, everything will be back at one again and from the
very beginning. I like you because you look like a cartoon
animation character or look like a Barbie.”
The next night, when I got back to work at the bar, I
was getting something to drink for my co-worker in the
kitchen. I walked out to the dinning room, and I saw a lady
and a man. I believe they were Jenny’s parents. They were
saying something really loud so that half the dining room
and the bar could hear it. “That is him. Jenny has been
waiting for him for a long time.” They were saying
something about some girl I supposedly did in the ass.
“Jenny is a virgin, of course she would let him do whatever
he wants. Jenny’s not old enough to come in the bar.
Jenny’s pretty smart, she had her four year college degree
and she is only 20 years old,” blah, blah, blah. Her
husband, who was a really nice man, I believe Jenny’s dad,
said, “Andy is not bad either. He is working on the
computer program and knows animation. You know, he
could be an actor in Hollywood, too?” I was about to go up
and talk to them, but I was feeling shy and embarrassed
about what they said about me, especially talk about that I
like to do girl in the ass which I never did and from all the
people, including all the waitress’s hearing what they said
in the dining room. I ignored them and pretended that I
didn’t hear them. I was about ready to go back out to the
dining room and talk to them, but they were already gone. I
was hoping that maybe the next day I would see Jenny at
my school, Lake Washington Technical College. I was kind
of excited about it. Unfortunately, she didn’t come to see
me the next day, and I got very depressed and very
disappointed again.
On the Valentine’s day of 2001, I e-mailed the Portland
Radio station. I told Jenny that I loved her, I loved her, I
loved her and always loved her and hopefully I would see
her at school, just because everybody that I knew were
celebrating Valentine’s day except me, as I waited for
Jenny. I couldn’t find anyone and I didn’t want to bother
anyone to use their internet to listen to the Portland radio
station. I drove two hours all the way to Olympia, WA to
listen to the Portland radio station at night to see if Jenny
had any messages for me. When I drove to Olympia, I was
listening to Fm 9X.5 for about an hour, until I received a
cell phone call from my mom who lived in Vancouver. She
said that my grandmother had just died that afternoon and
that grandfather was in the hospital. My grandmother was
cleaning up the ceiling in the kitchen, because the heater
had broken and lots of dust shot out on the ceiling. So she
tried to clean it up, but accidentally, she fell and had broken
her neck. They believed that my grandfather called my
aunts restaurant, but they were so busy that day because of
Valentine’s Day that no one could pick up the phone at my
aunt’s restaurant, so grandfather tried to go out side to get
help, but no one could understand him, because he didn’t
know any English. He tried to walk to my aunt’s restaurant
for help, but he had a heart attack on the way and the
ambulance had to pick him up off the street.
About a week later, my grandfather also passed away
after my grandmother.
I got very upset for a little while, because I was
thinking that my grandparents had always fought most of
their whole life, and every time they fought, they always
insulted each other really bad, saying mean things to each
other, but in the end, I believed they really just loved each
other. Grandfather gave out his life trying to do the best to
save my grandmother’s. I feel bad that I never had the
chance to show them how Jenny looked, because I used to
talk to them about how I met a nice girl in college. They
were really excited when I would talk about Jenny, because
I’m the only grandson in the family. My grandmother
always thought American girls were very cute and looked
like dolls. My grandparents used to worry about my future.
I wished I could’ve told them that I might have been a
Hollywood star with Snowdogg. I felt bad that I never had
the chance to show them how Jenny looked. They thought
we were going to get married.
Charter 9 Summer, 2001
The spring quarter in school was over. I still hadn’t
seen Jenny. I e-mailed the radio station saying I was
going to move into a new apartment or house that I find in
the newspaper, and hopefully, I’d get internet access. I also
got a new computer for school, and it had internet software.
Eventually, I moved into a very nice house, a two story
house in Kirkland, WA. It was very close to work and
school. The landlord lived upstairs and downstairs was for
rent. I didn’t usually see the landlord, because we had two
different doors, but I had two roommates living downstairs
with me. This was how I met my roommate, Cobe. The
other roommate didn’t really come around often. I only saw
him once a week for a minute. I never saw Cobe working,
because he told me that he was on disability. He had a back
problem from falling at work, so most the time he was in
that house. I talked to him most the time, and found he was
a nice guy, until one day, things got really fishy. I was
listening to 9X.5 on the internet and the radio station was
still talking about someone like me. They said that I still
didn’t want to be famous although I could’ve been in
Hollywood, singing. I e-mailed the radio station when
CareeyEX and P. Boy were on their show.
I said, “I really don’t give fuck about famous or be in a
Hollywood, because I can see my future on my computer
graphic class that I am taking. I am major in computer
graphic as video game design and video production. I am
really a person that I really care about my personal privacy.
I didn’t like to be famous and all I want just to see Jenny. I
am wondering how long you guys radio station thinking
about to fuck with me??? It has been a year already since I
have been e-mail to you guys. If I want to be famous in the
future; I might be able to depend my-self, because I am
major in computer graphic as video production and video
game on the side.”
The next moment, everything started getting trippier.
CareeyEX and P. boy said something about what I had just
ate for dinner the day before, how many times I went to
bathroom, and how many times I took a shower in a day in
that house, and also how many time that I masturbated that
day. I started getting a little paranoid about what they said to
me when I was listening to the radio on internet, and then
they told me on the air playing through the internet that they
had the best spy technology in the world, that they are not
just a radio station like what I thought, that their boss would
like to meet me, since I didn’t want to talk to them.
Then, everything started reminding me of a couple
years ago. I was thinking of the radio station following me
when I was moving to Seattle a couple years before, in
summer, 1999, when I had heard my co-workers at the
beachside restaurant, calling the radio station and had me
followed and got me put in the hospital and so much more
bullshit. I started believing everything was really against
me, that I was being followed and that there were spy
equipments at my sister’s apartment.
I searched the internet to find out the radio station’s
owner’s name. I found that he is Paul AlXX, a billionaire
who is one of the richest people in the world, that he use to
be the president of one of the biggest computer company’s
that was related to another man, Mr. Gates. I knew they had
the best technology in the world. Even the government used
computer technology to spy on other countries and all that
spy technology was related to computers. The next thing, I
heard the 9X.5 DJs saying something how I should
recognize, their radio business was not that easy to play
like what I thought, and that even my roommate was linked
to them.
I walked up to Cobe’s door. I asked him, “If you are
related to the radio business, then who have I been emailing
to?” He didn’t answer me. I said, “You better
fucking tell me, before I kick your ass, and even
afterwards, I might still kick your ass.” Cobe said, “It’s not
as bad as what you think. The radio station wants you to be
famous, man.” He turned on the TV and told me to chill out
and watch it, and afterwards, he walked out the door and
never came back. I was watching the TV and saw
Snowdogg, Dr.J and a few other people on the TV talking
to me. “Welcome to the Hollywood,” they said. “We’ve
tried to convince you to cooperate with us, just like a few
years ago, when you first moved to Seattle.” That was long
before I went to the hospital, and it still hadn’t stopped.
My mind was full of confusion and depression. I got
very upset about my privacy being lost and thinking about
Jenny. I was being traced and basically, Jenny had been
part of it, too. In past years, the radio station thought that
our story was interesting and they wanted us to be in
Hollywood. Now it was their propaganda.
I told the TV or spy equipment in the house that they
had better kill me, because I was going to let the whole
world know about how fucked up their radio and
entertainment business were in the future, and I said, “Fuck
you, Paul AlXX billionaire and your fucked up spy
equipment.”
I packed up a few clothes and got out of the house.
When I walked out of the house to my car outside, there
was a dark green Jeep rolling by me very slowly and they
rolled down the window. They were all staring at me. I
thought that I was going to get killed right there. I was
about to pull my gun with my revolver from my holster, but
then they drove off. I jump in my car and got out of there. I
was very upset. I felt like I had no place to hide or get away
from the radio business anymore. So I drove all the way
back to Vancouver, to my parents house. On the way from
Seattle on FREE WAY I5, that green color Jeep was
following behind me about 20-30 feet away. I was listening
to the radio station from Seattle, Fm 10X.7, but somehow,
they changed my radio frequency to Portland’s 9X.5 FM.
DJ CareeyEX and P. Boy could talk to me from the radio in
my car. They were making fun of my privacy, about what I
had done in that house, and told me that there would be no
place like home and no matter where I went, I was being
watched.
At that time, in my mind, the only thing I could think of
was trying my best to find out exactly what kind of spy
technology they had. It could’ve been a spy microphone
that they put in my car, or spy camera in that house that I
rented. I really didn’t know, because spy equipment could
be anything these days, especially when it’s related to Paul
AlXX, a billionaire, and he had the best technology in the
world. I was also thinking about Jenny. She was someone
that I loved, and I didn’t want her privacy being watched by
their spy equipments as well. I was so upset and confused.
Back in Vancouver, my parents asked me why I was
back. I told them what was happening, that I was being
traced and followed by spy equipment, but they didn’t
believe me and thought that maybe something was wrong
with my head, because they always thought that I had a
mental problem since a few years ago, the summer I went
to the hospital. They always heard that I had talked to my
sister’s boyfriend about Jenny. I used to be so quiet, that I
never talk to my parents much. We didn’t communicate
much my whole life, and they were always busy working
most of the time.
I called the police when I was back in Vancouver and
told the police about what was going on, that there were
spy equipments and that I was being followed by the radio
business that I e-mailed to, but the police talked to me like I
was crazy and needed help, saying he had never had a case
like this one and said that spy equipment could be anything
or nothing at all these days. He said there wasn’t much they
could do about it. I also knew it, and knew he knew what
he was talking about. I said I was just hoping that they had
a record of it, so in the future if anything happened to me,
they would have a record.
Some days later, my family and I went back to the
house that I rented in Kirkland to pick up all my stuff.
When we were packing up my stuff that day, I had found
that, somehow, Cobe wasn’t there. Normally, he was
always in his room from his disability. The landlord of the
house wasn’t there either. We left all the stuff at my sister’s
apartment in Bellevue. My dad suggested that we went to
Canada on the way to Seattle. I was being forced to go with
them, even though I really wasn’t in that kind of mood. On
the way to Canada, I was nonstop trying to explain to them
how I got related to the radio business, but most of the
time, they just kind of annoyed me. We were in Canada for
two nights. We came back to Seattle to my sister’s
apartment. My dad and I got in a fight when he tried to
force me to go back to the hospital, because I was nonstop
talking about it. My dad thought that I had a mental
problem, like a few years ago, but they didn’t know that my
co-worker at the Beachside restaurant and Jenny had called
up the radio station first, and got me traced and followed by
the business.
That was my first time fighting with my father and the
first time he hit me in the face, but I didn’t fight back. He
called the Bellevue police to take me to Lake Washington
hospital in Kirkland, just because the police and the doctor
didn’t believe the radio station wanted me to be famous and
followed me around with their spy equipments. The
hospital made me stay for 72 hours because they said that
my roommate called the police saying that I was pointing a
gun at him, which I didn’t do. I was worried that the
hospital would lock me up for more than 72 hours. So when
I was in the hospital that first day, I made a phone call to
my friend Frank in Seattle, telling him to send an e-mail to
the Portland radio station 9X.5 FM.
I said in the e-mail that I was hoping the radio station
would do me a favor. I wanted them to make a phone call
to Lake Washington hospital and tell the doctor that they
wanted me to be famous and that they did mention me on
the air. I could’ve forgotten everything in the past about
how they were tracing me and following me around. Then
the next day, in the early morning, I woke up in the
hospital, I wasn’t sure if it was Jenny and her mother sitting
at the counter by the door in the psychological emergency
department. The girl looked like Jenny but her hair color
had changed. She was looking at me and I just couldn’t be
sure, because I had just woken up and the medication made
me very drowsy and dizzy. I was in a hurry to go meet with
the doctor, and after I talked to the doctor, they were
already gone.
In that 72 hours that I was locked up in the hospital I
didn’t say anything to the doctor about being followed or
that the radio station wanted me to be famous. I knew that
if I told him everything he might think that I am crazy and
make me stay in the hospital longer so most the time I just
stayed very quiet.
Three days later, I got released from the hospital and
had to go to Columbia Mental Health in Vancouver, WA to
check in. My mother came to Lake Washington hospital in
Kirkland to pick me up. When I got back to Vancouver, Wa
I was listening the Portland radio station 9X.5 most the
time. The radio station was making it sound like I was
welcome back in town and they were calling me a
representative. That is what they always call me on the air.
They were still saying that they wanted me to be a famous
singer or actor. But most of the time when I am by myself
and listening to the radio station the DJ would still talk to
me with their spy equipment around me. They also had
technology that could change my radio frequency.
Then the next day I went back to the Clark College
security office to find the supervisor named Victor because
I knew that he was good friend of Jenny’s. I didn’t tell him
what I had been through about the radio station, the spy
equipment, and that I was being followed. I didn’t want
him to think that I am crazy or something and I was
concerned about Jenny’s privacy so I just asked him if he
can help me to see Jenny again. I told him that I was a
misunderstood mental case that had dropped out of Clark
College a few years before when I moved to Seattle. But
Victor said that Jenny had already graduated the year
before and that he didn’t see her anymore. He suggested I
write her a letter and said that maybe he could give to her
when she came around. I said “Okay”, I will do it.
When I was on the campus lots people saw and
recognized me and began to talk about hearing me on the
radio. They were saying that I could be an actor or singer.
The reason I believed that they recognized me was because
there weren’t many Asian people living in Vancouver plus
the way I dress since the radio station had talked about my
clothes and my hair style.
I couldn’t sleep for a few days when I first moved back
to Vancouver because I was so excited that I might see
jenny again. My mind couldn’t stop thinking about the how
the radio station followed and traced me with their spy
equipment and how I could talk to the radio station DJ
when I was alone at the my parents house with the radio
was on. Most of the time they just talked to me with
cooperate with them and told me to forget about the spy
equipment and that there was no way that I can run away
from them.
I remember at that time, Snowdog, Jay Z, and a few
other singers were coming to Clark County to have a
concert. On the air they were said that they were in
Vancouver for a concert and that they wanted to pick up
some Asian that sounded like me. They wanted to take him
back to L.A to train him to become a rapper. At that time I
could also talk to Snowdog when I was alone listening to
the radio station (using their spy equipment and the
equipment that could change my radio frequency). Most of
the time they told me to cooperate and said that I could be
huge in the Hollywood and represent Vancouver and the
Northwest. Most of the time the answer that I give them
was, “Fuck you, Snowdog, Paul Allen and get all your spy
equipment and stay away from me.”
About a week later, I was searching for a job around
Vancouver and hoping that Jenny would come see me at
work soon because I knew that she had my social security
number. I was stopping by the fish house restaurant on mill
plain to fill out an application form when a girl that works
there came up to me and called me a jack off and said that I
make them look like a loser. I wasn’t sure why she said
that. Maybe she heard of me on the air since the radio
station was talking about me and how I made the whole
town like a loser with their delusions. I was trying to figure
out who she is, and then I started to remember that she
went to college with me and used to always ask me for
cigarette, but I forgot her name. Anyway, I got back in my
car with Fm 9X.5 on and they told me that her name is
Sunset. She was born and raised in town and more,
(Because they have the best spy equipments and they also
have equipments can change my radio frequency.)
I was thinking, another person might get traced, but I
couldn’t do anything about it.
A week later, I found a job in Vancouver wa and I was
working at the #mokey pizza on mill plain. I remember
about three weeks later when I was working in the
restaurant kitchen. I looked outside the register counter and
saw a girl with black hair who looked like Jenny and was
smiling at me. I wasn’t sure that it was her because I was so
busy. Jenny used to have blonde hair and maybe she dyed
it, so it took me some time to think if it was her, but right
when I was about to go up to talk to her, she had already
left.
And then that night when I was off, I went home to
listen to the radio station and the DJ told me that Jenny did
come to my work to see me today but I didn’t recognize
her. (They have the best spy equipments and they also have
equipments can change my radio frequency.) I got so
depressed and mad at myself that I didn’t recognized her,
and most the time the radio were still convince me to
cooperate with them, and I also can talk to a lot of different
singers as Snowdog, Dr. J, m and m, Christina, J rule, and
more.
I remember one night that was my first time to talk to
that one girl on the radio when I was in my garage. She told
me that she was here in Portland for a concert and she
invited me to her concert at Portland rose quarter. And she
said that I should have a record come out. I was talking to
her half of the night. Then I asked her who she was. She
said that I would hear her on the news tomorrow morning.
The next morning I heard that BXXXney and Justin had
broken up in Portland because Justin was sleeping with
some lesbian from Vancouver wa.
Chapter 10
Fall, 2001
September, 11th, 9-11, the World Trade Center
building in new York got crashed by an airplane,
because terrorists were attacking the U.S. I won’t ever
forget how many people died. A couple of months later, I
got very depressed because Jenny didn’t come to see me at
work again. The radio DJ were talking about me on the air
and saying that I like to do girls in the ass and other nasty
harassing things about me. I was being harassed by some
people at the Vancouver mall when I was shopping. They
were in the audience that had heard of me on the air and
they recognized me from how the radio station talk about
me being an Asian and the way I dress. Like I said there
aren’t many Asians in Vancouver. I know that the radio
station won’t leave alone with all their spy equipment. I
was feeling so depressed at work. I had to walk out in the
middle of my work that night.
When I got home, I was listening to the radio. The
station can still talk to me. They were talking about my
privacy and making fun of it. Like how I sleep, how many
times I went to the bathroom, my family conversation, and
followed up about what I done today and yesterday. Finally
I really couldn’t stand the spy equipment around me. At the
middle of night, I went to the southwest hospital because I
was so depressed about the radio station Dj talking about
me on the air and spy equipment around me. I was sitting
outside the emergency room at the hospital. A nurse from a
counter walked up to me and asked me what I was doing
there. “are you waiting for someone?”
Then I said “no” since I didn’t want to tell her what was
going on about the radio station, because I didn’t want her
to think that I was crazy or something. Then I said, “I am
just feeling very depressed.”
Then the nurses made me stay at the hospital
emergency room for the night. But it didn’t help me with
anything because I knew that there was no way that I could
keep the radio station from talking about me on the air and
the spy equipment that they had. All I know is that I can’t
get away from the radio station harassments.
The next day, I went back to work, but I had been fired.
The manager said that I walked off the job. I was hoping
that I could find a new job soon, but the economy was so
bad in the United States, after 9/11 and U.S was starting a
war to fight terrorists. Portland and Vancouver WA area
become the second worse jobless area in the United states. I
couldn’t find any jobs to see Jenny again. Most of the time
I was stayed home in the garage, because I was living with
my parents and I didn’t want them to be watched by the
radio station spy equipments. Most of the time, I had the
radio on in my garage, and hoped that they would let me
know where Jenny was at. I always can talk to the radio
DJs and the singers from Hollywood, like Snowdog, Dr. J,
m and m, Christina, J rule, and more.
I started writing letters to the Clark college security
office to supervisor, Victor and telling him what I been
through, about the radio station business harassments, the
spy equipment, and I that I was being followed. I also tried
to see jenny or meet her at the security office so I can ask
her a few question and maybe I can do something about
this story to fight back against the radio business and Paul
ALXX’s Billionaire spy equipment...
Chapter 11
Spring, 2002
I started taking a couple of night classes at Clark
College at the spring, 2002. The reason I didn’t any
take classes in the day time, is that I knew that there will be
more students will attend there at the college in the day
time. I didn’t want more people get trace like I did, by the
radio station because I was being trace. Paul alxxx has the
best technology in the world, and at that time I still couldn’t
figure out what kind of spy techniques that they were using.
I was taking a sign language class and a guitar lesson,
hoping that Jenny, will know that I am taking some classes,
and that she will come see me soon. I remember at that
time a classmate in my guitar class always talk about me,
and that they had heard of me, from listening to the radio
station. They recognized me right away from my hair and
the way I dress. Most the time that I was just being very
quiet about what was going on, keeping it to myself,
because it’s nothing to be proud, or to share with others of
I
the experience(s) behind this radio station, harassing me
and stalking me with spy equipments.
Unfortunately, Jenny didn’t come see me. I started to
get even more depressed, after all the excitement that I was
building up, that I going to see her once again. I start
thinking that the best way to get away from the radio
business harassments, and try to fight back is to let
everybody know about the Paul Al### and his radio station
business goes around harassing people. Then I decided to
contact to the local ColumbiaX and Portland newspaper
company, to let them know about the FM radio station was
harassing me. The newspaper won’t give me the time of
day, nor would anyone help me, because they are related to
the Paul AL### or do business with him in the
entertainment field. With outrage and discuss, I contacted
the local authorities of both Vancouver,WA and Portland,
OR police again , I explained to them about what happen,
how I was being traced around by the radio business and
the spy camera equipments they used, and more
information to help them better understand my plea of
mercy, and they still did not give me any help. They only
stated that, I have a mental problem and then hang up on
me. Is this justice? Is this right to do to a local citizen of the
United States?
Being let down by Jenny again. I was thinking about
creating a web site of my own, to express to the public,
about my story of how this mistreatment, and intrustion of
my privacy, on the air even, with millions listening. Out of
desperation, I needed legal help, someone who knew how
to get through to someone who could help with my
situation. I then ran into another issue, my own language
barriers, I then needed someone can be my writer because
my writing skill was so low, my grammar is so poor and
spelling was really bad.
I am still working on my English currently, I then went
to the fish house restaurant, to find the one girl that she
works there remembering that she call me a jack off and
more …so I believe maybe that she had heard of me from
listening to the radio. It would be more easy for me to work
on it, plus the reason that I selected her, was that I did
heard the radio station talk about her and that she might
being trace or spied on by them. So, I stopped in at the fish
house restaurant to meet her, I wrote her a couple letters to
explain to her that I am being tracing by the radio business,
and that she is being trace too. Hoping that she can be my
writer to have this true story come out to let everybody to
know about the radio station harassments, so I can fight
back to the radio station business and have a lawsuit filed
against them in the process.
The radio station did talk about that I was trying to talk
to some other girl at that time on the public air; because I
heard people that heard of me on the air talk about that
when I was window shopping at the Vancouver mall. There
were a lots of girl that recognized me from they had heard
from the radio, and from time to time try to come around
me and most of them they would said something alike if I
represent they don’t mind to give me some…”? I’m not too
sure what they meant by this statement, but it was not to
friendly at the time, so I walked away. I also heard that
people talk about that I don’t love Jenny anymore and
talking to some other girl, which is not true at all, just
another rumor they were getting from the radio. I was
getting harassed by the radio station with their spy
equipments, being traced and tracked down like an animal.
I needed a writer and Jenny doesn’t come by anymore
to help me out… at this part from what I know by law that
the radio business didn’t have right to talk about it on the
air, a gross violation my civil and privacy rights as a
citizen. They also didn’t have right to trace me around and
talk about me on the air alike their radio show with all the
sexual harassment and more….because I feel this is my
personal privacy and human rights.
Unfortunately, a few days later, a police call my house,
said that Sunset talk to him that I was harassing her at her
work and she is married…..and then I tried to explain to the
police that I wasn’t trying to make any advances of any
kind to her or anything, only that I’m having a problem
with the radio business, I am being trace by them and I
believe the radio station did trace her too, and needed to
inform her of their actions of evil doing on the radio, and in
my own place of stay. I also ask the police to give me some
help about the radio station harassment but he just hang up
on me…..again, no help from them with my complaint, just
falling on deaf ears again here.
So with Sunset misunderstanding me, she was out of
the picture to help me out, and so was Jenny, whom I really
wanted to help me out in the first place.
Since I did not receive any help from anyone, I just
mostly stay home most of the time in my garage, practice
the computer graphic class program that I had learn
because it is related video production. Things like, how to
graphic movie and put music in the background and tried to
read some book, practice my writing and learn ,how do sing
and think about have a record come out by my-self with out
the fuck up radio business to fight back the radio station
harassments. I wanted to prove to everybody , friends, and
family both that the radio station is not all they seen to be
and that they didn’t have right to do all these kinds of
harassments towards me, or anyone of any color ( white,
black, green, yellow, brown and so So most the time that I
was just practice my writing and train my tone to sing. And
then somehow I find out my-self that I can do a lot of
different tones. When I sung in the past, I did not know
how to carry a note, because I had been a very quiet guy, I
didn’t know that I my-self, could do tones like I do know.
I have also starting learn how do play with the digital
equipments to make music beats on computer. The hardest
part is that I couldn’t write lyrics like the pro’s, so I didn’t
have very many lyrics to work with in my music projects.
Even the radio station DJ’s and singers thought that I
was amazing about that I can do so many different tones
when I sing in my garage ( they have the best spy
equipments and they also have equipments can change
my radio frequency) this radio station start’s talking
about how I can sing on the public air. Most the time I
stay in the garage, practice my tone and work on the
music beats, and hopefully I will have a record come out
to beat all the singers on the radio and prove people that
radio station is not all that good of a business, and that
they do more harm than good. Being home a lot by
myself, I could always talk to the radio station Dj’s.all
the singers in my own garage.
In that year, I did try to use recorder that they used in
the spy equipment that they use to pick up my voice in the
home/apt., to record when they talk me on the air for an
evidence against them by yelling out things, but every time
when I tried to do this, they will just play the music the
radio. So I couldn’t record anything that the radio are
talking to me, or it’s not going to the radio station directly?
I really don’t know what kind of spy equipments that they
got? All I know is that must be a really good piece of spy
equipments machinery that have obtained. I do know that
the radio station is owned by Paul Al### and other
individuals.
Chapter 12
2002 summer
In this year, I did write about 20 letters to the Clark
college security office to the supervisor Victor to let
them know about my situation about the radio station
harassments, and permission to see Jenny again, but they
never help me for some reason? Every time when I dropped
off a letter, somehow I will hear the radio station talk about
my letters.
I start going out to the nightclub scene, the kind that
have a live local singer’s, and bands around the Portland
area, to find out how to make a recording of music. I have
also tried to find an underground music production
company, to get more training on recording music. I also
thought about that I should let more people know about the
radio station harassments. Again the radio station will talk
about me, and which club that I went too. For example, if I
went to Xonic lounge last night, the radio station would
talk about that in the next day morning, if I went to xstreet
I
lounge that night, the radio station will talk about that I
went to x street lounge at the next day.
They were also using a lot of delusional language on
the air to make people think that I was a delusional kind of
person, which made other people hate me. The radio station
were speaking about me being an Asian, talking about how
my hair style and what it look like and how I dress. When
people heard this on the radio, they recognized me in the
clubs that I hung out in, and attended.
I tried to talk to some the local filming production
company in Portland area, to co-produce it & put my true
story into a digital film format. I was thinking of making a
film, and place it onto a DVD for distribution. This is the
reason I wanted to depend on my-self, have this film come
out and tried to produce with the local filming production
companies in Portland metro are. I also wanted to use my
art, to make a film & let people to know about the radio
station actions, that Paul AlXXX business owner and their
constant harassments.
My struggle changed to beat the radio station and show
that we can do better than Hollywood or the radio business
could ever do about making fun of me over the airwaves,
where they seemed to be most untouchable. Once again, the
radio station did talk about it on the public air. I figure that
the radio station can talk to me when I am in my garage,
because they have the best spy equipments, they also have
equipments that can change my radio frequency in my
home if needed. The DJ was saying something about who
did I talk to? So, I had to stopped work on this film, I didn’t
want anyone else get trace or spied on. I was so angry and
upset that this radio station was following me around, with
spy equipments. I couldn’t seem to do anything about it….I
then call the police again, but they just told me that I have a
mental problem and hang up on me again.
I went to the radio station and drop off a letter to the
radio Fm 9#.5 businesses to give them a warning….
On the letter I said….
To the radio station business Fm 9#.5
I think it’s enough harassment in these last couple
years. I was just emailing to your radio business to look for
someone that I love and her name is Jenny…you guys are
not helping me out, following me around, placing spy
equipment in my home, that which I couldn’t prove it now,
but I will sue the radio company for harassing me on the
air, and talking about my personal privacy what I am doing
everyday and also making up nasty sexual harassments
comments about me on the air. They said things like, I like
to do girl(s) in the ass….if you guys don’t stopped the radio
station harassments I will be suing you guys for 3 million
dollar or more a day for being talk about me on the air….
On the way home, I was listening to that radio station in
my car, I overheard the Dj was saying something that they
are not scared to get sue, and I should know who the owner
of the radio station.
Chapter 13
2002 fall
I started looking in the phone book to find a lawyer for
legal help in regards to the radio station harassing me
on the air, installing spy equipment around my dwellings,
and more. I contacted 95% of lawyers in the Portland, OR
and Vancouver, WA area, but none will take my matter to
the courts for a case. Most lawyers answered me back
saying they never had a case like this before. I also had a
lawyer who told me that they were scared to pursue this
case because I am suing a billionaire, Paul al####, which is
understandable.
One night in the fall of 2002, I went to a tiger bar in
Portland downtown. I went with a friend of mine named
Bryan. Bryan was working there for one of the part-time
DJs’ from the radio station FM 9#.5. That DJ spins records
part-time at the tiger bar. Actually, Bryan needed a ride to
get to Portland downtown that night, so he gave me a call
I
to do him this favor. That night was the first time I first
walked into the tiger bar.
Some people inside the club recognized me, especially
that night since I wore a bandana on my head and a dirty
pair of skater pants. The radio station talks on the air about
how I dress, that is part of the reason why the people in the
bar recognized me. That night, there was a girl sitting about
5 feet from my table with her friends. I thought that was
Jenny for a little while because her hair, size and face look
almost like Jenny’s, plus she had a Chinese flower shirt on.
Then later I found out that she wasn’t Jenny. She and her
friend were talking about me. She was saying something
like she wants to meet me. She was saying that If I didn’t
mack how did I know if she is a virgin, and she also
wondered how Jenny looked like. She was also saying
something like I like Jenny because she has a four year
college degree, and more things about me from what she
heard from the radio. She just kept talking about me to her
friend for almost half the night. A moment later, she told
my friend Bryan that she was mad because I won’t ask her
for a dance or go up and talk to her. She left the bar soon
after. A short while later, the DJ that works for the radio
station FM 9#.5 shows up. His name was DJ. #hill. I asked
him where was my check for a couple million dollars for all
the harassment I received from the radio station and where
I can find Jenny. He didn’t answer me and just walked
away. I saw him make couple phone calls. That night I
stood by the turn tables with my friend Bryan most of the
time. I didn’t spin any records; I preoccupied myself with
observing the environment. That night I stayed at the tiger
bar until they were closed. I gave a ride to my friend Bryan
and his friend DJ #hill home. On the way home, we
stopped by the gas station to get some gas. I was talking to
DJ #hill and asked him again, “where is my fucking couple
million dollar check for all the radio harassments and
where can I find Jenny?” DJ #hill answered that he only
works for the radio station part time, he didn’t know much
about the situation. He continued saying that maybe I
should cooperate because I should know who the owner of
the radio station is, and that he has the best technology in
the world and this technology is even better than the
governments’ technology.
After I dropped them off that night, I went home and
turned my radio on in my garage. I started talking to the
radio DJ CareeyEX… (Because they have the best spy
equipment, they also have equipment that can change my
radio frequency).
They were saying that I missed the chance to meet a
nice girl at the tiger bar tonight. They said the girl who was
trying to talk to me was a sweet girl. They also started
telling me that I should already know who the owner of the
radio station was and that their spy technology is the best in
the world, even better than the U.S government’s
technology, which included satellite spy equipment and
more. There was no way that I could run away from them.
That same night, I did some research on the internet and
found that we do really have satellite spy equipment here in
the U.S. The article reported that the satellites can take
pictures of people’s car license plates all the way from
space down to earth. I was like holly shit; I now started to
recognize who I was fucking with or who was fucking me.
The U.S. government is using computer technology to
control the spy satellites and the U.S. government is also
using a lot of technology related to super-computers. The
Portland radio station FM 9#.5’s owner is Paul Al###. He
was one of the persons that started the computer revolution.
He used to be the president of MicroXXXX and has over
50 billion dollars.
Baisly, the spy satellite in space has been filming the
whole world and taking pictures every second. The satellite
is not just a receiver anymore; they also can put a very
good camera on it to film the whole world.
I also started thinking that if the U.S government and
Paul al### have such good spy technology and a spy
satellites in space that can film the whole world every
second, what is the reason the U.S. government took so
long in finding the terrorists and Saddam Hussein. Why
couldn’t they trace all the terrorists in the U.S and other
countries? I also was thinking that since we had the best
spy satellites in space filming the whole world, how come
they don’t use it to trace criminal cases that the police or
FBI never can investigate? I was wondering why they
never caught the person who shot the rapper 2Pac. It must
be something that the government and Paul al##’s
entertainment business have been trying to cover up, it
must be something that they can’t let people know.
In that year I wrote a lot of letters to Clark College’s
security office. The letters were addressed to the security
office’s supervisor, Victor. My goal was to meet Jenny at
Clark College’s security office, but I never had any
response…. I need a writer who can write well in English
so that I can write this true story. This true story is
supposed to make big news on a web site. I must finish this
book and do whatever I need to do in order to complete. I
want to let people know about the harassment cases from
the radio station and fight back. Plus, I really want to see
Jenny. I also believe that she is being traced.
Chapter 14
springs 2003
Since I knew that there was no way that I can get away
from being harassed and spied upon by the radio
business, I create a web site a few months later on the
internet to contact to the whole world.
(www.geocities.com/radiosuit) is the name of my web site.
On the first page of my web site, I shared how the entire
ordeal with me and the radio station started. I was being
followed and traced because someone called the radio
station at my work in the summer of 1999 mentioning
about me. I also gave a warning to the radio business and
Paul AlXX if they don’t stop following me around, stopped
spying on me and talk about me on the air…I will be suing
them for 3 billion dollars or more…plus a $3 million dollar
daily interest if the harassment do not cease. My website is
being utilized as a contact tool to find help and from
lawyers, police, and even the White House Bush for help.
But no response has been received.
I also used my web site to write about how I felt being
spied upon everyday. The list of complaints extends to the
radio station DJs, singers on the radio and Paul al## for
harassments and spying. At the same current time I was
working on my music at home, training my tones, and
practicing my computer graphic program to better prepare
to make a film regarding this ordeal in the near future. I
also thought about some technological ideas to beat Paul
AlXX. An idea I came up with was to use a space satellite
equipped with the wave technology to use laser projectiles
to destroy the tornado and typhoon that we always heard on
the news….Many lives and properties could be saved each
year with this type of technology. All we need just one
satellite in the space and it can share with the whole world.
The radio station also did mention about it on the public air.
I also wrote this on my web site as an evidence of a
technological idea that I will own in a future when I
become a millionaire from this lawsuit so millions of
peoples’ life and property will be saved in the future…
I was watching the news the other night. I heard that
Bush was sending military forces to Iraq. The idea came to
me that U.S. should use spy satellite to watch every spot in
Iraq to protect the army. U.S. can also use special laser
technologies to shoot some kind of chemical from the
satellite that can make people fall asleep so we would just
have to arrest them without harming anyone. Since there
are so much suicide bombings and sniper in the war, this is
the best idea to fight this war from a safety standpoint. I am
not sure if people know what I am talking about…and
nobody will get hurt and no collateral damages. That was
my idea to fight this war…
The radio station was surprised that I had that kind of
ideas to make people fall asleep instead of killing them
through combat. I was talking to the singer in the garage
and radio DJs like usual. The radio also did talk about my
idea on the public air… I thought that my ides can be used
to win World War 3 to me. The radio station was
suggesting me to share my ideas with the White House… If
my idea was use we can save many lives….
That day at noon was a special afternoon to
me…because I usually talk to the dj’s and singer from the
radio station FM 9#.5 or Z10#.3 dj about their spy
equipment in my garage. These are the only two radio
station I listen at most the time. I was listening to fm 9#.5
and I was talking to someone that I never talk to in my
garage before when I have the radio on. He said that he
agrees my technology idea to fight this desert world war 3
and he said a lot of thing that he likes my idea to fight this
war...
He was keep calling me a son
then I said don’t call me a son”
I also ask him how much that the whole world will paid
for my ideas can protect the whole world in the future and
the gas prices….
Then he said am I trying used my web site and all the
creative and technology ideas to beat him and his radio
station….
From this point I already knew that is him. It is Paul
AlXXX. I said that you never know…I am still young and
have that kind of energy to fuck with anyone that fuck with
me and anyone else like you. You are fucking with my
privacy and people around me. I don’t play around if you
play around…you fuck me, I will fuck you up. I will put
my life down to fuck with you…Paul Tiger…you are a
tiger …but I am a dragon….a dragon that don’t give
fuck…I got teeth too…so fuck you..50 billionaire…you
never know that one day people might play stock on my
website to start companies to against your fuck up business
harassment. That was what I told him from what I
remember…
I was watching the news like usual. There were terrorist
that was shooting people in the cities and train station. It
reminded me about the 911 World Trade Center’s terrorist
attack, and I was hoping that I can do something about it. I
had nothing better to do at home in my garage besides
talking to the radio and their spy equipment. I was thinking
to have a weapon that shoots out a needle filled with
anesthetic, used at the hospital to put patients asleep before
surgery, with a CO2 pump that does not need the traditional
amount of gun power to fire a bullet. The size of the
weapon is as small as a like a cigarette box with infrared
laser to aim at its targets. Plus this weapon will have little
computer chips inside so it can connect to the police
computer where the police can track one the shot is fired.
This weapon is also for people that do not like guns or the
idea of shoot to kill. I also designed a video game for
people to practice. If this weapon is readily availability to
the general public, the terrorist or criminal would think
again before attack again. I wrote this technology idea on
my web site as evidence that I own in the future. The radio
station was happy about my technology ideas when I was
talking to them in my garage with their spy equipment
when I had my radio on. Especialy when I was talking to
J.rule, snowdog, Dr.J, chirstina, and more….they all agree
my technology ideas. They were excited about my ideas.
Finally, my sister got married with her boyfriend Eric.
They were going back to Hong Kong with my family. I was
hoping that my family can have a nice trip to back to Hong
Kong to visit. I was thinking about to give up a 3 billion
dollar lawsuit against the radio station years harassment. So
I was talking to the radio station in the garage and I told the
radio station with their spy equipments in my garage. I
would give up the billion dollar lawsuit in the future and I
would like to cooperate to have all my technology and
make a film but I want 3 million dollar for all my
compensation. I also wish to see Jenny again so I can take
her back to Hong Kong with Jenny’s nice parents that we
almost met at my work in the past. I just wish my family
and their family have a great time back to Hong Kong for
several weeks. I also did email to the radio station but they
never give me any respond. In this case, I believe that I
already give them enough chance…
Chapter 15
summer 2003
The hot summer 2003 has come. Finally, I find a job
at a mini market by Clack College; it took so long to
find this job. Since the 911 incident the
Vancouver/Portland area have been hard to find a job. I
Was happy to find a job again, so I can save some money to
work on my record, book, and move back to Seattle to
finish my computer graphic class. I was hoping that I will
see jenny at my work again because she has my social
security number. Most the time I was doing clean up and
restocking at the store. I was working with a Korean guy
name Yun that he just moved from Korea about a year ago.
He doesn’t know much English, he is a totally a nice guy.
Unfortunately, we had a radio at work and the mini mark
store. The owner likes to listen to that fuck up Portland
radio fm 9#.5 because his daughter likes to listen to that
radio station and the min mark store owner doesn’t know
much English either. I had a lot of hard time when I was
working there …( because the radio station have the best
spy equipments and they also have equipments can change
my radio frequency) so they can talk me at my work in that
min mark store when we have the radio on and I couldn’t
shut it off because the owner said that we have to had the
radio on. I was having a lot of hard time at work because
the radio station will make fun of my privacy about what I
did at home and more….About two weeks later, I
remember one night when I was working at the store and I
was very busy doing restocking all the pop and beer. There
was one girl looking at me but I was so busy to stocking the
pop and beer. I was wonder if that was a Jenny for a little
while because she has a black hair and I couldn’t tell if that
was jenny or someone else…because jenny used to had a
blonde hair. She didn’t say hi or anything so I was just keep
working and restocking and then after she left. I heard the
radio at my work was talking to me and they were saying
something that black hair girl was jenny and they couldn’t
believe that I didn’t recognized her again……( because the
radio station have the best spy equipments and they also
have equipments can change my radio frequency)
I got so depress that night when I was working after I
heard that. I was thinking for a little while that black hair
girl does look alike jenny. I just couldn’t recognize her
because she had her hair dye…
I was hoping that she always will stopping by my work
again soon….
After I work at the mini mark store few weeks later, my
co-worker Yun and his friend suggest going to the strip bar
in Portland, so we went to the strip bar had a drink. I heard
a dancer that she was saying something to her friend that
she recognized me that she think it is me that she heard of
me on the radio fm 9#.5 but I didn’t say anything back and
then I just left because I didn’t want no body know that I
went to the strip bar like the radio station talk about that I
went to video porn shop. All this are my personal privacy. I
remember at that time the radio always make fun of me that
I always go to video porn shop on the public air and even
video porn shop manager recognized me from the radio
station talk about me and she even often me a sex and she
said that didn’t mine to give me some but I didn’t take it
and most the time I just annoy her…
I had to quit after working at the mini mark store for
about two months later, because I couldn’t stand that the
radio station. They were saying whole a lots of thing and
making fun of my privacy and get me upset and I couldn’t
turn off the radio at my work because the owner at the store
that he said had to have the radio on and he didn’t know my
situation with the radio business and I didn’t tell him
because I didn’t want him think that I am crazy and most
the time when the radio can talk about me. The store owner
doesn’t know because he doesn’t know much English and
seen alike he doesn’t pay much attention to the radio. Most
the time is the same Dj.CareeryEX and a new DJ that they
hired Dj.flesxx and a DJ. boodXX from that radio fm 9#.5
talk to me and make fun of me on the radio , so finally, I
couldn’t stand it I quite that job. I knew that the radio
station did that on purpose because they knew that I
couldn’t shut off the radio. The most depressing part is that
every time when they using Jenny, talk about Jenny that
being watch by their spy equipments and more…
Then about two weeks later, I stopped by the Charles
bar by my house and I dropped off a little record with one
song there. I gave one of the customer at the bar that she
was talking on the phone at out side the parking lots to give
the little CD to the bartender. A few days later I stopped by
that Charles bar again…I was setting there for 5 minutes
then I gave a little CD with four little song to the customer
right next to my table. I mean that wasn’t really my record
or music. The CD had a few different tones that I can do. I
could do my tones 90% like snowdog, 90% like Dr.J and
90% like couple other singers’ tones that we heard on the
radio. The reason I dropped off a CD at the bar is part of
my evidence that I was trying to work on to sue Paul al###
for harassments. The reason that I only stay at the bar for 5
minutes because I was being trace by the radio station and
Paul al## spy equipments and I didn’t want anyone else get
follow or trace by the radio station spy equipments. That
night when I went home and listened to the radio in my
garage, the radio station told me that Jenny was at the
Charles bar and she was just sitting right next to me….I
thought that I saw someone with black hair look like her
and I was wonder how come she didn’t say hi, so I drove
back to Charles bar, but she was already gone. I got even
more depress that night about that I didn’t recognized her
again and we were so close. I always expect that Jenny still
has a blonde hair. The next following nights, I have been
stopping by the Charles bar but I didn’t see her again….
I also got a respond back from the white house about
paul AlXX radio business harassments, But the white house
didn’t give me any help and told me that I have a mental
problem, I need to take a medication or go see a doctor……
I never been though this depress in my whole life
because I know that I do not have any mental problem, I
called the police, lawyer, mayor, half of the whole
world….and even now to that white house but nobody can
give me any help about that I am being harass on the radio
air, being follow, and spy equipments and more …because
some student or my co-worker called the radio station and
mention about me when I was going college and I also give
you a white house to fight a world war #3 and city war with
my technology ideas with out killing anyone, and the whole
world will agree…
Chapter 16
fall 2003
I started thinking, wishing, and longing that I could live
and lead a peaceful life. However, I can’t help it but to
lead a life of distress because I cannot find a way to rid
myself from being harassed by the radio station; being
continually monitored by all the spy equipment they placed
around me; and being constantly followed. The radio
station, to this day, still talks about me and harasses me on
the public airwaves. I still have not had the chance to see
Jenny yet. The economy is still very bad around
Vancouver, WA, and the Portland area. It is so hard for me
to find a job and to see jenny again. I started thinking about
how to make myself into the news, so I can have a lawsuit
in front of a million people on television. I wanted to let the
whole world know that the radio station has been harassing
me for the past 3 years on the air everyday. They have been
following me around, and placed spy equipment where I
live and go, but nobody can do anything about that. I really
couldn’t think of what else I can do to get away from this
radio station harassment issue.
I found two ways to make news… a) is to kill the radio
DJ, and b) is to blow up the radio station. That way I can
file a huge lawsuit against the radio station and its
harassments since nobody can give me any help about my
situation. This lawsuit is only out of self-defense to
safeguard my personal privacy and the safety of people
around me. I did contact the police ten times in these last
three years, but nobody gave me any help. I also have been
trying to look for lawyers but nobody will take my case. I
emailed the white house and they said that I have mental
problem. I really couldn’t think of anything else that I
could do to get away from the radio harassments. I was
feeling like that I am just being forced to harm the radio
station and the DJ. I started to have a lot of crazy ideas of
how to terrorize the radio station business and to make
news headlines so that I can have a lawsuit against them. I
want to have the lawsuit in front of millions and billions of
people because this is the fastest way to let the whole world
to know about the radio station harassment and Paul al###
unethical business practices.
I couldn’t find a job at that time, and I didn’t have
much money. I was lucky that my parents supported me
with a couple hundred dollars each month to spend on gas,
cigarettes, and to go out once in a while… besides, I was so
broke in that month that I only spent 60-70 dollars buying
pipes and parts from the hardware store. I made a rifle and
a couple bombs. I felt like I was being forced to do so when
I was shopping for these materials. I was thinking that I
could of have my computer graphics degree program done
by now; have a stable job in Seattle as a video production
or video game designer; talk to Jenny everyday; party in
Seattle on the weekend; rollerblade in Seattle down town;
watch movies, see live concerts at the night clubs; and
more… I was feeling like I was being forced to become a
killer, to jump right into the news as a deviant spectacle.
However, I only want to defend my-self, my family, and
people around me. Moreover, I didn’t even want to think
that Jenny was being watched, and I didn’t want her to
learn about the spy equipment and everything that was
going on.
I didn’t like this kind of violence, it kept and coming
back at me when I was making my own rifle and bomb. I
was hoping that somebody would come talk to me like the
police, the FBI, or the White House so they will know what
was going on with the radio station harassment before I did
it. If someone really talked to me and gave me some help,
we could of worked on this radio station harassment issue.
However, nobody did, so I started making a threat on my
web site. I emailed everywhere that I will start to do some
terrorist stuff to Paul AL### businesses and his radio
stations. I needed to do that so that I could be on the news
and file a huge lawsuit to all the system of companies that
are related to Paul AL###.
It was the end of the September in 2003. I still haven’t
had a chance to see Jenny yet. The radio business still has
spying equipment placed all around me. I am still being
followed, and I still can talk to the DJ through their spy
equipment in my garage. There were many times that the
DJ got really mad because I started calling them radio shit.
One night, on the 4th of October of 2003, I had the radio
on in my garage while I was fixing my home made rifle. I
was listening and talking to the DJ through their spy
equipment in my garage. We kind of had a little argument,
and I kept calling that DJ radio shit. That DJ got really mad
and told me they had guns, that they have a lot of guns, and
I should stop calling them radio shit. About 10 to 15
minutes later, it was about 12:15 AM, I heard a car drove
by followed by a gunshot outside of my home garage. It
was very loud and it sounded like a shotgun. The radio was
still on in my garage and the DJ was telling me that it was a
warning to me. I got even more pissed off. The next thing I
did was to send emails to all of Paul alxxx’s related
businesses such as radio stations and TV channels. I told
them to turn in a tape from the spy satellite that has been
filming the world, and reveal to me who tried to threaten
me by shooting a shotgun outside of my house. The U.S
government also has a spy satellite that has been filming
the whole world, and that 50 billion worth billionaire Paul
alXXX has one too. Paul alxxx has the best technology in
the world, so I give them about a week to send me the tape.
If I don’t get the tape, I will start blowing up Paul alXXX’s
businesses to get on the news and to let everybody know
how fucked up are Paul Alxxx’s businesses.
Few days later, I was being very impatience about
getting the tape from them, so I told the DJ through the spy
equipment they installed in my garage to meet me at the
Charles bar, the radio was also turned on. I also emailed
them telling them to meet me at Charles bar. So I stopped
by the Charles bar that night, first when I walked in the bar,
I asked the security guard by the door if there were any
DJs’ from the radio station FM 9X.5. Then the security
guard told me that “he doesn’t think so, the radio station
FM 9x.5 DJ is usually at the Cold Shot bar every Thursday
nights”. I stayed at the Charles bar for a little bit and had a
drink. That night, I saw a co-worker that I used to work
with, her name is Sharon. She was drinking with her friends
at the bar, so I went up and talked to her for a little bit. The
DJ didn’t show up that night. I went home and turned the
radio on again in my garage. The DJ was telling me
something about Sharon. I got so mad, because it basically
means that there is another victim being traced or spied on.
Sharon is a very nice girl. I was feeling so bad.
Since, the Charles’ bar security let me know that the
radio station FM 9x.5 DJ was always at the Cold Shot bar
every Thursday nights, I stopped by the cold Shot bar the
following Thursday night. I was talking to the security
guard at the door. I told the security that I am here to make
news and I am also supposed to pick up a tape or a check
from the radio DJ harassments, if he has ever heard of me.
The security won’t let me go inside. So I told the security
that I am here for pay back and I will be back. Then I gave
the security a bullet from a shotgun rifle and told him to
give this bullet to the radio station DJ and tell them that I
will be back. I left and went home. I turned the radio on in
my garage, but this time nobody talked to me through their
spy equipment. About an hour later, at 1:00am in the
morning, someone called my house, it was my friend
Bryan. He works for the radio business as a DJ. Bryan told
me that he was at the club that night; he told me that the
issue was a misunderstanding, and that the DJ wants to
meet me. But I told him to fuck off, that I didn’t want to
meet them, I just want the tape or a check. Then I told
Bryan to never call my house that late again because he
was waking everybody up at the house.
Two weeks later, that was around the end of October
2003. I didn’t get the tape from the radio station or any
response to my e-mail about the radio station harassment,
and I still haven’t seen Jenny. On one afternoon, I had the
radio on in my garage, the radio station’s DJ was saying
that they have a billion dollar check ready for me, and told
me to come by and pick it with the condition that I don’t
blow them up or shoot them up. I had a bad feeling about
going to the radio station, it can be dangerous or it could be
a set up, but it doesn’t really matter… it is about the end of
what I have to do. However, I do want some people to
come with me to the radio station just in case something
happens. I really didn’t know who should I ask because
there were spy equipment everywhere and I didn’t want
any more people to lose their privacy or being followed, so
I was thinking that maybe I should stop by a strip club or
bar, and talk to some strip girls to come with me to the
radio station. I went back to a strip club that I went with my
friend a few months ago. I was looking for that one girl that
recognized me and had heard the DJ talk about me on the
air. She also told me that she likes to sing. I didn’t see her
again at the club, so I meet other few strip girls and I told
them what happen about my situation with the radio
business harassment and I needed some people that don’t
care much about their privacy to come with me to the radio
station to pick up a check. So the next day, we met at the
Lloyd center mall and then we went to the Portland radio
station Fm 9#.5. That was very late in evening; it was about
8:00pm when we got to the radio station. There was no one
there. I saw a man outside the radio station and then I told
him that I am here to pick up a check. Then he took me to
the radio studio and there were two DJs there. I asked them
where my check was. They told me to come back tomorrow
during the day time because the office was already closed. I
left the radio station and told those girls that they should
leave first because I got something to do. Then I went to a
store near the radio station. I had the radio on in my car, I
was talking to the DJ and I told them through their spy
equipment planted somewhere around me that I am coming
back to get some deposit and make sure that I will get paid
tomorrow. I will be turning the radio station over tonight to
make sure I get paid tomorrow. I set all my tools ready. I
went back to the radio station after 15 minutes. When I got
there, there were two police cars outside the radio station.
So I didn’t do anything and just drove off.
The next morning, on the way over to the radio station,
I stopped by the police office in Portland downtown and
told the police at the counter about what happened between
me and the radio station and asked the police if they can
come with me to the radio business to pick up a check. I
need someone to go inside with me just incase if that it was
a set up. But the police refused to go with me, so I left. On
the way to the radio station, I saw two police cars parked
outside of a restaurant and they were chatting or taking a
break. I went up to them and told the police what happened
between me and the radio business and then I asked the
police if they can come with me to the radio business to
pick up a check. But they refused and told me that they
didn’t want to get involved or get sued. Then they drove off
with out giving me any help. About 10 minutes later, I got
to the radio station. There were four police cars outside the
radio business and then I got pulled over. It was the same
police officer that I was talking to 10 minutes ago. They
made me stay in the car and then the police and the radio
station manager came to talk to me. The manager was
being very mean and told me that I am not welcome to
come back here again. I then asked him for his name, but
he was being very mean and told me “I am not going to tell
you,” then he walked away. The police then came to talk
me, but the police won’t let me explain my situation that I
have been harassed by the radio station in the past few
years. The police was just kept telling me that I have a
mental problem and gave me a lot of shit and told me to
leave.
I was so mad about the radio station manager and at the
police for not doing their job. The police won’t let me
explain my situation; they were supposed to arrest the radio
DJ for harassing me and more… my mom had a very
stressed expression when I got home. She told me that
some radio station manager just called our house and told
my mom that they never had talked about me or harassed
me on the radio and told my mom that I have a mental
problem; that I needed to see a doctor. My mom was
worried that I might get in trouble around here… so she
suggested me to move back to Seattle and stay with my
sister since she just moved to a new house in the Seattle
Redmond area and she has an extra room for me to stay for
little while…
In the middle of November, I moved back to Seattle
Redmond area and then I found a job the next day. I was
working for the same bar Lucky7 that I used to work in
around the Kirkland area. I was very excited to see jenny
again because she has my social security number... every
time when I have the radio on in Seattle, whether in my car
or at my sister’s house when I am by my-self, I still can talk
to the DJ because they have the ability to change radio
frequencies with their frequency changing equipment and
other spy equipment all around me. Most the time they
were just making fun of my privacy and tried to piss me
off… I really don’t know what else that I can do about my
situation since nobody was giving me any help. The only
thing that I can do is to make big news and to get
everybody’s attention and have a lawsuit against Paul alxxx
businesses in front of the whole world…
So I started making a lot of threats on my web site and
plus I was about to blow up some of Paul alxx’s related
business in Seattle and I just live a few blocks away from
one of the computer companies that he used to own. I also
made threats to the White House and Bush for not helping
me out with my situation. I was hoping that I can make
news in front of the whole world, so I can file a lawsuit to
Paul alxxx’s radio station and to get away… but I just got a
job and I know that I will see jenny again as soon as my job
reports to the social security office when I get my
paycheck… so it stopped me doing this… I just really want
to see jenny first and see what she says about it….
Few days later, that was right before thanksgiving of
the afternoon… I got pulled over by four Redmond police
about two blocks away from my sister’s house when I was
on the way home. They were searching my car and took me
back to my sister’s house to search if there were any bombmaking
materials… thank God that they didn’t find
anything. Then they took me to the Seattle police station in
Seattle downtown, the Seattle police told me that they got a
report from the Portland police to place me under arrest.
The Seattle police questioned me for a couple hours about
what was the reason that I wanted to make a threat to Paul
ALxx and the White House… then I told them that I just
tried to get help and attention because I have been having a
trouble with the Paul alxxx radio station’s business
harassing me on the air, following me, and planting spy
equipment, and more during these past few years. I
contacted to the Portland and Vancouver police more than
10 times but nobody worked on it. I contacted to all the
lawyers in that area but nobody wanted to take my case… I
emailed to the court house but they didn’t give me any
help, I emailed to the mayor but they never gave me a
response, I emailed to the white house but the white house
just gave me some shit saying that they think I have a
mental problem… I just didn’t know what else that I can
do…
But it seemed like the Seattle police didn’t care much
about my situation and about the radio station harassments.
The police cared more about the radio station… I was being
charged for harassment and threat to bomb. I was in the
Seattle King county jail waiting for judgment day. The next
day, there were two FBI officers who came to the jail and
questioned me for a while. They questioned me again about
what was the reason that I made threats to the White House,
President Bush, and Paul alxx. Then I told them what
happened again… that someone called the radio station the
year of 1999 when I was going Clark College, somehow it
got the radio station’s attention, and the radio station started
harassing me on the air and following me with spy
equipment and more… I contacted to the local police but
nobody worked on it and no lawyer will take my case. So I
resorted to emailing the White House but the White House
gave me some shit that I was having a mental problem… so
I threat to make news to get help and attention…
I told those FBI agents to give me some help and work
on the case, but the FBI told me that they were not there to
help me…
Then the private defender came and talked to me in jail.
The private defender asked me if I had witnesses whom had
heard of the Portland radio station DJ talk about me or
harass me on the air… she will get me out the jail in few
days… so I told the private defender to make a phone call
to the Vancouver Clark college Security Office to find the
supervisor Victor and Jenny. Plus, I told the private
defender that to make a phone call to the Portland radio
station Fm 9x.5 to find out all the information. Then the
next day, the private defender came back to talk to me
again… she said that she called the Clark college Security
Office but they play the first plea that not to give out any
information. She also called the radio station and they said
that they never had talked about me on the air or harassed
me… which the radio station was lying…
Because I didn’t have anyone else that can be a witness
to prove that the radio station did talk about me on the air…
the judge thought that I have a mental problem, by
Washington state law, I am not competent to stand for trial.
The judge orders me to go to the Western State Hospital for
mental treatment to determine whether I can stand for trial.
I was being sent back and forth between King county jails
in Seattle and the Western State Hospital in Tacoma. I was
being locked up for so long because the doctor at the
hospital called the Portland radio business and talked to the
radio station manager… the radio manager said that they
never had harassed me or talked about me on the air or
Jenny… and the radio manager also said that I have been
harassing them and made threats to the DJ at the club and
more… so the doctor thought that I was a dangerous person
and that I have a mental problem… I also told the doctor
that I have been trying to have a huge lawsuit against
them… the radio station are lying… but the doctor won’t
believe whatever I said.
When I was in Seattle king county jail, I was very
depressed most the time. The only thing that made me feel
batter is thinking about Jenny. I also had the thought that
Jenny will come to jail to see me, and that she will be my
witness to prove that the radio station did talk about me. I
thought she will come and get me out of the jail because
she has my social security number, plus she should know
where I am at. I also thought about the radio station
business screwing up my life a lot. I thought how unfair is
the law and the police for not helping me and more. The
law is only here to protect the rich people.
I don’t play chess, I don’t play cards, and I don’t watch
much TV. I spent most of my time sleeping a lot because I
was so depressed that it was the only way I can feel better
when I was in jail. When Sleeping, I try to always dream of
Jenny. I realized some people using the jail as a home; and
some will commit suicide because they couldn’t stand that
kind of loneliness for being locked up… jail is a very
lonely place, a lot of people rather do real time in prison
because, at least in prison, people can have the chance to go
out to the yard, work out, play basketball, and go to class to
learn something everyday. On top of that, people locked up
in prison have way better food. So I believe that this is part
of the reason why a lot of people in jail would rather just
plea guilty at the court and move on to prison. I was good
friends with everybody when I was in jail in every tank… I
was friends with all types of people, black, Mexican, white,
Asian and sometimes they made me rap because I can rap
like Snowdog and Dr. J back and forth… they even
suggested that I should have a record come out. While in
jail, we have the same nasty piece of ham and cheap-cheese
sandwich for lunch everyday, and a nasty dinner that never
can fill anyone’s stomach up. Everybody was always
hungry in jail. I was very lucky that I have my family come
visit me once a week and put money in my jail account so
that I can order from the commissary shampoo, underwear,
corn chips, cake, candy, and juice once a week… I ordered
a lot of food every time when I order. Every night around at
8:30pm I will open one or two bag of chips to share with
everybody in the tank… especially to those people that
didn’t have any family or friends that came to visit them or
dropped money off their account… I felt bad for them…
everybody that I knew in the Seattle jail and the Western
State Hospital said that they never had met an Asian guy
that cool. I was very much getting along with everybody
when I was in jail. I only had two fights when I was locked
up in jail and the Western State Hospital. The first time I
got into a fight was when I was in jail because I couldn’t
stand that my Asian friend was getting beat up so I jumped
in the fight and then I ended up getting beat up too. When
we were on the ground someone threw me a sharp pencil as
a weapon. The second fight was when I and a couple of my
friends couldn’t stand one guy’s attitude, he didn’t show
anybody respect and fucked with everybody… so I and
couple people beat him up… after 14 months of being
locked up in jail and the criminal mental hospital… I
finally got out at the end of February of 2005… by law, I
have to stay with my family for a while and plus I have to
go see a doctor every once in a while….
When I got back from Vancouver, WA, the first thing
that I really wanted to do was to see Jenny… I had the
Portland fm 9x.5 radio turned on in my garage at home
again… the radio DJ Carryex and DJ FleeX were talking to
me and they were making fun of me that I was trying to
fuck with them and got my-self in jail… (Because the radio
station had the best spy equipment and they also have
equipment that can change my radio frequency).
I wanted to see Jenny so bad, I couldn’t help but to
think about Jenny and long to see her even though I know
that the entire entertainment business are fucking with me. I
started emailing to the other Portland radio station Z10X.3
to see if they help me send a message on the air to find
jenny. Then the radio DJ told me that they were related and
that they know that as soon as I see jenny again, I can have
a witness to file a huge lawsuit against them. They also said
that they and the boss want to see how my story goes
next…
After 14 months of jail time, the radio station still
didn’t leave me alone, they still have spy equipment around
me, and I am still being followed… obviously, I cannot
blow them up to jump on the news… so I emailed the local
news companies and I told them to put me on the news
because I was in jail for attempting to blow up Paul
Alxxx’s radio station, made threats against the White
House, and Bush… but they never gave me a response… I
thought that the reason why they never replied to my emails
was because the news companies and radio stations were
related entertainment businesses. If I am on the news, Paul
Alxxx’s businesses will be in a big trouble because
everybody will know about their harassment, and plus I can
file a huge lawsuit against them.
So the best way solution I though of is to have a book
come out to let everybody know about Paul alxx, and his
radio station harassments. Moreover, I can find the
witnesses that have heard the DJ talk about me in the
past… unfortunately, I can’t write well in English, I have
grammar problems. I also felt that Jenny should know more
about this true story, so I was hoping to see Jenny again,
that way we both can work on this book. I did my best to
annoy the radio station’s spy equipment that followed me
or other people around me. I also start not to turn on the
radio that way I can feel better. I registered for a class the
following summer quarter of 2005 at Clark College. My
goal was to see Jenny again, because Jenny has my social
security number and that should allow her know where I
am at. I was taking a P.E class at Clark. Everyday was a
hope to see jenny again when I go to my P.E class, but I
will get very disappointed every time when I get out my
class because jenny didn’t come see me. Sometime I will
get very depressed.
I dropped off a letter to the Clark College security
office, I told them what happened to me with the radio
station harassment issue, and that I went to jail because I
tried to stop the radio station from harassing me. I also told
them that I hoped to meet Jenny again so I could file the
lawsuits against the radio station and Paul alxxx… but I
didn’t get any response from the security office or heard
anything from Jenny.
Chapter 17
fall of 2005- spring of 2006
Fall of 2005, because I didn’t have much money so I
did not register for any classes for Clark College.
Instead, I apply for a school finical aid, but it took few
months to get it. Every week, I was still e-mailing to
different radio stations and sending messages to meet Jenny
at the Charles bar every Friday at 9; 30pm. Even though I
know radio station is related to fm 9X.5 and they won’t
help me but it just a hope every week that I can feel better.
I never saw Jenny at the Charles bar. Most the time in that
fall, I was trying to look for some friend that I used to know
in Vancouver, but I couldn’t find any of them because I lost
contact with them since I move to Seattle. Plus I didn’t
really know many people around. Sometimes I will go to
the club and try to meet people to see if they have heard of
me from the radio station in 2000-2003 to be my witness to
file a lawsuit, but I didn’t find the right people to talk to, ,
most or them don’t listen to radio station Fm 9X.5 and plus
it has been for couple years. Most people have already
forgotten about me.
Winter of 2005, I got my financial aid to go back to
Clark College. I register for couple English classes. I was
hoping that Jenny will come to see me because she knows
my social security number. Everyday I will get really exited
to go back to school but I will also get really depress and
disappointed when I get off school everyday because Jenny
didn’t come to see me. I met a classmate in my English
class, and his name is Ruby. He was one of the cool
Americans that I met. I told him a little bit about the radio
station harassments. Then he suggest me to contact to FCC,
maybe they will do something about it. So I contacted the
FCC, but the FCC told me that if I have a personal issue
with the radio station business, I have to find my own civil
lawyer. I also asked them if they will have a copy of what
the radio station Dj did broadcast on the air, so I can have
the evidence that the radio station did harass me on air in
the year of 2000-2003. But the FCC said that they did not
have it. I tried to contact many civil attorneys in the
Portland and Vancouver, but none of the attorneys will take
my case, because they never had a case like this. Finally, I
only have one Portland attorney told me that I should find
the witness that have heard of me first, then it will be a lot
easier to work on this case to file a lawsuit to against the
radio station.
It was about the end of the spring quarter, Jenny didn’t
come see me. So the only thing that I can do is to talk to the
Clark college security office that Jenny used to work at.
Even though that I really didn’t like to bother the Clark
college security office again. I went to the security office,
but the supervisor Victor was already gone, he didn’t work
there no more. So I talk to the new supervise Mike but he
doesn’t know anything about the radio station harassment
and they didn’t have any information of where to find
Jenny because she had been gone for a long time.
Spring of 2006. I didn’t register for any class because I
couldn’t focus at all.
So I found a job at a restaurant as a cook.. I was hoping
that I will see Jenny again because she has my social
security number. Since I got that job, Everyday is a new
hope to see Jenny when I get to work. Every night I will get
very depress because Jenny didn’t came see me. After I
was working there for two months, I start wonder if I will
see Jenny again. So the best thing for me to do is to write a
book to find all the witness that has heard of me to file the
lawsuit to the radio station. So I told the manger that I only
want to work at the restaurant two or three night a week. So
I can have time to work on this book and plus still have a
hope to see jenny while I am working there. Unfortunately,
I had the worse kitchen manager that I ever had; he was
rude and never cared about any other people. I would say
that he is the worse co-worker to work with and he just laid
me off, and hired someone new. After I got lay off, I tried
my best to control my sadness feeling about the radio
station harassments, and I believe that is part of the reason
that I wish Jenny can be my writer because she can make
me feeling better. I started working on my book with a ruff
draft and went around to clubs to meet people who can help
me to write this book. But I couldn’t get Jenny out of my
head when I tried to meet some lady to be my writer. I
didn’t want someone else messing up this special love
because I know that I will see Jenny again.
So finally I found a good friend of mine who can help
me with my book. I also find an underground hip-hop
rapper who can help me to write couple songs. The reason
that I want to have few song come out is to prove that the dj
and the singers on that radio station is not all that, a lots of
underground singer are way better then the radio station.
They don’t have any right to screw up anyone’s’
privacy. I also think that some people might wonder how
my tones and voice are like….so please check out my web
site (www.geocities.com/radiosuit) my music page to check
out my music...
This book will be continued… as soon as I find about
20-30 witnesses that have heard of the Portland radio FM
9x.5 or other radio station that violated my privacy by talk
about me on the air on the year (2000-2003) about how I
was looking for Jenny, how I am an Asian skater, want me
to be a singer or actor, make up rumor that I used be an
gangster, and also that I like to do girl in the ass and other
sexual harassments and more…I also will give a reward to
any witnesses that can prove the Portland radio station did
harass me in the past. The reward will be $10,000 for each
million dollar that I get from the radio station for years of
harassment lawsuit, if I can get a billion dollar from this
lawsuit, you will get a million dollar and up to 70 % will be
donated to around the world. I may also work on a movie
about of this Paul alxxx radio station and the entire
entertainment harassments story. This book and movie will
be showing around the world to let people to know the truth
about Paul Alxxx business harassments….
-----------------------------------------------------------
A Special Message
To The Oregon And Vancouver Wa Reader Or Audiences
I have talk to the lawyer about the radio station
harassments case. I can have a few lawsuits to the Portland
radio station Fm 9#.5 and other radio stations…but I need
about 20-30 witness or listeners that can prove the Portland
radio station Dj did talk about me on the air in the year (
2000-2003) as that I have been looking for Jenny, talking
about that I am Asian skater, went to Clark college, make
up rumor that I used to be a gangster, talk about me like to
do girl in the ass, also about me that want me to be a singer
or actor or more…more…
1. million$ lawsuit to the radio station that have been
over harassing me on air as sexual predator, and as
vulgar as it sound, says things about me like to do
girl’s in the ass, tracing me around by technologic
means, which I wounded up going to the hospital
few times in between, after being so depress from
what they were doing in year of 2000-2003
2. million$ lawsuit to the radio station Fm 9#.5…I got
in a fight with the radio station Dj to stop the
harassments (11/2003) they called the police on me
and said that I was harassing them. I was being
locked up in jail and hospital for 14 months. I was
supposed to be release in few days. I was being
locked up because the radio DJ and manager was
lying that they never had harass me on the air, or
talk about me on the air and said that I was
harassing them…the doctors thought that I had
mental problems and the judge sentenced me to jail
and hospital for 14 months….
3. million $ lawsuit to the police department…I had
complain to the Vancouver and Portland police
more then 10 times in the year of 2000-2003 about
the radio station harassments on the air and tracing
me around but no further work from the police or
authorities have even begun to start on my
complaint.
4. million $ lawsuit to the western state hospital doctor
for not believe what I told them about the radio
station harassments on the air or talk about
me….and wrongfully locked me up at the
hospital…
5. billion $ lawsuit to the radio station Fm 9#.5. I have
a web site that contains evidence that I did give the
radio station a warning in the year of 2002-2003 if
the radio station business doesn’t stop their
harassment on the air. I will sue the radio station
and Paul alXXX for 3 billion$$$ and more…the
radio station didn’t stop their harassment and plus
make fun of my web site or talk about it on the air
as a radio show…
I really wish that I can get some help!!! All you have to
hear is that the Portland radio station Dj did talk about me
on the air in the year of (2000-2003) as that I have been
looking for Jenny, talking about that I am an Asian skater,
gangster, talking about me like to do girl in the ass, also
about me that want me to be a singer or actor or
U.S Portland Radio Station Harassments
more…Please e-mail me at ( [email protected]) if
you be the witness can prove the radio station did talk
about me on the air at the court, you will compensated $
10,000 from each million $ that I get from this lawsuits, if I
get a billion$$ you will compensated a million$ from my
lawsuit. And plus I will be possibly working on this movie
with local professional film production company about this
true story and I need about 100 volunteer from Portland,
Vancouver and Seattle area to be an actor in this film. This
true story will go around in U.S and other countries…
************************************************
A Special Message To Jenny…
if you are reading my book…back in the days you
didn’t know what I be though now you know…I am so
sorry about that I didn’t recognized you when You came
see me in the past and all these special day as your
birthday, my birthday, new year, Christmas, valentine days
that I didn’t have chance to tell you that I love you in these
last 8 years since the day we met…but in these 8 years. I
have been waiting to see you again. I have not stopped
thinking about you…you are always like an angel in the
night in the dark always flying in my head…I hope that I
will see you again soon…you can e-mail me(
[email protected])or I will meet you at Charles bar at
every Monday night at 9:30pm…as soon as I see you
again…I will kick Paul Alxxx and all their asses…I can’t
wait can take you and your nice parents to Hong Kong for
visiting and around the world….if…if you are seeing
someone else…I still hoping that you will have contact
with me or meet me at Charles bar at every Monday night
at 9:30 pm…I just hope that at less that I can ask you a four
questions are very….very…very important….
************************************************
************************************************
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represent the opinions or thoughts of the publisher. The author represents and warrants
that s/he either owns or has the legal right to publish all material in this book.
U.S Portland Radio Station Harassments
All Rights Reserved.
Copyright © 2007 ChiHa
V 1.0
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PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
It was the summer of 99, about four years ago. I am not sure it was the radio station 9$ FM or 1$$ FM. I didn’t listen to the radio station that much because most the time I listen to my own CDs or my own cassette tapes that I recorded. I heard the radio stations were making fun of someone; about a person’s race, hair, tattoo, style, personality, etc. The way they described the looks were similar to me. I also heard the rumors related to my work and school on the radio station. The untruth statements on the air were against my personal life and my right to privacy. I didn’t know what was going on. All I know is that I was a very quiet person and that I was just still learning what is U.S like.
Due to the rumors, I was harassed when I went out and when I was trying to go back to College the following fall. I had to move to Seattle and stay away from all the troubles. I was feeling a little depressed about the radio station statements and the judgments they expressed about me on the air. The first week in Seattle, I got jobs at different restaurants during the daytime and during evening hours at a mall store. About a few weeks later, I was feeling like I was being watched when I was working at the mall during the evenings and also when I was working at the restaurant in the morning. People around me were mentioning to each other about what I was doing at my house. I started to realize there was a spy camera or spying equipment at my house. I knew that something was going wrong and that was how I got started being a paranoiac.
I talked to a co-worker of mine at my evening work about that I was being watched and spy equipments were going and actively recording me at the house. I also told my co-worker what was happening with the radio station business. My co-worker complained to the manager about my situation and I was also feeling depressed. My managers send me home and also called the police that there were spy cameras and that I was being watched. The police came to my house and then sent me to the hospital because I was feeling depressed. When I was at the hospital the doctor made a few phone calls to the Clark College and to the Portland Radio Station and asked them if they did mention anyone similar to me but the radio station business was lying and gave the untrue statement to the doctor. The doctor thought that I was having some mental problem; I had to stay at the hospital and they made me sign up a form stating that I couldn’t ever go back to Clark College or try to see someone again. I couldn’t sleep for four days straight and that was how my chemical unbalance depression broke out.
March/14/03
I was in the hospital few weeks, I never been though that sickliness in my whole life, even I was taking sleeping pills, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't breath, stomah hurted, My shoulder were feeling alike 50 pounds on each side. My mind was so drug out from the strong depression medication treatments.
when I got out from the hospital. Fortunately, I had family in Seattle area, could take care of me. Otherwise, I had to stay at the hospital a longer. I had to stay with my sister and my brother in law( was sister's boyfriend ). I had to take medication treatmnet and I had to have meeting with psychiater every few weeks by law. I was so depressed and my mind was unclear about the judements and statements about me on the air from the radio when I was in town before I moved to Seattle, I was being traced, and I scared Jenny and I didn't get a chance to talked to her at the last time at school because of my voice and deep accent, when I was just realized being traced in Seattle.
The only thing in my mind can think of to make myself better is that how I meet Jenny( A first American girl I meet by myself ), her voice tells me that she likes me and we in love each other since the first time we meet when she walked by everytime. It is that her little voices in my heart keeps me go on and go on, keeps myself and believed that I will see you again soon..... March/20/2003
I was working at the restaurant as a cook few day a week and work at the Outlet clothes store few night a week, and I was just start going back to College in Seattle area at the summer of 2000. I was going for two years computer graphic course and than about to take some autoshop. I was start learning art from the computer graphic, I like animations and the depression medication even got me more drug out on art. I was still seeing psychiater every few weeks. I was still tried to talk with psychiater to make a phone call to the Clark College Security Office for me at least to let Jenny know that didn't mean to scared her at the last time at school but my psychiater never done me this favor...
One of the beautiful night of almost at the end of the summer 2000, I was working at the outlet clothes store by Seattle area. I think that... I saw Jenny again...I wasn't sure??? I was wonder if my dream finally came true that I have been praying for almost every 15 to 20 minutes for a year...I wasn't sure??? maybe my imagination because she has been always in my head all the time and I know that I will see her again...
March/27/03
After her, her friend and her mom lift at the outlet Store.
I was wonder if I was too sicked or something??? My mind was even more thinking about her and I won't never forget how her mom was staring at me over at the counter acted alike I was owing her a lots of money... My mind so confuess about everything and expecialy what was happening at that time when I just moved to Seattle...Two weeks later, I really couldn't be focus work on my school final project anymore!!! I was looking on the internet, I find a Portland radio station web address and I believed it was the radio station that made fun of me at that time when before I moved to Seattle. This is how I start E-mailed to the radio station for a fovar to drop my misunderstood mental case and help me to see someone that I wish can see for a long...long time! I called the radio many times but they hang up on me. I tried to meet Jenny many times but the radio station never said my message from my e-mailed to the min-night dedication and just made fun of it at that time. I had the internet connection problem to listen to the Portland radio, most the time I had to work or going school. I had problems to listen to the Portland radio in Seattle because of different areas. Most the time I listen to techno music because since I got out from the hospital, so manytimes, so many nights when I was listen to the Seattle radio FM 1$$, I heard the DJ would said something about someone are similar to me what I was doing at my house...
so most the time, I listen to my own music and I also believed that I was being chased but the strong medication and my depression got me so drug out...
April/4/03
Will be containued next week by Friday April 11, whenever I am ready to have this long true law suit story.
Thankyou for visiting my web site
(This Is My Special Message to the radio business owner)
Since about two years ago, it was the year 2001, and summer was showing its glorious shimmering sun. When I was really find out there was a spy equipments has be tracing me and about
A Year ago, summer of 2001 and winter of 2002, I went to the hospital again and again because
I couldn’t stand the harassments. I also had complained to the radio business, 90% of attorneys, the court house, Clark College, and half the world about that the radio business mentally attempted to murder me because they already knew that I had a bad depression problem and I couldn’t stand the harassments behind the radio station. I decided to sue and that the owner should paid me 3 billion dollars or more and the radio station should stop the business of harassment, sexual harassment, reputation harassments, put words in my mouth on the air, uses my personal life, human rights, privacy, and placing all sorts of spying equipments at my house. They were using me as entertainment by making it as a radio show, making money off from me year and after year. I couldn’t start my Filming Production and records Company, radio station, or following on business because of the radio station harassments.
The people related to the radio station business attempted to murder me. In another legal case, they and tried stealing creative ideas that are mine, and they should get some punishments by law. I already gave you radio station owners a warning for a year and years and your chances.
Please check out the date of my writing page ( March/21/03 ) lowermost interest rate that you can get for my pay check or checks
Just leave me, my family and my girls alone, you fuck with me Paul Al$$$
, Fuck you! I ina't got nothing but my spirit.