Homer: "Marge, you're my wife and I love you very much, but you're living in a world of make believe with flowers and bells and leprechauns and magic frogs with funny little hats."
Homer: "If something is hard to do, then it's not worth doing."
Homer: "Oh, Lisa. You and your stories. 'Bart is a vampire.' 'Beer kills brain cells.' Now, let's all go back to that... building thingy... where our beds and TV... is."
Homer: "I paid for a colossal doughnut and I'm gonna get a colossal doughnut!!!"
Homer: "I'm livin' in a cuckoo clock!!!"
Homer: "Lisa, vampires are make believe. Just like elves, gremlins, and eskimos."
Homer: "Kids, your daddy and his daddy are involved in a very sticky, nutty, chewy, chocolatey -- put it away, boy! -- situation." (Thanks to "tim" for his correction on this one.)
Ralph Wiggum: "My cat's name is mittens."
Ralph Wiggum: "Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder."
Ralph Wiggum: "The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger outta there."
Ralph Wiggum: "My cat's breath smells like cat food."
Ralph Wiggum: "Chicken necks?"
Ralph Wiggum: "I heard your dad went to a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant."
Ralph Wiggum: "Principal Skinner, I got carsick in your office."
Ralph Wiggum: "When the doctor said I didn't have worms anymore, that was the happiest day of my life!"
Ralph Wiggum: "When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University!"
Grandpa Simpson: "This elevator only goes to the basement. And someone made an awwwwwful mess down there."
Grandpa Simpson: "I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missouri."
Grandpa Simpson: "Quit yer daydreamin', Melonhead!"
Groundskeeper Willie: "Me mule wouldn't work in the mud. So, I had to put seventeen bullets in 'im."
Groundskeeper Willie: "I've watered 'er down as far as she'll go! I cannot water no more!"
Groundskeeper Willie: "I did not cry when me own father was hung for stealin' a pig. But I'll cry now."
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