I am (by no stretch of the imagaination) Ozymandias, King of Kings. Look upon my works, ye idle, and wince.
I-wouldn't-exactly-call-this "Soul Reaver in Brief" (or lack thereof)
Once upon a time, there lived a vampire named Raziel, who was given to wearing leather pants (and no shirt), like his daddy and brothers.
Picture this:
Daddy Kain (see his pants and sword!),
And young Raziel, who's glum because he's expecting nasty things...
Especially after the silly boy shows off his pretty new wings to his wingless daddy...
Who quite naturally just has to try out his new kite with his other kids (wouldn't you also?)
"Quick, toss him up to catch the wind!"
"Grr...this isn't working. Maybe I shouldn't have yanked out the wing bones first."
Alas, as they were playing too close to that dreadful place known as The Lake Of The Dead, a handy portal to the Abyss, poor Raziel went "plop" right in.
Ouch! So he wakes up to find himself....
Gutless, pants-less, without balls or lower jaw. At least you can't call him a dick anymore...
But notice: now that he's got twice as much spine...he's mad and wants his revenge!
Fin
(I really wish I could tell you what happened to his clothes, since his cape, gauntlets and boots seem to have survived the descent...)
Feel free to protest my version of events here - qwertyuiop_roach at yahoo dot com.
Nice picture isn't it? Beware of spoiler and too much information below.
For some reason, in spite of the many close-up views of his posterior you get during gameplay, no one seems to have made any screencaps of those. Still, this picture, apart from being very pretty, also offers you an extraordinarily clear reflection of his pert derriere on the floor. I only wish mine was as nice...sigh.
Other pictures I wish I had but couldn't find:
Kain with the wing-bones in his hands as Raziel falls forward.
While he's lying on the ground at the bottom of the lake, before he recovers consciousness.
SPOILER FOR SOUL REAVER 2
Raziel impaled on the Soul Reaver. Tell me, where else can you FIND a character who screams "ARE YOU ENJOYING THIS?" at the guy whose sword he's impaled on?