pelajari how to stop feeling like a victim so you can start creating your kehidupan.
Stop playing the victim and take charge of your kehidupan.
My past involved a lot of chaos and trauma.
However, I’ve realized that my suffering isn’t that much different than anyone else’s.
We all have obstacles to overcome and we all know orang who have been hurt more than us.
At times I wanted to believe my pain was greater, but I’ve been challenged to embrace the notion that suffering is ordinary.
Still, I frequently find myself facing a choice between victim mentality versus empowered thinking.
How I choose to see my kehidupan carries far greater weight than reality itself.
“We could spend weeks, months, even years … trying to ubah our attitudes and behaviors and not even begin to approach the phenomenon of ubah that occurs spontaneously when we see things differently.” —Stephen R. Covey, “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective orang”
It might be easier if perspective and reality were the same thing but they’re not.
One situation can be viewed multiple ways by multiple orang, as well as by the same person.
I think when the consequences of feeling like a victim are negative enough, we’re forced to adopt a different mindset.
I allow myself to feel abandoned and neglected.
Someone may reject me, but I decide to feel rejected and maybe even unloved and unlovable.
If I indulge the bad emotions long enough, I may even progress to feeling hopeless.
In victim mentality, I believe the world will jangan pernah be a safe place to let down my guard.
Rarely do I feel happy, because there’s no room for happiness under the umbrella of victim mentality.
I am not saying don’t feel your feelings.
We must feel our feelings or we will have to work very berat to keep them buried and repressed with substance and process addictions, or other means of escape.
We need to honor our feelings and acknowledge the wounded parts of ourselves.
The tricky part is not allowing our feelings to overshadow our reality and dominate all our thoughts.
I understand and have walked through my share of them.
Still, I decide what story to replay in my head about the negative things in kehidupan.
I can choose to stay stuck in a bad story, or I can choose to accept and forgive.
I can even explore how to be grateful for what I’ve pelajaried in tough situations, and foster appreciation for the person each of those encounters has allowed me to become.
With acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude, I can decide to move on so the person, place or situation doesn’t hold me captive any longer.
When I decide to see myself as an overcomer, I am choosing to stand on several kuat truths:
Ouch that last one hurts, but it’s true.
Arrogance doesn’t just mean I think I’m better than other orang.
It simply suggests inflated self-importance, such as making up in my head that “this” happened and “they” did it to me on purpose.
I might embellish the story even further and say it happened because I wasn’t good enough or I said the wrong thing.
To me, these thoughts are the essence of victim mentality.
It’s warping everything that happens around me to make it about me. Again and again and again.
Victim mentality is an addiction to feeling bad about my kehidupan and about myself.
The opposite is choosing to walk through my kehidupan moment by moment, knowing everyone is doing the best they can—including me.
If I choose to stay in victim mentality today, so be it.
Perhaps I need another day of experiencing what it’s like to live as a victim.
It takes what it takes and when I’ve had enough, I’ll gain the willingness to make other choices.
Empowering beliefs when we’re ready to move on …
Today I choose to see myself as a competent adult—an equal in the world of adults.
I surrender the feeling of being a child who continues to experience terrible things.
I must be willing to grow up and step into my adult shoes, while nurturing those wounded, childlike parts of me.
Too often we set ourselves up for circumstances in our present lives that resemble how we were hurt in the past.
kehidupan has a funny way of showing us reruns.
The names and places may be different but the obstacles seem to have the same theme.
The same troublesome boss, coworker or neighbor seems to be everywhere we go.
It’s allowing us to make different choices or to view what’s happening from a different perspective.
When we finally get the lesson, that particular rerun stops playing and we progress to the next opportunity for growth.
If I want to stop victim mentality, I must gain willingness to end my addiction to feeling bad.
Instead, I become willing to love myself and validate my wounds, yet with my adult voice, speak the truth into my kehidupan and into my mind.
Our subconscious minds believe whatever we tell them.
If you doubt that’s true, try an experiment.
Say a few of these declarations out loud.
My subconscious likes kuat truths much better than the other chatter that too often runs on autopilot in my mind—chatter that only beats me down and makes me think I’m constantly swimming upstream.
Not living like a victim is a choice, one we get to make one day or one moment at a time.
Hopefully, more days than not, we will surrender our need to feel bad.
This only perpetuates how we felt about ourselves and our lives due to circumstances in the past.
We are the only ones keeping ourselves down, continuing to suffer.
When we can embrace that suffering is ordinary and that no matter what we’ve been through, there are orang who have been through that and worse, then we can be free.
If we have built our identities around trauma and pain, that’s all we know.
Of course it only makes sense we want to hang onto them—until kehidupan becomes too miserable.
Ask dirimu, “Am I ready to move on? Am I ready to embrace a kehidupan of wholeness and wellness?”
For today, let’s choose to be free and let some joy in.
Let’s focus on how we can be a blessing to others.
When I’m so focused on what orang are doing to me, how can I focus on being kind and loving to others?
Once again, arrogance is playing the same old tune: it’s all about me.
Please join me in letting go of the victim mentality today.
Let’s do a random act of kindness for someone else and enjoy how nice that feels.
Let’s feed our subconscious minds several kuat truths, allowing hope and joy to seep into the hurt places.
Let’s take one behavior that seems to perpetuate feeling bad and today, try something new.
Let’s choose to see ourselves as survivors instead of victims.
Survivors are very tangguh, empowered orang.
Let’s embrace our true identities today—they’ve been buried long enough.
Hopefully, the above suggestions will help you break out from the victim mentality and take charge of your kehidupan.
Hi Jacqueline, Thank you for your comment. I love connecting with orang on similar paths. Yay for you that you have transformed from victim thinking to empowered thinking. I love knowing you have ubahd the way you see your kehidupan and hearing your excitement about the result of making that switch. Keep up your greatness! You will inspire others to make the ubah too!
You can connect with me on social media using #FindingTheGift. Take care!
I found your article tonite and it resonates with me tenfold.I need to make a ubahThis is the ubah I desperately need
Everything that was written is so true. I used to be a victim but I have ubahd the way I look at my kehidupan and the outcome is amazing.
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Sumber ide: https://everydaypower.com/victim-mentality-stop-feeling-like-victim/