Zapped by a mixture of chemicals and lunch while continuing his Father�s research on a cure for idiocy, Kaptain Kwik, on awakening from his comatose state, realised he had come into possession of unique powers. A small miscalculation in his formulas for the Quadratic Stupidic Tangent, combined with the unfinished yoghurt in his lunch box, had led to him accidentally discovering the Speed Force - a power once thought to have been lost to the ages when it was accidentally put out with the recycling on Tuesday night.
It was around this time that Lumens Luke was training for the 100m Gargle at the 1939 Munich Olympic Games. Lumens, having heard rumours of the Speed Force, employed a crack team of German scientists to start deciphering ancient speed related texts, hoping to use the Speed Force to propel him to fame, fortune and Olympic gold. The scientists, however, turned out to be idiots so Lumens sought out Kwik, whom he�d briefly met on the college gargling circuit, hoping to find a cure. It turned out that there was no cure for being an idiot, but Kwik had something else Lumens was after - the formula for the Speed Force!
Lumens went on to win the gold in the 100m Gargle and accidentally won Silver in two unrelated events once he�d harnessed the primal power of the Speed Force � and he owed it all to Kwik. Kwik and Lumens became fast friends, literally, successfully putting an end to World War II, accidentally starting World War III and putting end to that before anybody noticed. It was here that the Golden Age of the Q.R.T.! began, but it would be some time before the Q.R.T.! as we know it would be known as it� the Q.R.T!, that is.
Under the guise of The Response Crew, Lumens and Kwik traveled the world, responding to all sorts of trouble and strife. A year or two later they found Commander C hiding in the back of the van. Realising he'd been listening the whole time they had no choice but to invite him to join the team � he�d heard everything and they didn�t have a shovel. It was with the addition of Commander C that they changed their name to The Quickness Gang, then The Fast Boys, then The Beach Boys. After a particularly nasty lawsuit they changed their name to the Quick Response Team! The name seemed to work and it was here that the Silver Age of the Q.R.T.! began.
A few more ages followed � Gravel, Soup, and Vinyl � and it was during the best forgotten Paper Age that Breaky-Fixy and Silly Stevie joined the Q.R.T.! completely by accident after a laundromat mishap resulted in Silly Stevie wearing Kwik�s socks.
The Modern Age began when Matt the Wonder Twins came into being. Cloned from Commander C's duffle coat, Kaptain Kwik managed to infuse The Wonder Twin's D.N.A. with the pure essence of the Speed Force. This made them highly unstable and almost impossible to take out in public but it turned out to be a major step in Kwik's research to clone humans from unfashionable clothing. On an excursion to the 3rd Inaugural Tom Skerrit Film Festival for the Twin's birthday they met Dynamik Daryl. Impressed by his shoes, and the cut of his jib, Lumens asked him to join the Q.R.T.! They were indeed nice shoes and it was Daryl�s presence that took the Q.R.T. to the catwalks of Paris.
Their stay in Paris was brief but memorable. The cut of Daryl�s jib had also caught the eye of Professor Benson, a.k.a. Ben-o, a.k.a. The Professor, a.k.a. Princess, an amateur fashion designer and part time clock. The Professor was working on what he called the �Fast Look�, and working with him was the only person in France who could keep up with the lightning paced catwalk action - Spooky Luke. Daryl took to the stage in The Professors creations but the look was so fast that the highly anticipated trend was over before it began. Unable to keep Greenwich Mean Time, The Professor lost his part time job and Commander C, unhappy with the current uniform, asked The Professor and Spooky Luke to join the Q.R.T.! and provide them with designs for something a little more snug with a little more "wow". The Professor provided the "snug" and Spook provided the "wow". Whilst in France, Silly Stevie, heir to the Royal Throne of Guam, was invited to throw out the first spool at the Cannes Film Festival. Who knew that the spool would herald the arrival of Ms. Mercury, after it hit her on the head.
Ms. Mercury, an actress and amateur stuntwoman working under the stage name Snappy McGee, was in Cannes promoting her latest film �The Facts of Life Down Under in Uruguay�, which co-incidentally featured Spooky Luke in a cameo as "Young George Clooney". It was this chance meeting between her head and a large blunt object that lead to her joining the Q.R.T.! after accidentally filling out the Q.R.T.! application form, thinking that it was instead the paper work for a restraining order.
On their return home from Cannes the Q.R.T.! threw a party to herald their triumphant return. It was at this party that they met The Cannon through a friend of a friend. He crashed on the couch and was still there 2 months later.
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