Title: Rebellion

Author: quew

Archive: My site, anywhere else just ask so I know where it is.

Disclaimer: Buffy The Vampire Slayer and all associated characters and situations do not belong to me. They belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, WB, etc etc. I am just borrowing them for a little fun (The characters, not Joss Whedon and co.) And I’ll clean them up and wash out their mouths before I return them.

Subject: I’m bored, and these kinds of fics are really fun to write if you’re in the right mood. Um, basically the characters aren’t doing what I want them to do, and they start expressing it verbally. One in particular.

Spoilers: only if you nothing about Tara.

Authors Note: I usually do this sort of thing when I’m bored/angry/annoyed/exasperated because it’s good to just write whatever comes into my head so it’s not in there cluttering up the place. The idea came to me when I was re-reading ‘Oh My’, My little Sg1 fluff piece. I know it’s been done before, and if I were you I’d go and find all the versions you can because some of them are hysterical. I’ll try and find some soon and post a link from the site so you can see what I mean. Oh, and I just got a new keyboard, so the urge to play with it is overwhelming me. My old one was about four years old, and the b and j didn’t work much anymore. The k was starting to go too. And this one makes a cool thunk noise instead of the clack my old one did. And now I’m rambling.

~~~~~~~~~

The Scooby gang, Willow, Buffy, Tara, Xander, Giles and Anya, were all sitting round Gile’s table. A new danger had presented itself to the gang in the form of a new type of demon, and Giles was determined to find out what it was.

‘How long are we going to stay here and boff up on bad guys, Giles?’ Xander moaned, ‘My butts’ gone to sleep in this chair!’

‘I’ll wake it up for you,’ Anya grinned, but before she could slip a hand under the table, Buffy spoke.

‘Hey guys, what does this look like to you?’ She held up a picture of what looked to be a cross between a fish and a chicken trying to eat a tree.

‘Buffy would you pass me a jelly doughnut, please?’ Giles mumbled, his nose pressed firmly in a book.

\I don’t even want a damn jelly doughnut\

What? Of course you want one, you just asked for one!

‘Thanks,’ he said, a little distracted, as she handed one over.

Suddenly, Buffy looked up. ‘Hey, where’s Riley?’ She asked, a frown crossing her features. ‘Isn’t he sposed to be here?’

No. I don’t like him. Well, I do, but I didn’t want him here.

[You can’t just not have him in a crucial scene!]

What are you talking about? This isn’t a crucial scene! I could make you stand on your head and eat Rusks if I wanted too!

‘Oh…well….’ Buffy seemed to be having trouble talking. ‘I…guess I don’t…need him after all…’ A big crease worked it’s way into her smooth brow, letting the others know something was wrong.

‘What’s the matter Buff?’ Willow asked, looking up from her book, as did all the other apart from Giles, who was too engrossed.

\Too engrossed? Oh great, make me look like an uncaring emotional stone, why don’t you?! Honestly, just because I’m British-\

I’m British too, remember!

\That doesn’t mean you can’t be accused of using stereotypes, even if you do so unwittingly\

Shut UP!

‘You guys, aren’t you getting a little bored of this?’ Xander waved his book around, sighing. His hair swayed with the movement an-

{Oh, yeah, that’s right, pick on the boy with the hair handicap}

excuse me?

{I can’t help it if my hair is like this! It’s what I was born with, you can’t just change your hair you know!}

You didn’t let me FINISH. I was going to say ‘His hair swayed with the movement and Anya reached across to smooth it down in an affectionate gesture that caught him by surprise an-’

<What? Caught him by surprise? Like I’m not affectionate, so when I am it catches him by SURPRISE?! Listen, lady, I’ll have you know I am very affectionate, and anyone who says otherwise will be sorry!>

You what? Excuse me? Am I going crazy? Will you all please be quiet?…………Thank you.

-d smoothed down his hair in an affectionate gesture.

Willow noticed it and at the same time felt Tara’s hand run it’s course down her own head, lightly running over her auburn locks.

She turned and smiled at the other wicca, who smiled back, happy to be able to share a moment with her girlfriend.

:Hey, excuse me.:

What? What now?

:Oh…never mind.:

Ok, can I get back to the story?

:Yeah:

Ok, thank you.

Giles raised his eyes from his book, missing their moment but catching Willows’ eye-

:It’s just that-:

Whatever it is, don’t say it.

:But the thing is-:

Shush!

:You don’t think tha-:

Zip it.

:Maybe we should-:

Zip it.

:Perhaps it’d be cool if-:

Zip it.

:Could we maybe-:

Zip it.

:Hey! Now listen to me-:

Knock Knock.

:Who’s there?:

Zip.

:Zip who?:

Zip it.

:………I was thinking-:

You know, I was walking down the road one day, do you want to know who I met?

:Who?:

Mr Zip, from Zip road in Zip town and he told me to tell you to zip it.

:Ok, I’ll shut up, but I really think-:

Be quiet.

:….:

Thank you.

He spoke up. ‘Perhaps You and Tara should work on a magical means to destroy these beast, Willow.’

‘But won’t that be a bit hard if you don’t know what it looks like?’

‘I meant, just work on the general spells that work on most demons,’ Giles smiled, and Willow nodded.

(You know, this is getting kind of dull. Maybe you could spice it up a little. Give me some action or something, you know, cos all I do is sit there and look shy.)

I happen to think you’re an integral part of the team! I mean you do more than just sit! You do the spells and…and…Willow…Alright, alright, I see your point. But I don’t appreciate the interruption, ok?

(*giggle* ok. Thanks.)

Um, right.

‘I-I might know I spell that would work,’ Tara said. As all the eyes were on her now, she tried to keep her own up. ‘I have all the stuff In my bag right here, Willow and I could try it in the bathroom.’

‘Jolly good idea, Tara,’ Giles said, ‘Feel free to use it.’ He waved them away to the bathroom and the two wicca’s disappeared.

Once they were inside, Tara pushed Willow up against the wall and-

(I like where this is going, but make a bit more sensual, could you? I’m not really the pushing and ravishing type.)

Right, sorry.

(no problem.)

: Hey, how come you apologise to her but you tell me to-:

Zip it.

Once they were inside, Tara approached Willow, looking up at her through her lashes. ‘We’re all alone.’ She said softly, running a hand along the red-heads cheek.

Willow closed her eyes and enjoyed the sensation of skin on skin. She felt Tara’s breath on her lips as the blonde witch leaned in, and she shivered in delight as their tongues intertwined.

(Hey, that’s pretty good.)

Um, thanks. I don’t write much like it.

:You know what would be really cool? If we-:

Zip it.

:I am getting really annoyed with your tone!:

Oh will you please just zip it! Don’t push me, ok? I could get mad and do something I’ll regret.

:Oh, please, like what? You don’t have the guts.:

I don’t have the guts. I. Don’t. Have. The. Guts. I can’t believe you just said that.

Suddenly, a commotion broke out in the main room. Screams were heard, and Willow leapt forward, locking the door. It didn’t help, however, as the door burst open, leaving them choking on splinters and sawdust.

‘What did I tell you red?!’ A very familiar voice asked, and as the dust cleared they saw Spike leaning against the doorframe, his strong physique and leather jacket making him devastatingly good looking for a vampire.

^Thanks darlin’^

Not a problem, Spike. I always liked you from the start.

‘Did I or did I not say that I would come and finish what I started when the chip came out?’ Willow and Tara gasped as he grinned at them, his teeth matching his platinum blonde hair. ‘And guess what, my pretty little wicca? That’s right, I’m baaaaaaack!!’

He lunged forward, grabbing Willow by the arm and snatching her away from Tara, who looked on with fear widened eyes.

‘And,’ he continued, switching to his game face, ‘I think that considering you were the first person I couldn’t bite, I see it as only fitting that you are the first person I can bite!’ He tipped her head sharply to one side and, despite her constant struggling, bit deep into her neck.

‘Willow!’ Tara gasped, tears coursing down her face.

(You are going to bring her back right?)

Oh…yeah, sure. This is just cos she wouldn’t zip it.

^What? So I’m doing this for nothing?^

No, not nothing. You’re getting a free meal, aren’t you? And, if she comes back to life, you might be able to kill her again.

^Oh yeah, I didn’t think of that. Kinda like a two for one deal.^

Um, yes. Right. If you say so.

Spike dropped the lifeless husk of the witch and looked at Tara, a blood smeared grin on his face. ‘See you around toots.’ He said, bowing regally.

She stared at him with disbelief on her face, her breath coming in ragged gaps. She continued to stare blankly as he left, until something in the back of her mind galvanised her into action. Kneeling over Willow’s body, she pulled magical equipment from her bag. She knew the spell was difficult, but she was sure as hell going to try.

Reading from her spell book, she sat cross legged with Willow’s head facing upward in her lap. She spoke the incantation, drawing the blessed knife and cutting her palm so deep the blood flowed freely. She clamped the cut down over Willow’s mouth and let her life-force flow with the crimson liquid. She could feel the spiritual guides opposing her spell, and she fought with all her heart and soul to let the transference continue. Sweat broke out on her brow and she gasped as she became light headed. Vivid colours danced behind her screwed shut eyelids, wanting her to follow them, to be lost in a cornucopia of blues and pretty, joyful swirls of green and yellow. She resisted and held on to her will with all her strength, and even as she began to pass out, she fiercely willed the spell to work.

‘Uhhh oohhh.’ Her eyes snapped open, tears filling them quickly as her girlfriend’s eyelids fluttered and the syllables resonated against her wrist

‘Willow…’ She whispered, lifting it away.

At first, Willow pursed her lips and pouted like a baby whose bottle has been confiscated, but then she sat bolt upright, her eyes wide open and her teeth exposed in an enraged snarl.

:Right! You’re going to pay for that! And don’t you dare tell me too-:

Zip it. I was on a roll there!

:Oh, that’s just rich. You have gone way too far! You messed with the wrong wicca!:

Oh please, what are you going to do? No really, what are you going to do? Um, do you think that we should all calm down now? Woah, Willow, put down the spell-book! What are you reading? I didn’t say you could do that!

:Oh yeah?! Did you say I could do…this?’

OWWWW! What the…?

:Or this?:

Argh! My trousers are on fire! Getthemoff! Ohgodsomeonegetthemoffofme!

:Or…THIS?!:

ARG…Wait a minute…nothing happened! Hah, your spell backfired! Hehehe, looks like you’re not so…oh dear. I don’t feel so good…what’s happening to me? What have you – croak – done to – croak – me? Ribbit. Croak. Ribbit, Ribbit.

:Does someone want to translate?:

(Wipe that smirk off your face. That’s going too far, and this is me talking not her. She’s saying something about flies.)

:Too far? Too far?! She killed me!:

Ribbit! RIBBIT RIBBIT CROAK!

:What did she say?:

(Um, ‘only because you wouldn’t zip it.’)