Episode 1…THE DARK HAND- Jackie Chan the archaeologist begins his adventures searching for a legendary shield lying in the quarters of a Bavarian castle. Oops, a colleague makes a mistake and sets a booby trap. The Chan Man gets his friends out, but not himself.

Jackie Chan vs. Bavarian Arrows (***)- Oh please. If you want to make sure guys like Jackie never escape an old castle alive, would you a.) Let the walls shoot the arrows for you, or b.) Hire a descent of loyal guards to do the shooting? Choice a.) is much cheaper, but after this, I bet somewhere the old king is rolling in his grave….

Not long after fleeing back to San Francisco with the antique shield, Jackie’s destiny collides with those of many others. Jackie gives his Uncle the shield. Then, he finds himself the new guardian to Jade, his niece sent from Hong Kong. She’s said to be having trouble in school. Apparently unhappy of the long flight from home, Jade remains mum as Jackie tries to befriend her, and then a motley evil trio shows up demanding the shield or else the antiques get it, but of course, with Jackie around, the antiques don’t get it. The trio promises they’ll get the shield or Jade gets it. Jackie, not liking these men one bit, disappoints Uncle for refusing to communicate properly. ("You terrible salesman!") Then he chases after the trio, and outrages the baddies by making their minivan get it.

Jackie Chan [Handicap] vs. Chow, Ratso, and Finn (*****)- Now THAT’S what we’re talking about! Ever seen Jackie whack his opponents with benches, chairs, or steel barrels, even though his foes have guns and batons? Well, here, you get Jackie whipping mean windshield wipers against the Enforcers’ electric swords. The fight ultimately spills to a kids’ park, where Jackie teaches every one of them that even though the setting is childish, there’s still no child’s play going on. This is the first classic bout in the series.

Jackie is still standing when his friend Angus Black knocks him out. After a slight misunderstanding amongst the two, Jackie learns that Black lives in a base where the scariest thing is the elevator leading to it. Okay, there is one thing worse; Jackie learns the cronies fighting him are under the employ of Valmont.

Due to the failure of the cronies, Valmont is unhappy, as is his giant wall ornament, apparently…He then gets the big man Tohru to get the shield, while the wall ornament calls for ninjas to come out of nowhere and attack Jackie.

Another battle seems to erupt in Black’s base, but it’s just Jade learning to- Jade?! Jackie stops her before she gets pulled over for illegal driving. Jade finds America cool when she learns Black is allowed to knock out his friend Jackie…Guess this means it’s illegal in Hong Kong, right?

Uncle phones Jackie, and tries to tell him secrets of the shield when Tohru captures him and warns Jackie to get the shield or Uncle gets it. Jade manages to find the shield and joins Jackie to retrieve Uncle, who is her uncle’s uncle. Jackie tricks Tohru, and Jade and Uncle run off while Jackie goes another way with the shield. But then, the whooshes roar in the soundtrack, and fast shadows appear. You know what that means. No. No. NO! For crying out loud, it’s not Sonic the Hedgehog…

Jackie Chan [Handicap] vs. Shadowkhan (***)- TOO QUICK! In less than 2 minutes, Jackie spends the majority of this battle running away and landing a few nice socks to the Shadowkhan, and running away some more. Good question by fight’s end, though: if the Shadowkhan are so speedy, why must they throw smoke balls to make their disappearance?

Jackie loses the shield, but Uncle explains that the magical talisman inside it is what matters most. Fortunately, Jade turns out to have attained the talisman somewhere along the way ("Face it. I’m getting wise"). The slap-happy intellect that he is, Uncle surmises that the talisman, bearing a rooster image, must be one of 12 talismans bearing animals of the Chinese Zodiac. It’s not long before Jackie decides to accept Captain Black’s services to find the talismans before the Dark Hand gets all of them. So far, Jade seems to really like America. Bet she can’t wait to get knocked out by a friend, eh?

A

"Jackie Chan Adventures" gets off to a big, roaring start with this pilot. Noticeably, the backgrounds for the series is incredibly simplistic and mostly likely could’ve been drawn by an elementary student. Of course, that’s not what the creators have in mind. What matters most is the beautifully lithe and charismatic motion of the characters, whose drawings have been specially selected by the real Jackie Chan, admitting he’s a huge fan of cartoons. It’s no surprise his fandom is proof of the entertainment beheld in this one. This is Animerican animation at its best!

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Episode 2…THE POWER WITHIN- The Chans are in a nice little Chinese bistro where Uncle teaches Jackie about how special the talismans are, not to mention how trustful fortune cookies can be. Meanwhile, Jackie teaches Jade not to try any of his martial arts, but Jade doesn’t quite obey and causes a havoc all over the bistro. Once Jackie calms down his niece, he tells her one must control the power within before unleashing the power to the outside, and the first thing Jade could do to have that control is to eat her bowl of noodles, so she does. Soon after, though, guess who shows up for a rematch.

Jackie w/ Uncle & Jade vs. Chow, Ratso, and Finn [No Weapons Barred, No Waiters Hurt] (****1/2)- Again Jackie and the Enforcers score another bulls-eye in a restaurant battle with brooms, soup bowls, and canes. Here we also see Uncle’s not really past his fighting prime. Oh, yeah, the battle loses points cause ole Finn tries to smoke Chan. What a cheat…

The Enforcers run away with tails between their legs, if they ever have tails to begin with…But Jackie realizes the Rooster Talisman is no longer at the dinner table, and chases after the Enforcers, thinking they must have it. Jade follows, not noticing Shadowkhan are pursuing her at the moment as well. When the Shadowkhan are noticed, Jackie has Jade to flee to another direction, only to discover that the ninjas DON’T want him…

Jackie and Jade [Handicap] vs. Shadowkhan w/ Tohru (***1/2)- This is one of those crazy chase scenes that goes to show you that Jackie doesn’t need a car to cross miles and miles of road. (Though maybe he should get a license really really soon.) Some furious brawling combined with lots of over-the-top stunts makes this really neat entertainment. However, Tohru sneaks out of nowhere and defeats the exhausted Chan with a single blow (shades of Shane Douglas, if you ask the fellow Luchadore)

Locked up in a fish cannery, Jackie and Jade learn that the little girl has been keeping the Rooster Talisman in her stomach all along, a result of the chaos back at the restaurant. Under the advisement of Valmont and Shendu, Tohru considers gutting Jade to get to the talisman. But now aware of this special power within, Jade sends a batch of crates to level the sumo. Jackie and Jade are about to make and break when guess who joins Tohru for another unwilling encounter.

Jackie and Jade [Handicap] vs. Chow, Ratso, Finn, and Tohru (****1/2)- If they’re a worldwide syndicate, why must the Dark Hand always situate themselves in fish canneries? (Maybe they should eat more fish; Valmont isn’t providing them enough brain food.) Anyways, Jackie shows off more of his old resourcefulness by whipping the Enforcers down with fish. Tohru hates fish, though, so he begins brutalizing Jackie left and right. But Jade uses the talisman to send Tohru up in the air. Next thing we know, the requisite "Holy S." spot occurs as Tohru is sent crashing nonstop through several floors down to the waters below. What a great finale to a great episode.

Jackie tells Black that he’s convinced that the talismans must possess very potent magical powers, but Black thinks Jackie’s over his head. Black tells Jackie that the archaeologist and Jade ought to be safeguarded in Section 13 until the Dark Hand is beaten. Having the talisman removed off of her (trust me, you don’t really want to know how), Jade eagerly asks Jackie if this means she’s now a secret agent. Of course, Jackie and Black both say "no".

A

Two great episodes in a row so far. I just love "Jackie Chan Adventures".

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Episode 3…THE MASK OF EL TORO FUERTE- Jackie Chan realizes what it means when the talismans are scattered to the four corners of the earth, as he walks over to an ancient Mexican pyramid, the location of the next talisman. Not far off, The Enforcers and some cowardly newbies are plotting to get the Ox Talisman off of Jackie. One newbie is reluctant because he fears mummies, but Finn says mummies are only in Egypt. (Not quite, senor Finn. Mummies have been found in Peru too, as well as many others across the globe. And many mummies are not what we call the religiously deliberate versions of them, but they are mummies nonetheless. This is sad proof that Finn hasn’t aced his history classes.)

Jackie finds where the talisman must be stored, which is in the mouth of an ox head statue. He actually has to insert his hands into its nostrils to open the mouth (luckily for Chan, there are no thousand-year old boogers). Much to his dismay, the talisman is nowhere at all. The Enforcers quickly approach Jackie for a shot at getting Shendu’s booty (old language for treasure, okay?), only to notice too that neither the statue nor Jackie seems to have the talisman. Suddenly, a creaky, skeletal figure appears before the Enforcers and Jackie. Could it be a walking mummy?

Jackie [Handicap] w/ Jade vs. The Enforcers (***)- Okay, so it’s just little Jade scaring the heck out of all the adults. (I presume all have seen Arnold Vosloo/Boris Karloff in "The Mummy", no?) Jackie grabs Jade and they make a wild run out of the forests. The Enforcers chase the Chan duo on mean, lean wheels that send them in reels. None of them have apparently used motorcycles in landscapes where branches creep up from the ground. That’s a dang shame. Jackie and Jade quickly escape by nabbing some tourists’ glider and flying off to safety (which goes to show that the only unethical dilemma Jackie ever has is stealing people’s stuff and never giving them back.) The Enforcers blow the chase by driving their motorcycles unwillingly into the nearby drink. That’s it, Valmont. Make "Geography" a pre-requisite before hiring more goons.

Jackie and Jade are safe and sound at a small Mexican villa. Jackie is off to buy sombreros for him and his niece. While Jackie is picking the best hat sizes, a local boy walks over to Jade, encouraging her to attend an event featuring the boy’s favorite hero, El Toro Fuerte (I think the name’s Mexican for "The Ferocious Bull"). The boy, named Paco, is proudly confident of the strength of the wrestler El Toro, but Jade thinks her Uncle Jackie can beat El Toro. Jade adds, after all, that wrestling is fake, and what Jackie does is real (I.e., he puts the "Real" in "Really hurts"). Thus begins Jade and Paco’s many classic arguments against one another, which always goes, "Jackie", "El Toro", "Jackie", "El Toro", that kind of stuff. Paco finally replies that perhaps "mouse man" Jackie should muscle up against El Toro to see who truly is the greatest. Jade agrees.

As soon as Paco leaves and Jackie offers Jade a sombrero, the younger Chan pleads Jackie to fight El Toro. Jackie explains he only fights when there’s no choice, and therefore, he needn’t have to meet El Toro Fuerte. But when Jackie looks at an advertising poster of the undefeated luchadore, he notices the Ox Talisman right atop of El Toro’s mask! Maybe there won’t be much of a choice!

Jade goes over to the wrestling ring with Paco, while Jackie strides over to backstage in hopes of retrieving the talisman from the wrestler. What Jackie fails to understand, though, is that El Toro would do anything to preserve the mask’s integrity like a badge of honor. Unable to convince El Toro, Jackie is suddenly grabbed by Tohru, who has clearly not listened to any of Jackie’s conversation with the wrestler. The Chan Man luckily pulls down Tohru’s pants (revealing the typical funky-hued skivvies) and evades the remaining Enforcers by disguising as a luchadore himself. Unfortunately, the ring announcer sees Jackie’s guise and sends the hero into the ring against…El Toro Fuerte?! (Funny thing; Jackie’s luchadore name, I don’t remember the exact name, probably means "Cowardly Chicken").

Jackie Chan vs. El Toro Fuerte [Undefeated Champion] (***)- OUCH is the least we can say over what El Toro does to Jackie, in particular a couple of slams that could’ve sent Jackie permanently out of body and out of mind. Mercifully, Jackie is blacked out before anything worse can happen. Paco may call him "mouse man", but here, I’d rather call him "roach man"! As it is for many a character, the first battle El Toro appears in is a victory. (Cue in the infamously bad "Pro Wrestling" video game tag line; "A Winner Is You…")

Jade is sorely disappointed at Jackie’s loss as an unconscious Jackie is unmasked before the crowd, a symbol of a luchadore’s disgrace. The Enforcers almost jump on Jackie until Tohru notices why Jackie’s been in the event all this time; the talisman on El Toro’s head.

Jackie’s soul lies in Dream Street when the face of Uncle arrives before him with an array of questions and complaints, none of which is useful. (Perhaps Uncle has cast some kind of special spell to his nephew? We’ll never know..) Okay, so the conversation DOES turn a little helpful, because this ghost Uncle explains to Jackie that perhaps El Toro’s super-strength must be attributed to the Ox Talisman, nothing less. The ghost Uncle then waves his fingers and knocks Jackie back to consciousness. Jade is sad over her uncle’s loss, until Jackie explains to her that El Toro must’ve used the talisman to win his fights. She then perks up in self-satisfaction, probably hoping that Paco would see the errors of his judgment. Jackie has no time to agree with that, for he must find El Toro.

El Toro’s thankfully not so far; he is signing an autograph for Paco, one for every victory the wrestler can score. As one can see, the wrestler keeps on the mask even though he now dons a dignified tuxedo. (So…how does this hombre clean up his face? Surely, he’s got to be collecting perspiration within that mask. And what about the sweat on his hair? Makes you want to go EWW!)

Suddenly, Finn arrives to introduce El Toro to Tohru, and Tohru to El Toro. (Now we know…That 60s dude Finn loves that 90s dude David Letterman). After the warm-as-ice intros, Tohru tries to outbrawn El Toro, but even the sumo is no match, as he is thrown and totals a nearby car in the brief test of strength. Their courage taking a dive, the shocked Enforcers scatter and flee on their feet. (Moments from this point on, Valmont will have found the local Dark Hand employment office in near vacancy. He might see it that way till the doomed end of the syndicate.)

Jackie meets a departing El Toro to warn him that there will be many more bad men after the luchadore until he concedes the talisman on the mask. El Toro stubbornly doesn’t want to give up his mask, much less let anyone touch it. Jade and Paco follow, aware that it wouldn’t be long before more fighting can occur. (Paco’s not afraid one bit; this means more victories for his hero!) Indeed, the soundtrack roars with swooshes and swishes as near invincible beings arrive. No, it’s not Sonic OR Tails….

Jackie Chan & El Toro Fuerte [Handicap] w/Jade & Paco vs. The Shadowkhan (****1/2)- This here’s match of the episode. The Shadowkhan, realizing that Jackie’s twice as tough with El Toro around, arrive with an assortment of weapons at hand. They’ve forgotten a key rule in Lucha Libre; if you bring a weapon against a foe, you’re asking the foe to use it against you. And that’s what Jackie does, as he actually uses one of their battle poles to knock them off their feet! (You can tell the weapon’s not magical; if it is, the Shadowkhan should’ve willed it to vanish off of Jackie’s hands). Meanwhile, El Toro has a blast throwing the Shadowkhan like paper dolls, but he messes up the game big time by taking his own tag partner onto Dream Street! (This raises an important question; has the mighty El Toro ever been a tag-team champ?) Paco and Jade provide color commentary across the fight, though you’ve got to admit they’re the first announcing duo I’ve known to be arguing over the better hero; in a tag match, most announcers would side with the good side or the bad. Hey, Paco and Jade are kids…Can you blame them?

Unfortunately, with El Toro unwittingly outnumbered all the more, the Shadowkhan nab his mask and render him helpless. A simple bola stops El Toro in his tracks, and a shocked Paco discovers that his hero has indeed been leading a lie. Tohru grabs the talisman AND Jackie Chan and quickly departs via a jeep ridden by the remaining Enforcers (i.e., the ones we see every time). A tearful Paco runs away from the scene, and Jade and El Toro are left alone on the quiet street.

Jade goes over to the maskless El Toro to convince him that there lies in him a power within. Jackie would say that it doesn’t matter if the luchadore’s been using the talisman to aid him with the victories; as long as he has some kind of will, he’d be okay. El Toro doesn’t quite compute the philosophy (that goes double for you, Jackie…), so Jade convinces him that she’s going to follow Jackie, and may need a little muscle to help her on the way.

Not too far off, the Enforcers are readying a plane. Jackie’s inside and being tied up with crude rope usually used to haul up major cargo. The talisman is secured in the cockpit, and the enemies are good to go. (Or is that bad to go? I don’t know…) Suddenly, Jade shows up by the window, and the Enforcers are out to get her. Too bad the window doesn’t show a raging ox of a man along with her…

Jackie Chan, El Toro Fuerte & Jade w/Paco vs. The Enforcers (****)- Yup, it’s everyone’s favorite action scene; you know, the one where the contenders are on a moving transport that crash lands somewhere towards the end. Jackie Chan actually doesn’t fight in this battle, though; Jade and El Toro accidentally leave him outside of the plane, suspended only by the crude rope. Once the plane flies, poor Jackie is hanging for dear life in a stunt that would give the real Chan a heart attack. Plus, El Toro knuckles up against Tohru and Jade manages to retrieve the talisman, albeit eliminating the pilot and having the plane crash back down to the villa.

Back on solid ground, Jackie and El Toro face Tohru in what becomes a Handicap match. El Toro wishes not to use the talisman, ever more determined to be all natural, in his fighting style anyway. The double-team antics don’t work, so Jade puts on the Ox Talisman and turns Tohru into a building’s free-of-charge wrecking ball. Talk about a REAL handicap for the Sumo Enforcer.

Paco witnesses the fight on the ground, and while El Toro doesn’t actually win the battle, he has won the boy’s respect for him once again, so much, in fact, that Paco wants to be El Toro’s student. Paco is now sure that El Toro is the greatest. Suddenly, the tender moment screeches to a halt, as Jade argues Jackie is better, thus reviving the argument. Jackie and El Toro, for once, scratch their necks in confusion. Indeed, if Jackie and El Toro can’t beat Tohru two on one, and if Jade beats him with a talisman, who IS the better one here?!

One more thing; now that El Toro doesn’t have the mask, can he wash his face just this once?!

A

Maybe it’s not as pitch perfect as the first two episodes, but there are plenty of moments to sustain the life of this story. One of my favorite parts of "Jackie Chan Adventures" is its multicultural diversity; almost all the heroes are minorities, though the villains (human) tend to be Caucasians. (Reverse discrimination, you say? DON’T even go there…) El Toro Fuerte and Paco are quite enjoyable characters, and Paco and Jade almost look so cute here. Of course, they’re not really the cutest duo. (Check Episode 32 to see why.) The first three episodes in JCA have been compiled on DVD, but I think this version has the full episodes. No one’s complained of any cuts, so you can buy this one, but don’t buy the DVDs following this one, unless Tajeri Lynn says so. Then again, with the DVD having only 3 episodes, you might as well record episodes on video and just wait for a DVD transfer…