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Part 15: Shit, it's hot by Strawberry Paul, Tim and Rich sat in the back of their History class trying so very hard to concentrate on what the teacher was blabbing on about, something about America growing rice of something. Paul and Tim were writing pictures to each other and Richard was concentrating on the work. "My arse is stuck to the chair." Paul whispers to Tim as he lifts himself off to un-stick himself. Tim just sat back and opened his legs as wide as he could. Paul looked along the row and everyone else was doing it too, even the girls. Well that�s only one good thing about a hot day. "I�m so hot!" Tim whispers. "No your not." Rich says back to him. "I don�t mean that although I am quite sexy, I mean I am sweating like a pig." Paul takes his bottle of water that is sitting o the desk and shakes it around a bit to crush up the ice then he takes off the lid and pours it down Tim�s back. Tim lets out a high pitched squeal and jumps out of his seat. The water ran down his back. "Mr. Ferguson is everything okay?" the teacher asks, but Tim couldn�t find his voice to answer so Paul took the liberty. "Yes his fine, it�s just the heat, it does weird things to him. I should also advise you that he tends to srip off his clothes without even realizing what he is doing. We have taken him to a psychologist and he says that he should grow out of it in a couple of years. Tim slaps Paul upside the head and sits back down in his chair. "Stupid prick." Tim snarls back at him. They sit there for a little while in silence until Paul passes a piece of paper to Rich but it was intercepted by Tim, which was easily foreseen considering Tim was sitting in between them. It was a sketch of the teacher being burnt at the stack with the words "burn, bitch, burn" scrawled across the top. They all had a bit of a snigger when Tim added in the devil, who was tall and thin and wearing a g-string. "f--- it�s hooooooot!" Paul whined. "Why can�t we go home on days like this. I have to water, it�s all down your back and I am soooo hooooooooot!" "Hey, we�re hot to but do you hear us complaining?" Rich said. "Just shut up and do your work so we can get it off you when it�s cooler." Rich did as he was told. "Tim?" "Yeah Paul? "Is the teacher writing what I think she�s writing?" "Um. . . what do you think she�s writing?" "She�s writing : I am hot and I don�t want to teach these stupid kids. . ." "No I don�t think so." "But can�t you see it?" "Put yer glasses on!" "No it�s too hot to wear them. Hang on there�s more : I wish I could just rip this dress off. This g-string is doing nothing but riding up my arse, why did I put it on today. I want to go and lay on a beach somewhere with Nicole." Paul finished. "Who is Nicole?" Tim asks with interest. "How the hell should I know. So you can see it?" "Yeah I think so." Tim rubs his eyes and looks again. "Yeah I can see it. Why isn�t anyone else reacting to this? Who is Nicole?" "Maybe she�s a lesbian." Rich puts in after listening to what they are saying. "No way. She wouldn�t be, not Miss. James. She�s so . . . girly." Paul says. "You guys are completely whacked. Where are you getting all this from anyway?" Rich asks. "She�s writing it on the board. I swear!" Tim says. "She is not. Why would she be writing that?" The bell rings. "I gotta get you guys outta here and cool you down." They pack up their books and Rich grabs them both buy the shirt and drags them to the lockers. They get their stuff and start to head home, stopping off at each sprinkler along the way to cool off. They come across one of the big tall council sprinklers. (you know the ones that go sh sh sh sh) "Aw! Wouldn�t this be great if it was turned on! Rich go and follow the hose and turn it on." Rich does what he is told. They put their bags down out of reach of the sprinkler. Paul walked up to it and started hitting it. "Come on Rich turn it on!" He yells and then he waits and waits and waits while Tim stands back knowing what�s going to happen. At the moment the water comes rushing out of the sprinkler at full pelt straight into Paul�s groin. He falls back out of reach of the water. "Why? Why? Why?" he yells as he holds himself and rolls on the ground. "Why is it always me who gets hurt like this? My poor dick, my poor little dick." Paul starts to sook. "Well, mate, I think it�s because we don�t tell you what we see coming." Tim says. Paul gets up and is so mad at Tim. "You could see what was going to happen? You could see that the water, hot water, was going to come crashing into my dick?" He runs up to Tim and punches him fair in the groin. Rich returns to see both Tim and Paul standing waiting for him both holding themselves. Rich gave them a funny look but didn�t dare to ask. They walked home in silence. |
