Nodwick: Party Search

By Quamp

 

Nodwick came into Henchman's local #246 with 4 reams of paperwork. He made it a habit to visit the local with all this paperwork at exactly 4:30 p.m. Heathwick was there, and received the paperwork. "Time for my daily paperwork here." Nodwick said. "Hmm... only four reams today?" Heathwick asked. "It's been a slow day." Nodwick said. The paperwork, of course, was all the death and rebirth forms for that day. Heathwick gave all the forms to Kurtzwick. "File this in the Nodwick tower." He ordered Kurtzwick. Kurtzwick went back to a 300-foot tower and placed the contents inside. He returned to Heathwick and gestured to the tower. "We're running out of room again." Kurtzwick said. Heathwick sighed. "Well, I guess we'll have to build another tower." Heathwick said. After all, they already had about 14 of them, but only two were dedicated to Nodwick. "So what's new around here?" Nodwick asked. "Kebwick's 3 resurrections shy of his 500^th." Heathwick said. "It's kinda strange, though. His party went into a dungeon a few weeks ago and haven't been heard from since." Nodwick thought for a moment. "You mean all of his party was wiped out there?" Nodwick asked. "Could be. The dungeon's known as the Cavern of Exceptional Torture."

Sister Piffany was helping out in the gardens of her local cleric's guild. She was helping pull weeds out of the garden when the high matron approached her. "Sister Piffany, we have a problem here." The high matron started. "You can say that again. What happened to the sister that was taking care of the garden? I've never seen so many icky-poo weeds here in my life." The high matron took a solemn tone. "Sister Josanah was recruited as a last-minute replacement when Sister Saiah fell ill. Their party entered a dungeon called the Cavern of Exceptional Torture two weeks ago and haven't been heard from since." Piffany feared the worst for her sister. "Oh dear. Sister Josanah wasn't that experienced. I feel sorry for her." The high matron stared Piffany in the eyes. "Take your adventurer's team and go find her. Resurrect her if you have to. I want Sister Josanah back here as soon as possible." Piffany saluted the high matron. "Will do, high matron. I'll bring her back as soon as I can." Piffany replied.

Back at their home, Artax and Yager were selling phony life insurance to help replenish the coffers in their dungeon, the Hazardous Hall. They had just sold a phony policy for 15,000 gold when Piffany walked in. "What's going on here?" She asked. "Erm... this gentleman just paid us to eradicate some giant rats that were in his home." Yager equivocated. "Well, we've got an assignment. Sister Josanah is missing in action, and we've got to find her. She went to a cavern known as the Cavern of Exceptional Torture. I haven't heard much about that place, but I'm sure it's very not-nice." Yager and Artax were horrified. They knew that adventurers twice their level went into that place and came out dead. They heard about the enclave of the rainbow cabal of dragons there. "Please tell me you didn't tell the high matron we'd rescue them." Artax pleaded in vain. "Of course I did. Let's grab Nodwick and go." Piffany responded. "Aw man, Piffany. This is not good." Yager said. "That's where the rainbow cabal of dragons live. They're a group of high-level dragons that have torn even the most experienced, well armed and armored adventurers to pieces." Artax added. "Well, that kind of attitude won't get us far. We can do it, I know we can!" Both Artax and Yager stared nervously at each other. "So where's Nodwick?" Piffany asked. "Well... erm... we don't quite know right now. He said something about going to his guild and running a few errands..." Artax started. "He said he'd be gone a long time." Yager added. As fate would have it, Nodwick walked in shortly thereafter. "Hi, I'm back." He said. "Nodwick! We're going to the Cavern of Exceptional Torture to rescue Sister Josanah." Piffany said. Nodwick merely covered his face and sighed. "Looks like it'll be a 10 ream day tomorrow." He said. He wasn't that far off….

Well, they set out for the cavern of exquisite torture and made their way there. Along the way, they stopped at an inn and rested the night. Well, the next day, they arrived at the cavern of exquisite torture. They saw the sign outside the entrance; it read "Cavern of exquisite torture, hazard rating 5 stars." Piffany noted this. "A five-star hazard rating? Looks like we may go up a few levels here…." Nodwick was more pragmatic about things. "Or get killed several times over…" Nodwick said. Sadly, there was no deterring Piffany's optimism. She boldly strove into the cavern with the rest of the team following behind. "Artax, would you please check the place for icky-poo traps." She asked politely. Artax did as he was told, and found out the whole vestibule was booby-trapped. In fact, the safe place to stand was where they were standing right now. "This could be a problem." Artax noted. Then, as luck would have it, Yager sneezed and set off one of the traps. A large altar appeared in the middle of the room. On it there were three objects carved of ivory: A branch, a bowl, and a flame. A voice intoned: "Choose one of them now. Choose wisely, for choosing the wrong one means instant death!" Everyone stared at each other briefly. "You choose." Yager said. "No way. You choose." Artax replied. They argued for a little, and then pushed Nodwick at the altar. Nervously, Nodwick picked the water. "So you choose water, do you? Fine. Here you go!" Suddenly the vestibule filled with water. Hundreds of gallons of water rushed at them at once, knocking everyone down and sweeping them out of the cavern. It was tough for the party not to drown or get sucked under. Nodwick, sadly, was impaled upon a tree, and died. After the water subsided, our heroes found themselves outside the cavern. Yager was hanging upside-down from a tree by his feet. Artax was flat against a boulder; and Piffany was on the ground about a mile away from the place. "Duct tape…" Artax groaned. It took Piffany about 15 minutes to make it back to Artax and Yager. At that time, she duct taped Artax's arm, which was broken. "Well, look at the bright side. Imagine what would have happened if Nodwick chose fire." Piffany said.

It took them another 20 minutes to find Nodwick, who was impaled upon the tree. Some duct tape later, and Nodwick was back to his usual henching self. "That was so not-nice." Piffany said. "We'd best be careful here." So they went back inside the place and journeyed on. At another point, they entered a large cavern, and in the center of the cavern was a large, angry white dragon. It spotted the party immediately, and confronted them. "GRARGAH!! I am the white dragon of the rainbow dragon cabal!" It roared. "Death comes to all who enter this cavern!" This terrified everyone in the party, except for Piffany. "Wait a minute. White isn't a color in the rainbow. You can't be in the cabal of Rainbow dragons!" She said. "Dang. I was hoping nobody would point that out." The white dragon replied. He then stretched his mighty wings, and flew off. "I'll be the laughing stock of all dragons everywhere! I've been defeated by the facts!" He said. The others stared at Piffany. "That was amazing." Artax said. "Come on, we're not going to find our friends here." Piffany replied.

Well, moving right along, they entered the next room in which there was a large, vicious, mean blue dragon. "I am the blue dragon of the cabal of rainbow dragons!" The blue dragon said. "Death will come to all who see me!" He said. "Mr. Blue dragon, we're looking for some friends of ours." Piffany said. "They were a warrior, a cleric, a magic user, and a henchman like us." She added. "What!?" The blue dragon roared. "Someone else dared to bring a henchman in here!? I'll tear all their heads off!" He roared. "As for you bunch, you should die!" He then took a swipe at everyone with his mighty claws. Everyone dived out of the way to avoid being hit. "Someone come up with something fast!" Yager shouted. "I have an idea…" Artax reached into his magic pocket and recited an incantation. "Give is something that will defeat this dragon!" He half begged, half shouted. Artax then pulled out a very cute looking stuffed teddy bear. "A teddy bear? How in the world is that going to help us!?" Yager asked. Then another blue dragon entered, but this one was female. "Honey, what's going – oh, you remembered!" The female blue dragon said. "Well dear, I wanted to surprise you with that…" The male blue dragon said, not quite understanding what was going on here. (He, of course, forgot that it was her birthday.) The female blue dragon took the teddy bear from Artax. "I love it! It's so cute! Well, I know a certain dragon who remembered my birthday and is going to get very lucky tonight…" She cooed into his ear. The male blue dragon blushed. "Aw, isn't that sweet…." Piffany said. "Let's use this distraction to move on." Yager said. The others were eager to follow his lead in this case.

Our heroes walked down the corridor some more and occasionally checked for traps. They found a few and of course, Nodwick had to disarm them by springing them each time. Piffany was suspicious after the fifth time she had to resurrect Nodwick in four hours. When they came to the next cavern. The dragon there immediately breathed upon them, and all of them fell asleep immediately. When our heroes woke up, they were all strapped to a single bench. Nearby was the dragon, busy putting a tape into a VCR. "Ah, you're awake, you pathetic mortal worms. Now you will see why this place is called the cavern of exquisite torture!" He started up the tape and had them facing a television. "Welcome to the world of Backyard Dogs." The dragon said. "According to the Internet Movie Database, this film is in the bottom 10 in the bottom 100*. It has nobody important, nothing going for it, and lots of things to make you see why it's one of the worst movie ever made." The dragon said as he turned the VCR on.  Our heroes couldn't help but wince at watching this movie. "Egad. This is worse than any Sly Stallone movie!" Artax said. The blue dragon sneered at our heroes. "Maybe I should turn up the volume. Would you like that?" It asked. "NO!" All of them responded. They were forced to watch the whole movie. After it ended, Artax, Nodwick and Piffany had their minds snap. Yager, however, was completely normal. (Well, using that term in its loosest possible sense.) The film had always worked on anyone with a high amount of intelligence. Thinking that everyone's mind was a vegetable now, the blue dragon freed all of the party. "Heh heh heh… I'll put you four to work in the slave pits…" Yager sprang up and grabbed his sword. "Hah! Prepare to die!" Yager thrusted his sword deep into the blue dragon's chest. "AGH! Foolish mortal!" The dragon said. "Your sword would need to be a reaper of evil +4 to hurt me!" Yager smiled at him. "That is a reaper of evil +4." He said. "Aw Krutz." The dragon said. The blue dragon then proceeded to keel over.

Well, a bit of duct tape later, our heroes were back to normal. They proceeded down a pathway and discovered a secret door after Artax cast a spell. Upon opening it, they found something very disturbing indeed: the weaponry of the other party. "Oh dear. This is not a good sign." Piffany said. "We should take it so that when we find them, we can have them help us get out of here." Artax said. They gathered up the weaponry and went down another corridor. They occasionally stopped to cast a detect traps spell. Then they ran into two very angry, smelly, and nasty orcs. "Who dares try to free our captives!?" One of them said. "Uh-oh." Yager said. One of the orcs advanced on them, brandishing a sword of darkness +2 at them. Everyone went wide-eyed at this. "I think you four need to be killed." The orc said. He raised his sword to strike; Yager instinctively picked up Nodwick to shield himself from the blow. This made the orc stop. "What's this?" He said. "Bah! Rank amateurs! They're still using their henchman as a shield!" The orc lowered his sword, and pushed Nodwick aside. "You are far out of your league here, human. Only the most amateurish of humans use a henchman as a shield!" The orc said. "He's probably too cheap to buy a quality shield." The other orc said. "Oh, a cheapie, hmm? They're even worse than rank amateurs!" The first orc said. The orc then slugged Yager, knocking him to the ground. "You're not even worth soiling my sword over." He said. Piffany then smacked him with her staff. "Naughty! We are a force to be reckoned with!" She shouted. The orc took a swing at her, but she dodged that blow. Piffany then struck the orc again in the face with her staff. The orc was starting to get mad now. "What's going on here? How dare you try to beat me up!" Piffany hit the orc's sword with an H₂O_ly vial. Since the sword was evil by nature, this caused the sword to weaken and burst into flames. "AGH! That sword was my best sword! You've really earned yourself a slow, painful death, human!" Well, Yager used this distraction Piffany provided to sneak up to the orc and slice his head off. It took about three whacks from the reaper of evil that Yager wielded, but the orc fell. "Whew. Thank goodness that's over." He said. "You forgot one thing. There were two of us." The other orc said. The second orc then thrusted his sword into Yager. "This ends now." Artax intervened at this point. He had been preparing a spell all this time, and it was finally ready. He cast the spell on the orc, and it turned the orc's armor into a frumpy woman's dress. "Dang. I could have sworn I prepared the thing just right." The orc, of course, was shocked beyond belief. "By the 23 noses of Krag'delag-Yant!" Krag'delag-Yant, of course was the demonic twin brother of Kra'delahg-Yant. "I will be the laughing stock of all orcs everywhere!" The orc then ran off. "Well, I'd better get Yager fixed up." Piffany said.

A bit of duct tape later, Yager was back up and around again. They walked into what was a prison area. Looking into some of the cages, all they could find were more monsters and a weretiger. Then they went into the next block and found a cell with about 10 body parts in it. After Piffany duct taped them back together again, they discovered this was the henchman of the party they were looking for, a henchman named Kebwick. "Kebwick!" Nodwick said. "Uh… wha… Nodwick?" Kebwick said. "What happened to your party?" Yager asked. "Uh… last I remember, we were in the cavern of exquisite torture… they came across a mind dragon, and he breathed all over us. Shortly after that, I was taken into a room where they used me for sword practice. I couldn't resist anything." Kebwick said. "Any idea of where they took the others?" Artax asked. "No, we all got separated before I got hacked to pieces." Kebwick said. "Hmm… this is a problem indeed. We're just going to have to search for them." Artax said.

Well, shortly thereafter they came to an area where an orange dragon was. The dragon was looking mean and feeling very petulant. Then again, this female dragon was having her time of the month at that point. She saw Nodwick and his party trying to sneak around her. "Hey, what's the big idea? How dare you come into my chamber!" She shouted at them. "Erm… we got a bit lost. See, we're here looking for the remains of a party that came in here a few weeks ago. This was their henchman." Artax said as he gestured to Kebwick. "Bah! Nobody cares to remember a henchman's face! You should die!" The orange dragon roared. It then jumped up and down, knocking our heroes to the ground with the shockwaves caused by its landing. "Foolish mortals! I will slay you all!" the orange dragon said. "Run!" Yager shouted. The party rushed towards the exit as the orange dragon slashed at them. It hit Nodwick, cutting the henchman in two. "Bah! Henchmen are worth zero points!" The orange dragon shouted. "Come back here, you cowards!!" Well, somehow Artax got one of the pieces of Nodwick and Piffany got the other. When they were a safe distance away from the orange dragon, Piffany duct taped Nodwick back together. "Ow… that one was nasty. Those Orange dragon claws sting like heck!" Nodwick said. "Well, fortunately, we're past it, so now we can continue to find the others." Yager said. They went onward together.

Shortly thereafter they came to the entrance of the kitchen. There in the distance they spotted a serving wench. She was attired in a skimpy bikini and carrying an empty tray. Yager immediately started drooling. "Yager…" Piffany admonished in a gruff voice. Yager ignored Piffany and continued to drool. "All right, conference time!" Piffany said. She took Yager by the ear and jerked him aside. "Ow! Piffany! Leggo!" Yager said. The serving wench exited the place. "What have I told you about women? We are not here solely for your enjoyment!" She said. "Ow! All right, all right!" Yager said. Piffany let go of Yager's ear. "Now behave yourself." She said. "I will go first." So Piffany went up to the entering serving wench. "Sister Josanah! What in the world are you doing!?" Piffany shouted in shock and horror. The reason why is this: sister Josanah was the serving wench attired in a skimpy bikini and holding a tray now with mugs of skull-whomper ale. Piffany raced up to Josanah and stopped her dead. "Look at you! The High matron will be very not-nice with you if she sees you like this!" Sister Josanah, of course, was under the influence of a spell and didn't recognize Piffany. In fact, she didn't even acknowledge Piffany. "I must serve the ale." Sister Josanah intoned in a monotone. "Goodness. She's under the mind dragon's spell still." Piffany said. "We've got to undo it." Josanah moved around Piffany and towards the door. Artax cast a spell on Josanah. "This spell is very evil. I will need your help to counter it." He said. "I'll do anything to save a sister." Piffany replied. "When I tell you to, spray her with holy water." He said. Artax pulled some stuff out of a bag of holding and mixed it together. It was a fine powder, ready to spray on Josanah. Meanwhile, Yager and Nodwick kept Josanah busy by stealing her platter of ale. Yager couldn't resist taking a mug and drinking it down. "That ale is for the masters." Josanah intoned in a monotone voice. "All right, now!" Artax shouted. He sprinkled the powder over sister Josanah while Piffany hit her in the face with an H₂O_ly balloon. This snapped Sister Josanah out of her spell. "Uh… what happened…? I… OH MY GOD!!!" Sister Josanah covered herself up with her arms. "The high matron will kill me!" She shouted. Fortunately, our heroes were able to wrap her up in some cloth they had. "Don't worry, the high matron will understand." Piffany said. "Could you tell us what you remember?" Artax asked. "I was with the team exploring the cavern of exquisite torture. We had been captured by this not-nice red dragon. The guys tried to protect us, but the red dragon sprayed us with something. I can't remember anything until I ended up here." Sister Josanah said. "Have you found any of the others?" She asked. "Only me." Kebwick replied. "We were hoping you could lead us to Partheneon and Beltrog." Sister Josanah looked very worried. "Oh dear me. I let those two down. They're in big-time trouble." She said.

In walking on, they now had a sorcerer, a warrior, two henchmen, and two clerics. They still needed another warrior and another sorcerer. Standing in their way, however, was the very nasty and ill-tempered purple dragon. It was a very high-level dragon as well, and second only to the red dragon in rank. They entered to find the purple dragon sleeping; this was a very lucky break for them. They tried to tiptoe across the floor. Unfortunately, Yager set off a magical alarm, and this sent a flying ax right into Nodwick's chest. The purple dragon woke up and was very angry. "Who dares enter my domain!?" He shouted. The dragon then saw the party and how Piffany was tending to Nodwick. "Mortal worms! Your foolishness shall be your undoing!" It lashed out at our heroes, who dove out of the way. "Oh my! This dragon is very not-nice!" Sister Josanah said. "I've had a very bad week, mortal. You have pushed your luck too far." The purple dragon reared up and started to breathe on our heroes. "Quick! Someone do something!" Yager said. Artax cast a spell, and found himself holding a large breath mint. He then threw it into the mouth of the purple dragon. This cancelled out the dragon's power. As it breathed all over our heroes, it left a warm, gentle, spearmint-scented breeze. "Damn. As if I didn't have enough troubles today." The purple dragon said. "Just why are you being so not-nice?" Piffany asked. "I always get very cranky at that time of the month." The dragon responded. That's right, it was a female dragon having a PMS spell. "Golly gosh. I know my PMS spells can get very nasty." Sister Josanah said. "I feel your pain." Piffany added. "Can't you whip up a spell for that?" Yager asked Artax. "Believe me, there is nothing in heaven or earth that could stop a PMS case." Artax said. "I can whip up a temporary relieve pain spell, but that won't last long." The Purple dragon stared Artax in the face. "Do it, mortal, and I will spare your lives." Artax did as he was told and cast a relieve pain spell on the Purple dragon. "Now if I could just get rid of this bloated and cramped feeling." The purple dragon said. The gang used this time to sneak past the purple dragon.

Once out of sight of the purple dragon, they duct taped Nodwick back to normal. Once Nodwick was restored to life, Kebwick handed all the stuff back to Nodwick. "I think I should get hazard pay for working for your employers for one day." Kebwick said. "Talk to Heathwick when we get back to the local." Nodwick replied. "Aw, come on. We're not that bad." Yager said. "That's what you think." Kebwick said. Well, they proceeded onto the final chamber, the lair of the red dragon. This was the meanest, nastiest dragon of the bunch. "I smell mortal scum!"  The red dragon shouted. The party froze in terror. It's not every day that you run into a top-level red dragon. "You have dared to travel into my realm!" Piffany stepped forward. "We don't want to fight you, Mr. Dragon. We're looking for two of our friends who wandered I here and disappeared." She said. "A friend said that you were the last person to see them." The red dragon got angry. "You dare ask me about some pathetic mortals!?" It shouted. "Well, yes." Sister Josanah shouted. "Hmm… I've never had this happen before…" The Red Dragon said. "But I've decided I don't like it. I will roast all of you alive!" The Red Dragon drew a deep breath and all of them dove out of the way as it breathed fire all over the place. "Someone do something fast!" Kebwick said. "Quick! Use your become irrelevant power!" Nodwick said. Kebwick did so and vanished to most of the people present. The red dragon then advanced on the other heroes. Nodwick seemed to vanish as well.

"What do we do?" Piffany asked as she dove out of the way. The red dragon was very angry at this point, and continued to attack our heroes. "I've got some dragonbane. Let me see here…." Artax said. He pulled off his hat and started reaching into it. "Now, where did I put that stuff?" He said. Sister Josanah managed to tackle Artax just before the red dragon's claws would have skewered him. The resulting crash caused the dragonbane to come out of Artax's hat. Yager picked it up and threw it at the red dragon. It struck the red dragon, and burst. It didn't harm the red dragon, but it did cause him to stop for a moment. "Hmm… minty." The red dragon said. "It doesn't smell so bad in here anymore." Our heroes used this distraction to try to escape. "Hey, where do you think you're going?" The red dragon said. "I haven't finished roasting you yet." With that the red dragon resumed its attack on our heroes. It managed to singe Piffany's red hair. Yager managed to strike the red dragon with his sword, but the high-level dragon's thick hide was impenetrable to the sword. "Foolish worms! I will turn you all into skeleton warriors!" The red dragon said. Suddenly there was an arrow that came from nowhere and right into the dragon's mouth. It lodged itself in the dragon's throat. The dragon grasped its throat as it choked. "Wow! That was lucky!" Sister Josanah said. Suddenly a warrior clad in armor entered, wielding a bow and holding an arrow in his hand. "This dragon shall ne'er more torment thee!" He said. It was a bit later that the red dragon collapsed out of exhaustion. Sister Josanah recognized the warrior. "Beltrag! Thank the Gods that they found you!" Everyone approached Nodwick, Kebwick and Beltrog. "We found him and your magician in a prison cell. But we're going to need your help in putting your magician right. He's been turned into a very low form of life indeed." Nodwick said.

Well, the others went over to see what happened to their poor mage. He was turned into one of the lowest forms of life ever… no, not a lawyer, no, not a politician, not even a Young Republican. He was turned into a comic book editor. "Sir, I'm afraid we're going to have to make some changes around here to increase sales. Sisters Piffany and Josanah will now wear skimpy bikinis. We're going to have to get rid of all this duct tape nonsense." He started. "What? Get rid of duct tape?" Nodwick said. "I am not about to go parading around in a bikini." Piffany and Josanah said in unison. "We're supposed to be clerics, not some serving wenches!" Piffany added. "I have a solution." Artax said. He pulled a card out of his hat and handed it to the editor. "We're creator owned and self-published. You have no domain here." Artax said. The editor took the card and examined it. "Dang." The editor said. ** Piffany and Artax managed to undo the spell together, and turned the mage back into his old self.

Well, They gathered everyone together and went back out of the place. Naturally, they found a hidden pathway that went and led them out of the place. The journey back to town was pretty uneventful until the end. "So what did we get for rescuing these adventurers?" Yager asked. "You get the satisfaction of a job well done." Piffany replied. "How much is that in gold pieces?" Yager asked. Piffany rolled her eyes at him. "Yager, sometimes, you do things just because they need to be done." Yager wasn't too happy with this.

Henchman's local #246 opened up for the day, and Heathwick was greeted by Nodwick and Kebwick. "Ah, welcome back, Kebwick. We thought we might have lost you for good." Heathwick said. "So did you reach your 500^th resurrection?" Kebwick and Nodwick were carrying large chests full of papers. "These two chests contain all my paper work for the first week I was out." Kebwick said. "We've got another four chests like it back home." Nodwick added. Heathwick sighed. "Wonderful. We'll just pile it onto your stuff." Kebwick shook his head. "That's just for me. Nodwick's got about 5 chests worth." Kebwick said. "Well, I've got to organize your 500^th resurrection party. Go back and get all that paperwork." Heathwick said. Nodwick and Kebwick exited the place. Then Prestwick entered with another chest. "It's been very slow for me. I've only got two reams today." Prestwick said. "We'll need your help, Prestwick. Kebwick's reached his 500^th resurrection." Heathwick said. "Really." Prestwick said. "And by the looks of things, he might have reached his 750^th resurrection as well.  Then again, Nodwick's probably gotten to 1000. He was only 193 resurrections short of that." Prestwick then took his paperwork directly to the tower that housed his paperwork and that of Kurtzwick. All in all, Henchman's local #246 was able to process the paperwork in one day, mainly because they had gotten some help from Henchman's local #248 in the next shire. Sure enough, Nodwick and Kebwick reached their anniversary resurrections, so Heathwick said that they should have a joint party for this. At the party, the ale flowed freely and a stripping wench from stripper's local #341 came in to do her act. "Just don't tell anyone I did my act for henchmen. I'd be the laughing stock of all strippers everywhere." She said. In the middle of the party, everyone was doing pretty good, but then the Feud Ex people came in. "We need this message delivered to a man named Yager at once. It's from someone named Rowena." Heathwick then checked a schedule. "Let's see here… next one on the catapult is… Nodwick." He said. The Feud Ex person then grabbed Nodwick and attached him to a boulder. "Hey… wait a minute… this is my party… I can't leave until it's over…" Nodwick said as the catapult flung him home…

 

--End--

 

*As of this writing.

** Apologies to Scott Kurtz.