alone in my confusion. my whole world is a delusion.
i wonder what im seein'. the truth has no completion.
under this skin, this seal, this cage. this void. the
outside world is full of Sigmund Freuds. full of
Whitney Houstons. i dont understand the obsession.
i dont think i ever will. not in this incaseing made
of tempered steel. can never believe what i feel. too
confused to eat a meal. feels like a shield. except
there is no sword to weild. why must i know so much.
oh how i wish i had stayed sheltered. down underground.
where nothing can be found. where you curl up so round.
you never hear a sound. safe from all the pain.
shelterd from the rain. who cares about the fame.
i would rather no one know my name. then no blood would
leave a stain. feel no saddness in my brain. then i
wouldnt be so insane. and i wouldn't be caught in some
chain. following a pattern like a sped up story. where
the pauper reaches glory. and everyting is fine and
dandy. then life no longer seems like its full of candy.
and the sweetness is replaced by depression, confusion,
contempt. your life becomes unkept. and you find it
diffucult to just accept. because to the rules, your no
longer an except. even lady luck no longer finds you
charming. and you wonder what it was that you were
harming. what weeds were you farming? what did god find
so alarming? nobody knows. no... nobody knows. i used
to bring joy to all. now before me i will see it fall.
i'll return to my dark ball. and leave the world for
5000 years. only to retrun to it all. it was fun.
but now i and done. the world i must shun. i must stay
in my place and hide. where only myself can i chide.
nothing to which i must abide. i would have died. but
im too fucking proud to commit suicide. thanx for the ride.