This past week has been a momentous one. I have gotten engaged, twice! Before you start thinking that polygamy has made a sudden return to the way things are done in Taiwan, let me assure you that the same woman was involved on both occasions.
Last week Thursday night I took Pei Han to a favourite restaurant of ours where I planned to propose to her. I was going to do it on Friday night, but couldn't wait. Earlier in the evening I had picked up the diamond ring I had bought a few days earlier and planned on a nice quiet dinner before asking her to marry me. I chose this restaurant because it is a quiet, peaceful place, especially the second floor, where we usually sit. However, on that night things would turn out a little differently to what I imagined!
When we arrived we were told that the second floor air-conditioner wasn't working and so we would have to take a table on the first floor, which was crowded and noisy. So, I decided that it would be better if we sat outside, even though it was hot and muggy, because at least there was no one else out there and I would be able to make my proposal in peace. It soon became apparent though that the weather wasn't the only reason there was no one else sitting outside ... as we started eating our dinner, a regiment of mosquitoes started eating us!
Having already moved my planned proposal from Friday to Thursday, I thought that moving it from after dinner to during dinner would be fine and then we could retreat inside from the mozzie onslaught. As I readied myself to perform the act, two cars pulled up and disgorged a noisy group of patrons, who inconsiderately took their time making their way into the restaurant. Then our waitress came to check if everything was all right with us, at which point Pei Han asked her if we could move inside instead, because the mosquitoes were becoming too much to handle. While the waitress went back inside to get a tray, I took the opportunity to go down on my knee and present the ring to Pei Han and ask, in English, "Will you marry me?" She was totally surprised and practically shouted, also in English, "I do!", because that's what she had heard girls in the movies say! Just then the waitress came back with her tray.
For a moment the poor waitress didn't know what to do, seeing a man on his knee, holding a ring and about to be vigorously hugged by his girlfriend. She hesitated and then retreated back into the restaurant saying that she would come back in a minute, leaving me to place the ring on Pei Han's finger and receive a wonderfully emotional kiss! We spent the rest of the evening inside the comfortably air-conditioned restaurant receiving complicitous smiles from our waitress.
The second engagement, which should more accurately be called a betrothal, took place this week Thursday at Pei Han's parents' home. Even though Pei Han had agreed to marry me last week, this means nothing to her parents and I think they don't even know that our Western engagement occurred last week. The visit to their house was to formally ask them if I could marry Pei Han, although neither they nor I did much talking. All the discussion was mediated through my and their go-betweens, in my case two very close friends of mine, Kevin and Elaine Cheng, who are also parents of two students whom I teach. Our betrothal was concluded when I presented Pei Han's father with a red envelope on which was written my name (in Chinese) and my date and time of birth. I then also made a short speech saying that I would take care of Pei Han and thanking her parents for accepting me as their future son-in-law.
Now we wait for her parents to consult a fortuneteller about an auspicious day on which we can have our Ding Hun, our third, and final, Chinese engagement.
Dion Marc Delport
21 July 2007