It was the most fascinating experience I have had so far this year. I was dreaming and somehow my conscious mind fully turned on during my dream. I was still physically asleep, but yet I was as consciously aware as I am now. In the dream I was back in what seemed like the early 1900�s or 1910�s. I remember that I was like an observer and did not have the ability to alter events. I was however, aware of my dream self which was playing a very active role. It gave me the strangest sense of duality. I remember my conscious mind was feeling sensations of awe and fascination. My dream self was fairly indifferent. I told myself to write it all down when I woke up physically, for I was consciously there, wherever �there� was. When I awoke, it would be a simple matter of opening my eyes. At this thought, my eyes flared open and I instantly thought to get pen and paper.
But the strangest thing began to happen. Even though I had been there and witnessed and experienced it all, the dream began to cloud as all dreams do. Consciously I was very frustrated as I desperately tried to scribble down the details before they faded away. But all the while I could feel the subtle �knowing� and assurance of �all is as it should be�. They are not words, but a mere understanding posed in thought and feeling. A simple reassurance whispered or empathized from the spirit.
Now this I just realized in writing this entry. The whole dream incident was almost certainly like a sort of reverse astral projection. Instead of the spirit or subconscious mind voyaging into the conscious realm, it was the conscious mind voyaging into the spiritual or dream world. I am amazed. And since the event I have been receiving strange feelings of temporal displacement. As if time were not so linear as we might think. It imparts upon me in some way a strange sense and feeling of immortality. As time goes on it becomes harder to say which consciousness is more real. In looking at the whole situation now, I must say that things are happening at a much accelerated rate compared to previous stages of growth and understanding. I must also say that there is another factor.
The other factor is Matt. I knew long ago on a deeper level that Matt would play a role somehow in my life. It was the initial feeling of that �destiny effect� I have mentioned before. It has been many years since I first felt it and in fact we never met until these many years later. But all those years of not knowing how or when are finally coming to light. It is as if a large number of pieces are falling into place as the realizations hit me. I can not be as specific yet as I would like, but seeing things come to light gives me a greater sense of confidence. And I feel I am more and more operating closer to the spiritual reality. I can feel it stronger than ever before. Unfortunately it seems to separate me even more from physical reality and takes me even deeper into the realm of thought and mind.
Anyway, Matt seems to be a catalyst for my own personal realizations. Perhaps simply by entering into my own sphere of reality as I somehow always knew he would. Funny thing. The only person I can think of that is left that I have felt the �destiny effect� from is Rudy Galindo. I find it amazing that it has been over a year already since the feeling struck me by looking at his picture. I can�t say with any certainty, but I wonder if we are ever meant to meet. Perhaps he was only meant to lead me that day to Mr. Williamson when I delivered the letter to Rudy�s house. That in itself was a remarkable and wonderful experience. But who is to say? Maybe the greatest adventure is still yet to be where he is concerned. I simply don�t know. But whatever the case I trust that �all is as it should be�.
~FIN
