Warnings: OOC, Silliness, Mentions of shounen ai (RanKen, OmiNagi)

'No! This can't be happening! This... It's not...' Omi sat on the edge of his bed. It was rather late at night, but he was awake with realization. 'How can this be happening to me?'

Tsukiyono Omi sat on the edge of his bed in anger. he clinched his fists and shut his eyes, a deep growl rising in his throat. He leaned back and began to thrash and kick violently against the bed, in a very Farfarellic manner. He began to scream as his stomach knotted and twisted beneath his skin, making him almost sick. He just wanted to die.

It would be so easier to end it all now. The blond teenager didn't want the others to see him like this. He didn't want them or anyone to see what he was becoming. He didn't even wanna see it himself. He jerked the lamp from the table by his bed and growled as he threw it to crash on the wall at the other side of the room.

"Damnit." Ken rolled over to face his lover in the bed beside him. "What in hell is going on in there?"

The red head sighed, burying his head deeper into the pillow, "Youji's probably raping the kid... Go back to sleep."

"Yea... I suppose you're right." The brunette laid back down quietly, and scooted closer to his lover.

Youji blinked and pulled back the sheets, being careful not to wake any of the 23 wenches currently sharing his quarters with him. Still in a rather drunken state, he hiccuped and listened as across the hall, terror was reigning within Omi's room. He then turned to see one of the ladies watching him in a confused manner.

"He needs a friend." She jerked her head in the direction of the door. "Badly."

Balinese grunted and smiled sloppily in her direction. "Go befriend him, Mai."

"Alright..." She stood slowly, slipping back into her skin tight red dress. As she opened the door to step out she turned back to the play boy assassin. "And Youji... Mai is the one in the corner beside your dresser. I'm Asuka."

"Oh yea... Asuki..." He mumbled stupidly, drunken and half asleep.

"Asuka!" She slammed the door behind her.

"...zzzZzz.... Good night.... 'suka" The assassin slept on.

Omi gripped the toothbrush tightly in his hand. "This can't be happening-"

Knock knock

A look of terror crossed the boy's face. They had heard him! How could he have been such a fool as to make so much noise. Now they would want to see him! "Who is it?"

"Asuka." Came a soft female voice.

The blond clenched his fist, "You're trying to hurt me, aren't you God? You just want to make me miserable! Gurr... Well, I'll show you!" He gripped the toothbrush tightly and walked to the door, swinging it open quickly.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!" The girl shrieked at the thing that had answered the door.

Omi flicked the toothbrush at her with the accuracy and speed of one of his darts. It flew into her skull, buryinging itself deep between her eyes. Asuka was dead.

He smiled and slammed the door again. "I'm going to hurt you, God."

"Urgh! What is going on over there?" Ken sat up quickly, only to be pulled down just as swiftly by the redhead's strong arm.

"...We already settled that matter." The redhead didn't even bother to open his eyes and watch the look Ken was giving him.

"Well... But..." Ken sighed, "I guess I just didn't know Omi screamed so much like a woman."

The play boy assassin and his, now, 22 wenches were resting peacefully until-

"Rebecca, stop snoring!"

"Sorry."

"..zzzZzZ..."

Omi tapped at his window seal, at the full moon shining in the deep velvet sky above. It shown like a crystalline teardrop glowing as it fell slowly into a dark ocean. Why was God doing this to him? He was a monster now. There was no way to stop what he was becoming.

With a loud gulp, Omi fell to the floor. And, he wept.

"Ran... I think Omi's crying..." Ken nudged his partner, waiting for responce.

"Must've hurt." The redhead didn't even flicker an eye open.

"I don't think that was Omi that screamed... I think it was a woman..." Ken blinked suddenly. "Could Omi be... straight?"

Ran sat up in a flash, reaching for his katana. "Shi ne, heterosexuals!"

And, with that, the the two ran out into the hall.

Youji's ear perked up at the sound of weeping across the hall. "Aww..." The playboy seemed almost smitten in a drunken stupor until, "SHUT THE HELL UP, OMI!"

The crying seemed to increase in volume, and the slam of someone's door was heard out in the hall. From the correct focus of the sound range, at which the waves were caused from a 106 degree angle from the balanced positioning of the wood, slightly faultering the waves to be from a distance far to the right. Yes, Aya and Ken were up.

There was a pause in the rough footsteps as Ken's muffled voice was heard, "Ran! You forgot your pants!"

There was a low responce from the redhead, and Youji was tempted to peak outside for a look.

There was a brief span of 36 seconds in which Ran went back to his and Ken's room to put on some pants. Then the two continued to the door of the loudly weeping bishounen.

Suddenly two male screams echoed and rebounded through the hallway. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!" There was no doubt that Youji had to see what was going on.

The blond playboy assassin stumbled from his room, leaving the now awake wenches to ponder in confusion at what was going on outside. Still extremely inebriated, he did not mind the fact that he was clothed only in a cheeta-spotted thong. "What the hell-- AAAASSSUUUKKKKKAAA!!!!!!" His wail was loud as he fell over beside the body of the dead Asuka. "I LOVED YOU, WOMAN!"

Ran held his katana ready to pounce on the 17 year old when he emerged from the door into the room, but first he decided timidly knock to make his presence known. "Shi ne, heterosexual-"

All of the Weiss boys were surprised to find little Omi hunched over by the window, as they stumbled in.

"What's wrong, Omi?" Leave the asking to dearest Kenken.

"No..." Omi sobbed loudly, "I..." Again, "He..." Again, "But..." Again, "I can't..." Again, "So..."

There was a chorus of blinking as this continued on for the next five minutes. Finally Aya was growing irritated, "Speak clearly."

Omi only sobbed worse, and finally stopped talking altogether.

"Aww, I'm so sorry Omi." Ken made a sympathetic face, "Just use a pin. It happens to the best of us."

Youji and Aya shared glances of confusion. Aya tapped Ken, "You understood that?"

The soccer player nodded, "He says that he got a gigantic zit and didn't even know it was there, until his date with Nagi tonight, and Nagi dumped him because he said he couldn't be seen with a 'pimple-face'. So he's spent the last hour looking up Farfarello's cellphone number so that he can join the ranks of 'hurting God' for all of his suffering. He said Nagi was the one who answered the phone, and he wouldn't let him speak with Farfarello because 'Farfie' was having a session of 'let's chase Bradly with the steak knife for sending me to the doctor yesterday'. And now his whole life's falling apart, and Asuka answered the door and screamed at the hidious zit on his face and he had to throw the toothbrush at her to get her to shut up, as his first act of hurting God, except he dosen't think it hurt God much to begin with since she was one of Youji's whores and we all know they're going to Hell anyway, so now he wants to commit suicide." The boy put his hands on his knees, panting in exhaustion.

"Oh." A simoultanious answer from the two eldest of Weiss.

From his spot by the window, Omi nodded, his back still to them.

"Aa, come on bishi, it can't be that bad." Youji smiled, stepping forth.

Omi turned around.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" A loud scream from all three of the boys standing in the doorway.

"It's alive!" Shrieked Youji.

"It has a mind of it's own!" Screamed Aya.

"It's gonna blow!" Yelled Ken, grabbing the other two and ducked behind the bed, as surely enough... The large zit of Omi's face exploded.

When they stood amoungst the sticky, slightly nausiating, mess of the destructed zit, they saw that Omi's face was clear again. The bishounen smiled happily waving his hands in victory. "I'm saved! I must call Nagi!" He dashed for the phone as the other Weiss members excused themselves, quickly from the room.

Youji shuddered violently, "Oh... That was so sick." He made a gagging noise.

Aya nearly fainted, his face paler than usual.

Ken was already hanging over the toilet possessively, his face as green as the color green (Har har har).

The playboy assassin turned back and entered his room (still full of exotic women), now forgetting about Asuka. He was still slightly drunk, might as well pull some fun while it lasts, eh? There was much giggling from his room for the rest of the night.

After the puking spell, Ken shoved Aya into their room, where he fell onto the bed, closely followed by the soccer player.

"Oh damn..." Ran lifted himself suddenly, as Ken was just drifting to sleep again.

"What...?" The brown haired boy sighed into his pillow.

"I forgot to kill Omi." The redhead reached once more for his katana.

"He said he was going to call Nagi, though." A sleepy voice from Ken.

"So?"

"Ran..." Ken looked up at his lover's confused gaze, and in a jovial voice blinked in dim amazement at the sudden stupidity expelled by his lover, "You're not the brightest crayon in the box, are you?"

Ran's violet gaze narrowed into an icy glare, "I'm not a crayon, Ken."

The soccer player shook his head in frustration. "Just go to sleep." And he followed his own advice before he hit the pillow.

The redheaded assassin sighed and relaxed back into his temporary comatose state as well.

Just another night in the Koneko.


OWARI

Strange.
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