last friday there was a gig. this 'gig' was at the vic, the most notoriously notorious for under age everything and biggest shithole in keighley. it was meant to have been the week before, but due to unforseen circumstances- someone cancelling it (how much more unforseen can you get?) it had been.... cancelled. right, so it gets to gig time and unfortunatley my mummy wont let me out unless she's force fed me some food, so when the gig started i was at home with a plate of rice, meaning that i had the misfortune to miss a bit of FAT PRIEST's first little bit. but not all of it, oh no. infact i think most of keighley could hear them. an earwitness reports.."i heard rich's* band on Saturday night. i was coming out of Sainsburys and i said 'is that rich?' he started singing and i was all 'hahaha thats rich parr' *rich is how the singer of the band FAT PRIEST is commonly known at Allsports. so anyway. singing along as i went up the stairs and when i got in SHOCK HORROR noone was dancing. but the band sounded good and were playing nice bouncy songs so what was the problem?? it was scary to dance in the big scary floor on your own with scary moshers on all sides of you. but FAT PRIEST were just too good. in spite of the 'oh my god do i look like a retard' factor some 'people' (using this term lightly) began to 'dance' (same again) but then FAT PRIEST stopped playing. when they started again it was starting to become clear that the 'people' 'dancing' did look like retards because they were. but even they could not fail to be charmed by some verrrrry verrrrry fun greenday coverage. yey!!!!! Also on this night several of FAT PRIEST's own songs were aired. Although only one of them stuck in my mind with its id-be-a-really-cool-song-if-you-knew-me-ness (ermmm born in a nuthouse) I was told that they were all pretty good. I also noticed that at one point FAT PRIEST played Sugar by system of a down and about ONE of the small children knew the words, which was nice. although Joe later said 'ooh nooo it was really bad it went all wrong' the audience reaction was 'arent they good?'- they were tons better that the last time i heard them and i thought they were good even then
so then this band BREENE comes on. and alot of people seem quite happy that they're there and are all dancey and stuff. but BREENE are way too hardcore to just be all 'dooby dooby doo' and just play. oh nooo, the drummer, one Kurt Wood, ruthlessly interrupted the first song by breaking a drumstick. kurt is known to be a very violent drummer, only second to Animal from Sesame street or is it the muppets? And this event only proves it. Although the band played mostly their own material, which can sometimes be a disadvantage when such a large proportion of the crowd only enjoys hyped up pop-punk which they have been fed like battery chickens for about 5 months, they still went down really well. The people in the crowd were singing along to not just the covers, and there was a 'chair pit' over in the corner, which was responsible for the untimely demise of several chairs. Sadly no teenyboppers were hurt in the pit, although a few mistakes were made, such as Eddy going topless-I mean forgetting the words a lot, no one minded. BREENE were like a band on their little dirt track to getting a bit better than we were-dom , with young fans screaming and giggling, older fans saying 'ch! They're such sellouts' and 'kill the teenyboppers' and even strange fans hurling thongs at the band. Then asking for them back. Much like in a circus (not a Circus?) stuff was going on all over the shop, although the performing dogs did get really tiresome after 10 minutes. One hobo said 'im not dancing coz theres too many teenyboppers'. There was band swapping excitement as first Hayley took to the stage in a freakish experiment involving Blink 182 (eek! Squealed the small children) and Eddy not having a clue what was happening. Hayley did brilliantly by not hitting eddy over the head as he ballsed up her path to superstardom. Later on it was the turn of Becky to take to the stage, ermm not too sur what happened there coz one minute it was becky then you blinked and oooh Kurt was back-how straaange! So anyways, BREENE played good FAT PRIEST played good and most people went home happy yey!!!