Disclaimer: I do not own and LoK, Star Wars etc. I made no money off of this. I do this because of my warped mind. Enjoy the fruit of it ^^

Saturday Night: 9:12 p.m.

Moebius sat in the corner of his favorite tavern, brooding. This was his third mug of ale. He was angry, tired, alone and was pretty sure the candle in front of him was mocking him. Ever since those blasted vampires came about his hasn’t had a single date since. This made him very, very angry. Pillar guardians were popular at one time. Who wouldn’t want to be with one? The power at their disposal, their keen minds...really, who wouldn’t want one?

But noooo....now there were those vampires.

All of them attracted heir own private little hordes. The fangirls even got violent over them at times. Who got violent over a Guardian? No one. All of them had their own little hord of fangirls. He was pretty sure that somewhere out there, even Melchiah had at least one. Janos, Vorador, Kain, right down the line, all of them had fangirls. He didn’t have so much as one. No one loved him.

He downed his third, and kept going on to his next one.
 

Saturday Night: 10:48 p.m.
 

He was now working on his seventh mug, the candle significantly smaller but was still mocking him. There had to be something he could do about it. Something he could do to put himself back in the dating scene. Something....

Yesss......

He could do something.....

He had the power....

He had the people....

All he would have to do is kill them off one by one until he got them all and then he would be back in the dating scene.

He narrowed his eyes, glaring at the candle, trying to intimidate it. The thing blew a raspberry at him,, or at least he thought so, and thus he blew it out. He laughed at the candle.

Yes. He would topple their line. Starting at the very top with Janos. The blue winged Ancient would be first, fellow guardian or no.

He downed this last drink, stumbled over to the bar, paid his tab and teleported away.
He would have appeared inside Janos’ home, but the Ancient used his magic to keep unwanted visitors out. He stood at the bottom of the cliff, looking up at the dizzying height. This only made him angrier. How the heck was he supposed to kill him if he couldn’t get to him?

Bah! I’ll just make him come down here to me.

He called a spell that would allow him to project his voice better and shouted up at the cliff. “Ay! Yous! Jhanos! Git yout pale blue arse down ‘ere n fighit mre now!”

Up above on the cliff, Janos moved away from one of the fangirls he was talking with and walked over to the balcony. He looked down, his keen vision picking up a familiar, though drunkenly standing figure. “What did I supposedly do now?”

“Git down ‘ere n fighit you weenged panshey!”

Janos tilted his head, confused. “Flowers? I don’t have any up here, sorry.”

“I meat it! Git down ‘ere.”

“Sorry, I can’t help you Moebius. Have a nice night,” Janos said, walking away.

“Don’t mind him,” one fangirl said. “He’s just jealous.”

“Yes,” said another. “I want a ‘bed time story’” She grinned suggestively, “With some blueberry swirl.”

Janos smiled, having gotten used to being compared to some odd fruit, and knowing what the phrased meant. Oy, these girls were out to kill him.
 

Below, Moebius roared with rage, and fell over himself. He had to find a way in there and soon, lest the vampire run off somewhere. He grinned. When he was done, he could put his charms on the fan girls. He laughed and started looking.
 

Sunday morning: 2:14 a.m.

Moebius finally found a way in. It was a strange way, and swimming while drunk was far from amusing. That and all the fish in the lake laughed at him. Most of the delay was from him trying to drown them, which didn’t go too well.

He dragged himself out, up out of the hole in the floor. He seriously wondered why Janos kept an indoor pool in this climate. He winced in pain, growling loudly. His headache came back now that he was out of the cold water. HE looked around, up at his goal. how the heck was he supposed to get up there? Sure there were walkways and ramps, but they didn’t look complete and like his old frame would have to leap across to get to some points.

He shook his fists in the air, yelling incoherently, then got up and stumbled up the first ramp. He almost made it too, but his wet clothes and the steepness of the ramp sent him right back down. He yelled again, ordering the ramp to grow stairs to no success then ran at it, angry still.

Higher up, in his chambers, amidst some fangirls, Janos wakened and carefully pulls himself from them, doing his best to not disturb any of them. Something was in his home uninvited and he had to get rid of it.

He walked out, and around one of the high ledges, down at the incoherently grunting and yelling being stumbling about his home. He looked closer and saw that somehow Moebius had gotten in. He blinked, wondering how he had gotten as far up as he had, then laughed at him.

Moebius half dangled off a ledge, growling. He dragged his bony form up and back onto the ledge. In front of him was yet another blood filled giant bowl. His stomach upset again from jumping and not quite landing, he lurched forward and added his own contribution to it.

Above, Janos winced and made a point that when he got rid of Moebius to clean them and refill the bowls about the lower area. He jumped, and opened his wings, landing softly to a ledge higher than Moebius, but yet closer. “I said, I haven’t any flowers here. I suggest you look elsewhere. Not much grows here you know.”

“Blag! Mrpf! Grrrrr......famprie, you muzt die! Want yous ded!” Moebius said, pulling himself up and seeing the Ancient on a ledge nearby after ten minutes of turning to try to find him.

Waiting patiently for a response, Janos watched him, seriously wondering what was wrong with him. The response he got made him wonder if the Time Streamer had taken a turn for the worse and devolved. “Are you feeling well? I could fix you some tea and send you on your way if that is what you want?”

No! No! No! Nonononono!!! Moebius’ mind screamed. Not only was he insulting him by having a hand in hogging all the fangirls, but now he wanted to poison him as well. “RAuUUrgh! No tea! You die famprie!”

“I’m quite well, thank you. I don’t expect I’ll do that for a while actually. I don’t really need you here if that’s the reason you came, if you feared for my health,” Janos said.

Moebius stumbled down another walkway and turned to Janos. “I kill you! I! Yousa dead famprie!” After he stopped speaking, he fell over again.

Janos shuddered. People already complained at his occasional tendency to quote Star Wars, but to talk like Gungan? True evil amidst here....

Moebius finished walking down the walkway and over to another leap. Janos watched him with interest, wondering how many he could cross before he missed and fell. Then he wasn’t sure if he would laugh, or if he would feel sorry for the disorientated guardian and go help him.

A while later, Moebius finally got to the same level Janos sat on. He half ran, half fell over himself, trying to get the blue Ancient, but ended up flat on his face. A little more than his body length away from Janos. Janos looked down at him, poking him in the head a few times. “I ask again, are you well?”

Moebius looked up, and crawled over to Janos. When he could, he grabbed the vampire’s leg. “You muzt die famprie!”

“Eventually I will, yes, but not right now. Again, I thank you for your concern, but you need not worry.”

Moebius ignored the vampire’s words, and pulled a dagger form his robes. Well, half a dagger. He had a hold of the handle, but it lacked a blade. It was a cheep dagger he had gotten for a dollar, and the blade broken during one of the many times he fell over. He poked Janos with it repetitively any ways, the cool plastic touching him over and over. Janos blinked and stared at Moebius, wondering if it was his mind that had gone ill.

“RAaaa-?!” Moebius stopped, and stared at Janos in return. He looked the vampire over, blinking. Then blinking again. Amazingly fast, Moebius shot up and ran off screaming like a ten year old girl, much to Janos’ amazement. Janos blinked, watching Moebius leave by far faster than he came in, then was gone, teleported away.

Janos stared at the hole in the floor below for a minute, trying to figure out why Moebius left so hastily after he seemed so determined to get to him. He looked around him, seeing everything in order, than himself. He blushed, his cheeks taking a pretty lavender shade to them. Whoopsie....forgot a robe on the way out, Janos thought. Ah well. He got up, and went back up to his bedroom. People shouldn’t be rudely dropping by uninvited any ways.

~Finis

Index