IMism

1. Do not ever mention an "inside joke" or a "shout out" in a profile. It is not funny, and no one appreciates it. Nothin is more annoying than clicking on a profile and seeing somethings such as:
           "Sharon-rubber-ducks, tequila shots a midnight, spring break, greasy pimps at the club, and                       scratchy beards!! You go girl!!" 3 Words --> NOT FUNNY

2. Do not ever put self-pity, 'emo-filled,' "I am so sad," or "I wish I had a girlfriend..." type quotes in profiles or away messages. That is pathetic. No one wants to read about how 'deep' or 'emotionally tumultuous' you think you are.

3. Do not write up profiles, away messages, or even chat in 'Ebonics,' or an attempt at 'Ebonics'. This is not funny...ever.

4. Do not ever begin an IM conversation or reply to an IM with the word "sup." That sucks. It is the ignorance of this term that makes it a part of this list. It is a contraction of a contraction...
            What is up --> What's up --> 'Sup
      This rule goes for any other contraction of a contraction

5. Do not employ your profile into a songbook.   Song quotes are fine..in moderation. And popular songs that everyone knows are not better...since everyone does already know them.

6. Do not fall into Away Message Stagnation. This common virus produces the same away messages over and over again. It is an insult to the person reading it and is a showing of a complete lacke of creativity. This goes for those 'one word' away messages:
              Food, Class, Away, etc...

7. Do not use the phrase "getting my [insert action] on...". Is there a need for explanation?

8. Do not overuse smiley faces. This also is incredibly annoying. They were meant for occasional expression, emphasis, or joking around. They were not intended to be a period to every sentence.

9. Do not IM people when you are inebriated. This is not funny and it has nothing to prove. There is no fulfillment in trying to figure out what a drunk man is saying...and once the conversation is figured out, its most likely not funny.

10. Do not 'shout-out' to your significant other with 'cute names' and expressions of how much you love them. Profiles were made to give information to others...do that but dont bore people.
            "Scotty, you are an incredible honey-bunches, and I will love you even after our corpses turn to   dust and time itself ends. I thank the Lord every second of every day of every week of every                  month of every year that I have you. I Love you dearest...this last week has been the best                       week of my life now that I am with you."