| Still, Even More Funny Thoughts |
| Why is it you can walk down a road, even if it goes uphill? Why do we say "bye bye" but not "hi hi"? Can blind people be dyslexic when they read Braille? How do you handcuff a one-armed man? Why do the call the angel of death an angel if all it does is bring pain and suffering? Why doesn't the glue in the bottle dry up? If Luke took a bath, would the water be lukewarm? If an anarchist group attained political power, would they by principle have to dissolve their own government? If you decide that you're indecisive, which one are you? Why is it we have the weight of the world on our shoulders but have to get it off our chests? Why does everyone speak different languages and have different accents if we all originally came from the same place? Why do they call it a RUNNING BACK when he is running forward? If you tell someone they are being judgmental aren't you being judgmental yourself? Why do they call it your "bottom", when it's really in the middle of your body? How come no matter what color the liquid is the froth is always white? Why do British people never sound British when they sing? Why do they call them guidance counselors when all counselors do is offer guidance? Why do they call it "head over heels in love" If our head is always over our heels? Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in the Car Pool lane? Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia? If someone can't see, they're blind and if someone cant hear, they're deaf, so what do you call people who can't smell? How do they get those boats in those glass bottles? Why would superman want to leap over the tallest building in a single bound if he can fly? Why is it called a TV set when there is only one? If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? How did the headless horseman know where he was going? Why do they call it an escalator if it takes you down? Why is it called football when you hardly use your feet? How come some Little Debbie snack cakes come in a twin pack and others are wrapped individually? Do cows drink milk? Can a guy named Nick have a 'nick'name? If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth? Since we see little birdies when we just get knocked out, what do little birdies see when they just get knocked out?? What is a male ladybug called? Why are semi-trucks bigger than regular trucks? Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on? If you wore a teflon suit, could you ever end up in a sticky situation? How fast do hotcakes sell?If you mated a bull dog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit? Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside? Does the President have to pay taxes? Why do they put "for indoor or outdoor use only" on Christmas lights? If Dracula has no reflection, how comes he always had such a straight parting in his hair? If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? Why is Grape Nuts cereal called that, when it contains neither grapes, nor nuts? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front? Isn't it kind of ominous to put your tax returns in the mail box and put up the little red flag? What ever happened to an E grade? We have A,B,C,D,F but no E. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Don't you find it worrying that doctors call treating you their "practice" ? Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? What do you call a female daddy long legs? If croutons are stale bread, why do they come in airtight packages? Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed? If a transport truck carrying a load of cars gets into a car accident, does it increase the number of the cars in the pile-up? In France do people just ask for toast and get French toast? or do they have to ask for American toast? Why is it called a "drive through" if you have to stop? Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" go out of date next year? If Milli Vanilli fell in the woods, would someone else make a sound ? Why are SOFTballs hard? Do vampires get AIDS? Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat? Why are they called goose bumps? Do geese get people bumps? Why is it that lemon dishsoap is made with real lemons, but lemon juice is artificial flavoring? If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery? Is French kissing in France just called kissing? Why can magicians make things disappear into thin air, but not thick air? Why is it that rain drops but snow falls? Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"? What do people in China call their good plates? Can you sentence a homeless man to house arrest? If feathers tickle people, do they tickle birds? Does a postman deliver his own mail? |
| Just More Funny Thoughts |
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