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I don't know how to put this lightly, so be prepared.
I'm not even going to begin by thumping the Bible, I've got plenty of time to do that later. �First of all, there is no such thing as safe sex outside of marriage, period. �Condoms, made by man to "justify" unhealthy sex, do break. �They do. �I've seen it happen, so I know first hand. �If there's any question in your mind, proper use was made of them--it didn't matter. �There are plenty of drawbacks to pre-marital sex, and no real benefits.
First of all, there's the regular health class stuff. �STD's, unwanted pregnancy as you already mentioned, herpes, warts, AIDS. �All drawbacks. �Whenever you have sex, you are joining yourself with the person you're with. �
| "The two will become one flesh." |
Kristen told me about this: Joshua Harris, in his book I Kissed Dating Goodbye, tells a story about a friend of his that had a nightmare. �She dreamed that she was at her perfect wedding, with her perfect guy. As they were about to say "I do," all these girls lined up behind the groom. They were girls he'd been physical with, given a piece of his heart to. The bride was devastated-- it's hard to shake someone's past when they've given so much of themself to others. I'd take back so much of what I've done if I could-- but I never, ever can.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 says,
| "Flee from sexual immorality. �All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. �Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? �You are not your own; you were bought at a price. �Therefore honor God with your body." |
I've had a tough time with this. �Both in my personal walk, and in trying to find an answer. �You are not alone, this is tough I know. �Here's what the Bible has to say about it though. �Both passages are from Romans:
| "Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to Him as instruments of righteousness. �For sin shall not be your �master because you are not under the law, but under grace." �6:13-14 |
| "Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. �The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. �It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. �Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God." 8:5-8 |
I'm getting better with this as I let more and more of myself go, and allow the Spirit greater freedom to move within me. Basically, what this is saying it that the desires of the flesh--in this instance masturbation--stemming from the sinful nature should not be heeded to. �Think about it like this--when you're "gettin' the job done," are you thinking, "Praise and glory to God!" or are you thinking, "Oh, this feels so good!"? �There's no need to answer that one, I already know it. �SO, your mind is fixed on the sinful nature--at least for the moment--and you are controlled by the sinful nature. �According to these passages, you cannot please God which would be sin.
Now if we go back to 1 Corinthians, we find that sexual sin is the only sin that you commit against your own body. �Now, if you were to be having sex would it not be logical that there would be, for lack of a better term, double sin going on there? �So instead of one sin, committed against yourself, you and your partner would mutually be causing one another to sin against their own body. �And did Jesus not say, "Whoever causes one of these little ones to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck."?
So therefore I say, "Do not sin at all. �But if you cannot fight your flesh, it would be far better to masturbate and only sin against yourself than to cause somebody else to sin along with you." �This is not condonement. �I already said that I struggle with this myself, so to tell you otherwise would make me a hypocrite and a liar, but that doesn't make it right. �Period.
You asked what people can do to prevent themselves from doing it. �Think about the things of God. �Sounds too simple but it works if you want it to. �You HAVE to want it to work, though. �If you don't, you'll just brush it off and keep doing what you're trying to do. �It's getting less and less frequent that I give in to my flesh and there is a time coming when my flesh is only a vessel for the Holy Spirit to work through and this will last until the day I die. �I'm not there yet, but I will be.
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