Hulk
Interview:
Me: Hello Bruce, How are you?
Bruce: Oh,I've been great lately. Haven't had an outbreak in a while so i'll ask you kindly not to anger me and awaken the beast within.
Me: Oh...yeah...sure, no problem (crossing my fingers). So I heard your an idiot, Is that true?
Bruce: What? NO, I'm a genious you little....oh...If your tying to anger me that won't do it.
Me: Right, No....I was just...Tell me, how do these breakouts come along?
Bruce: Well normally when I'm angry or frustrated with evil doers and such.
Me: Evil Eh....Well does the Hulk eat babies?
Bruce: No, he jus....
Me: Do you?
Bruce: Of course not I wou....
Me: Because I do.
Bruce: Huh?
Me: Oh yeah, I eat babies, had one for breakfast
Bruce: YOU Eat what? your an idiot...
Me: While I sexually please your mother, I enjoy a deep fried baby
Bruce: MY MOTH...(left eye twitching)
Me: As I preform sexual favors on your mother, your girlfriend preforms them on me.
Bruce/Hulk: LISTEN YOU WILL NOT MAKE ME MAD...OR ELSE!!! (face sweating and shaking)
Me: Or else what? Your feeble mind is no match to my wit!
Bruce/Hulk: I'LL SHOW YOU FEEBLE MIND!!!
Me: No thanks, I think I've seen enough already. You blubbering penis wrinkle, I laid your girlfriend because she wanted a real man not an overgrown incompetent clutz with erectile disfunction.
Bruce/Hulk: I...I...W...W...I..L..L...KI...KI...LL..LL...Y...Y..YOU! AAAARRRGGHH
Me: Not to mention an overgrown, donkey-raping, ass-face, with a speach impediment.
At this point I saw the mildly retarded beast before my eyes. Most of you don't know this but I too am a super hero. When in peril I put on my neon pink spandex underwear............and I becom....the Almighty Super Stoner or A.S.S. if you prefer. I rolled up my sleeves ready to take on this fat mental patient. It was time Hulk had his ass handed too him, and shown once and for all he's not that great. We squared off and I pounced. My groin was pumeling the Hulk's foot. Suddenly, my powerful face beat him forcefully in the fists. His eyes shimmered with fear of theAlmighty Stoner as he through me into a wall. I yelled out, "Your father was a retarded elephant and your mother a severely obese alligator." His bulging muscles rippled as I was put into a headlock. Just then the police arrived and arrested the hulk.(I had slipped my wallet into his pants) I acted as though i was seriously injured. I even went through a rehabilitation program to keep the gimmick going. The Hulk was sentenced to 5 years in prison because the police believed he mugged me. I got off scott free despite the ass-whooping I dished out.
(I have recently gained back the use of my legs in rehab. Which I continue to attend as a joke you see.)