Before the Night Is Over 
By Cyrelia

"It's finally over." Trowa's soft voice was barely a 
whisper penetrating the silence around them as he stared 
down from the balcony, the night's breeze washing past him 
carrying a soft melody of hushed regret as he watched the 
garden below. Small flickers of light blinked on and off as 
the fireflies danced through the air, one errant flash of 
light settling upon the petals of a rose illuminating it 
from the inside making the flower glow a faint beautiful 
blushing scarlet before its brilliance flickered out into 
the darkness once more. He closed his eyes for a moment and 
sighed in contentment simply absorbing the atmosphere of 
blissful solitude around him.

A faint knock at the door alerted him to Quatre's presence 
on the other side of it. "Trowa?" came the muffled inquiry. 
Not turning around still gazing at the world outside of the 
walls of his suite his reply was a hesitant "Come in." A 
faint creak was the only indicator that there was another 
presence in the room, Quatre's footfalls themselves being 
silent as they padded across the plush gray carpet. "Trowa, 
I came to see if you're alright. You left after dinner 
without saying a word to the others. They're concerned for 
your well being y'know." He came up and stood next to him 
intimately, though neither one of them were actually 
touching the other. "And you?" he asked wistfully. Quatre 
turned stunned at the question not so much directed at 
himself but more to Trowa's own consciousness. "Trowa..."

"Do you concern for me Quatre?" Those words were 
unanticipated and left him speechless before he could 
accurately process it. "O-of course I do Trowa." he looked 
at him puzzled. "Why would you even ask such a thing." He 
turned away. "No reason. I just... never mind. Forget I 
asked." He started to walk away but was seized by the wrist 
and pulled back around forcefully but gently to face 
Quatre. "please don't walk away Trowa. I can sense 
something's wrong. I can feel it inside of my heart. And it 
hurts to think I might be the cause." Shock clearly 
registered in the un hidden emerald orb staring back at 
him. "No. How could you ever think that I..."

"Well then what is it? Please tell me."

"Nothing." he replied more harshly than he had intended. 
But it's the only way, he rationalized. I can still keep 
him from being hurt by what I'm about to do. "Just leave 
Quatre." he pushed him away violently. "Leave Quatre!" 
Stunned by the change in attitude, he started to walk away 
when the part of him that had loved Trowa since the first 
moment he saw him refused to accept the the rejection, 
refused to leave Trowa when he was upset and alone. "No! 
Trowa, I won't leave! I don't understand what's going on 
with you but I want to! Please let me help you!" Trowa 
faced him back like a cornered animal fighting to keep away 
an intruder trying to break into his heart. He could have 
the world on a silver platter. What would he even want 
anything to do with me. I'm nothing. I'm no one. To him or 
anyone else. "Why Quatre?! Why should I?! Why the Hell do 
you even care what happens to me anyway whether I live or 
die?!" A small stream of tears trickled down his face and 
he tried to blink them away. Why am I crying? I don't 
understand this. I'm not even alive inside anymore and yet 
they won't stop. I don't understand. "Because Trowa I..."

"Don't' Quatre." He knew what was coming and couldn't bear 
to hear it. Not now, if you say it I might lose my resolve. 
"I love you." His voice trailed off at the end yet they 
words registered clearly. Those three words broke through 
the barrier he had carefully erected around his heart as it 
came crumbling down. Such a foolish whim. That your light 
has broken through my veil of apathy. "But it changes 
nothing he said to himself."

"Trowa?" Did I say that out loud. No! he can never no. He'd 
try to stop me. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing." Quatre looked at him again noticing the shift in 
his eyes as the light shut out of them and they became 
hollow once more. Dead once more. "Don't do this to me 
Trowa! Don't shut me out. I have to know what it is you 
mean!"

"I can't!... I can't" his voice ended on a subdued note. 
"You wouldn't understand." 

"Don't make assumptions about me Trowa. I might seem 
delicate to you, but remember I fought in the war as well. 

I'm not just going to break."

"You won't. But I might."

"Not if I don't let you." 

They stood there in an endless silence until Trowa finally 
spoke. "When I was with the mercenaries, I can still 
remember them speaking of their lives. Of their regrets, 
and what they had always wished to do but had never done 
with themselves. They were miserable deep down inside 
Quatre. Miserable because when they were young like we are, 
they had so many opportunities for better futures. To not 
just live life but to truly experience it. Don't you see?! 
They wasted their lives away, and grew old never having 
done all the things they wanted to do. I promised myself 
I'd never come to that. I'd sooner die."

"No Trowa you don't mean..."

"I do." he replied with gravity. " I promised myself if I 
ever survived this war that wouldn't happen. But there 
wasn't anything I wanted that badly. Until I met you. So I 
gave myself one night past the war. One last night to live 
before I die." he lowered his head shaking it regretfully. 
"It was selfish of me. Falling in love with you. But I 
couldn't help myself. You were my angel Quatre. You saved 
me from drowning in my own darkness. And now that I know 
you love me, my life is almost complete."

"Trowa you don't have to do this! We've finally found one 
another. We could be happy for the rest of our lives 
together!"

"I can't. I'd never fit into your world, nor you into mine. 
We'd grow to resent one another. And though I could live 
the rest of my life with you even if you didn't love me 
anymore, I'd never want that for you."

"But Trowa..."

"I know this is being presumptuous, but I have to ask. 
Quatre, would you do me one last favor?"

"Anything." he said firmly his own eyes growing moist as he 
took Trowa's hand into his kissing the palm gently. A small 
gasp escaped him, the sensation was so new. 

"Quatre, would you... make love to me?"

"You don't need to ask Trowa. You never need to ask."

"Please forgive me for this Quatre." Quatre slowly leaned 
forward and planted a tended kiss upon each of his eyelids. 

"Shh. I'm just happy I can know you like this if for only 
one last night my love." He whispered softly. He pulled 
Trowa into a tender embrace rubbing his back in a gentle 
circular pattern his hands sliding underneath the soft 
fabric of his turtleneck. He kissed Trowa gently on the 
lips becoming encouraged when he received a tentative 
response. He ran his tongue across them slowly then sliding 
it between Trowa's lips as he parted them letting out 
another small gasp. Trowa's own tongue shyly darted forward 
to meet his as Quatre plundered his mouth over and over 
tasting everywhere inside. He pulled back for an instant 
motioning towards the bed. Trowa smiled at him and was 
surprised when suddenly he was swept off of his feet and 
carried in Quatre's arms to the bed. He was placed down 
gently on his back and Quatre sat on the edge of the bed 
next to him leaning over placing a kiss on his forehead 
before he rolled over straddling Trowa bending over 
capturing his mouth once again a low moan coming from deep 
within his throat as their two cloth covered arousals 
ground together, that single point of contact sending both 
of their bodies aflame with passion. Trowa slowly fumbling 
around blindly, undoing the buttons of Quatre's shirt hands 
trembling. Quatre paused just long enough the assist him 
and easily shed the garment sliding Trowa's own shirt up 
and then over his head. 

He licked the hollow at the base of Trowa's throat the 
cluster of nerves while one hand lovingly toyed with a 
rapidly hardening pink nipple. His mouth worked its way 
down lower, taking the other into it suckling gently 
pulling, stretching the skin's elasticity. Quatre became 
aware of the small whimpers Trowa was making, and the hands 
which gently but insistently urged him lower. He moved, 
spreading Trowa's long graceful legs and settled himself in 
between them He undid the tight jeans Trowa usually wore, 
noting with satisfaction the erection which strained 
against the simple white boxers. He hurriedly pulled off 
the jeans and then slid the white undergarments off as 
well. He barely registered removing his own pants however 
he tossed them to the floor impatiently so he could resume 
where he left off. His tongue darted out first licking the 
inside of Trowa's thigh, moving along higher until he 
reached his goal. He planted a kiss on the tip of Trowa's 
hardened manhood which was as he observed exactly like 
Trowa himself, long and elegant. Trowa froze at the feel of 
Quatre's lips upon him more exquisite than anything he had 
ever felt in his entire life. But nothing could prepare him 
for the hot tongue which licked his entire length. He 
reached the head, taking only the tip into his mouth, 
tasting the precome sweeter than ambrosia, stabbing his 
tongue into the slit needing to taste more. Quatre could 
feel himself becoming even more excited hearing Trowa gasp 
and pant as he worked. Quatre reached his hand up inserting 
two fingers into Trowa's mouth which he sucked dutifully 
with abandon all the while making small whimpering noises. 

Quatre never imagined the sounds of another's pleasure 
could so fully arouse him. He finally took pity on the 
squirming boy beneath him and holding him down, with an 
agonizing slowness he took him into his mouth relaxing the 
gag reflex, and swallowing him all the way to the root. He 
quickened his pace in time with Trowa's gasps bobbing his 
head up and down faster, pulling his fingers out of Trowa's 
mouth, sliding them past his balls and inserted his index 
finger slowly into the tight rosebud of Trowa's anus. He 
could feel Trowa tense up at first, so he focused on moving 
faster, his finger searching for that one spot until he hit 
that small lump, stroking it hearing Trowa's breathing 
becoming ragged as the hot liquid came rushing into 
Quatre's waiting mouth. He spit it back out into his palm, 
knowing he was going to need it for what he was about to do 
next. He generously coated his own throbbing member with 
one hand, the other still milking the gland, as he watched 
with desire, Trowa becoming feverish in his panting, once 
again full erect. "Quatre, I want... I need..." The words 
refused to articulate themselves,though Quatre knew exactly 
what he meant. He withdrew his finger, but placed Trowa's 
ankles on his shoulders, and soon had the head of his penis 
at Trowa's entrance, needing this more than anything he 
ever had. 

He slowly pushed in, meeting an initial resistance, but 
finding it easier as Trowa relaxed until he was all the way 
in to the hilt looking at Trowa's face, eyes shut tightly, 
sweat beads on his forehead. He couldn't wait much longer, 
but he needed to first make sure of one last thing. "Trowa, 
please, look at me." Those green emeralds, glazed heavily 
with need gazed back at him, pleading. "Now... Quatre..." 
Quatre smiled at him, then pulled almost all the way out 
before pushing back in slowly, repeating the same rhythmic 
thrust, finding it hard not to come when being held by such 
a tight heat, but he'd be gentle for Trowa. In long 
measured stokes he'd thrust into Trowa who beneath him was 
still looking back at him, completely overwhelmed with 
sensation, emitting a small gasp every so often. Quatre was 
driving him out of his mind with his pace, and Trowa was so 
close to the brink he couldn't stand it anymore. "Quatre... 
I can't... please..." Caught up in his own world of 
sensation, Quatre couldn't help but comply pulling out then 
pushing back in roughly, seizing both of Trowa's legs, 
quickening his pace, slamming into that tight cavern over 
and over again, now hitting that spot inside Trowa every 
time while the other clutched at the sheets making small 
mewling noises which made him sound like a cat in heat, 
until he finally couldn't take it any longer and in a 
blinding white rush he came, covering both he and Quatre in 
his own essence. Quatre had been been pushed over the edge 
when he felt Trowa tighten around him and he filled Trowa 
with with own fluid, leaning forward to kiss him gently 
before pulling out. He collapsed on top of him, whispering 
faintly before sleep could claim him, "Ai shiteru Trowa. 
Forever."

Trowa smiled regretfully before reaching over on the 
nightstand and taking a drink of what would've appeared to 
be wine, but was in fact a rare poison to obtain legally. 
He took a long drink before closing his eyes. "I'm sorry 
Quatre. But you'll always be in my heart." I'm glad though. 
I might have gone the rest of eternity without ever knowing 
true happiness. A small smile appeared on his face before 
he slept. Thank you.

Quatre awoke later feeling cold. He looked up sleepily 
realizing the source of his discomfort. Trowa's body was no 
longer warm and lay still beneath him. But how did he? It 
was then He noticed the empty glass on the night stand. 
Without even a goodbye. I understand why you did it Trowa, 
if i had never known you, I might have felt the same but... 
now. Now I'm only half a person. Why couldn't you have 
understood that you were what made me whole. I'm sorry 
Trowa, but I'm afraid I can't let you do this by yourself. 
he briefly thought of reading Romeo and Juliet in their 
last boarding school /I will kiss thy lips. Haply some 
poison yet doth hang on them to make me die with a 
restorive/ He kissed Trowa one last time before feeling the 
weight of slumber claim him once more. No one ever told you 
you had to do this alone. And I love you too much to live 
the rest of my life without you. Wait for me Trowa. I'll be 
there soon.

-owari-