It starts out and the general idea is: David Arquette is marrying that woman who said "yes" on Leno, I think her name's Kelly Hammond. Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit promises to attend.

This guy I know gets some gold telescopes. He gives one to my friend, who gives it to me.

Suddenly, I'm running through a big, dark purple room, fighting off these woman-like things, they may have been women but I'm not sure. Yeah, I think they were women. They were wearing all purple and had dark, long hair, and were firing blasters at me. I fought back with flying kicks and running like hell.

I then went out a large set of wooden doors, and found myself in a purple city, on a tall building. Everything was shades of purple since it was night in a futuristic world, see? So there's ledges and stuff, and using the telescope, I see this other friend of mine. I show him the telescope and say, "You won't believe how I got this." He then takes control of the Statue of Liberty behind him, and makes it jump high, still connected to the stand it's on. I barely get out of it's way as it comes down, then take control of another Statue of Liberty, destroying him by making the statue land on his statue's about 5 times.

I go back inside the room and fight the women again, then chase one up a ladder into a dark, wooden crawlspace. This crawlspace is regular color, not purple, and goes off about a yard to the left of the ladder, and two yards to the right. I notice there is a dark, square opening at the end of the right side of the crawlspace. I find a tissue. Inside was the head of a snake. I toss it out of the crawlspace, down the ladder. I notice there is a dark square at the end of I find a pile of rubber snakes, and I hit one on the head with a nearby small box. I find a small, purple music box with a black crank and a small, black, removable plastic piece sticking out of it. It has a hole in it. I turn the crank and the music plays. I find a small, glass vile that fits into the hole in the plastic piece. I place it in there and turn the crank. The music plays. I put the box down and decide to go out the black square shape.

Suddenly, there is the outdoor wedding scene. I don't seem to exist any more as a character in the dream. There is a rocky hill to the right of the wedding, with the small, black square in it. Running out of the hole is some train tracks about a foot and a half wide. There is a crowd of people who I can't identify. Vertical Horizon's "Everything You Want" is playing.

David Arquette and Kelly Hammond are in front of the crowd, facing each other. Kelly is wearing a wedding dress. David is wearing a tux and black swimming eye goggles.

To the left of them are Fred Durst, wearing his regular clothing with the red hat and all, and Donald Duck, also wearing his traditional blue sailor outfit, sans the hat. Fred pull out a mask. It is a flesh colored face with long horns coming out of the top. He puts it on, and a priest appears, wearing the same mask and a flesh body suit that matches it. Between his limbs are flesh colored membranes, which kinda make him look like a demonic starfish. Fred lifts up his own mask for a second, adjusts it, and puts it back on. It starts to rain.

The priest walks in front of the couple and suddenly, he is no longer wearing the mask or body suit. Instead, he is wearing gold roman guard armor.

David and Kelly are smiling at each other, crying tears of joy. There is a small collection of frothy saliva under David's lip.

The song goes into it's chorus, and the priest talks along with the words, addressing Kelly.
"He is everything you want, he is everything you need. He is everything inside of you that you wish you could be. He says all the right things at exactly the right time, but he means nothing to you and you don't know why."

Suddenly, out of the hole in the hill, a train that was set up by Donald comes out. At the front of the train, which lacks an engine or cars, instead carrying light purple platforms, is Dumbo, playing a horn in his trunk and surrounded by flowers. Then is a large amount of platforms with large bushels of flowers on them, followed by five sailboats on a clothesline, with flowers in the sails.

Someone says the train is going too slow, since the wedding is supposed to be to the beat of the song. Donald goes behind the train and kicks it. His foot gets caught and he is dragged away with it. Daisy rescues him and kisses him, and they run back to the wedding as not to miss anything.

Then I wake up, and find that the song was playing on the radio. I'm gonna buy that CD.

Pee-Wee tries to Irish Whip the Monster, but a cloth on the Monster's arm strecthes out, so Pee-Wee can't whip him. The Monster starts beating on Pee-Wee.

Suddenly, the crowd starts chanting down from ten, signaling a new wrestler is about to come out. They reach one, then start cheering, and the wrestler (or wrestlers', in this case) theme starts playing.

"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Heroes in a Half-Shell. Turtle Power."

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles come out and start partying around the ring, climbing the turnbuckles and all that, then begin to attack the other wrestlers. Michaelangelo tries to Irish whip the Monster, who's arm-cloth pulls out. So Michaelangelo pull out a pair of scissors and cuts the cloth, and the Monster falls to his back.

Then the Royal Rumble continues and the Ninja Turtles are doing body slams and Pee-Wee's doing his kicks, and suddenly I wake up.

Damn.

Tokker

When I was at UBCon, there was this dude who walked by dressed like that dude from The Avengers. He had a suitcase with him. I thought he was gonna bomb the place.

Anyway, his clothing sort've found it's way into my subconscious. I was at my house and this little midget wearing the aforesaid clothing and white face paint with black tears painted under the eyes is there. He's some sort of official for something or other, and he's taking down my height and length of hair. He measures my hair with some kind of clamp. He then measures my chin hair with it. Then he jumps in the air, still holding the clamp, and when he lands he tears out the right side of it. It's funny.

So suddenly, I'm in Tops International. There a general news story that a person named Tokker wasn't what he says he is. It's generally suggested the the midget is Tokker.

So I go to the right side of the store, to an area lit by black lights. There was a picnic table, with goths around it. Goths are cool.

I sit down, and start chatting. One goth dude offers me some white and black make-up, but I don't take it. I ask who this Tokker guy is, and the cool gothic dude says "Tokker never hurt anyone."

So we then exit through a door into a large room with many beds. We had the general idea: Orgy. There's these to people there in business suits, one male, the other female, and they tell the rules of the orgy. Right.

Then there's this one dude. He's trying to force himself on this cool goth chick who is a close friend to me in the dream, so I stop him, and we fight each other in a flesh colored room with blood splattered on the walls, and we're knocking each other through walls and stuff.

Then I wake up.

Goths are cool.

A Damn Weird Dream

This dream was damn weird. My dad had kidnapped TJ Boyd's mom, who for some odd reason was a tater tot that was in a zig-zag shape, so when you push the two ends of her together, she formed a star. Unfortunately, my dad ate her, so when TJ paid the ransom all we could give him was some airline tickets.

As I write this, I think TJ's in Atlanta.

Untitled

This dream happened a while ago, so I don't remember much, but basically, I died. I found myself in my room, which was all in shades of black and white.

When you looked at the one wall, you saw the world of the living, which was in color. For some damn odd reason, it was the locker room at Edward Town Middle School. It was the boy's locker room. Fotunately, there were girls in it.

One girl got too close to my dead world, so I possessed her, and I think I killed someone or something bad, 'cause everyone got pissed at me and they knew I was possessing this girl, so I end up going back to my dead world and reading a comic.

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