051302

content

It was 2:30 a.m. on the monday morning after mother's day.  I had been at this incredibly 
boring family dinner for mother's day, but it didn't last too long.  The rest of my day 
had been boring.  The past few weeks had probably been some of the worst of my life.  
Currently without friends or anywhere to go or anything to do but sit at home, I was 
having one of the most painful nights ever.  I had spent the whole night online chatting 
with random people, trying to find a girl to maybe do something with in the next few days, 
but of course without success.  I finally came to the decision to go outside and have a 
smoke or two.  I walked outside and lit one up as the rain fell onto the black asphalt 
outside.  The fluorescent lights shone off the lot showing each droplet hitting the 
smalls puddles that had formed.  It had been raining all day and the plants and trees 
outside my apartment were glowing green.  I sat on the wooden steps leading up to my 
apartment and heard nothing but the rain on the ground and the occasional car drive by on 
the street.  Flicking my first cigarette, I promptly got out another one and fired it up, 
not wanting these moments to end.  This is because for whatever reason, sitting here 
watching the rain, I felt content.  I felt free even.  As I finished my last cigarette, I 
noticed a raccoon moving in and out of the shadows cast by the trees on the other side of 
the lot.  It stopped by one of the cars like it was checking for something, then it looked 
up towards me and I looked back, and then he went on his way without being disturbed by me.
I watched him finish crossing the lot and out of view, flicked my cigarette and went 
inside.  I slept better that night than I had in weeks.