Marvel's Bio: That's no earthquake, that's Avalanche! High-school senior Lance Alvers -- a snide, surly jerk -- can project waves of energy into the ground, producing all manner of seismic mayhem. Lance's powers are very taxing, and using them gives him headaches. Therefore, he can only employ his abilities on a limited basis before losing control of his potentially unlimited powers.

My Half-assed Bio: ...How dare they call Lanciepoo a "snide, surly jerk"?! Hmph! See? They know nothing. Bastards. >.< Moving along...

We first see Lance in X-Impulse -- and unfortunately, he's trying to get into Kitty's pants the entire time (Lancitty! Hissss!). He's being a good little boy and innocently spray-painting lockers red, when *surprise surprise* little Kitty Pryde comes phasing through her locker and knocks him over (the nerve!). So, with a big, red streak of paint smeared all over his face, he proceeds to attempt to woo the little Shadowcat (sort-of...). Yawn. I actually liked this the first few times I saw it, because it was like a hot, badass guy going after me in a way (disillusioned PB, I know) but the effect quickly lost its merit when I saw how stupidly the writers were going about creating the Lancittyness on the show >.<

During his career with the BoM, Lance has spent time: destroying things, yelling at people, breaking things, temporarily abandoning his teammates for the X-Dweebs, exploding things, making lame (but strangely endearing) rock puns while both in and out of battle, screwing Pietr-- um... hehe! One-track mind! :D He also drives around town in his stylin' forest-green Jeep Wrangler, a vehicle which, in real life, now causes sporadic, conpulsive giggling and squealing on my part. Oh, and my usual screeching of the line "It's Lance Alvers and his buddies!!" whenever I see one (which is quite often) and ...yeah. I can't believe I've never had an accident. Oh, the tragedy of the easily distracted. :D Whoa, like, waaaay off-topic, there O.o;; Back to Lance! Yay!

For whatever reason (most likely because he's the oldest) fanfic writers like to turn Lance into the mother hen of the group -- they see him as the one smacking everyone out of bed each morning for school, doing the shopping, keeping house, working to support the rest of their lazy asses >.> and... poor Lance! He's being turned into a woman! O.o;; The working part can be rationalized by his age, but the rest...? What 18-year-old boy is gonna do all that, huh? Really? Ahh, we fic writers have it bad, we do. ^^;;

"I Have An Opinion!!" -- Psycho B's Opinion: Mmm, rock-tumbly goodness! ^^ I love Lanciepoo! I'd love him even more if the moron writers would stop making him a wussy villain, buuut I still love him lots! :D Even if he's a big doofus sometimes. (HA! I'm bitching about their making him a wussy?! I wrote Bittersweet, for chrissakes! That's about as OOC as you can get! >.O) But yes, we all love him, whether we like to admit it or not. ::pets Lanciepoo::