We were so happy together,
with smiles, and kisses, and promises
Sure that this would last forever
Then one day, you left me
Without a warning or a clue
Found out you were with someone else,
I didnt know whut to do.
So instead or crying, instead of dying,
I took all your clothes and stuff,
Threw it into the firepit out back,
And with a match, I lit it up
As i watched the smoke
curl into the darkened sky,
I think of you,
But I do not cry.
I just destroy everything of yours,
Like you did to my heart.
Never want to see you again,
Now that our world has fallen apart.
(I wish to God that I was blind)
All the pain that I had felt
(I wish to God I couldn't feel)
All the blood you made me shed,
(Why did he always hit me?)
All but the death I wanted for myself.
Looking for someone to take it away,
(Oh God, make the pain go away)
Someone who can handle me...
(Why won't anyone talk about it?)
It's messed up, this intensity
Why won't the pain go away?
It's been almost a year, as of today
Blood, the screaming, the physical pain,
Humiliation, then I'm out in the rain,
Trying to get away
and see only black
So you turn around,
but you can't go back.
You close your eyes,
and you see a light,
Open them again,
And you realize it's night.
Trying to walk,
But you're legs won't move
You're hearing screams,
But they're coming from you.
You begin to fall,
Into a black hole,
But you never hit the ground,
You're losing your soul.
The walls are closing,
The roof is gone,
This is no illusion, child,
But your mind is gone
and I crumble inside each time,
Was there something that could have been done?
Now all I can do is cry
Imiss you enough to die myself,
It shouldn't have been this way
I know you were lookng for something else
but why is it you couldn't stay?
Always looking for California,
you're dreams were lined with gold,
your life would be better there,
You would never grown old
But for all your searching for paradise,
you found only the world, I know
Maybe there was something you missed
when you were flying down that road
I know surely you are happy now,
because you didn't stay
But you have no clue how much I miss you
and California seems so far away
Yet I know I will see you again,
When I get there, I'll find you somehow
Until then, I hope you found paradise,
I hope you're in California now
