[Enter Tracer and Spek in a dark, cold cave. Spek is busy jotting things down in a book while Tracer is fighting imaginary monsters with his sword.]
TRACER: Gee, Spek, you seem to be doing something awful important over there.
SPEK: Yes, Tracer, I am.
TRACER: Well, what is it?
SPEK: I am planning what we are going to do tonight, Tracer, so do try and be quiet.
TRACER: But what is it we are going to do?
SPEK: The same thing we do every night, Tracer...TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
[Enter Chorus, singing a song]
CHORUS: They're Fighter and the Mage,
Yes Fighter and the Mage.
One's an evil genius
The other has no brain,
They're Warriors of Light
They never miss a fight
They're sneaky
They're Fighter and the Mage, Mage, Mage, Mage,
Mage, Mage, Mage, Mage, Mage.

When their scheming is complete
The plot shall be unveiled,
Using scheming and deceit
Worldwide they shall be hailed!

They're Fighter and the Mage
Yes, Fighter and the Mage
Their corrupted, evil brains
Are quite easy to explain.
To prove their evil power
They'll take over in an hour
They're sneaky,
They're Fighter and the Mage, Mage, Mage, Mage
Mage, Mage, Mage, Mage, Yo! [Exit Chorus]

TRACER: Gee Spek, that was quite a catchy tune, wasn't it? Yo!
SPEK: Quiet you! Didn't you hear them? We only have an hour to take over the world!
TRACER: I know, Spek, but wouldn't you rather just stay home and play Bingo, or something?
SPEK: No, you imbecile! How could Bingo ever possibly replace a night of treachery and deceit?
TRACER: Its quite simple, really. You see, we just sit down over there and I read the numbers and you call out "BINGO!" when you have a row filled.
SPEK: Your stupidity is endless, Tracer. Can't you see that what I am planning is much more important than a game of Bingo?
TRACER: I dunno, Spek, Bingo is a really popular game these days. I mean, how many people do you hear about trying to take over the world?
SPEK: None, Tracer, which is exactly why I will be the first to gain dominion over the entire earth!
TRACER: But Spek, we already own this whole island. Isn't that enough?
SPEK: Tracer, I can walk around the entire island in two minutes. That is not what I call a powerful territory. Now go play with your sword over on that side of the island so I can finish scheming!
TRACER: Okay, yo! [Tracer walks to the other side of the cave and begins fighting imaginary hordes of Imps.]
SPEK: Now, if I carry the two, multiply by an evil factor of thirty-seven, divide by the stupidity factor...AH HA! Success! Tracer, come here!
TRACER: Yes, Spek?
SPEK: Behold! My greatest plan yet, Tracer! As everyone knows, the Imps multiply faster than jackrabbits. We brainwash the entire Impire, bending them to our evil will. They shall invade every major kingdom, causing mass hysteria. Then, when everyone thinks that it is all hopeless, we come along and drive away the Imps, causing kingdoms around the world to hail us as their saviors! As such, we are entitled to request a reward, and thus the reward we shall request will be none other than to control the world!
TRACER: Good idea, yo!
SPEK: Tracer, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
TRACER: I think so Spek, but jockstraps make me itch.
SPEK: Yeah, and I always get this strange rash that won't go away for weeks. But enough idle banter, let us make haste to visit the Imperor of the Impire!
[Exeunt]
[Tracer and Spek reappear in the middle of a forest, surrounded by a stronghold of treetop fortresses.]
SPEK: I guess that solves the problem of getting off the island.
TRACER: You mean you didn't do that, yo?
SPEK: No...I mean, yes, of course I have the power of translocation. Everyone should ph34r my l33t powers!
TRACER: Should do what with your what kind of powers?
SPEK: They should ph34r my l33t powers!
TRACER: What are those?
SPEK: Why do I even bother to bring you along, Tracer?
TRACER: Because I like swords because they are shiny!
SPEK: Point taken. I do kind of need you as a human shield.
TRACER: Yo!
[Enter a group of imps sitting around a campfire, several of them playing bongos as they do a horrible impression of the Ewok Song]
SPEK: Behold, Tracer, my latest creation. I call it the Hypno-Orb! All I need to do is just get to their Imperor and use this device on him, and then the entire Impire will be under my control! And then, once we control the Impire, we will take over the world! Are you thinking what I am thinking, Tracer?
TRACER: I think so, Spek, but why are the parking spots for the handicapped so close to the entrances of the building when the handicapped stalls are on the farthest end of the bathroom?
SPEK: No, you dolt! Tonight we shall finally succeed in TAKING OVER THE WORLD!
TRACER: Oh, that too. Then we can make the handicapped stalls right by the door, right Spek?
SPEK: No, you fool. We will move the handicapped parking spots to the FARTHEST part of the parking lot!
TRACER: Wouldn't that be a bit...evil, Spek?
SPEK: Yes, Tracer! I think you are finally beginning to understand!
[Enter True Omega behind Tracer and Spek. Spek is busy looking at the imps below, trying to find True Omega]
OMEGA: You mind if I borrow that for a minute?
TRACER: Sure, yo!
[Tracer hands the Hypno-Orb to True Omega]
SPEK: Now all we need to do is to sneak in and hypnotize their Imperor with this Hypno-Orb, and then VICTORY shall be ours.
TRACER: Yo! Where is the orb?
SPEK: You are supposed to be carrying it.
TRACER: Oh, well, what does an orb look like?
SPEK: Grrr....why I outta blast you into oblivion!
OMEGA: Not into Sweet Oblivion, I hope?
SPEK: Yes, Tracer, you shall be sent into Sweet Oblivion!
TRACER: Umm...Spek?
SPEK: Quiet you, I am preparing to blast you into Sweet Oblivion! Can't you see that?
TRACER: But...
SPEK: I SAID SILENCE! Now, hand over the Hypno-Orb so I can finish taking over the world!
TRACER: But I...
SPEK: DON'T ARGUE! JUST GIVE IT TO ME!
OMEGA: He doesn't have it. I do.
SPEK: Of course you have it, Tracer. Now give...it...to...me...wait a minute, you're not supposed to be here.
OMEGA: Of course I am. All of your plans must fail, and it just so happens that this time I am the one who shall foil your evil scheme.
SPEK: But I want to take over the world.
OMEGA: As do I, therefore I must stop you!
SPEK: Oh yeah? Eat Bolt 3 mutha fugga!
OMEGA: With your stolen Bolt 3 Spell?
SPEK: Dammit!
[True Omega uses the Hypno-Orb on Spek and Tracer]
OMEGA: You shall do as I say! You will cluck like a chicken.
[Spek and Tracer begin to cluck like chickens.]
OMEGA: You will do the Macarena!
[Spek and Tracer do the Macarena]
OMEGA: You will now turn into lab mice and forever be known as Pinky and the Brain. You shall now have to try and take over the world as mice!
[Spek and Tracer become Pinky and the Brain.]
SPEK: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! World Conquest is now beyond my grasp!
[Spek wakes up to find himself asleep in Corneria, still his old self. His companions are already getting ready to leave.]
SPEK: Dammit, I overslept again!
[Exeunt]