Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions Oh lets go back to the start Running in circles, coming up tails Heads on a silence apart �Hotaru,� he uttered in agony, �I�m sorry, Hotaru - so sorry.� He rolled onto his back and his chest rose and fell in gasping, desperate breaths. Weak, pale hands dug at nothingness as he tried to keep from loosing consciousness. His chest felt tight and trodden, as if it were holding a great weight; it was holding his sadness, his guilt, and his fate. Shutting his eyelids tightly, he felt hot, wet tears on his stiff, cold face. He still felt alive. Again, he lifted himself up on his elbows, rolled over, and worked his way towards the image in the haze. Though his body faltered, his eyes did not; they never lost sight of the figure, they never forgot who it was. He had forgotten her in the past, he knew. He had forgotten her, his wife, his life�s purpose. He had let himself be blinded by circumstance and had fallen into darkness, and now he was paying for it with his life. But he couldn�t leave just yet, not without seeing her face one more time. Nobody said it was easy Oh it�s such a shame for us to part Nobody said it was easy No one ever said that it would be this hard Oh take me back to the start He searched his memory for the moment that he had lost control. He couldn�t place it, but at some point he had fallen astray, and some point he had gotten this idea, this insane idea... when did it happen? �When did it happen?� he cried out, dragging his numbing body through the mist, �When did I lose you, Hotaru? When did we loose each other?� His breathless sobs fell through his clenched teeth, his mind coiled with questions unanswered. He remembered the explosion in the lab, the body of his wife charred and black, with a scream of death burnt onto her skinless face. Her corpse he found wrapped protectively around their child, and she was alive. She was breathing, and if he did not act, he would lose her too. But he could save her, with all that he had learned, with all the research he had done after being banned from the mainstream scientific community, he could use his powers of science to sustain her, make her live again. He would show them all. He would save her. I was just guessing at numbers and figures Pulling your puzzles apart Questions of science, science and progress Do not speak as loud as my heart �I did what I could, Hotaru! I did what I thought was best,� he finally succumbed to his exhaustion, dropping his tear streaked face to the floor, �for both of us...� He reached towards the shadow in the fog, his finger tips tracing her form, so small and fragile - he only wanted to hold her once more, to protect her as he could not before, as he did not when he should have. As he suffered in shame, the image continued to fade into the distance, away, away from him. �Don�t leave me here,� he gasped, dropping his arm, and arching his back with one last attempt to rise, �Don�t...� he chocked on his tears - he coughed blood, �don�t leave me alone... to die. Alone! I left you alone!� His eyes closed, the universe pitched and whirled; he lost track of sound, space; he lost his grasp on reality, and as he slipped into darkness he begged for forgiveness, begged for another chance, a chance to start over, to begin again. As a heavy sigh escaped from his tormented soul, his body relaxed. The scientist lay alone in death, in sorrow, and eternal torment, forever kept from that which he could never truly save. Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me Oh and I rush to the start Running in circles, chasing our tails Coming back as we are Nobody said it was easy Oh it�s such a shame for us to part Nobody said it was easy No one ever said it would be so hard I�m going back to the start ------------------------------------- Did you like it? ^^;; Send all comments to Sakura@sailorastera.com!
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