Pete and Tim's page for Jerks and their Mothers

Dear Pete and also Tim,

My husband sleeps in his underware. He wears the long woolen kind, and he sleeps in the same underwear he's worn all day. The problem is getting him to change it. Pete and Tim, there are four sets of clean underware in his drawer, but he won't put on a clean pair without a fight. I can't even get the underwear away from him to put in the wash. Don't tell me to grab it when he is in the bathtub. He doesn't bathe much either. Please help me. He's getting pretty ripe.

Wife of Stinky.


Dear You... Yeah you. Who else would it be?

I'm speachless. Really. Your husband has become my new hero. I respect him more than my father.

I love social disobedience of any kind.. It's the only good thing that Ralph Waldo ever came up with. But it is my resposibility to help you so I will try.

What you could do is take up smoking... in bed. Let me explain. It is a known fact that humans produce a large amount of, what scientists call, Methane Gas (Farts to the lay person). Methane is a flamable gas that comes out of your poo hole. Anyway, I am sure that your husband's underwear are just smeared with all sorts of methane. So, while you are smoking maybe allow some of your ashes to fall onto his underwear... I bet he'll change in a hurry after that.

Or you could just protest his not changing his underwear outside your house. Maybe you could organize a group of your friends and get a big group out there, with signs and everything. Might I suggest chanting, "Stinky pants, Stinky pants... Killing all my plants!" "Icky, Sticky, Your underwear is reaky!" or "You smell! You stink! I hate you! Let's get a divorce!"

Or you could just take a look at this page.

Love Pete and Tim.

PS. Tell your husband I said hi.