Pete and Tim's Page for Jerks and their Mothers

Dear Pete and also Tim:
My husband hit our 8-year-old son hard enought to make him cry because the boy had reached up to get something from a shelf and accidentally knocked off a beer mug my husband had been given in college. The mug broke when it landed on the tile floor. Our son was crushed by what happened - not only by what he'd done, but also by his fathers reaction. He's always had a good relationship with his dad, and I think his father overreacted and should apologize. He doesn't want to do this because he feels it would weaken him in his son's eyes.
With love -- F.P.

Dear Stupid.

Thank you so much for your letter. We would be so happy to take a little time out of our lives to help you with your petty, insignificant problem.

Pete feels that before we can help you we must inform you that your letter bored us. We really only read the first sentence. And we hated it! It should read, 'My husband kicked my son's ass so bad that I can't even kiss him goodnight anymore because his crushed face makes me sick.' You gotta grab our attention.

I also feel that the letter wasn't sexy enough. People, I can't say this enough, if you want us to read your letters make 'em sexy!

Anyway, what you need to do is deal. Your husband punished your son for his clumsiness. Punishment is supposed to make you cry, stupid! If your son hadn't cried after your husband punished him I'd conclude that your husband was a wuss.

So, Stupid, get over it. Your son did, I'm sure.

With Love
Pete and Tim.

P.S. Don't forget that we hate you, and your klutsy son.