Hello, my name is Professor Sergio Jenkins. I was born in Havannah. I was the love child of Dracula and Latin singing, dancing, and acting sensation Jennifer Lopez. Soon after my birth, my parents deserted me in a dried creek bed. I spent the next seventeen years in that creek. I spent most of the time hunting with my turtle friend Henry. Henry was part of an activist group called The Black Jihad. In the Black Jihad I met a beautiful, charming, well endowed girl named Amber. We became close. She was a college student majoring in animal husbandry. It was a field I was interested in. So, I recycled Amber and stole her identity. Using her identity I soon received a Masters degree in Animal Husbandry. This is when I began my battle with PCP*. Then one night at a party, I passed out, woke up, and I was Sergio Jenkins, low frequency sound generator operator. The rest is history.

*People's Court Penalties