G - spot

 

The G spot. Here you'll learn what it is, where it is, and what to do with it. The technique takes only minutes to learn but you may need a few tries for it to work.

 

The G spot is a zone about two or three inches inside the vagina on the front wall, closest to the clitoris or pubic bone. With the right technique and a bit of practice it can yield lots and lots of pleasure for women including orgasm, multiple orgasms and female ejaculation.
Where exactly is the G spot? Its the red spot in the diagram below:

 

 

 

This page aims to help both women and men, but for simplicity 'you' refers to the female partner and 'he' or 'him' refers to the male partner. It's best if both partners read this page. Here's the technique:

1. Discuss beforehand with your partner what you're going to do.
2. Make sure your guy's nails are clean and trimmed short.
3. LOTS and LOTS of foreplay (minimum 30 minutes, preferably an hour).
4. Lie on your back and pull your knees up. It also helps to place a pillow or two under your hips.
5. Your partner lies between your legs. Ask him to gently place his fingers two or three inches inside your vagina.
6. He then makes a "come here" motion with his fingers.
7. His fingers are now on your G spot. He massages back and forth with his fingers, gently at first, then harder, eventually using lots of pressure.
8. That's it! With luck you'll reach your first orgasm within 3 to 5 minutes of hard massaging. It has to be hard - the clit needs a light touch, the G spot needs much heavier pressure.

The G spot itself feels like a very subtle bump 2 or 3 inches inside your vagina, about 1 to 2 inches in diameter. When he hits it right you'll know!
The important things are foreplay, bringing your knees up to your chest, and hard pressure on your G spot. Hard pressure on the G spot is vital since it doesn't respond to light rubbing or stroking, only heavy, deep massaging.
Foreplay builds your sexual excitement and fills your vaginal and clitoral areas with blood - the equivalent of a man getting an erection. Lots of foreplay makes any sexual touch much more pleasurable. If you go straight to G spot massage with no foreplay it won't work! Check our foreplay page for ideas.
By the way, the G in G spot stands for Gräfenberg, after the German doctor who discovered it in the 1950s. Now you know.

 

Letting go of that pee feeling

The most common barrier to reaching a G spot orgasm is the 'pee feeling'. Sometimes during G spot massage you'll get this feeling and you might want to stop straight away. Here's some tips to get around this (if you're male make sure to explain all this to your partner beforehand):
First, go to the bathroom and empty your bladder. When you start the G spot massage, you might get the pee feeling. But no urine will come out because you've just emptied her bladder, and the tube leading from the bladder (the urethra) is blocked off during orgasm.
Urine will only come out if you have very weak pelvic floor muscles, which is unlikely for most women.
What's happening is the build up to a female ejaculation. This is a clear or white substance similar to male semen that may shoot out from your urethral opening during orgasm. The ejaculation doesn't come from the bladder. It comes from the paraurethral glands, a collection of small glands parallel to or surrounding the urethra.
Female ejaculation is usually very, very pleasurable, and is most likely to happen during G spot massage. So put a towel or two down underneath you, and talk to your partner about it beforehand.

The way to get over the 'pee feeling' barrier is to just let go. You get this feeling because the Para-urethral glands are beginning to fill the urethra with ejaculate. If this is a new sensation you'll probably think you're going to pee. The way to get over it is to actually let your body pee. But no pee will come out! Just let the tension build up and let the feeling go. If you can get over the pee feeling, there's a good chance you'll reach orgasm from G spot massage, and possibly multiple orgasm.
Before you start any of this, discuss it with your partner, especially about the possibility of an ejaculation. Guys, tell your partner you don't mind getting wet if she ejaculates, in fact, you'd find it very, very nice indeed. Girls if you're holding back because you don't want to wet him, just let it go! Most guys find this highly arousing. Put down a towel first in case.

Female ejaculation doesn't have the smell, taste or look of urine. However since it's a bodily fluid you should be as careful with it as you would with any other bodily fluid: semen, blood etc - i.e., don't ingest it or let it get into any open cuts on your body.

Again go to the bathroom to urinate before you do this and try to get over the pee feeling if you gets it. Don't give up easily - the more you try the more chance there is you'll enjoy it.

 

G spot orgasm

With practice and some luck, G spot massage will produce an orgasm. If you come its nice to tell your partner what's just happened. This way he'll know he's got the right technique. There is a way for him to 'feel' the orgasm happening - if keeps his finger or thumb inside your vagina (he should keep massaging your G spot anyway), he can feel the orgasmic contractions. This will be a light, rhythmical squeezing of the vagina, lasting about 5 to 10 seconds. There are many other signs accompanying orgasm: moaning, flushing of skin, muscle tension, and so on, but the vaginal contractions are the best way to tell if an orgasm is happening (apart from the woman actually saying it). Its also a great psychological boost for a guy to feel the contractions of an orgasm around his thumb or finger.

 

Multiple G spot Orgasm

If you keep going after the first orgasm, its possible to reach a second, third or more. Clitoral stimulation can produce multiple orgasms, but the most common way is G spot massage. If you reach the first orgasm from G spot massage, ask your partner to keep going until he feels the orgasmic contractions finish. It should last about 5 to 10 seconds. After the orgasm is over you might want to ask him to stop for about 20 seconds. Many women find stimulation at this point uncomfortable. He can start again with hard G spot massaging after this point.
If you keep going like this you may reach a second, third or tenth orgasm. Leave the 20 second pause after each one, but only after the orgasmic contractions are over - don't stop during the orgasm! Again remember to press hard on the G spot - light rubbing won't do anything.

 

Talking during foreplay

There's lots of things you can do to spice it up during foreplay. One is to describe in intimate detail what you want your partner to do, or if you're the male partner you can describe what you're going to do. Talk about feelings, pleasures, actions, describe orgasm if you want. Describe the foreplay actions as well as the sex actions. Say stuff like "Imagine you feel the tension building up inside you, getting nicer and nicer. My hands are all over you, massaging everywhere. Then slowly I run my hands around your thighs, in between your legs" etc etc. Keep going like this, describing the whole experience before you start any of it. Just hold each other and kiss while you're talking about it. You can keep going right up to "and then you let everything go and you feel your body exploding in pleasure, waves of orgasmic delight crashing through your whole being. Now imagine having this feeling over and over again." etc etc. Use your imagination! Its kind of talking dirty mixed with visualisation.
If you are having difficulty getting over the pee feeling, you can foreplay-talk about letting go and getting over it.
Also try this foreplay-talk together somewhere that's not your bedroom, in a club, in public, then go home and act out the ideas you came up with. Or do it over the phone or internet chat. Build up is everything!

 

If it doesn't work

If you still have trouble getting pleasure from G spot massage and have tried everything above, we suggest clitoral stimulation. Though G spot play is generally considered more likely to produce multiple orgasm and female ejaculation, clit play works for a higher percentage of women (in the region of 90-95%, although don't quote us on that). Clit sex still yields lots and lots and lots of pleasure for women - highly recommended. Then try G spot and clit together - with your partner's thumb on your G spot, he can use the fingers from the same hand to stroke your clit, or he can use his other hand to play with your clit. Whatever works for you... pleasure is paramount.