The Olsens twins have become a brand name. This just gives me another reason to dislike them. If you know me, you know I hate brand names, especially American Eagle and such, for trying to make every person dress alike, and the Olsen twins are now doing the same. Their line is geared for preteens(I told you ten year olds liked them)But their brand, it doesn't just stay with clothes. Oh, no. The Olsens are too good to do just fashion, so instead, they do cosmetics, books and magazines, games, dolls, and even bedsheets. They're just trying to make more money. Firstly, they don't even wear their own line, and that's understandable because they aren't preteens, however, the clothes they wear are nothing like the clothes they sell. Secondly, they don't write their own books, which probably is something to be thankful for because their writing skills are probably worse than their acting skills, but their books are based on their old tv shows, and they suck. Two of a Kind has been canceled for how long now? But they're still making books about that stupid stupid show. Their magazine costs 9 dollars. 9 dollars for a magazine. Sorry we all don't get 10 000 000 pay checks like you guys do, but how many girls have that much money to spend on a magazine that just tells you what kind of music they like and what kind of clothes they wear(not from their fashion line). Now, what is up with their dolls? Why would you buy two of the exact same looking doll. They're only wearing different clothes, other than that they look exactly alike. Why would you buy something like that? And now, they're expanding their clothing line for guys!!! That just makes me laugh. I can see guys wearing pinkish pants and light blue shirts with hearts all over them. I wonder how much money they'll make off of that? LOL.

Here's the summary of Our Lips are Sealed, with my comments of course.
Follow Mary-Kate and Ashley halfway around the world Why would anyone want to follow the Olsens anywhere? in this Aussie I bet you think you're cool now, don't you?adventure, The Olsens idea of an adventure: Ashley, the line for lip-glosses is just too long! I have an idea. Let's try to use our fame for a discount. jam-packed with non-stop action, like the action of the Olsens flipping open their lip gloss and opening it again? super spies,They aren't super spies...their faces are plastered everywhere. Anyone can reconize them. If they're super spies, then my name is Bond, James Bond and surfer guys Now there's a surprise. I never would have expected cute guys in an Olsen movie The escapade oooh, a big fancy word...I wonder what it means begins when the girls witness a jewel theft are you sure it wasn't them stealing the jewels? and have to go into the F.B.I Witness Protection Program Hurry,Olsens, call your strong and mighty, body guards to save you...did I mention cute? Unfortunatley, not even the F.B.I. can save them from their own blabbermouths as they blow their own cover in town after town, do you see how stupid they are?until there's only one place left-Australia.What's wrong with Antartica? Or did they already blow their cover there too, by telling the penguins?

Mary-Kate and Ashley in Action:
Limos,Ashley wants her limo to be pink) Movie Premieres, (but not their own, because their movies never even go to the movie theater....they always go to movie premieres that they weren't even in Saving the World if it's up to the Olsens to save the world, our world has major, major problems just another day in the lives of Mary-Kate and Ashley, Teenage Superstars yes, superstars...oh wait, to be a superstar, people actually have to like you who play Teenage Special Agents in their weekly mini-moviesby mini-movies, you mean tv shows, right?. This show wait, I thought they were mini-movies gives the viewer something extraordinary Mary-Kate and Ashley putting on lip gloss?....We get to see two of the biggest teen stars in the world commenting I bet it would sound like this "like, oh my goodness" *twirls hair*) on their "film" adventures sounds really extraoridinary and then, with the power of animation, I just can't wait we join them we who? You see what happens when the Olsens get seperated? They start talking to themselves-- at the premiere but not of their own movies of course -- to watch their on-screen Super Teen Agent identities fight the good fight I'm going to kill you with my lip-gloss....BAAMM...Oh no! Mary-Kate, it's not working! They aren't dead! What will I do now? and save the world from evil. These girls go right from the pre-show interview in real life What's real life Ashley? I don't know Mary-Kate. I don't think we've ever had one of those. straight to exotic locations like the Great Wall of China yes, sounds really exotic as animated Special Agents. I'm still waiting for them to go to Antartica....when will they leave?
So Little Time:
Mary-Kate and Ashley play teenage girls,What were you expecting them to play?Adults? Riley and Chloe Carlson,The same people from Winning London...how creative in their new television series So Little Time on ABC Family. Last time I checked, SLT was playing on Fox Riley and Chloe have the everyday problems Ashley, what should I wear???I just can't decide. What kind of lip gloss should I wear?? teenage girls face If Mary-Kate and Ashley had to face any kind of problems like any normal teenager, I think they would die...not everything's a soap opera, on top of dealing with two very different parentsThat sounds like a really hard problem, considering their parents don't even live together. Their mom, Macy Carlson, lives in a dream beach house in Malibu, California like the house the Olsens live in usually and has a glamour job as a high fashion designer and very successful executive. Oooh....how perfect Their dad, Jake Carlson, has decided to "find himself"The Olsens should find themselves as well...except skip the finding part and stay lost and move his new home on wheels Sounds super cool, dude--a tiny trailer--right next door. So different, but they still have their two daughters who are exactly the same in common and the love they have for them Whoa...did I just hear someone say that they loved the Olsens?. Somehow this makes the family functional in its own peculiar way that describes the Olsens. Peculiar Add a Latino housekeeper to the mix, who, by the way, is played by an American with a very crappy accent an over the top friend who is obessed with Riley,You know, it's kinda funny how in their movies, the Olsens are always at the centre of attention. and a beautiful exotic fashion model friend, and you've got a hilarious recipe!What were we cooking?
Why do they have a stylist living with them if they go out wearing things like this???? Ashley's wearing sandals, Mary-Kate is wearing big snow boots. I mean, I know it gets cold in Canada, but aren't you overdoing it, just a little? They don't even match her skirt. Ashley's shorts are just hideous, but she is too occupied because she's talking to.....her imaginary friends, possibly? Mary-Kate's sweater is ugly. Her hair is messed up, too. Their bodyguard is behind them. I wonder how he got hired, because he, like, isn't even, like, cute..Heehee.
In a interview with the Olsens, they were asked what three things they would bring with them on a desert island.
Mary-Kate said: Lip gloss, music and water. I told you they were dumb. Lip gloss? There are no guys on a desert island, so you have no reason at all to look pretty(considering you already don't). Get over yourself. Music...alright there, Mary-Kate....how the heck do you think you're going to plug in your music? And if you run it on batteries, your batteries will run out. I think you need food to survive as well. But it's just as well that you don't. And, dude, don't bring water with you to an island. It's an island! You're surrounded by water. Moron.
Ashley said: Lip gloss, music and my cell phone. Just when you think the Olsens can't get any stupider, along comes Ashley. Are you completly stupid? First of all, who are you gonna phone? Your friends that you don't have? Or the director of your latest movie? You think you're gonna be able to get service out there? Suuuure you will.
Did you know that Ashley has a pony named CD (for Compact Disc) and a horse named Star? We all know that the Olsens love music and everything, but what was she thinking???Compact Disc? Come on.
Did you know that their designer, Judy, lives with them?What the heck? Why???Does she pick exactly what they wear every morning to school? I would sue her, cuz she's doing a horrible job.
I've just finished reading the September issue of YM magazine, and I am shocked that such a cool magazine like YM would put two totally uncool girls, like the Olsens on their cover. Of course, they had to, because the readers got to vote on who they wanted on the cover. And look it who won. It makes me sick. Anyways, I was reading it, and it wasn't really all that bad. Almost enough to make me like them.....almost. But not quite. It's actually quite sickening how they have never been apart, and don't ever plan on it. Basically, in the whole interview, Mary-Kate did ALL the talking. Ashley inserted a sentence here and there. I'm beginning to think that Ashley has no say at all in anything the Olsens put their name on. And it's probably true. Anyways, YM did a good job on the article, but the only thing was, it was on the Olsens.
I know that some people do not agree with me on the topic of the Olsen twins. If you really hate this part of my site this much, send me hatemail. It would make my day. Really. Then I can make fun of you. My e-mail is [email protected] and make sure you put something in the subject line. And might I just add that I am in no way jealous of the Olsen twins, and if this site has given you the impression that I am jealous of you or the Olsens, in any way then I suggest you seek help.
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws

1