Your Adored One Chapter 6

A/N 

Warning:  Grissom and another women…the woman that Heather sent.

This was tough to write and it’s probably tougher to read.  Feel free to bitch at me if you want.  I have made the review process as easy as possible so give it a whirl.  Please.  This is a very complex relationship in very complex circumstances.  It’s all going to work out in the end.

Present

Sara.  That was her name.  He had uttered the word twice.  Once when he had entered her and again when he had climaxed.  She doubted it had been a slip.  He needed to believe that Sara was there if only for a few minutes. Another time he had grunted something Asian sounding.  A pet name.  Of course Sara deserved a pet name. 

Jacqueline had thought he would take her to his bedroom.  Instead he had screwed her on a pull out sofa in his office.   The bedroom was Sara’s room.  Jacqueline felt the unfamiliar tug of jealousy.  Who was vixen Sara that left her fingerprint on the heart Gil Grissom that even after she left the quiet handsome man would not sully the space she had occupied?

Heather had been wrong.  He had not tied her.  Instead he insisted that she put her hands over her head with the wrists crossed.  Only Sara was worth the time and effort actual bondage required.  He was not was not one of those clients that needed to hold her when the act was over.  Sara’s territory.   He knew about love and this wasn’t it.  Sara was love.  Jacqueline was convenience.  Not even comfort.    He had not seen her across a room and asked her price.  She was not alluring beauty that he longed to possess if only for a few moments.

He would be surprised to learn that Jacqueline actually owned both his books.  They had been required reading for her graduate level entomology class.  Required, that was a laugh.  Gil Grissom had written the entomological old and new testaments.  She had thought he looked kind and cocky as his clear eyes smiled from the back of the most recent dust jacket.  She’d seen him with Heather once, just the back of him as they had disappeared into a restaurant.  Her opinion had not changed as she watched him pull out a chair for her boss.

Even after tonight her opinion had not changed, only been enhanced with his complexities.  Kind, Cocky, not arrogant but cocky.  Brilliant.  Hurting. 

He was fully dressed now, his back to her as his eyes cast about the dark backyard.  His carriage was straight and solid as he sipped something amber. Jacqueline wondered if he had planted flowers for Sara.  Were roses set to bloom in the spring?  Sara’s roses.  Sara’s man.  Sara’s life. 

“Fuck Sara.  You hear me Sara.  You with your degrees and the love of your life.”

Jacqueline was sure the other woman had finished college, probably had some graduate degree.  Probably some nice wholesome family that footed the bill or maybe she was so smart that she’d gotten a scholarship. 

Jacqueline’s mother died when she was sixteen.  Instead of disappearing into the system, she had struggled for emancipation, gotten a job at a fast food restaurant where she ultimately became manager.   She earned her GED and took advantage of the chain’s tuition benefits when she enrolled in a local two-year college.

Her grades had started out as average. They had always been mediocre.  She knew she was smart.  Her particular brand of intelligence didn’t rise to the top in academic settings.  Then she met Jason. He was her chemistry professor and was stunned to realize just how well-read Jacqueline was, that she perfectly remembered the periodic table from tenth grade, that she did long division with no calculator.   He was the one that made her get tested for the learning disability.  He said he was leaving his wife for her.  She still believed he’d meant it.  His promise fell apart when Bobbie, the wife, was diagnosed with breast cancer.  She never saw him again after graduation though he tried to contact her time and time again. 

After that, she had started course work at a local university.  There had been another professor who was blinded by her brilliance and emerald green eyes.  Sam had taken her to Heather’s.  It was one of the best things he had done for her, second only to his insistence that she go to graduate school.  Every now and then money appeared for her in her bank account.  He had promised it would.  He never tried to contact her.  She knew he wouldn’t.

Gil tapped his cigarette lightly into an empty glass.

“Sara is going to be so pissed when she comes back and you have smoked up her house.”

He turned and looked her full on. 

Shit. Shit. Shit.  Fuck his damn sexy ass. She wanted to laugh at that.  She had fucked him.  Not really.  He had fucked her.  No that wasn’t it either.  She had been more like that ashtray with him dumping his ashes into her.

He gave a lopsided, genuinely, surprised grin.  “It’s not Sara’s house and she’s not coming back.”

Bitch.  She could not explain why she felt such visceral resentment for a woman she hoped never to meet.  Other clients, men who did not know themselves, minimized wives and girlfriends.  They did not want to speak of them, entered the fantasy world to forget them.  Gil Grissom entered the fantasy world to remember.  

“Probably should try convincing yourself of that.”  She wisecracked. 

The phone range and he picked it up without turning from the window.  Sara.  No he wasn’t asleep. Yes he would meet her there.  Tell Greg not to touch anything else.  Hadn’t they seen the beetles before now? He’d be there as soon as he could.  No, he wasn’t asleep. He was fine.  How was she?  Good.  He missed her.  She missed him.  There was nothing to be done about it now.   

She scribbled a note.

Probably should wash your hands too.    Eat some peanuts, and some celery, take a shower. Not sure which one gets rid of the smell of booze the best.  If she finds out you are smoking and drinking, she will know just how bad off you are. Keep your game face on.   See you next time Doc.  Maybe.

J.

Jacqueline slipped from the room hoping she never saw Gil Grissom again.

*******

Sara watched him grimace as he straightened to his full height.  He had been awake when he should have been sleep.  It troubled her. There were only two reasons Gil Grissom did not sleep .  Sex and worry.  There were no cases to keep him up.  Maybe he was jacking off.  Plausible. 

Still she was concerned about him.  If he had found someone else it pissed her off and pleased her at the same time.  It meant he had moved on. 

Catherine said something about lower lumbar strain and how she thought he was doing better.  She asked about his yoga and the special mattress he had bought.

“I am not taking a Yoga class.  There are just certain things this body was not designed to do. Not even for you.”

“It will help your back.  It’s a class for men.  Please Otto.  Please.”

Whatever she wanted.

“For a mattress? God woman, is it going to fuck me too?”

She had smiled that sweet smile then.  “No, it won’t, but I will.”

“At least you would be worth it.”  He took the brochure from her.

Eyelashes.  Long sexy eyelashes.

Whatever.

Sara’s mind clamped around the idea that he wasn’t sleeping in his own bed.  Guilt turned her from him.

********

Later they stood by his truck; hidden by the tinted windows she studied him. 

“You weren’t sleeping.”

He handed her two evidence vouchers along with the two beetles he had trapped in separate glass vials. 

Sara signed the slips and waited for him to answer as she placed everything into a larger envelope.

“I appreciate your concern Sara, but I don’t think we should get into this.  I mean…”  His voice was gravely and weary. Too late he realized his misstep.  He had just given himself away.  Two days before he would have been overjoyed that Sara was concerned about him.   Now he was evading responding to her statement.  She knew something was off. 

She smiled slightly.  Yeah, he was okay.   That was good.  She looked at her feet and nearly jumped when she felt his nicotine scented hand touch her face.  She took a step back and immediately regretted the hurt she had created in his eyes. 

He dropped his hands and stuffed them in his pockets.  She didn’t want him to touch her. 

“Are you doing okay Sara?” 

She nodded hoping he did not bring up Tim Speedle.

“I'm doing okay.”

“Just okay?”  He needed to regain some of his emotional footing. 

She nodded.  “For now.  It will get better.”

“Speed’s a nice guy.”  He said bravely. I hope I didn’t mess anything up for you guys.”

“You didn’t.” she replied easily. 

“Good.  I just want you to be happy.”

“Thanks” She turned and went back to the crime scene as she tried to remember why she had left him.

TBC