a hot woman is like a tea bag u dont know how hot she is until u put her in hot water!
so many men so few can afford me!
coffee,chocolate,men some things are just better rich
dont treat me any differently than u would treat a queen
warning-i have an attitude and i know how to use it
ofcourse i dont look busy i did it the right way the first time
dont start with me u will not win
if u want breakfast in bed sleep in the kitchen
why do men become smarter during sex!b/c they are plugged into a genious
why dont women blink during foreplay-they dont have enough time
why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg-they dont stop to ask directions
why did god put men on earth-b/c a vibrator cant mow the lawn
why dont women have mens brains-b/c they dont have penises to put them in
what do electric trains and breasts have in common-there intended for children but men usually play with them
why do men masterbate-its sex with someone they love
why did god make men b4 woman-u need a rough draft b4 they make the final copy
1.dogs dont have problems expressing affection in public
2.dogs miss u when u are gone
3.u never wonder whether your dog is good enough for u
4.dogs dont criticize your friends
5.dogs are very direct about wanting to go out
6.dogs dont play mind games with you
7.dogs dont feel threatened by your intelligence
8.u can train your dog to get your newspaper
9.dogs are easy to buy for
10.u never are suspicious of your dogs dreams
11.gorgeous dogs dont know they are gorgeous
12.dogs understand what no means
13.dogs dont need therapy to deal with their problems
14.dogs are happy with whatever u feed them
15.u can force a dog to take a bath
16.old dogs dont feel the need to leave u for a younger owner
17.dogs dont need to borrow things
18.dogs dont wiegh down your purse with their stuff
19.dogs dont play video games
20.dogs dont drink beer or watch football
placements-they only show up when there is food on the table
mascara-they usually run at the first sign of emotion
bike helmets-there good in emergencies but usually just look silly
government bonds-they take so long to mature
copiers-u need them in reproduction but thats about it
lava lamps-fun to look at it but not all that bright
bank accounts-without alot of money they dont generate alot of interest
high heels-they are easy to walk on once u get the hang of it
curling irons-always hot and always in your hair
mini skirts-if your not careful they will creep up your legs
hand guns--keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it
one old love she can imagine going back to and one who reminds her how far she has come
enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or need
something perfect to wear if the employerer or date of her dreams wants to see her in a hour
a youth shes content to leave behind
a past juicy enough that shes loking forward to telling it in her old age
a set of screwdrivers,a cordless drill and a black lace bra
one friend who always makes her laugh and one who lets her cry
a good piece of funiture not previously owned by anyone else in her family
8 matching plates,wine glasses with stems,and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored
a feeling of control over her destiny
how to fall in love without losing herserlf
how to quit a job
break up with a lover
and confront a friend without ruining the friendship
when to try harder and when to walk away
that her childhod may not have been perfect but its over
what she would and wouldnt do for love or more
how to live alone even if she doesnt like it
whom she cant trust