| Preston: Stephen Talley... How do you feel about the "Talley Fan Website"? Talley: It should be burned at the stake! Preston: Just how famous has the Talley Fan Site made you? Are you recognized on the street? Talley: Very very rarely Preston: Do you like cheese? Talley: Yes, except for that god damned processed crap! Preston: What kind of cheese do you like? Talley: Parmesan, Swiss, Cheddar, Monterey, everything except for that god damned precessed crap! Preston: Ok... If you were a dairy product, what kind would you be and why? Talley: Ha ha ha ha... That's bad... Ha ha... Preston: Come on, answer it. Talley: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuumm... I'm trying to think of what you couldn't twist... ...Ice cream. Preston: What kind of ice cream? Talley: Vanilla Logan: You've got to answer the why part. Preston: Oh yeah, why? Talley: I don't want to answer why. Preston: Come on, you have to. Talley: No I don't Preston: Alright fine, you don't have to. Preston: Ok... Cows are cool huh? Talley: Yeah, cows are cool. Preston: Ok, regarding some of the pictures on the Talley Fan Site, is it true that you have the ability to morph into the form of an animal and back to a human? Talley: I'm going to have to kill you now! Logan: HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE Preston: Have you ever eaten paper and if so did you enjoy it's flavor? Talley: NO! Logan: Oh, I did! Preston: You did!?! Logan: In Ms. Eaton's room, she had a stack of it. Preston: Ok... Tell me about your trips to Samoa. Talley: ...That's classified. Preston: No it's not! Talley: Yes it is! Talley: Ok, too much talking involved. Preston: Alright, uuuuuu... So, what do you think of Logan Jones? Talley: KILL HIM! SHOOT HIM! Logan: HA HA HA HA HA Preston: HA HA HA HA HA HA Talley: He's on my hate list right up there with the Backstreet Boys and the pizza delivery guy. Preston: HA HA HA HA HA Logan: HA HA HA HA HA Alexander: Why the pizza delivery guy? Talley: He delivered pizza late one time and I was very hungry. Preston: Do you ever eat butter all by itself? Talley: No, at least not since I was three. Preston: Ok, what's your favorite song? Talley: "Trash" by Korn. Preston: Can you tell of something the song reminds you of? Talley: Well, in that case, I also like "Break", that's another one of my favorites, that one reminds me of what I would like to do to my sister. Preston: HA HA HA Logan: HE HE HE Preston: Did you really kill the Easter Bunny? Talley: yes, but sadly it wasn't really Logan. Preston: Why did you kill the Easter Bunny?!?!?! Talley: Because I felt like it. Preston: Why?!? Talley: Because it was anger managment, My counselor said I should do that. Preston: Ok...Whatever! Preston: Do you hate Logan? Talley: Define hate. Preston: OK...uuuuh...loathing...wishing harm to be brought upon him. Talley: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Preston: Guts are cool eh? Talley: Depends on whose guts they are. Preston: Does the Talley Fan Site make you angry... Talley: Yes! Preston: ...or do you ever get, like, hostile when you think about it? Talley: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Preston: yes? What do you plan to do about it? Talley: Kill... Preston: Kill whom? Talley: Well, I don't have my golves to hide my fingerprints today. Preston: ...Ok, pick a number between 1 and 3. Talley: 2. Preston: Very good. Talley: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Preston: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Logan: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Alexander: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Ha Preston: Describe yourself in a nutshell. Talley: I am a nutshell. Preston: Do you do rootbeer? Talley: What do you mean by "do"? Preston: You know, use in any way. Talley: Drink? Preston: Yeah, that could be classified as "do". Talley: I drink rootbeer, I don't do anything else to rootbeer though. I drink rootbeer. Preston: Drinking rootbeer IS "doing" rootbeer. Talley: K-next question. Preston: Would you eat a five dollar bill if I gave you a ten dollar bill? Talley: What is on the five dollar bill, is it brand-new? Preston: No, it's not brand new, it's about a 98 maybe. Talley: No. Preston: Not for ten bucks? Talley: I would beat you and take the ten dollar bill and keep the five. Preston: Well you know, you could just go home and crap it out, your body won't digest it. Talley: I could stick it under my tongue or something also. Preston: No, you have to swallow it. Preston: But the question is: would you do it for ten dollars. Come on, You are gaining fifteen dollars because I am giving you the five to swallow. Talley: NO! Logan: You would make yourself throw up right after he leaves. Preston: Yeah. Talley: No, I don't want to throw up and I don't want to learn how. Preston: Here if you give me 50 cents, I'll give you this brand-new shiney nickel. Talley: Wait, I'm not stupid, Preston. Preston: Wait, that's not brand-new, replace the words "Brand-new" and "shiney" with "old" and "rotten". Talley: Ok?! |
| Exclusive Talley Interview |
| On April 4th 2002, I sat down with the famous Stephen Talley -- star of the Talley Fan Site run by Logan Jones and Alexander Early -- and he answered my questions on his personal feelings about the site, as well as other things that you may find to be disturbing. I interviewed him in the school cafeteria during lunch. Also present during the interview were Logan and Alexander, who interjected a few times in the interview. I must say that my peek into the mind of Stephen Talley was very disturbing and I must admit that it has caused a few nightmares. Talley showed raw and pure hatred in many of his answers regarding the Talley Fan Site, he feels that it is an unfair violation of his personal privacy and showed extreme hostility towards the creators of it. If you haven't already, I would suggest that you view the Talley Fan Site before you read this interview, it will help your understanding of the situation observed here. www.loganworld.com/talley |
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