It’s not two up.

 

By Prerafaelite © copyright April 2003.

 

Adele snapped her thong into position and stretched her unbelievably long legs out in front of her before slipping on her six inch, strappy spikes. She paraded around the room and gave Miranda a wicked little smile.

 

“You know Adele, you make me feel like a friggin' dwarf with you in those great hoofer shoes of yours, they must make you six four.”

 

“Six five actually, darling.”

 

Miranda rolled her eyes.

 

“Geez Adele, you threaten to poke most men’s eyes out with those hooters at that height… Hmmm, mind you, having said that, that just makes them perfect for me too.” Miranda laughed.

 

Adele plucked an invisible piece of lint off her shoulder.

 

“Ah well, enough frivolity, time for work. Staying for the show Miranda?”

 

“Yeah sure, I could do with a drink. Besides I like watching you work, it’s fun.”

 

Miranda’s lascivious grin had Adele wondering what her friend was up to. She knew better than to ask though. Miranda was a bit of a hoyden and it was best not to encourage her.

 

“Ok, well, I’ll look out for you later then.” Adele squeezed passed Miranda and out into the corridor with a flick of her platinum hair.

 

The bar was busy but not as packed as it would be later. Smoke from the patrons cigars wafted to the ceiling in little blue trails and puffing billows. The other skimpies were busy serving behind the bar or waiting tables. Adele walked regally across the floor clad only in her ruby red thong and matching stiletto heels. It was fortunate that her waist length hair kept some of the evening chill at bay.

 

She picked up her tray, stood behind the bar and took orders for drinks. The usual crowd of miners were in. Raucous laughter and good-natured bantering abounded. The pool tables were all occupied with intense matches for cash being played, and a tired old man playing dominoes with his equally wizened mates, helped to generate a slow hum of voices.

 

Miranda sat on a high stool at the end of the bar, legs crossed, with the top foot swinging in perfect beat to the piped rock music, five feet four of red haired firebrand. Adele cast her a nervous glance and noted that she had an open packet of mini Oreo’s. Not a good sign.

 

Adele’s countenance froze as the first Oreo flipped through the air up towards the ceiling, then back down, to be caught perfectly between Miranda’s teeth. It quickly disappeared behind the white pearlies to be followed shortly after by a swigged shot of whiskey.

 

A barely audible, “Oh dear God, she’s going to do it in here… Hell.” slipped past Adele’s lips. The shiver spread out from her fingers and fled to her toes.

 

The common pastime of coin balancing was practiced in this part of the goldfields. The idea was to see how long a girl could balance a gold coin on a nipple before it fell off, or was flicked off, by a punter. The girls were allowed to take evasive action and that added to the appeal. Much cash exchanged hands when this was done to everyone’s satisfaction. The skimpies got to keep the coins, which after an evening, could amount to a reasonable amount. However, the girls were paid handsomely for wearing the limited amount of uniform for their shifts, but this was also a cultural icon of some standing, so therefore demanded suitable remuneration.

 

The great Australian mating call of  “Show us yer tits, love.” Rang out as several bawdy miners gesticulated for Adele to come closer. Loud guffaws followed as Adele moved with catlike grace and a certain disdainful look on her face over towards their table.

 

Little did they know that Adele had a degree in nuclear medicine. This job paid more though, besides it was fun. Miss Prentice from Miss Prentice’s School of Deportment and Etiquette would be horrified but at least she had taught her how to walk with decorum in any circumstance.

 

“When’s the fruit and veg show on, love? Me and the boys just popped into town for that tonight. Thought we might get ourselves an eyeful.”

 

“Sorry Tom, it's not me tonight. Sally is doing that later and she won’t be here till nine. We’ve got zucchini and some of those lovely ladyfinger aubergines, Sal’s going to try the ‘Pricilla Queen of the desert’ stunt with them, the aubergines that is.”

 

“Strewth! You mean like the Chinese chick did in the movie? With the ping-pong balls? Shootin em out of her twat? Geez…” Tom and his mates’ eyeballs should have been on stalks.

 

“Yeah guys, just like that. Now can I get you a beer?”

 

General mutterings and several orders later. Adele was back at the boy’s table doling out frosted glasses full of amber nectar.

 

“Hey Addie, show us yer tits girl!”

 

She cast Tom a withering look at the shortening of her name and took the coins off the table. The chill factor was working to her advantage tonight, nipples hard as pebbles were long and prominent, making it easy for Adele to balance the coins.

 

Two minutes was all it took for her to win. That was the Bars’ time limit, couldn’t have a skimpy out of circulation for too long.

 

The very loud but very feminine voice from the lady sat at the bar had silence drop like a blanket across the room.

 

“Hey Addie, show us your tits.”

 

Gasps of incredulity spread amongst the crowd. Adele stiffened for a second and then bowed to the inevitable. Miranda could be like a terrier and would not let this one go without some serious trouble. Better to get it over and done with. She swallowed and moved across the floor to the waiting woman.

 

A slow curl of the corner of Miranda’s mouth was all the proof that Adele needed as to what her friend was going to do.

 

“That’s it sweetheart, show us all your tits.”

 

Miranda smiled gleefully as Adele took the two Oreos from Miranda’s outstretched hand. The bar remained silent.

 

Two chocolaty discs came to rest atop two perfectly pert, pink puckered perkies. Adele breathed imperceptibly as she waited for what she knew was coming. Still, the bar remained frozen in time.

 

A purple-coated talon moved forward and flipped first one nipple then the other, launching both Oreo’s high towards the ceiling from jiggling breasts. One, then two where caught between pristine white teeth. The crowd gasped as in a single movement Miranda sank to her knees in front of Adele and pulled aside her friends panties. Both Oreos disappeared. No one in the bar could tell if they there swallowed or what, they were far too fascinated by the tongue that did a quick reconnoitre of blond pussy.

 

Wet lipped and grinning like a fool, Miranda stood and seriously kissed her friend, pulling a finger in fast successive movements across Adele’s slit. Half a dozen strokes and Adele lost it, her legendary ‘I pass out when I come with an ear-splitting soprano aria’ made the windows shake.

 

Silence then again reined. But not for long.

 

Gold coins began clattering down on all tables, the cacophony of noise that was a mingled shout of  ‘Show us yer tits love,’ was just about deafening.  Reg the manager, plus two bouncers, hustled Miranda and Adele out the back to the waiting cab of the boys in blue.

 

“You two can spend the rest of your night at the lockup. At least you’ll be safe there.” Reg nodded to the commissioner as he drove off with the girls.

 

At least the police lockups’  “Christmas in July” party would get a bit livelier now that the girls were on their way…

 

 

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