By Prerafaelite © copyright November
2002. All rights reserved.
“What do you mean, you forgot the
corkscrew?”
“I said, I forgot the damn corkscrew.”
“Oh, Ok, don’t get your knickers in a
twist. Do you want some quiche?”
“Not yet, I’m busy.”
“Oh, Ok. Um, what are you doing with
that fork handle?”
“I’m playing cards. What do you recon
I’m doing, I’m trying to get the cork into the bottle so we can at least drink
some of this wine.”
“Err, you do know liquids don’t compress
don’t you?”
“Oh for God’s sake woman - oh.”
The silence stretched.
“Well, that was quite impressive Tim.
You look good coated in cabernet merlot with a fine dusting of beach sand. Hmm
gritty.”
Sally laughed as she wiggled her
eyebrows at her husband.
“Hey check out the chick in the red
bathers and reindeer ears. I would be way too embarrassed to be seen in public
in those things. No, the ears you dill, not the bikini. Geez, keep up ok? She’s
got a cute butt though.”
“Not as cute as yours Sal. Love that new
thong you’ve got on too. You look sensational.”
“ Aw thanks gorgeous. You know, I’m
really glad you didn’t get that back, sack and crack wax like your sister
hinted you get when we were over their place last time. She has a nerve to
suggest you’re that hairy. She should take a look at her moustache. Besides,
you would have looked like a rough-mown grass airstrip after they finished.
Hey! Don’t tickle me, I was only joking! What time are they supposed to be
getting here anyway? The sea breeze will be in soon and the surfs looking good,
be a pity to miss it.”
“They’re on their way. Mark left a
message on my mobile phone while you were dragging the shade tent out of the
back of the car. They’ve got more food and grog with them too and Greg’s got
the esky loaded with ice so we should be right for the afternoon if it gets any
hotter. What did you dig me in the ribs for now?”
“Ooh - look at the tourists. They have
to be from northern Europe, you can’t have legs that pale out of shorts, unless
they haven’t seen the light of day in like, a million years. God, I hope they
brought heaps of sun block with them, they’re going to need it if they don’t
want to fry. The tall dude has great knees…”
“Man Sal, do you ever think about
anything else other than body parts?”
“Um, no. I’m
a connoisseur. It’s my favourite sport and you well
know it. You’re just jealous ‘coz I spot all the great looking chicks before
you do.”
“Pah, in your dreams babe.”
“Oh yeah? Is that right?”
She squealed when he pushed her
backwards and the red wine hit her belly. She moaned when his tongue followed
the ruby liquid trail. She sighed when he covered them with the shade tent and
covered her, with him.
“I love the southern hemisphere,
Christmas is so much more interesting here. You ready for a good Rudolphing
Sal?”
“Is that like a Christmas version of
come hide the sausage, Tim?”
Mark, Greg, Susan and Louise found them
both giggling riotously, hidden below the low limestone rock face at the far
end of the beach. Sally’s bikini was a little dishevelled and Tim’s hair was
standing on end. They both looked guiltily up as their relatives descended upon
them.
“Um, merry Christmas guys. It’s a bit
hot down here in the sun.” Sally’s face grew pink as everyone laughed.