I feel an interruption in the equilibrium of our mattress. I barely open one eye. A blue eye stares me in the face,

"Dad! Max is teasing me,"

"Max, stop teasing Georgina," I state groggily. I summon just enough energy to cross my fingers in hope they'll leave me alone,

"Mom, Georgie just told on me,"

"Georgie, don't be a tattletale," I hear Gia murmur. She's still asleep I think. Suddenly I feel a mass land on my stomach and then feel the pain spreading. I decide this can't go on any longer. I'm quite sure there's some sort of legislation for minors that decrees that to sleep in past eight o'clock is illegal. I sit up and open my eyes to see Oliver grinning up at me. I want desperately to be mad at him but I can't,

"What are you doing up this early?" I scold my four-year-old son, playfully. I lift him up holding him at his waist and place him back down carefully on my thighs,

"Couldn't sleep, daddy. There were birds outside my window going chirp, chirp, chirp,"

"Chirp, chirp, chirp," Max, Oliver's other half, joins in. Suddenly Georgie starts "chirping" too.

"We drew birds in school the other day," she sings. She started kindergarten the other and hasn't stopped talking about it. I'm suddenly transformed into a playground as they climb all over me. I catch a glimpse of Gia in the midst of the arms and legs and she's lying down on her stomach, still trying to fall back to sleep,

"Baby, I think maybe you should get up. I believe our offspring are trying to eradicate their parents,

"Daddy?" Oliver's voice comes from behind my head,

"Yeah?"

"What's othsprink?"

"It's another word for children," Gia declares as she pulls Max off me and seats him on her,

"And what's edadicate?" Max asks her.

"Eradicate," Gia corrects, "It means you're trying to get rid of us," She tickles Max and he starts flailing his arms about in the air. "Mommy!" he shrieks,

"Gimme a hug and I'll stop," she grins. Max throws his arms around her neck and she pulls him in tightly,

"Me mommy, me!" Georgie tramples all over us three boys in her bid to get to mommy.

"Me too mommy," and suddenly Oliver assaults Gia too. I can barely see my wife in the midst of all the kids.

"Me too mommy," I yell out and I hear her giggling in there somewhere. Georgie starts laughing and then the boys catch on. Those two don't know what they're laughing at but they're laughing anyway, just so they don't get left out of the joke. The laughing dies down and Georgie states seriously as she clambers onto my stomach and seats herself there,

"I woke up last night,"

"Oh yeah, did you have a bad dream?" I ask her,

"Not really. I don't know why I woke up," she pauses thoughtfully, "I thought I heard some funny noises but they stopped and then I went back to sleep and everything was okay after that," I glance over at Gia and she gives me a look.

"It was probably just mommy and I watching TV," I tell her.

"Probably," she agrees,

"Maybe it was the boogie man," Oliver yells,

"Oooh," Max wails, "The boogieman,"

"Guys, there's no such thing as the boogieman," Gia tries to calm them down. Calming down two four year olds that have gotten too good a night's sleep is not easy.

"Then what did Georgie hear?"

"We told you," I reply, "Mommy and I just had the TV on too loud," Well, something was on too loud anyway,

"How about we get breakfast?" Gia asks, anxiously wanting to change the subject, "Cinnamon toast?"

"Yum!" That clears them off the bed quicker than Batman answering the Bat signal. Oh dear, I think I've regressed. Gia and I get up off the bed and she wraps her arms around my waist as she follows me out the door,

"Keep the TV down baby," she smirks,

"You keep the TV down, baby," I grin and kiss her lightly, we stand at the doorway swapping spit until we hear a shriek. I should have listened to my parents: parenthood is not easy.