Uncle Pratap 1, William Nyah Nyah 0

Back when I was working at an advertising firm called the Marsupial's Arsehole (we lovingly knew it as MarsHole), I was deeply troubled by what my Uncle Pratap told me about how you must respect older people because they have more frequent flyer miles on this planet. This he said just as ke keeled over from drinking a little too much Ribena Light (Mobile to the uninitiated).

I told an uninterested room that if that was the case, Hitler should have won WWII since genocide would have been ovelooked at certain concentration camps due to the respect he would have received as an elder respected leader of the German people. Or maybe people should have listened to Lenin and Stalin. Just as I wondered how this line of reasoning was going to help Davin Choudhery's (Davin lives 2 doors from us) grocery shopping list for the hols, Uncle Pratap lunged for the door in an unintoxicated stupor yelling " Okaylah boy! Shut the Fuck Up! I'll go over to your office and kick your Boss for you. Okay? Happy?"

And so there I was standing feeling quite hungry and confused (I didn't have lunch yet). I was pondering why Uncle Pratap wanted to kick my boss William Nyah Nyah in the arse. It sudddenly dawned on me why when I remembered Aesop's quote: "Fools take to themselves the respect that is given to their office". William was a mean bastard child of a boss. Sometimes I remembered him jerking off in his room as he read the Malay Mail. I had told Uncle Pratap many times of his transgressions upon the other staff and me. Do you know what he said to me in a manner befitting a fool? "Bloody hell, if it's one thing I cannot stand is a punk who gets off on the Mail". He said that if I told him another one more time he would personally visit William and give him a reason for having a medical plan.

Later that night when Uncle Pratap had returned from MarsHole, and we were all having Rojak with Thousand Island's sauce, he said: "Damn it's good to get a little exercise now and then". Without another word said between us we went to bed.

I never did get around to asking him what went down that fateful day though. But looking on the brigther side I'm not pissed off anymore these days. And just the other day I saw William with what looked like a dildo strapped on his forehead shopping in 1 Utama with his new boyfriend (William is gay by the way).

I was just glad I was out of that Nut Bar!

We love you Uncle Pratap! Yyyyyeeeeeeeaaaaaaa!!!