| Gorf's |
| Pad |
![]() |
![]() |
| Hello there! I'm Gorf the fern. This is where I live. It's so comfy and there's plenty of nutter butters and tea to go around, so stay a while. |
| -Conversations with Master Emu- |
| Master Emu: So Gorf, how does it feel to be my new sidekick?! Gorf: It's actually pretty cool Master Emu, but do we get to save anybody? Master Emu: Umm....no...Actually your the sidekick for my website. I'm your leader. And despite what you think, I can see everything you do. Gorf: HAHA...oh...So that means you know I let your flock of emus loose? Master Emu: Indeed. I got those back by the way. Your lucky this time you little prick. Gorf: WHAT!!! THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS!!! They hypnotized me I swear! Then they beat me with a floppy disk. Master Emu: Did you just think that excuse up? Gorf: Nope I have been planning it extensively since noon. Master Emu: ...... Gorf: ...... Master Emu: Gorf? Gorf: Yeah? Master Emu: Stop chicken dancing, it makes me even more angry. Gorf: Oh sorry. |
| Gorf: So Master Emu, can I call you Masta? Master Emu: Ya sure, whatever suits you. Gorf: COOL! I thought you were one of those really boring type of guys. Master Emu: Well...err...you see Gorf. My website is anything BUT boring. The whole point of it is to be funny Gorf: Hmm. Well at least your cool. I don't know about how funny you are. Master Emu: Ahh, I see. Gorf: Can I ask you a very very serious question Masta? Masta: Shoot. Gorf: Ok. What do you think about the movie The Knockaround Guys? You know the one with Vin Diesel in it? Master Emu: Gorf why the hell do you ask questions that 1) are extremely stupid, and 2) that could get you hurt? In other words, I THINK THE KNOCKAROUND GUYS IS GOING TO BE EXTREMELY HORRIBLE BECAUSE IT HAS VIN DIESEL IN IT!!!!! Gorf: Oh. WAIT YOU DON'T LIKE VIN DIESEL??!!! He's a hottie, how could you not like him? Master Emu: Gorf, I'm starting to dislike you. Gorf: Tis to be expected el bastard. |
| <----Ok this is the link home. Try and guess what this picture is! |
| Gorf: Hey Masta, you will never believe who I saw on the way to work today!!!! Master Emu: Oh really? Gorf: I saw Avant Garde from your comics website! Master Emu: Oh GOD NO!!!! Not that stoner dude! Last time I saw him he thought he was a rabid dog. Man that guy was high. Avant Garde: WHAT!!! I am not a stoner!!! I just act like one! Master Emu: Oh....well now that we got that all cleared up, I have the issue that my emus are again missing. I know it was one of you guys, probably the stoner. Avant Garde: I'm not a stoner!! Besides, I didn't do it. I saw Gorf handing out jet packs to your emus around noon. Gorf: WHAT!!! How could it have been me!!!! Avant Garde: Dude I video tapped you doing it!! Gorf: Oh phooey! Well my pop tarts ready so I have to attend to it now. |
![]() |
| Gorf: Hey Masta guess what! I found another cool guy too help us with our "little conversations." Master Emu: Gorf as much as I appreciate your enthusiasm on helping me with my website, you are really bad at picking people. Gorf: Hey shut up! This guy is cool! Look here he is, Kenny G!!! Kenny G: Hiya guys!!! I would like to play some funky jazz to express my feelings!! I think my "improv" on the birthday song will help me express my true feelings. -(plays a saxophone solo)- Gorf: Whoa that was a bit too wild! Isn't this guy a maniac?! Master Emu: (whispers to gorf) Gorf psst. This guy is evil I think. That saxophoe has a mark of pure evil on it. Do you see the quail mark on it? Gorf: Oh God!!! Your right!!!! Kill Kenny G!!!!! Kenny G: Kill me???!!! You can't kill me after that solo dudes!!! I TAKE MY TRUE FORM NOW!!!! BOW TO THE SMOOTHNESS OF MY MUSIC!!!!!! YOU WILL BOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!!! -(Turns into the vile Kenny Quail)- Gorf: I'm not going for this Master Emu Master Emu: Yeah this guy is really lame. Gorf: Quick stuff his saxophone with silly putty!!! -(Stuffs a wad of putty in)- Kenny Quail: NOOOOO!!!! I AM BEATEN!!!! THE SMOOTH EVIL I HAVE BEEN PLAYING FOR YEARS IS GONE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!! -(Kenny Quail dissolves into the air as a jet of water vapor.)- Moral: Never trust quails, and Gorf has a large supply of silly putty, so he could hook you up with some if you want. |
| Due to lack of funniness, I am discontinuing this series. If you like it and want me to keep doing it tell me in the guestbook. |
![]() |