* Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.

* Everyone should have a spouse, because there are a number of 
things that go wrong that one can't blame on  the government.

  * Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?

  * Death is hereditary.

* There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and 
the right side.

  * An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and 
makes it sound confusing.

  * Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference 
.

  * When you're right, no one remembers. When you're.  wrong, no 
one forgets

  * Well done is better than well said.

  * Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody 
is looking.

  * If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull 
side.

  * Pessimist: A person that looks both ways when crossing a one 
way street.

  * Where there's a will there are five hundred relatives.

  * Love thy neighbor, but be sure her husband is away.

  * Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

